feedback for "Bad Parent: Let Them Eat Nuggets"

1. Your  kids eat vegetables? Why is this in the Bad Parent column? I decided a long time ago that the red sauce on a can of Chef Boyardee counted as veggies.

   posted by : youngshay on 1/31/2008 at 2:32 PM Flag For Abuse

2. I wonder what life will be like for my child since we don't eat meat. That pretty much rules out chicken nuggets and hot dogs. What bland crap will he demand? And if picky eating is a phase all kids go through, why does accepting this make you a bad parent? Particularly since experts have said making a huge deal about it makes the problem worse? I mean... let's be controversial here. Maybe if you were smoking a crack pipe before dinner to get you through...

   posted by : mcglory13 on 1/31/2008 at 2:53 PM Flag For Abuse

3. My 2-yr old son is really skinny and we're always struggling to keep him up to a decent weight, so we pretty much give him any hearty, high-fat, high-calorie food that he'll eat with gusto.  Plus, he can't eat dairy, so even harder.
    
   Also, we don't like to use dessert as a bribe because it makes whatever we're trying to bribe him to eat seem like a punishment.
    
   When he asks for ice-cream (soy) we just say - "sure, you can have some in a bit", not "only if you eat x first".  If he persists I tell him to keep eating what he's eating while I get the ice cream ready.  Then I just get it ready really slowly.  That's often enough to get him to finish most or all of his meal.
    
   It's kind of like a bribe I guess. :)  But maybe with a bit less direct confrontation.
    
    
    

   posted by : k1 on 1/31/2008 at 2:54 PM Flag For Abuse

4. Yeah, this is not even in the same ball part as most of the other columns Babble's been publishing lately.  This is normal and doesn't make me want to unsubscribe.
   

   posted by : CaliMama on 1/31/2008 at 3:06 PM Flag For Abuse

5. I'm so glad you wrote this!  We had so many battles over food, and I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who doesn't even stress over the "just try one bite" schtick.  Sometimes we just have to trust them, that they know their own bodies and will get what they need.  Now if you could just tell my ("I'll put some pounds on him when he's here visiting") mother in law, that would be great!   

   posted by : Upat5ameveryday on 1/31/2008 at 3:12 PM Flag For Abuse

6. mcGlory13, I do the same.  "Hey, have a few  bites more while I get "x." But we don't fix separate meals. The kid eats what we do, and we eat a lot of veggies.       It's easiest to just stay the course from the word go, but you can be good  influence on your child's diet
   

   posted by : cookMom on 1/31/2008 at 3:12 PM Flag For Abuse

7. my kid's veggie and used to eat practically anything i made for him.  i too was a homemade baby-food maker and would hide pureed broccoli in the mac 'n' cheese and sweet potatoes in the pasta sauce.  he loved it all!
   
   
    
   now, at seventeen months, he lives on bananas, apples, yogurt, cheddar crackers and some kind of mock meat dipped in ketchup (boca, morningstar, gardenburger, etc.)  i'm running out of ideas!  he will, however, eat a black bean and rice soft taco from chipotle with mild pico, cheese, and guac. 
   
   
   
   

   posted by : paulahess on 1/31/2008 at 3:20 PM Flag For Abuse

8. Applegate Farms 100% Organic Grass-Fed Beef Hot Dogs - no nitrates, no nitrites and (SHOCK) they taste great. 'Nuff said.

   posted by : erickaweb on 1/31/2008 at 4:53 PM Flag For Abuse

9. I have no problem with Bad Parent's decision but want to give others hope that the picky phase can end. After being a "great eater" my son suddenly turned picky at 3. But I refused to stray from my "one family, one meal" plan and it pays off.
   Let your kids help make decisions about dinner so it doesn't become a power struggle. Corn or peas tonight? Which shape of pasta should we buy? I even let my son pick what we have for dinner one night a week and yes we ALL eat Mac n' Cheese that night. I make sure theres one thing every night I know he likes, whether it's pasta with oil & parmigiano as a side dish or apple slices and plain rice when we have spicy curry. Or I serve his portion sauceless if its spicy.
   The payoff is worth it. Last night my son proclaimed that he loves brussels sprouts and gobbled down 8 of them despite at least a dozen prior struggles for him to eat just one. When it was his turn to pick a restaurant last week, he insisted on the seafood joint because he wanted calamari. I know now that he TRULY hates Chinese, but that's why it comes with white rice and fortune cookies, right?

