Strollerderby : video games

Morning News - It's All Bill Clinton's Fault

Brett Singer — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 13:00:00 GMT

One current theme I've heard leaking out of the GOP Hive Mind lately is the idea that the Obama Administration needs to stop blaming the Bush Administration for, well, anything. For example: "I think people will be blaming George Bush until they die. We are almost halfway through the 1st year of Obama’s Presidency and they are still blaming the last administration for EVERYTHING. I think the blaming needs to stop and people need to start taking responsibility for their destinies."

Here's a little item from Business Week about the failures of the auto industry: "The Clinton Administration, as many before it, simply could not figure out how to force the Japanese to open their auto market, so in 1995 after a bout of highly publicized negotiations, it declared victory, even in the obvious face of failure. And the Clinton Administration was also unable to address the absence of a national health-care system. These two failures were huge, seen in retrospect."

So. Let's review. The Obama Administration and/or all Democrats need to stop blaming the Bush Administration because, you know, c'mon. It's been MONTHS since Obama took office. But blaming the Clinton Administration, which has been out of office for NINE YEARS, makes perfect sense. Yes, these articles are from two different sources. But the idea that nothing a former President did has any effect on our current situation is just silly. Thus endeth the opinion portion of Morning News.

Malls are in trouble, and therefore stocks in mall companies may not be a good buy right now, according to the Motley Fool (me, I know nothing about finance). To me, the problem with malls was always the excessive amount of useless stores. "I Can't Believe They Put A Clock In It!" That sort of thing. These are not stores that will survive in weak economic times. OK, that's opinion as well.

Funny item from Buzzfeed -- Ferris Bueller's best friend's house is up for sale. The house, located at 370 Beech Street in Highland Park, Illinois, can be yours for a mere $2,300,000. Four bedrooms, four baths, and the coolest garage ever to appear in a classic 1980's film. ("When Cameron was in Egypt land... Let my Cameron go...")

Dopey iPhone app of the day -- ShakeIt, which attempts to simulate the shaking that people used to do with Polaroids. As a commenter on Wired puts it: "That seems silly. Got any apps to add pops and hisses to my MP3 files?"

And also from Wired, news of a new Wii accessory that will monitor your heart rate while you get your Wii on. The Wii Vitality Sensor attaches to your WiiMote and will do more than just tell you your BPMs, according to Nintendo. “It intends to have you see the information relating to the inner world of your body, achieve greater relaxation." Or it could tell my son that he's waaay too into the game he's playing and needs to take a little break.

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Post-Hurricane Video Games Poison Kids

Miriam Axel-Lute — Wed, 27 May 2009 19:30:00 GMT

Hurricanes, of course, do plenty damage. And then there are the many dangers that follow that them, including carbon monoxide poisoning from poorly functioning/ventilated generators.

A creepy little report in the June issue of Pediatrics gives a new spin on this problem: Texas researchers note that in 75 percent of the cases of kids who were treated for carbon monoxide poisoning after Hurricane Ike, the generators that caused the poisoning were not being used to keep food fresh or run AC—they were being used to power video games.

I have many conflicting reactions to this.

At first, it almost seems like a joke: Hey look, video games can be blamed for something else!! Did you know they also cause blindness and hairy palms?

On the other hand: Wow. You're out of power entirely and you're going to use expensive fuel to run video games? That is a little hard to swallow. Of course, who am I to talk? Under such circumstances, if Internet connectivity were available, I would probably charge my laptop and run the modem if a generator were already running. Also, from a distance, it's probably easy to underestimate the value of a little familiar entertainment following a natural disaster. (And depending on the weather, video games probably use less power than AC would.)

Then again, if we need a clearer picture of how hard it is for us to wean ourselves and our kids off energy-consumptive habits, even for a little while, there it is.

(Sidenote: researchers suggested that school programs and text-message warnings to children's cell phones should be instituted as a response. No bad thing, but does that mean these kids are running the generators themselves with no oversight? I suppose many of them were teens, so probably, yes.)

Photo CC Rebecca Pollard, via Flickr.

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Lego Rock Band Video Game Announced

Brett Singer — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 03:00:00 GMT

People are excited by the news that a Lego Rock Band video game will hit stores soon.

PC World says that this new version of the popular pretend-to-be-a-rock-star game will likely be more "kid-friendly", which would fit nicely with previous versions of the Lego-whatever franchise.

The thing is, all of the Lego games haven't been hits. Lego Star Wars is a lot of fun and seems to be popular with every kid gamer I know. It's also the only game I know of where kids are likely to have more than one version of the same title, such as Nintendo Wii and also DS. Lego Batman is OK, but as far as I know it wasn't nearly as popular as Lego Star Wars. And Lego Indiana Jones didn't really catch on.

Lego Rock Band has a chance to be fun, but details are currently slim. PC World's Matt Peckham asks some reasonable questions: "How's the DS version going to work? Do you mean DS as in DS-original-only? Or DS-equals-original-DS-plus-new-DSi? How's the LEGO version supposed to be any more family friendly? Isn't the original already?" The latter I don't know if I agree with. Rock Band isn't exactly Halo, but it can be intimidating for a young game player.

