Strollerderby : reality t.v.

My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad (aka American Dad-iators)

makeitadouble — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 21:00:00 GMT

Since the dawn of man children have pitted their fathers against each other in imaginary cage matches of strength, speed, agility and intelligence. “My father can kill a wooly mammoth with his bare hands.” “Yeah we’ll my father’s cranial capacity is like 1200 cubic centimeters.” “No Way!” “Yes Way!”

Now with the help of the Maharishi of Reality TV Mark Burnett, who brought us such appointment television as Pirate Master and Commando Nanny, NBC is doing what tar pit and school yard disputes could never do and that is match fathers against each other in an actual competition that will finally settle the debate of whose dad is better.

Premiering on February 18th "My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad" will be a series featuring four dads teamed up with their boastful offspring competing against other in contests that will challenge dad’s strength, smarts and ability to work as a team with his son or daughter.

Mimbo and father of two Dan Cortese, who hasn’t had a regular gig since Veronica's Closet, has been tagged to host what I am already calling American Dad-iators (Pause Dictation: Phyllis, please copyright American Dad-iators and then contact Fox Network about a possible rip-off to air this summer).

Not only is there a possible $50,000 grand prize at stake, but more importantly for the kids are the bragging rights to say that their Dad is better than, well, those other three dads.

Dad-iators ready? READY!

Wooly Mammoth ready? (LOUD WOOLY MAMMOTH SOUND!)

3-2-1….WHISTLE!

(photocredit:www.collider.com)

Hold Me Closer, Tiny Dancer

Adrienne Martini — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 15:00:00 GMT

Like cockroaches and Cher, reality television will always survive. Writers' strike? Reality TV laughs at your writers' strike. Ready for the latest twist?

Cable channel Lifetime plans to cash in on the Dancing With The Stars craze by producing Your Mama Don't Dance. Professional ballroom dancers will reach their non-dancing parents how to cut a rug.

Since this is reality tv, the dancer/contestants weren't told in advance who they'd be teaching. The hope is that these pairs will provide plenty of drama. "It's going to be an emotional show. I want people to cry," Lifetime Entertainment's Susanne Daniels said.

No word yet on when the companion show And Your Daddy Don't Rock 'n' Roll will be produced.

"Today" Show to Air Segment About Two-Dad Family

Erin White — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 20:05:00 GMT

It seems that little Angelica isn't the only child of divorced gay parents who is getting airtime this January. In the coming weeks the "Today" show plans to run a segment about the life of eleven year-old Henry Terry, who has two dads. The segment isn't just your run-of-the-mill heavily edited and mildly inspirational feature. It is one of three installments of "Through Innocent Eyes," in which children are given video cameras and asked to document their family life. And Henry has lots to document. His family consists of two dads and four sons living in two different states (Henry lives with his dad and one of his brothers in Marietta, GA).

Despite being warned that his family wouldn't fit into the "gay family prototype" (I'd love to hear what exactly this prototype consists of) Henry's dad, Ted Persky, responded to an NBC request for a gay/lesbian family's participation and his story immediately peaked the interest of the show's producers.

So then, hats off to NBC. Hats off to Henry and his family, who were willing to let the world peek inside their complex and hectic life. But before those hats go flying, I have to share a quote from the shows producer that has me just the teeny tiniest bit irked:

"They’re [Henry's family] a family that’s complicated, flawed, loving and constantly trying to be just like traditional families,” said Sabrina Clay, a "Today" show producer. Constantly trying to be just like traditional families? Really? My guess is that they are constantly trying to keep their children safe and relatively happy while managing a long-distance divorce and that the idea of being like "traditional families" couldn't be further from their minds. Let's pack up the traditional family (and all references to it) and stick it in the attic with those Christmas dishes we forget to bring down, year after year. Considering the fact that it no longer exists (if it ever did), it's the last thing anyone should be trying to become.

New Reality Show Taints Mother-Daughter Activities Everywhere Forever

Kelly Mills — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 00:08:00 GMT

Forget sack races and girls outings and mommy-and-me music classes: The CW network has just killed the sweet, innocent joy in every mom-and-girl activity by taking the most grotesque thing ever and televising it. Tonight is the premiere of Crowned. Mom and daughter teams live in a house, hiss at the other family units, and compete in--ta da!--a mother-daughter beauty pageant. Because beauty pageants and stage moms and women who fairly panic about losing their looks aren't nearly sad enough on their own: We have to see a combination, and then some. As Jessica said, "I just can't wait for the stretch mark montage where the moms cry about how their 'badges of honor' have all been worth it now that their daughters are anorexic and compulsive exercisers with tiaras and sceptors and then the daughters cry about how they hope they never get stretch marks like their moms even though their moms are like, otherwise, totally awesomely cool people." Sure enough.

In case you were wondering what the critics think of the show, please check out Jezebel's neat round-up of the unanimous barfing this show induced. I like what the LA Times said: "If any of the negotiating members of the Writers Guild and studio alliance are reading this, I'm begging: Please return to the bargaining table and end this strike. Because the CW's Crowned: The Mother of All Beauty Pageants debuts tonight and I'm telling you, as a television consumer and a human being, the center will not hold." It's a good reminder that there's cheesy, awful reality shows that are fun to watch, and wretched, nauseating reality shows that just necessitate a shower and a lobotomy.

Coming Attraction: 'Alpha Moms' TV Show

Alisyn — Wed, 29 Aug 2007 14:53:00 GMT

Celebrity Baby Blog is reporting that a major TV studio is recruiting 'alpha moms' to audition for a soon-to-begin-filming TV show. No details on what the show will be about, but based on the the desired characteristics of auditioning moms, it will be classic reality TV: chock full of sterotypes, clashing personalities and generalizations.

