Babble

Fellow Babblers --

My six month-old son is a super easy baby in many ways--he takes two good naps every day and is in bed by 6:30-7:00 p.m. He wakes up and starts his days around 6:00 a.m. The problem is what happens in between those 11 hours. He wakes up twice a night (on occasion, even three times) to nurse. Our pediatrician said that babies his age can go 6-10 hours at night without needing to eat, so I should just ignore him for one of those wake-ups and let him cry until he falls back asleep, but that hasn't worked; the whimpering will escalate to crying, which will escalate to screaming, and soon I'll find myself back in his room. I've tried sending my husband in there to just change him or rub his belly, but that never works, either. Giving him a full bottle right before bed also hasn't made any difference.

So, those of you with six month-olds or who remember this age, what's a normal nighttime wake pattern? And when can I expect that he might go down to one wake-up, and then none?

--Bleary-eyed in Chicago

My daughter is almost 8 months.  Despite our pediatrician's insistence that she doesn't need to eat at night, the babe insists that yes...she does want to eat once, sometimes twice between 6:00 PM and 6:00 AM.  We had to do sleep training at six months to get her to sleep at all in her crib.  Putting her down drowsy but awake and letting her cry has helped her learn to sleep alone and take much better naps.  It was terribly difficult, but so was having to sleep with her and nurse for 12 hours each night and for naps.  And despite all my efforts, I still had a grumpy, sleepy baby most days.  Does your son go down for the night drowsy or asleep?  That is the most important factor for decreasing night wakings/feedings.

Gradually, my little one has decreased her night wakings/feedings from too many to count to just once or twice.  I try to be very consistent.  If she wakes sooner than four hours from the last feeding, I have to let her cry.  Going in to soothe her by rubbing her back used to help, but now it just makes her angrier.  I hate letting her cry, but I also know that she's not hungry.  If she's not hungry, she only wants to nurse for comfort, and I am at the point when I need her to learn to self-soothe without so much of my help.  If it's been long enough when she wakes, I rush in to feed her and don't make her wait. 

Letting your baby cry will work.  But success in this situation means that your baby fell back to sleep without your help--not that he fell asleep without crying and screaming.  It's totally okay if you don't want to let him cry--but then it also must be alright with you that you'll probably be feeding him 2-3 times a night for awhile.  Good luck with whatever you decide!

Thanks, BabyCakies. We did Weissbluth-ize him and let him cry when he turned four months, and the process worked in about four days. He always goes to bed now awake but drowsy and only cries for a minute. Unfortunately, it hasn't made any difference in his night wakings, but maybe I'll try letting him cry a bit longer at nights. I just worry that if he gets too upset it will be harder for him to fall back asleep (and harder for his parents to fall back asleep as well after staying up listening to him for a long time). 

For what it's worth, our daughter was still waking twice a night to feed at 6 months old.  The "experts" disagree on when babies can go a full night without eating (even Weissbluth says it can be up to 10 months old) and it seemed to me that my daughter was hungry.  So I fed her.  She self-weaned at 11.5 months and dropped all of her night-feedings.  That may not be what you want to hear in terms of timing, but I have no regrets that I didn't do CIO.

Babies wake for many reasons. Sometimes it's out of habit, sometimes it's because they haven't been taught how to fall asleep by themselves and need help at night when they wake up to fall back to sleep (they go down being fed, rocked, with a pacifier, etc), sometimes it's just because they are hungry (despite what the "experts" say about that) sometimes it's gas, they're too hot/cold etc. My daughter is 8 months old and has never slept through the night. She falls asleep on her own at night and for naps with no crying but still gets up at night every 3-5 hours for a bottle. I tried everything (including CIO) but nothing has helped because I honestly believe that she is hungry (even though she eats plenty during the day). I think she just doesn't feel full for that long. Every baby is different. You have to just try to figure out why the baby is waking and problem solve from there. A lot of sleep books have different suggestions, but I have found that if it is a hunger issue nothing will stop the waking till their ready. Some babies sleep good and some don't. I'm hoping my next child will sleep longer stretches!

Hello!

My son is now almost nine months, but I had the same issue when he was six months old.  My pediatrician also told us he no longer needed to eat at night, and suggested phasing out the night feedings.  I had a difficult time hearing him cry and not responding, but luckily my husband coached me through it!  It seems cruel to let your baby cry, but if I knew it would work in a matter of three days, I would have done it sooner.  We let him cry it out when he was about 7 months, and after tree days of being consistent, he no longer woke up to be fed.  I am really happy we stuck with it, and he is happier getting more sleep! 

I strongly believe all babies are different. My 3 year old didn't sleep through the night until he was 15 months. I tried to let him cry it out at around 9 months. He screamed for 1hour 15 minutes before I went in and got him. He was pale, sweaty and looked distressed. I truely think he would have cried for hours. My seven month old has slept throuigh the night since 41/2 months. I have done nothing different, they just have different temperments. Good Luck

my daughter is 7 months, goes to sleep awake, not asleep and will wake up once or twice in the night to feed.  she is hungry so I feed her.  if she wakes up two hours after she ate and I know she's not hungry, then I talk her back to sleep while patting her back until she calms down, but I still make her finish the falling asleep on her own.

 I don't believe in CIO...in my opinion, it's way too harsh.  I found that the Baby Whisperer works better for me and baby. 

Thanks for asking this question. My son is getting ready to be 7 months & I was asking the same question. When I went for his 6 month well-baby check-up the pediatrician said the same to me. I figured if the baby is hungry, he's hungry & needs to be fed. So, far he has been weaning himself off his nighttime feedings. He does one feeding & then sometimes does the second & sometimes not. He definetly is decreasing the amount he is eating in just one feeding as well. So, it sounds to me like our babies are okay. Seeing the other comments, seems like it's pretty normal.

Dear Bleary-eyed in Chicago,

My son will be 7 months, he weighs 25lbs, and he has two bottom teeth.    At 3 mos he was sleeping through the nights until he starting getting his teeth.     He eats 10ozs of milk w/a little cereal in his bottle at night.     Sometimes he will drink 17ozs.      I let him drink until he is full and this bottle comes right after a nice warm bath at 7pm......every night!      He gets drowsy when I'm drying him off.   We do this routine the same time everyday.    By 8-8:30pm he is sleep and if he does sleep through the night he will wake at 5am. (some say that is good )  He may wake up once or twice and sometimes i let him cry and sometimes I take him down the hall to another room and put him back to sleep.      I am a first time mom and what i've learned is not to listen to everyones advice because every child is different!!     I just tell myself that as he gets older he "will" sleep through the nights......eventually.      Be patient and just know that your not the only "Bleary-eyed woman" out there.      I haven't slept in months,  but I know it will get better! : ) 

        Sherri- Deptford, NJ