Still, if Twitter is actually the bellweather that many technopundits believe it is, lots of folks will be buying the game as soon as it comes out. Lots of tweet-a-rific Lego Rock Band chatter today.

Source: PC World

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Retro Electronic Toys

Brett Singer — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 00:36:00 GMT

Sometimes I think I might be psychic. For example, right now, you are reading this blog post. And you think the joke I just made wasn't all that funny.

See what I mean?

Anyway, I was talking to my son the other day about the handheld electronics I used to play with. Then I'm online, reading my email, and in my gmail toolbar I see the title of a Wired.com article: "Forgotten Electronic Games."

Hmmm. Maybe Google is reading my brain waves. Wouldn't put it past them.

But enough about my psychic ability. (I know that you don't want to hear any more about it. You see? You see what I mean?) What did Wired dig up? Here are some highlights:

Big Trak: Man, did I want one of these. You could program it to move around and stuff! And it had a laser! Well, it was just a little light that flashed, but it made a cool noise.

Vectrex: Another one that I didn't actually own. This little gem was a self-contained gaming system, complete with a monitor that displayed vector graphics (hence the name). The system is still popular with some folks -- Wired points out that there are even new games being made. http://www.classicgamecreations.com/

Microvision: This I had. And I wish I still did. The Microvision was really the first Gameboy, albeit a technologically inferior version. The controls consisted of a dial and a squishy membrane that became various buttons depending on which cartridge was inserted. The screen was a series of black squares on a gray background. But at the time, it was the coolest thing around.

Merlin: It seemed like everyone had one of these, except for me. I didn't care for it but it was hugely popular. Lots of beeping and more than one game to play. It looked (and sounded) like a futuristic telephone from a movie made in 1979.

Not on the list are some of my personal faves, like the Pac-Man knockoff Epoch Man:

"It's not just a game! It's a digital clock, with a musical alarm!" Things were much simpler in the early 80's.

Bring back any memories?

Source: Wired.com

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Guitar Hero Camp

Brett Singer — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 19:00:00 GMT

Ah, summer camp. Log cabins. Bug juice. Video games.

Exsqueeze me?

Power Chord Academy, a company that runs mini-music camps for aspiring rockers, has added summer sessions featuring the popular game where kids pretend to play instruments. Why anyone thinks this is a good thing to have their kids do during the summer is beyond me. To be fair, the sessions are short, as in two or three days. That only adds to the head-scratcher quality of the enterprise for me, however.

Many have hailed Guitar Hero and Rock Band as fantastic gateways for kids to start learning how to play a musical instrument. I am not one of those people. I play guitar, and I've played Guitar Hero. It's different. I actually had some difficulty at first learning to "play" my "guitar" the way the game wanted me to rather than the way I would play an actual guitar. Why? Because it's different.

I do think that the game exposes kids to music that they would otherwise probably dismiss as "lame" or "for old people." Guitar Hero 3 includes music by Mountain, Social Distortion, Heart -- guitar rock. Even a song like "Sabotage" by The Beastie Boys, which shows up in Rock Band, is retro to these kids today. (These kids today. With their hippity-hop music, and that Justin Timberwolf...)

There's nothing wrong with the game. I've played it, it's kind of fun, and I'm sure if I was 10 I would enjoy it more than I do at...the age that I am. But sending kids to camp to play a video game? No way.

Image: Amazon

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How to Tell if Your Tot's Gonna Gamble

JeanneSager — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 21:26:00 GMT

Does your tot seem a tad impulsive? Take a cue from Kenny Rodgers - it might be time to let him know when to fold 'em, know when to hold 'em, know when to walk away . . .

OK, if he's impulsive, he probably has down running.

A new study says impulsive kindergartners are more likely to fall prey to gambling addictions when they age. In fact, the study says the problems start at the ripe old age of sixth grade.

Er, OK. And what does a sixth grade gambling addict look like? Is he up to his ears in I.O.U. used Nintendo game markers?

All joking aside, this is a serious study. Published in this month's issue of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine, the study follows one hundred sixty-three kids over a six-year time frame. When the kids were in kindergarten, their teachers were asked to rate their "inattentiveness, distractibility and hyperactivity" on a scale of one to nine. If nine is distractible, I'd have to rate any kindergartner I know an eight point six.

Six years later, when the kids were eleven, the researchers were back, asking them how often they played cards or bingo for money, bought lottery tickets, played video games or video poker for money, or bet on sports. The study took place in Canada, which should account for at least some minute differences. I don't see many American children being granted access to lottery tickets - the sole time I purchased a lottery ticket, I know I was carded (I was in my twenties).

As for betting on sports or playing cards for money - does that necessarily mean kids are on a highway to hell? We played poker for money in the back four seats of our bus in high school - almost every day. I had jars full of pennies in my room because I was adept at bluffing. Yet, I live a half hour from a video lottery gaming center, and I haven't gambled once. For that matter, none of the people I played WITH have gambling troubles today.

