Strollerderby : robin williams

Family Movie Night – Happy Feet

Brett Singer — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 20:30:00 GMT

I'm particularly glad to have a chance to write something about this one. While it certainly has its flaws, there are some parts that are terrific.

"Happy Feet" is about a bunch of penguins. According to the movie, each penguin has a "heart song" that develops over time; by singing it, the non-flying birds mate, make more non-flying birds, and life goes on. Mumble, though, is different. When he sings, he sounds like a cross between an elephant seal and fingernails being dragged across a chalkboard. He can, however, do a mean tap dance (the incomparable Savion Glover provides the audio for his fancy footwork). This does not endear him to the tribe, and even his parents would rather he be somewhere else. So, like Rudolph before him, he leaves, eventually meeting up with a group of Hispanic penguins (more on this later), and going on a journey to find out why there aren't as many fish to eat as there once were.

By far the best aspect of "Happy Feet" is the music. It came out in 2006, and by that point the novelty of the "mash-up" trend in music had peaked in popularity. The tunes here aren't original, but the songs chosen, and the arrangements used, are so clever that I was mesmerized. The opening number features Prince's "Kiss", blended together with Elvis' "Heartbreak Hotel", with little musical quotations from Salt N' Pepa ("Let's talk about eggs, bay-bee" – slight lyric change there), Lionel Richie ("Hello"), and even Mr. Mister ("Broken Wings"). If that sounds horrible, give it a try, because in my opinion it works. The animation is also top-notch, almost on a level with Pixar's. This also means that the scarier parts (killer whale attacks, elephant seals, and so on) are that much more frightening, but neither of my kids seemed to mind.

This film generated a ton of controversy from the conservative quarters of the country because of its extremely blunt pro-environment message. While I personally agree with what they were saying, it does get very heavy-handed towards the end of the film, and inserting actual humans is strange, although I have to admit that it is effective. If you look at some of the user reviews on Amazon, there are various complaints that this is not a "happy" film at all. That's not entirely without merit; one character almost chokes to death on plastic soda rings, and there are those icy predators that always seem ready to munch on Mumble and his pals. But again, the proof is in the kids, and both of my boys were fine with the "less happy" parts.

Speaking of those pals, I'm always a little bit surprised about the way certain races are portrayed in animated movies aimed at children. In this case, Mumble hooks up with a group of short penguins who like to whistle at girls ("Ay, mami!") and speak with thick Hispanic accents. He calls them "the amigos" in case anyone misses the joke. Their leader, Ramon, is played by Robin Williams, who also plays a Barry White-style penguin who sits atop a tower of pebbles dispensing advice. Not to be overly politically correct, but this sort of thing happens all the time: the Black and Hispanic hyenas in "The Lion King" are another example (and of course, there are all of these). It's not enough to un-recommend the movie but it's worth mentioning. I'm also not a big Robin Williams fan, but I know other people can't get enough of him. Having him play two somewhat racially insensitive characters in one film is almost too much, but the animation, music and tap dancing more than make up for it (I'm a big Savion Glover fan).

Bottom line: some truly great moments (the music, animation and tapping) offset some weird ones (the ultra-heavy-handed environmental message). Recommended, unless your political sensibilities run heavily to the right, in which case this film will probably make your head explode.

image: Amazon.com

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Five Forgotten Fictional Fathers

Brett Singer — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 15:00:00 GMT

OK, "forgotten" is a little strong. But while we are all familiar with Darth, Homer and the rest, here are some other unreal dads that deserve a mention on Father's Day. Not all are great dads; some are pretty damn bad. Most just don't make it onto the usual "best/worst dad" lists. Here you go, on Father's Day, in no particular order:

1. Jock Ewing, "Dallas", played by Jim Davis

OK, maybe it's not in any particular order, but was there ever a tougher TV dad than Jock Ewing? As The Onion's AV Club puts it, "[Jock's] sons Bobby and J.R….have absorbed his good and evil sides, respectively, and are used by their deceptively benign father to consolidate his power." He also had an illegitimate son, Ray Krebbs, who worked on Ewing's Southfork ranch; this wasn't revealed until after Ray had been working there for a couple of years. Which means that Jock hired his own son to work on his ranch but didn't tell him that he was his father. Go ahead. Find me something better than that. Davis' portrayal of Jock was so iconic that when the actor died, he was not replaced; they killed the character and put a portrait of the Ewing patriarch in the family dining room where he could continue to exert his will from beyond the grave. Here's a clip of Jock tossing out ten grand like it was ten cents in order to "purchase" Bobby's wife Pamela (Victoria Principal) from her father, Digger Barnes.

