feedback for "Alone in a Crowd"

1. Amen, amen, amen! Thank you for writing this. I'm in the same boat right now with an 8 month old and a slew of friends who don't understand why I can't still meet up for cocktails after work or go see a band that doesn't go on until 11:00 at night. Plus, I'm not really a "joiner" and places like Gymboree scare the hell out of me. So for me, motherhood has been a bit lonely. But it's always good to find kindred spirits. Even if it's on the internet.
   

   posted by : Blot on 11/21/2007 at 2:51 PM Flag For Abuse

2. That was great; I was especially taken by the notion that every [parent] thinks [they're] a hip [parent]...  So so true, as evidenced by the existence of almost every one of the bloggers on Babble.  We are no hipper than our parents, really; we simply seem more self conscious about it. 
   I do feel for you ; we were the first in our circle to give it up and bring one into the world.  we now have four little San Franciscans running around the house and city and have watched our formerly principled and all knowing friends backpedal on numerous proclamations (Marin, public schools, keeping the bong) made BC.  Don't worry, everyone will catch up. 
   
   

   posted by : benhops on 11/21/2007 at 4:50 PM Flag For Abuse

3. I didn't read how old you are and if your friends have reached a point where biologically reproducing is becoming impossible.  (Then perhaps adoption would still be an option.)  If you are south of forty, then, yes, maybe they'll "catch up" within the next couple of years.    I was "all alone" (well, except for my spouse) when I was 28 and pregnant ten years ago.  I waited almost five years for my first close [local] friend to follow suit.  The first couple years of motherhood were extremely tough on me socially.  We took Kid (and then Kids) to the bars and the parties and the bowling alleys to be with our friends.  Friends were sweet to the Kid/s, but we usually left hours before everyone else or didn't show up when Kid/s were sick or whatever.  I had to have a couple of really difficult heart-to-hearts with girlfriends who just "didn't get it" and said I was less spontaneous (yeah, duh!)    Now at 38 I'd say two thirds of my friends have had a kid - many are sticking with just one.  I have three.  And mine are older - which is a bonus.  I feel like an old wise lady in my rocking chair issuing sage advice in re tantrums and mashing vs. mincing.  It's actually quite fun to be in this position - motherhood has worn on me and fits like an old soft slipper (or is that just an apt description of my body at this point??)   Thanks for the article.  I hope a friend or two springs some baby news on you very soon - I agree I would not trade parenthood for the world, but it is even more fun when you can share the journey w/ good friends.

   posted by : BBBGMOM on 11/21/2007 at 10:32 PM Flag For Abuse

4. great piece... not sure where you are on the baby scene, but it's almost 5 years later for me. after many failed attempts at "hanging" with the mommies at the park, I finally gave up and decided I'd stick with the friends that I liked. funny thing is, the gap between "with kids" and "no kids" is not so large now that my kids are older. now, they look forward to seeing them because the kids are more "interactive." so be patient. I think the baby years are the hardest... it really does get better and better.
   

   posted by : sfwork on 11/26/2007 at 3:46 PM Flag For Abuse

5. Thank you! Thank you for letting me know that I am not the only parent out there with babyless friends and who really hasn't 'connected' with other moms met thru the numerous parent forums/groups I've joined out of desperation. I'm still hoping I can at least make one decent mom friend via these sites because surely there are others out there like me! Your article is proof! I became a parent pretty late in life (38) and most of my friends are a little younger than me so I'm hoping they will catch up soon!
   
   

   posted by : luluvision on 11/27/2007 at 2:43 PM Flag For Abuse

6. 
   I was one of the last of our group of friends to get married and procreate, and I feel like I timed it about right (well, there was a wave of us having kids simultaneously). It seems like it's isolating to be either too late or too early ... it's now the single childless friends in our old gang that are feeling a bit isolated I think (though they are always invited to play with our little troublemakers).
   

   posted by : chattydaddy on 11/27/2007 at 10:56 PM Flag For Abuse