I understand adult gambling addiction is a real problem and clearly linked to impulse control. But what ever happened to letting kindergartners being kindergartners? Sure, they might throw crayons without thinking now, but twenty years from now, they might just know how to hold 'em.

Image: Triin

They Say: Kids REALLY Want Video Games They Can't Have

JeanneSager — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 16:01:00 GMT

And now for our non-news break of the day.

Dutch researchers have found that telling kids something isn't appropriate makes them want it more. Quick, alert Tipper Gore!

The study in this month's issue of Pediatrics shows the kids - aged seven to seventeen - clamored for "forbidden fruit," especially in relation to violent and mature-rated video games. Yes, as young as seven, these kids were lustfully sinful.

Weren't you? Heck, aren't you? The surest way to convince my three-year-old to start eating her veggies is to tell her she can't have anymore because they're just for Mommy and Daddy. Tell her she can't have candy, and she's in full puppy-dog-eyed- lower-lip-extended-mode.It's the same thing that makes Cadbury creme eggs taste sooooo good when you're on a diet.

So why would video games be any different? Or music? Or movies?

The trick is in convincing kids what they can have is the good stuff. In the immortal words of Mick Jagger, "You can't always gets what want, but if you try sometimes, you just mind find (you just might find) you get what you neeeeeed." Don't worry, the Stones pass the ratings test!

Image: Electronic House

Nintendo Scrabble Game Drops the F-Bomb

JeanneSager — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 14:31:00 GMT

First it was the word "tits." The Nintendo Scrabble game offered the eight-year-old boy two definitions: a garden bird or an informal word for female breasts. A garden variety mistake? Not when you consider the game's next choice.

Ethan Carrington's handheld Nintendo DS spit out the word "f**kers" to win at Nintendo Scrabble - the f-bomb was worth a triple word score.

Before giving birth to my daughter, this would have cracked me up (OK, it still did, but I promise I shook my head in appropriate disgust while clutching my stomach). The rating on the game was for three and up, and well, I have a three-year-old now. So you'll excuse me my prudishness in agreeing with Tonya Carrington - this game has got to go. The English mother bought the game for her son because he enjoys English; she thought it would boost his vocabulary. Only she was thinking more Webster's, less salty sea sailor.

The thing is, he's probably heard the words on the bus. But in a game Mom and Dad bought? One that's meant to act as a teaching tool?

The game's maker, Ubisoft, told the Daily Mail that there's a junior option that can be enacted to ensure curse words don't make their way through to little kids. Carrington says she looked through the game book and didn't see any mention of a junior version, but then again - should she have to look? When you market a game at kids three and up, you sort of expect it to BE the junior version, don't you? Besides the fact that this is Scrabble, the game that's got leagues of grannies meeting in their living rooms on Tuesday afternoons. Are you really surprised that most parents felt safe handing the game straight over to their kids withoutchecking to ensure it won't teach their kids that "toke" means to "draw on a cannabis cigarette?"

Image/Source: The Daily Mail

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Is Barack Obama Anti-Video Games?

Brett Singer — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 23:00:00 GMT

Not everyone is overjoyed that Barack Obama was elected the 44th President of the United States last week. (Was it only last week?)

Of course there are people who voted for John McCain. They're not too thrilled. But some hardcore video game players are concerned that our new President-elect may not be so friendly to their favorite pastime.

From the New York Times:

"Blog posts scoring Mr. Obama’s positions on video games have received hundreds of comments, with some readers worrying that his admonitions during the campaign to 'put the video games away' signaled new regulations or restrictions on the industry."

Here's what our new prez said:

"We’re going to have to parent better, and turn off the television set, and put the video games away, and instill a sense of excellence in our children."

Whoa. If that isn't a call to arms, I don't know what is.

In reality, I would imagine that Barack Obama is more likely than any other President to be friendly to the gaming industry as a whole. First of all, his campaign made extensive use of the Internet and other technological tools, including advertising in video games. Plus there is ample evidence that he is at least a little bit geeky. For example, he collects comic books, and made a pretty nerdy Superman reference at the Alfred E. Smith charity dinner (video is below):

In reality, I don't think any politician really wants to "ban" video games. Titles like Grand Theft Auto and other violent or sexually explicit games make "a convenient scapegoat", as the Times quotes a commenter from 1up.com. Just because a guy doesn't spend 12 hours blasting zombies every day doesn't mean he wants to stop other people from doing it. Besides, I think he might have one or two (or a hundred) more important things to worry about come January. Somewhat like the earlier concern that he had stopped telling supporters that he loved them, I think we might be expecting a little bit too much from the guy.

Source: New York Times, Image: Newser

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Roald Dahl's Widow Recalls His Childlike Sensibility

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 22:30:00 GMT

Felicity Dahl, the widow of the beloved children’s book author Roald Dahl, rarely gives interviews. 18 years after Dahl’s death, she finds it difficult to speak about her husband without crying. But in an interview with the Sunday Guardian, she spoke candidly about her husband's writing and personal life in order to publicize the inaugural Roald Dahl Funny Prize, which will be awarded to a humorous children’s book author on Thursday.