   posted by : tonik122 on 1/31/2008 at 5:23 PM Flag For Abuse

10. I love you for writing this. Like you, we have two dinners at our
    house -- one for the kids and one for the adults. I've long stopped
    trying to pester them into trying new foods... that doesn't mean I
    serve them crap, it just means that if they want ground beef, rice, and
    apples for dinner every single night, fine by me. If they want chicken
    nuggets, I buy organic chicken tenders, coat them with panko, and fry
    them in olive oil. (And yes, this is as easy and fast as popping them
    into the microwave... you just have to have the ingredients on hand.)
    
    
     
    The one thing we DO do is try to model adventurous eating. And
    every once in awhile these kids will LIKE something strange. My son
    won't eat a grilled cheese sandwich to save his life, but fried squid
    legs are a favorite. The daughter won't eat peaches (I seriously can't
    understand that one) but she can eat ikura (salmon roe) straight from
    the plastic tub. These kids just like what they like.

    posted by : sfwork on 2/1/2008 at 1:38 PM Flag For Abuse

11. My kid is a veggie (now 4) and there are days when she eats everything we do and there are days when she only wants veggie nuggets and plain pasta.
    
     
    For Mcglory, paula and other veggies: Our kid has always liked any and every kind of beans _ plain, in soup, pureed in a dip or spread, etc. Lately she LOVES black beans mixed with corn and cheese in a taco. Also lentils are always good. I'll start a dahl and then take a portion out for her before spicing ours up. Firm stir fried tofu with soy sauce (salty!) is a huge hit. Hummus and crackers with some cheese and veggies is a good lunch. I also give her nuts as a snack to boost her protein for the nights when she'll only eat white rice and we call her "the rickets kid."  And edamame. We call it super peas and she'll eat like 20 pods.
     
    Oh and a huge help was when I stopped letting her snack after about 3 pm. If she wants something to eat around 4 or 5 she can have any veggie she wants - she'll often eat a huge bowl of peas while I'm making dinner.

    posted by : me on 2/1/2008 at 9:39 PM Flag For Abuse

12. It gets better - just stay the course!! I have no argument with those of you who make 2 meals, but there's no way I'm going that route. I make varied meals and somewhere in there they'll find something to eat. My 3.5 year old went through a phase of not wanting anything but I just kept putting the meals in front of him and now he always has seconds of things like peas, broccoli and corn. My baby won't eat much but he likes spear shaped food so I cut everything in that shape for him (including meat - we just keep a close eye on him) and he tastes everything (and rejects it, but at least he's exploring...). By the way, I was a mother's nightmare picky eater and she made it worse by engaging in battles of will with me and I will not do that - makes the situation worse, and, really, it does blow over if they're not getting a lot of power out of it. I've even stopped nagging "eat some more", "2 more bites" etc and what a difference - peace!!! I have 2 boys and I just think when they're 16 they will be eating everything in the house, so don't sweat it. But I'm not giving my kids highly processed food because I believe it gives them a taste for it and I want them developing a taste for real, fresh and nutritious foods - there are already far too many over weight kids in this country. Those habits start young.

    posted by : Lisaloo on 2/3/2008 at 4:04 PM Flag For Abuse

13. I try to hide the fact that I'm fixing 2 meals by just including something that I know he'll eat along with what I'm putting on the table for the rest of us. But admittedly there are times I make the kids quesedillas while my husband and I eat grown up food. My favorite finds though are edamame (we cal them peek a boo beans because it's fun to pop them out and say peek a boo), organic microwavable mac and cheese from Trader Joe's - a staple during after day-care swim class season, quesadillas dipped in plain yogurt, and we all love chicken Pho (Vietnamese noodle soup). And I'm glad to say that my son believes that an apple or a banana is a great snack. I do the "you have to take 5 bites" thing, etc. but was happy to recently learn that young kids are supposed to get 70% of their calories before 1pm, so am relieved to know that the huge breakfast and lunch my 4 year old eats, coupled with a tiny supper, is actually quite normal. It's getting better - mine also ate 4 brussel sprouts earlier this week!

