I have a 19 month old granddaughter that her father has been in her life since she was born. My daughter and granddaughter live with my husband and I. My granddaughter does not want to go with her dad. She screams like crazy when he picks her up or when we take her to his house. He currently has her Sunday afternoon until Tuesday afternoon of every week - and this has been the situation for about six months. Her behavior has not gotten any better, only worse towards him. For example, one time when my husband got home, I said "daddy's home" and she got this horrified look on her face, started backing up, shaking her head and saying no-no, no-no. Last night he came to get her. When we opened the door and she saw him, she ran behind my kitchen island and then ran to me to pick her up. Then she just kept saying "elmo, elmo" wanting to watch her elmo dvd - which to me indicated that she felt if she watched elmo, then she would stay home. Her father made the statement, "gol, you act like you've never seen me before." Well, that's exactly how she appears, very frightened and very uncomfortable to go with him. Then when he picked her up to go with him, she was just very still in his arms. Once they got outside, she just started screaming. There are other times very similar things have occurred, but this will give a good feeling. But always when she goes with him, she screams for a long time. I am afraid that there's going to be long-term emotional trauma as a result of what she's going through.
I am searching for different options for some solutions. I do not want her father to be out of her life, but I am wanting my granddaughter to feel loved, safe and secure - which she obviously isn't feeling by going with her dad.
Any suggestions on what to suggest to him and my daughter? (My daughter is out of town this weekend on work training, I am tending, and that's why I'm writing this as I am very concerned about her.)
Thank you!