Felicity (pictured), won now runs the Roald Dahl Foundation, attributes Dahl’s popularity among kids not just to his humor, but to the fact that he treated children as his “equals,” never talking down to them or forgetting his own childlike wonder. He would drink pink milk for breakfast and constantly look for ways to surprise strangers with “treats,” such as buying all the nurses on his hospital floor new clothes in the last months of his life.

Dahl’s life was punctuated by tragedy. His sister and father died of unrelated illnesses within a month of each other when he was young, and his own daughter contracted a fatal illness many years later. But Felicity said he kept positive in large part by keeping his child’s mind alive and well. “He was always looking to help people and just make their day a little more interesting,” Felicity said, “because most people's days were very dull.”

Felicity is certain that Dahl would have been sorely disheartened by the advent of Game Boys and Nintendo Wiis that occupy so much of young people's free time these days. “I think [computer] games are absolutely appalling,” she said. “A child is never left on their own with nothing, so that they have to create their world.”

On the upside, one million of Dahl’s books continue to be sold each year.

Photo: Antonio Olmes/The Guardian

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Do Kids Really Need Tread Mills?

Shannon LC Cate — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 20:30:00 GMT

The new focus in our culture on childhood obesity has led to some interesting shifts in childhood itself, the most recent of which is club memberships for kids. The Chicago Tribune reports that:

"Fitness club memberships for youths age 6 to 17 have more than doubled in the past two decades, rising from 1.3 million in 1987 to 3.9 million in 2007. More than 1.3 million of those memberships were for children 6 to 11, according to the International Health, Racquet and Sportsclub Association."

One might think new concerns about sedentary kids would hurt the video game industry. Not so! They are on the edge of the professional kid fitness trend themselves, with products like Wii Fit, Nintendo's interactive exercise program and Gamercize, that makes video games work only when the player is moving.

The Tribune suggests that:

"Outdoor games such as hopscotch and tag that kept Baby Boomers fit when they were kids have largely fallen by the wayside. With busy family schedules and concerns about neighborhood safety weighing on parents' minds, many youths are more likely to play video games inside than ride a bike outside."

But I'm not 100% convinced. At $69-$125 per month for membership to a youth gym, I have to wonder how many parents can afford to budget the expense these days when there are perfectly good, free and reasonably safe playgrounds in most neighborhoods (certainly in neighborhoods in which residents can afford to contemplate kiddie gym memberships). I also have a hard time reconciling this "trend" with what we are told is another trend in bike-riding in times of expensive gasoline and concern about global warming.

What do you think? Does your kid go to a youth health club? Would you consider such a membership for a young child? What other (better?) ways do you get your kids moving?

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Online Husband Murdered By Bitter Ex

Kelly Mills — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 12:25:00 GMT

Nobody said marriage in an interactive game was easy. What do you do when your husband in "Maple Street" (similar to "Second Life") up and divorces you? Well, you are going to feel a whirlwind of emotions, and your fury and hurt might know no bounds. But of course, while you might contemplate murdering his avatar, would you go ahead and do it, thus taking a virtual life?

One woman in Japan answered yes to this. When her spouse in the game divorced her, she says "I was suddenly divorced, without a word of warning. That made me so angry." Murderously angry. She used the login and password she got from her hubby when they (virtually) married, and axed him. (She doesn't know the guy in real life.) She now faces a possible five years in prison and a fine of up to $5000 for manipulation of computer data and illegal access on a computer. Thank god they did not have any virtual children that I am aware of, because it's always worst for the child avatars.

I have an idea here. Maybe they should send her avatar to prison in the game, thus completing the cycle of wacky internet justice. She'd have to play out the rest of her online life in a small, virtual cell. Fitting, no?

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Missing Teen's Dad Blames Xbox Game Call of Duty

JeanneSager — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 19:02:00 GMT

Their son has been missing for more than a week, and Brandon Crisp's parents put the blame on Call of Duty, a military-style video game. Before the Canadian teenager took off, dad Steve and mom Angelika said they finally pulled the plug on his addiction.

They took his Xbox.

The 15-year-old Catholic high schooler took off on Tuesday, Oct. 14, and the Crisps have heard nothing from him, nor has he appeared in the online world where Call of Duty players meet to talk strategy and fight a virtual war, battling enemies with sniper rifles and machine guns, heavily armed jets and choppers. It's a game touted for its realistic look at warfare, giving players a chance to experience "tomorrow's warfare." It's also rated "M" for mature.

I don't actually have a problem with kids playing these video games. Studies as recent as last month have shown the kids who play video games are no more likely to turn into bad seeds than they are to be bedwetters. Video game addiction is very real, and I could see how easy it is for kids to replace the reality they experience outside of their bedrooms with the "reality" of the life inside a game system. Brandon's parents say he was reclusive, and didn't like to do anything physical. He fit the "loner in the basement hunched over a computer" stereotype of a typical Call of Duty player to a T. Outside of the house, the Crisps say they're afraid he won't be able to handle himself. Online, he has "friends" to back him up as he goes into make-believe battles. He doesn't need money or food or shelter from the cold - really any of the basics of every day life.