    posted by : Allison on 2/6/2008 at 12:23 AM Flag For Abuse

14. My picky one is 2, and he will eat anything as long as it's yogurt, vienna sausages, diced pears, and goldfish crackers. Just kidding - those are the staples, but he also likes bratwurst, sauerkraut, pickled beets, mustard, homemade waffles with ketchup (eewww...), decaf tea, juice, skim milk, and pretty much anything I am eating. The older two will eat anything that doesn't eat them first (with a marked preference for junk food or course). My solution is to fix a meal that I would have eaten as a kid (I was allergic to 27 common foods as a child, and I still ate), and if hubby and I want something we know they won't like (not that I can think of anything like that), then we fix them some pizza or warm up some leftovers for them. Picky eating is a phase that children will usually outgrow as long as they continue to be exposed to new foods. "Try a bite" is a phrase heard weekly in my house. My kids are happy, healthy, and strong, and they look forward to a family dinner every night.

    posted by : poosemommy on 5/15/2008 at 1:04 AM Flag For Abuse

15. I get that it's easier to feed the kids nuggets and mac'n'cheese all the time, but part of what parents are supposed to do is make healthy choices for kids who are too young to make them for themselves. And really, I think it sets up unrealistic expectations for working moms and dads to think we have to provide two meals a night. I've also read that a good way to combat childhood obesity is to sit down to dinner as a family.

    posted by : goorganic on 6/30/2008 at 5:33 PM Flag For Abuse

16. No "two dinners" in this house! My kids (ages four, and five and a half) can choose what they want for breakfast and lunch, and lunch is often mac and cheese or salami or spaghetti-O's, but breakfast must include a fruit and lunch must include a veggie, and they drink milk except for the apple juice that they get at preschool. For dinner, they eat what we do, or they don't eat. Period. (They truly will not starve.) And it is not a battle! If you start from the beginning with the assumption that OF COURSE your kids will like all kinds of food, and that eating lots of different foods is fun, then they just grow up with that attitude. We do use dessert as a bribe, and I don't see anything wrong with that, if it gets them to have that exposure that they need. The exposure has paid off --they love olives, artichokes, calamari, broccoli, everything (except one child does not like her food spicy). Other than the dessert they eat mostly healthy snacks (and no soda!) but we are not purists by any means --they probably eat McD's a couple times a month at least, and I don't say no to the cookie at Sunday school or the lollipop from the bank teller. A few things that we have found helpful:  1. A little fat is OK, if it makes them enjoy the food. Artichokes dipped in melted butter, broccoli with ranch dip --fine. Salt is OK too.  2. Don't assume that they won't like it! It riles me up when (at parties for example) I see kids (not just my own) asking to try a food, and their parents say "oh, you won't like that." Why not assume that they will, and let them try, and praise them for trying something new? Our seven year old neighbor will eat things at our house that he would never eat at home, because we just assume that he will like them, and we present the idea of trying new foods as cool and fun. 3. Let them order off of the adult menu. Why limit kids to the kids menu, which will limit them to chicken tenders or pizza? I encourage my girls to order anything they think sounds good, or I make suggestions for things from the adult menu that I think are reasonably kid friendly but above the level of the kids menu. Yeah, they can't finish it and we take the rest home, but that's fine if it makes them eat better.  4. Of course, involve them in cooking. My five year old LOVES "arranging" food --such as laying out a vegetable tray or fruit tray in a pattern. "The celeries are the grass, and the salami and olives are the flower, and the cheese slices are the sky, and see, the red pepper slices are a mommy and baby caterpillar..."  5. The most important thing --we eat together as a family every night, a proper meal at a properly set table, where we talk about our day --no TV, no distractions, no everyone grabbing random food at random times. It helps them see food as a positive experience. (BTW, I was a horribly picky eater as a child, and, yes, I survived, but I want it to be different for my kids --and it is.)
    

    posted by : Kathy on 4/30/2009 at 11:53 PM Flag For Abuse