Interview: Lisa Rinna
“My girls think I am the kookiest mother.”
by Mary Ann Cooper
June 9, 2009
As you describe in your book, your parenting techniques are by trial and error. One of your success stories is the "Caught Red-Handed" exercise. What's that about?
We went through a period when Delilah was lying a lot. I guess a lot of kids go through it, but she was lying — flat out lying and we went to the school conference and the teachers were concerned. She would say things that weren't true so that everyone would
like her. We just didn't know how to get around it. One day it came up. Somebody said something that I knew for sure wasn't true and I said, "you know what? When I say something that slips out of my mouth and it's not right I put my hands in the air and say,
'Caught red-handed!'" It worked like a charm. Because what it did was free everybody because all you had to do was put your arms up in the air and say, "Oops, caught red- handed. I lied." I guarantee that was what changed it. Delilah no longer lies. I'm a person
who is into admitting when I fail. I do this with my husband if I hurt his feelings; I'm really good at calling him and saying, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that."
Let's talk about the girls. Do they take after you or Harry?
Both are very different. The older one, Delilah, is more like me. She's silly and goofy and quite a character. And Amelia is much more like Harry. She's more serious and strong — strong-willed, stubborn. We love to be together and Sunday is always family day.
We make one day where it's just us, altogether. But both are really filled with light. They're happy and fearless for sure, and from what I understand (from speaking to their teachers in school) they have a very strong work ethic. I love hearing that. The
teachers say they're driven and even if things are difficult they don't give up. They're very strong in that way, which I think is great.
"I'm constantly a
work in progress as a mom."It has to be tough to keep from spoiling them. After all, they get to see and do a lot of things their peers can't — just because you and Harry are celebrities. How do you keep them grounded?
I'm hyper sensitive about it. You just have to be diligent about it. I don't shower them with everything they want. Yes, we do get to go to a Jonas Brothers concert or the screening of a movie and they're aware of that. They certainly know that that is not
the norm and they are so so very blessed and lucky that we get to do those things. I'm like a broken record telling them that, but that's really all you can do. On the other hand, they've been around fame all their lives. Harry and I are lucky — our fans
are really lovely and generous. And when people do come up to us the girls are very empathetic with them. Let's say I didn't want to be bothered and I would start to say, "Guys, I am with the kids, I'll do it another time," my girls would say, "No, no, no,
mom, sign the autograph, take the picture. Do it!" They have empathy and they make sure that I sign every autograph and take every picture, which I think is lovely. I don't know where that came from. I don't know what I'm doing right. I knock on wood every
day because they really are great kids.
You must have enrolled your girls in special mother and daughter classes, right? So what did you learn from that experience?
Your kids will be fine whether they take those special classes or not. That's what I've learned. I get something out of everything I go through. There are plenty of things that don't work that teach us more than the things that do work. I'm constantly a
work in progress as a mom and I'm constantly learning. You have to go through it, though, and you need to come to a point where you say none of this matters. The one thing I know is that there is no such thing as the perfect mother. So stop feeling guilty.
About the Author
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Mary Ann Cooper is a freelance entertainment journalist living in New Jersey with her husband, Gary. Her work regularly appears in GRAND Magazine. She can be found online at www.maryanncooper.net |
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