I don't blame them for taking away the Xbox to try to snap their kid back into reality. But can you really blame the game? The game doesn't say "play me, play me, sit on your ass all day." It's not the reason a kid has no survival skills at 15 and no desire to do anything physical.

Regardless, I feel for the Crisps. Not knowing where your child is for 24 hours is bad enough. More than a week? It makes me shiver.

Image: Amazon

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Video Gamers Find Obama in Xbox 360

JeanneSager — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 22:23:00 GMT

Thank you Barack Obama. I feel a little better knowing you're advertising your campaign in the middle of an Xbox 360 online racing game. Now I know I'm not the only video game widow out there - they're not just for kids anymore.

A billboard alongside the roadway in Electronic Arts' Burnout Paradise racing game promotes Obama's Vote For Change Website, and urges early voting. Electronic Arts confirmed to GigaOm that it is a paid advertisement, stating the company accepts ads from "credible political candidates." Sounds like a bit of an oxy moron to me, but what the hey.

I'd say Obama's credible enough to believe - if he's shooting for the over-18 able-to-vote crowd, I guess I have to stop telling my husband he should be leaving the video games to the kids.

Image: Newser

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Learning to Read through Video Games

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 22:30:00 GMT

Increasingly, books for children and young adults are being released with related video games. Since 97 percent of children ages 12 to 17 play computer and video games, this seems like a surefire to draw at least some reluctant readers into books. But when libraries host gaming tournaments and elementary schools incorporate video games into English lessons, you have to wonder, “Is this still reading?”

A large number of writers, publicists, and educators believe it is—and that, in the age of digital media, computer skills may be more important than proficiency with print media.

PJ Haarsma is a former advertising consultant who now designs online games about his science fiction novels for preteens. He argues that pairing video games with young adult literature “brings the book into their world, as opposed to going the other way around.”

But, as I pointed out in my tribute to Roald Dahl, the mark of a good book is precisely the ability to get lost in it, to live inside a world of which one has no experiential knowledge. This is particularly important for children, who largely learn empathy, respect for the imagination, and the value of introspection through reading. When one is being tested about a book’s plot in order to advance in a video game, the quiet, self-forgetful pleasure of being lost in a good book gets obliterated completely. Children learn that the only character who matters is the one holding the controller.

Photo: New York Times

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Grand Theft Auto player saves family

Brett Singer — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 13:00:00 GMT

That whole "video games are bad" thing took a hit last week when an 11 year old girl named Audrey Plique helped her family get out of the family car after it rolled over on the highway. How did she know what to do in a situation like that? From playing "Grand Theft Auto."

Click on "source" below for the full story, but here are the basics: the driver, Audrey's dad, felt lightheaded and their Jeep went off the road. The vehicle, "struck a guardrail and flipped four times before coming to rest on its side in the ditch. The roof of the vehicle caved in and the back window broke out." Audrey got the family out in time: "She just knew, from playing 'Grand Theft Auto.' She saw on there that when a car rolls over, it can blow up," her mother said.

Everybody survived; only the father had serious injuries, but he is expected to recover.

Now, since I'm not insane, I don't actually think that "Grand Theft Auto" saved this family's life. That said, playing GTA also doesn't make you a killer. Good for Audrey. She should fight crime when she grows up.

Source/image: mywebtimes

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Teen Drops Out of School to Play Guitar Hero

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 20:15:00 GMT

Many parents of gifted children allow their kids to take time off of school to pursue their artistic or athletic vocation. But what if that vocation is playing video games?

Meet Blake Peebles, a 16-year-old from Raleigh, North Carolina who is one of the best Guitar Hero players in the country—meaning, he has a rare talent for pressing buttons on a toy guitar hooked up to a TV screen. Last September, Blake’s parents finally gave in to his repeated requests to drop out of high school and focus on what he loves. Now, instead of attending high school, Blake studies with a private tutor—and puts in long hours with his Nintendo, PlayStation, and Xbox.

But this is not all fun and games. Blakes hopes to turn his gaming abilities into a lucrative career. Players signed by Major League Gaming (no, I'm not making this up) earn as much as $80,000 a year competing in tournaments.

So far, Blake has won around $1,000—but that money came in the form of gift certificates, gaming equipment, and Chick Fil-A combo meals. He hopes to start bringing in some actual cash after his father takes him to the U.S. regionals of the World Cyber Games.

Concerned family and friends have been quick to condemn the Peebles' decision. But Blake's parents have watched his work ethic and grades improve under a private tutor, and most importantly, they say that Blake is now happy. “I wasn’t really good at anything else that I liked,” he says. Still, the fact remains that being good at Guitar Hero means staying up till 4 a.m. staring at a TV screen.

Do you think the Peebles should have forced Blake to remain in school? Or were they right to trust their son to know what was best for him?