2. "Man", played by Antonio Banderas, in "Four Rooms"

Banderas doesn't get a name in this segment of the largely forgotten hotel comedy. He plays a gangster of some sort who pays off the bellhop (Tim Roth, currently appearing in "The Incredible Hulk") to watch his offspring while he and the missus go out and celebrate New Year's Eve. When he looks at his children and demands, in full Antonio-accented English, "Don't misbehave," you know that they will. Video clip below, not remotely safe for work or family-viewing. (Banderas also gets a nod for Gregorio Cortez in the three "Spy Kids" movies.)

"Four Rooms" Video clip (Not Work-Safe)

3. Mork from Ork, played by Robin Williams

You probably forgot that Mork was a dad. In a desperate attempt to save the weird "Happy Days" spin-off, Jonathan Winters signed on to play Mearth, Mork and Mindy's son. Of course, Orkans are born old and age backwards. It wasn't much funnier than it sounded. Now that I’m a parent myself, I have to say that I don't think I'd want things to work that way. Not that changing diapers is fun, but it's definitely easier to do it when the kid is smaller than you.

4. Wayne Szalinski, "Honey I Shrunk the Kids", played by Rick Moranis

Fathers in movies and television are often portrayed as bumbling fools who fall to pieces in the parenting department as soon as mommy leaves for five minutes. This guy, however, actually manages to shrink his children to microscopic size when left to his own devices. The character was slammed back in 1997 by Dr. Helen Haste of the British Association for the Advancement of Science, who took issue with the way that, " writers and directors employ stereotypes for almost every scientist seen on film and television."

5. Michael Kyle, "My Wife and Kids", played by Damon Wayans

This ABC sitcom ran for five seasons, which is certainly respectable. But it never quite caught on with audiences the way "Everybody Loves Raymond" did. One reason could be that the parents were, at times, intentionally not 100% nice to their children. For example, in the episode "The Grassy Knoll", mom and dad discover that Michael Jr. is stoned. So they decide to mess with his head. (The only clip I could find was in Spanish, so you'll have to just take my word for it that it was funny. Unless, of course, you speak Spanish.) It was a silly show, but there was something very realistic in the way Michael dealt with his son. It wasn't perfect, and it wasn't always behavior you wanted to emulate. But it was usually pretty funny.

Here is a clip from "Junior Gets his License".

There are, of course, many more. Who are your favorites, forgotten or otherwise?

Oh yeah -- happy father's day!

images: Amazon.com, timstvshowcase.com, mrsjrewing.tripod.com, wjzy.com

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5 Totally Unrealistic Birth Scenes

editors — Tue, 13 May 2008 16:37:00 GMT

None of us need a repeat of the crowning glory that was Knocked Up, but hopefully KU will inspire future filmmakers to at least make the birth scene less contrived, if not anatomically correct. Five that represent the extreme of the silver screen - April Peveteaux

1. Look Who’s Talking, 1989

Highlight of birth scene: weird plastic doll sees tracers after mom is dosed with pain meds. But somehow watching the whole thing in French makes it more palpable…

2. She’s Having a Baby, 1988

Apparently in 1988 breech babies were life-threatening and husbands were still getting kicked out of the delivery room.

3. Rosemary’s Baby, 1968

One would just think it might be much more painful spawning the son of Satan.

4. Freddy Got Fingered, 2001

Tom Green delivers a baby in thirty-eight seconds then bites off the umbilical cord. A lack of hilarity ensues.

5. Nine Months, 1995

In which we witness the "full moon" factor, video camera antics by husbands behaving badly and synchronized cervix dilation.