Strollerderby : steal

Dad Steals for Diaper Money

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:00:00 GMT

An Illinois father has apparently seen the movie Raising Arizona one too many times. After robbing a couple at gunpoint in their home, 21-year-old Jeffrey Humphrey made off with $108, but never had a chance to use it.

Three hours after the burglary, police found Humphrey at his home, less than half a mile from the scene of the crime, with a $100 bill in his pocket. On second thought, maybe he needs to bone up on his heist movies….

Humphrey admitted to the robbery and told detectives that he needed the money to pay for diapers for his infant. According to the Southtown Star, “The $108 stolen would pay for about 350 diapers, enough to last about five weeks for the average newborn.” That’s assuming, of course, that he wasn’t planning to buy cloth, which would have given him much more bang for his embezzled buck.

For five weeks of diapers that he never even bought, Humphrey could be locked up for as long as 30 years.

Photo: ugo.com

7-Year-Old Steals Grandma's Car, Becomes Hero

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 12:00:00 GMT

You may remember Latarian Milton, the seven-year-old who stole the keys to his grandma’s SUV and took it for a joyride with his friend because “it’s fun to do bad things, like drive into a car?” (He did, in fact, drive into several cars on his joyride.)

Well, just in case Latarian’s grandmother didn’t teach Latarian right and wrong with her violent threats—“If I thought they wouldn’t take me to jail, I’d whip his behind,” she said—Latarian has now become a sort of star for his bad ass ways. This recent radio interview starts with the interviewers telling Latarian that they are big fans of his. When they ask if people stop him and ask for his autograph, he says, "I'm a celebrity."

So basically Latarian has learned that acting out in potentially lethal ways makes you cool, and that violence is a great way to express your anger, so long as you don’t get caught.

Photo: ecoustics.com

After Miscarriage, Woman Paid $1,000 For a Baby

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:30:00 GMT

This is perhaps the most bizarre tale of child endangerment that you’ll ever read—and, thank God, the baby involved is unharmed, though in need of loving parents.

A Pennsylvania woman named Andrea Curry-Demus called paramedics last week and said she had just given birth prematurely. She was rushed to the hospital with an infant whose umbilical cord was still attached. Doctors were immediately suspicious of the woman’s story since the baby appeared to be full-term. After examining Curry-Demus, they determined that she had not given birth and called the police. Blood and hormone tests later revealed that Curry-Demus is not the baby’s mother.

The 38-year-old woman told police that she had a miscarriage in June, but she didn’t want to disappoint her mother by telling her the truth. So she befriended a pregnant woman named Tina, and arranged to give Tina $1,000 for her baby. According to Curry-Demus, Tina showed up at her apartment carrying the newborn, with the umbilical cord still attached. That's when Curry-Demus called an ambulance.

The healthy baby remains at the hospital while police try to identify who the birth mother is. Curry-Demus, who faces charges of endangering the welfare of a child, claims she's done nothing wrong.

Photo: totalbabyguide.com

Update:

Body Found in Curry-Demus' Apartment

Pregnant Woman Apprehends a Thief

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 12:00:00 GMT

The first thing 32-year-old Nadine Bevis did after she found out that she was pregnant was—stop a knife-wielding thief. Perhaps pregnancy hormones contain some crime busting agents.

Driving home from the doctor’s office, Bevis saw a man grab a boy’s bike. She immediately pulled over, got out of the car, and rushed toward the would-be thief. Even though the man was carrying two knives, Bevis was too pissed to be scared. “I can still see the boy’s poor little face,” she said. “He couldn’t catch his breath he was crying so much.”

Bevis blocked the assailant’s path, said, “Smile for the camera,” and snapped a photo of the man, named John King. Two other passersby then tackled the man to the ground, disarming him and restraining him until police arrived. King has admitted to the robbery and now faces a lengthy prison sentence.

The 14-year-old victim, who was very shaken up by the attempted theft, has said that he hopes he gets a chance to thank his real-life guardian angels in person.

Although Bevis realizes she was putting herself in danger, she has no regrets about intervening. “Too many people stand by and let this happen—I wasn’t going to be one of them,” she said. “Otherwise thugs will think they can get away with it.”

Not if there are any expectant mothers around, they won’t.

Image: Flickr