Photo: The News and Observer/Corey Lowenstein

5 reasons it's a good thing I had boys

Brett Singer — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 17:05:00 GMT

I was going to say, "I'm glad I have boys" but that didn't sound quite right. That is, I would love girl-children just as much as I love my guys. But there are a few ways that having boys has made my life – mine, specifically – a little bit easier.

1. No pink ponies: It doesn't seem like having a Y chromosome should automatically mean that one is interested in superheroes, videogames, and action figures inspired by superheroes and videogames. But experience says otherwise. While there are definitely girls who love trucks and boys who follow the Frasier and Niles Crane path – a love of opera, Broadway and snappy clothing – my guys are way into Spider-Man, Batman, Superman, Pokémon, Wii, Playstation 2, and so on. If I had to learn whatever there is to know about My Little Pony, I think my brain would crawl out of my ear.

2. Miley-free zone: Thus far Things 1 and 2 have shown zero interest in Billy Ray Cyrus' little ~~meal ticket~~ girl, which means I can continue to go through life knowing almost nothing about her. Maybe this will change when they get older, but hopefully by then Miley Ray Hannah Montana Stewart Cyrus will have either pulled a Britney Spears and had a meltdown, grown up and started singing jazz standards, or retired to spend her days sitting on a giant pile of cash gazing longingly at Nick Jonas. OK, I guess I sort of know something about her, but that's just from trying to keep up with pop culture. I have nothing against Miley or the Jonases, but not having to listen to their music or attend their concerts is something I will never, ever complain about.

3. No batting of eyelashes: My wife has pointed out many times that if we had had girls, odds are I would be putty in their hands. I wish I could say I disagree but I think she's probably right. Little girls are so cute, and seeing them cry is much more painful than seeing boys cry. I know that's stupid, sexist, and stupid (did I say that one already?). But I've seen, more than once, little girls who lead their dads around by the nose. It's probably best if we never find out whether or not I would join their ranks.

4. Less irrational over-protectiveness: Again, I am fully aware that this is unfair, stupid and sexist. But if I had girl-children, I would be very tempted not to let them leave the house until they were 30. I guess going to school would be OK, as long as they dressed like those Mormon sect people.

5. No High School Musical: When this monstrosity first started airing on the Disney Channel and the CD went to number one, I tried to watch it out of curiosity. I made it through about 15 minutes before I realized that it would probably be more fun to chew glass. The songs are lame, the characters are dull, the story is… Feh. Anyway, the boys seem immune to whatever charms that thing has, and for that, I am grateful.

image: Amazon.com

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Sarah Silverman says: make granny vote for Obama

Palin should read Internet for Dummies

Stuff my 3 year old broke

More stuff my 3 year old broke

Dad arrested for leaving son at McDonald's

Red eye? Nope, eye cancer

Creepiest spam message ever: "we have hijacked your baby"

Lego Metallica

11 months old, 62 pounds

Babies R Us tells breastfeeding mother to get out

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Shawn Johnson more mature than her coach

Shawn Johnson, Democrat? (UPDATE: Now with video)

RetroFitted: Can Space Invaders Stage a Comeback?

Jen Chaney — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:34:00 GMT

Before there was Super Mario or The Sims -- hell, before there was even Pac-Man -- there was Space Invaders, the 1978 video game that gave us all the ability to shoot freaky buggers from outer space while sitting in the comfort of our own living rooms. It was so popular, even the British fell in love with it (by the way, I love that Super Breakout is characterized as "educational" in this commercial):

Like all wonderful things from the '70s and '80s, Space Invaders is getting revamped for this millennium. Specifically, the game was re-released last month as Space Invaders Extreme. "Extreme" -- that makes it sound so daring, so high-octane, so Vans Warped Tour, doesn't it?

Turns out all that means is that the basic Invaders concept has gotten a little flashier: cooler lasers, room for multiple players, etc. So far, several reviewers -- including Clive Thompson at Wired -- have lavished high praise on the new version, which is available on the Nintendo DS and PSP. (Why not for the Wii? Why????)

The reason for the accolades: Space Invaders Extreme stays true to its original concept and doesn't try to get too elaborate. Here's my feeling about video games: For the most part, I should be able to understand the premise in a sentence. Pac-Man: You eat pellets and run away from monsters. Cool. Space Invaders: You shoot at aliens, who keep coming at you faster and faster, so you keep shooting. Excellent. I get that. It's games that go like this -- "Well, first you have to capture the golden orb, which gives you extra lifelines, at which point you advance to Level Supremus, then you try to capture the super-secret sword" -- that lose me. I don't have time for that. Just let me take 10 minutes after dinnertime and before bed to shoot a few extra-terrestrials and then I'll take the check, thanks.

Long story short, Space Invaders worked in 1978 because its premise was fun, compelling and classic. It will work in 2008 for those same reasons. Now, for the love of God, just make it for the Wii.

RetroFitted appears every Thursday on Strollerderby.

They Say: Limit Kids Screen Time

Brett Singer — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 14:00:00 GMT

What's great about "advice" is that, in trying to be many things to many people, it often comes out sounding unintentionally dopey.

From About.com's singleparents site (I guess kids in two-parent families can watch as much TV as they want to?) comes these tidbits:

"The American Academy of Pediatrics has some pretty strict guidelines for children's television viewing." What are these "strict" guidelines? Limiting the TV viewing of children younger than 2 years old to two hours per day, and not putting a TV in your kids' bedrooms.

Do you think those are "some pretty stringent guidelines"? I admit that we let our son play his Nintendo DS in his room sometimes, but no TV in his room is not even an issue. I was allowed to get a TV in my room when I was old enough to pay for it myself (hello, Bar Mitzvah cash.)

Then we get to the advice on how to actually limit viewing hours.

- "Don't use the TV as background noise. Only have it on if someone is sitting down watching a specific program." Good advice in general, frankly.

- "If you have TiVo or a DVR, record a few of your child's favorite shows and allow him or her to view them at specific times during the week. Once they've been watched, delete them from the recording device." Clearly these people don't have children, or if they do, they don't have TiVo. In my experience, kids want to watch the same things over and over again. Not necessarily right away, but there are definitely repeat viewings of favorite shows. If we only watched everything once, why do so many folks buy DVDs?

- "Avoid using TV for winding down. Instead, read a book together or allow your child to listen to an audio book." Again, reasonable advice.

- "Provide a TV viewing chart for your children, and teach them to plan out the shows they'd like to watch during the week." This one seems weird to me. Isn't this sending a message that television is so important it needs to be scheduled as an important part of your week? Admittedly, we've been spoiled by having TiVo for the kids' entire lives, so planning is a non-issue (as are commercials.)

- "Finally, choose your child's television programs carefully, and take the time to preview shows together. Talk about what you like about certain shows, and what gives you caution about the shows you do not care for." I'll take this a step further and say that you can and should watch shows with the little ones, especially once they get old enough to understand what the hell they are watching. For example, there's an episode of "The Brady Bunch" where Mike tells Carol, "If I caught one of my sons playing with a doll house, I'd send him to a psychiatrist." My mother was right there to point out the sexism of that line.

How important is the TV in your house? Any "strategies" for reducing screen time, or do you just shut the damn thing off?

image: Pegmurphy.com

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Weekly Check-Up: Wii Fit Gets Pumped

Kelly Mills — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 12:31:00 GMT

In case you haven't heard, Wii Fit is going to be released next month, and it's already a huge hit in Japan, according to CNN. Is it going to replace the exercise video and save our children from obesity? Well, it's being touted as the next big thing in part because it has a sensor-riddled balance board that tracks and analyzes your movements. It will assess your fitness using your Body Mass Index (BMI--a measure I despise, BTW) and then it will run you through some drills to see how you do. After that, you can choose from a bunch of games focusing on strength training, aerobics, balance games and yoga. Wii Fit will also track your progress over time.

Now maybe it's just me, but that article sounds more like a press release than reporting. I have no idea if Wii Fit is any good, and as someone who actually likes playing video games, I imagine I'll find out, and who knows, I might love it. I know early versions of the boxing minus the balance board were kinda crappy, and not much like actual boxing. That might not matter if your goal is just doing some physical activity, but I'd rather go live and get actual skills on some things. I also wonder if the board is going to be enough to assess things like proper form, crucial for avoiding injury. However, if you do a workout video or crowded class, you probably aren't getting that instruction anyway, so that's nothing unique to the Wii. As with anything and everything fitness-y, if it helps you engage in consistent and regular physical activity, then it's probably gonna be a good thing for you.

Puff the Magic Bully Stopper

Brett Singer — Fri, 04 Apr 2008 15:15:00 GMT

Peter Yarrow (one-third of Peter Paul and Mary) is doing his part to stop bullying in schools with Operation Respect (click for a video report from WNBC in New York).

This isn't some dopey updating of PPM tunes (although I admit I wouldn't mind hearing, "If I had a hammer / I'd use it on a bully...") Unlike some child-oriented non-profits, Operation Respect actually seems to do something. McGraw-Hill is distributing, free of charge, a program that OR developed called Don't Laugh At Me, which includes videos, classroom activities and yes, songs written and sung by Yarrow. The materials have been translated into several languages, including Croatian, Hebrew and Arabic. Yarrow says in the WNBC interview that over 22,000 copies have been distributed worldwide.

Educators can visit OR's website to order the free package of materials.

image: WNBC.com

Nintendo Parenting Tips

Amy Kuras — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 21:33:00 GMT

One of the conundrums of new parenthood is what exactly to do with this little person. I mean, little babies don't exactly do much. As far as older babies and toddlers, geez, there's only so much peek-a-boo a person can play, you know?

The answer, my friends, is in a video game. Not playing one with your very young children, mind you, using one.

There's a game for the handheld Nintendo DS called Sukusuku Kosodate DS, or Sukusuku Parenting DS that offers parents a whopping 176 suggestions of games to play with your young child.

Okay, it's in Japanese, and some of the suggestions are just very bad. Like, this bad. Like putting a sheet over you so you look like a ghost and chasing your child around the house (shown in the picture here). And um, based on the link I clicked through Siliconera, it's exclusively in Japanese. Which I neither read or speak, so my apologies if this is some overdue April Fool's joke or something.

One part of this that does sound cool – there is a database of children's songs included, and a place to jot down things you want to remember about parenthood. Maybe that I would use instead of the neglected "baby journal" someone gave me and hasn't seen a word about my son yet.

A Video Game That Refuses to Acknowledge Your Sucky Dance Moves

Jen Chaney — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 15:32:00 GMT

Perhaps you have heard of "Dance Praise," a video game in the spirit of "Dance Dance Revolution," but with Christian music and no negative vibes. That's right -- if you mess up a step, the game won't snicker at you or boo. Do the worst version of the Cabbage Patch in the history of mankind, and "Dance Praise" will still love you.

Evidently the game, created by Christian company Digital Praise, has sold well enough to spawn a follow-up, "Dance Praise 2: The Remix." This video guide -- featuring a lot of people who make the white man's overbite look postively gangsta -- explains the whole concept, but doesn't address one important question: What's wrong with a little light-hearted negative feedback?

I understand why religious families dig on the Christian messages. If that appeals to you, that's totally fine. But the notion that the game should be celebrated because it won't damage a child's self-image, as a press release recently sent to Strollerderby suggests, seems a little goofy. Obviously we should not go up to our kids and say, "You know something? You couldn't find you way to Funkytown with a GPS system and a detailed roadmap." But I think we sometimes tiptoe too gingerly around the whole notion of self-esteem.

Sometimes hearing "You suck," again, in a non-threatening context, can actually be motivating. When I was a kid, my brother had this funny little habit. Every time the song "Lonesome Loser" by the Little River Band came on the radio, he would sing it to me and -- in a way that even now just makes me want to punch someone in the nose -- point his finger in my face every time the lyric "loser" was sung. I hated him in those moments. I also hated the Little River Band for singing the stupid song, and Q107 for playing it in the first place.

But in a way, it motivated me. It made me think: "So I'm a loser? Oh, just wait until the next time we play whiffleball. We'll see how much of a loser I am when I keep hitting shots into the neighbor's yard and forcing you to go get them. We'll just see who gets beaten by the queen of hearts every time THEN."

The folks behind "Dance Praise" undoubtedly mean well. And I'm sure many families, both Christian and non, will enjoy grooving together in front of their PCs without fear of reprisal. But I say there's nothing wrong with a kid getting a big, 'ol finger in the face every once in a while, just to keep stoking that fire inside.

Photo: Kidzonearth.com

Bullying Makes The Front Page

Brett Singer — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:29:00 GMT

The New York Times put Dan Barry's Monday column on the front page, which would indicate that someone at the paper of record thinks that bullying is a big deal. This particular story is pretty horrible: apparently Billy Wolfe of Fayetteville, Arkansas has been getting regular beatdowns for the past three years, sometimes so bad that he required medical attention.

Although I agree with this blogger that Barry's article doesn't try to show two sides of the story, it's clear that Billy is a target for repeated abuse. The article opens with a description of two students driving up to where Billy is waiting for the school bus, hitting him, and filming the incident with a cellphone camcorder. Ugly, ugly stuff.

What's most disturbing is the reported reactions from school officials. After Billy had to have his cheek sewn up by a dentist after being hit so hard in wood shop that he was briefly unconscious, one official said that, "it looked like Billy got what he deserved" and declined to call the police. Another school official says "Billy and the boy who punched him at the bus stop had exchanged words and shoves a few days earlier."

Somewhat like the "but he called me fat" defense, this doesn't exactly hold water. Do these "school officials" think that knocking someone unconscious is the appropriate response to a verbal fight, or even a physical one? Am I just an East Coast wussy who doesn't think it's acceptable for students to fight until they draw blood?

Billy's parents have filed a lawsuit against the students. One is named (Ian Teeters) and the others are "John Does." There was also some cyberbullying going on; a Facebook page was set up specifically to taunt Billy. This could be significant since cyberbullying is against state law. While I sympathize with the parents, I do think that suing his fellow students isn't likely to make Billy less of a target.

Lots of blogging about this of course, and Jess and Josh Talk About Stuff pointed me to this article from London's Daily Mail. The title, Coping with the bullies 'is part of growing up', says child expert, is enough to make your head explode, but the actual details are less wacko. If it is indeed true that "a child in Kent was arrested for throwing a slice of cucumber from a tuna sandwich at a classmate," then yes, that was a bit much. Unfortunately, it's too easy for some folks to classify any and all fighting as "boys will be boys." The Macho Response has a slightly different take. The blogger adds a little bit of text to the Times article: "So one day Billy walked into wood shop, picked up a two-by-four..." That's one option.

Maybe the bullies are just playing too many videogames.

image: New York Times