To be considered for the show, you'll have to be "Fit and fabulous -- while pregnant, you made pregnant sexy -- and bounced back in record time." You should be "a networker, with connections, and a definite point of view." You should be the kind of mom who "goes the extra mile to help her kid fit in, and not ashamed to admit it." While the show "welcomes" moms from all walks of life, moms who "enjoy the finer things in life, will call any Neiman's in the country to get THAT stroller, and spent more on their kid's birthday party than on the family vacation" are the only they're really going to cast.

Sigh. Does that sound interesting to you? Because it sounds dull as shit to me. I've got nothing against "fit" moms, sexy pregnant ladies, or mamas with "connections," (whatever that means). I say more power to you, ladies! But I'd really like to see a TV show that reflects the reality of American motherhood, and the many diverse forms it comes in, instead of yet another mindless half hour of drivel featuring the idle rich, the insecure, and the outrageous.

To be fair, I have no real information about what the show will really be like. Maybe it'll be great... who knows? I'll be pleasantly surprised if it's interesting and balanced and worth watching. Based on the descriptions of moms they're looking to ~~exploit~~ cast, though, I'll be more likely to talk a lot of trash about it, watch the premiere, yell at the TV a little, blog about how much I hate "women's programming," then fire up the TiVo to catch up on the new season of Weeds.

UK Show Puts Wee Waltzers in the Spotlight

Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass) — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 22:01:00 GMT

Soccer moms, watch out. Pretty soon, the ballroom dance parents will be beating you out for supreme yelly status, screaming from the sidelines as their kids quick-step, waltz and mambo their way to ribbons, trophies and into the finals: "Pivot! Twirl! Extended toe! No spaghetti arms!" And even better, all this will all be captured on a new TV show.

OK, not really. We all know ballroom performers and audiences (and I assume, parents) are far more dignified to yell and scream, especially if they are in the UK and especially if they are being featured on the new British show Baby Ballroom: The Championship. The new television show will seek out the UK's top 14 ballroom dancing couples under the age of 12, and will the seven best who advance into the finals. Baby Ballroom will also feature celebs from the ballroom biz that who've crossed over to big and small screen fame, including judge Pierre Dulaine, the inspiration behind the Antonio Banderas film Take the Lead.

Honestly, after reading quotes from some of the hardcore competitive kids -- like this one from 10-year old Welsh dancer Elena about her nine-year old counterpart Lloyd: “I love to dance. It makes me really happy. I can’t wait for my dance lessons every week and dancing with Lloyd is great fun." -- I hope this fun-sounding, kid-spotlighting, family show makes it across the pond soon.

L.A. Mom Proves Money's No Object When You've Got a Young Daughter & An Appointment at "Sunset Tan"

Alisyn — Tue, 12 Jun 2007 14:10:00 GMT

Before you watch this, ask yourself: how much would you pay for a quick, healthy-looking, pseudo-sun-kissed tan from L.A.'s most successful tanning salon?

Now take that number and multiply it by a thousand... You're still nowhere near what the nut you're about to roll your eyes at recently paid to have her unwilling, grade school-aged daughter (what is she, 8? 9?) spray-tanned for her class picture. E!'sl new reality show, Sunset Tan, caught the twosome on tape, and honestly, it made me feel a little sick. When they spray painted her little neck, I had to turn away. When the mother told the airbrush operator to "pay special attention to her cheekbones!!" I had to turn it off.

It's not just the thought of paying $1300 (that's one thousand, three hundred dollars) to have a child spray-painted the color of a human Orange Julius that has me reeling - I can't even deal with the fact that a grown woman allowed - no, encouraged! - her own daughter to emulate the looks of a coked-out, tore-up mess like LiLo. It's enough to boggle the mind... it's... it's so... L.A.

"You want to look like Lindsay Lohan, don't you?...."

Oh, the horror. The horror. Jump here to see it for yourself.

Reality Show Really Screws Up Family's Home

Melissa Summers — Wed, 16 May 2007 16:03:00 GMT

I was recently thinking to myself, I wonder how long it will be before a horror story about a home remodeling dream come true reality show comes to light. Here it is.

According to the article, Hollywood scouts for the short lived Fox network show, "Renovate My Family" approached the Rosier family at a Chicago boat show offering to revamp their home making it more user friendly for their son Steven who is wheelchair bound after a snowboarding accident in 2003. The family says the asked for a new attached garage to make it easier to navigate the wheelchair in the cold and icy winters.

The production company, according to the Rosiers, encouraged the family to dream even bigger urging them to sign a contract without a lawyer's review. When they finally saw the house the reveal was not what producers had hoped, the family was devastated by the renovation which was not at all what they'd hoped for. After living in the home they discovered several other alleged problems like a washing machine installed without a drain (?) and their handmade by Mr Rosier oak cupboards were replaced with press board laminate.

Gasp! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

With all the shoddy rapidly slapped together new construction I've seen in "Urban Sprawland" (the outlying suburbs of Detroit) and the frenetic pace of reality television, I am not entirely surprised. The Rosier family settled their suit out of court with confidential terms.

Rumor: K-Fed Pitches Single Dad Reality Show

Alisyn — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 15:01:00 GMT

Rumor has it that Kevin Federline is pitching his idea for a new reality show focusing on his new life as a single dad. In addition to his kids with Britney (Sean P., 18 mos., and Jayden, 6 mos.), he is also dad to Kori, 5, and Kaleb, 2, with ex Shar Jackson.

I know I'm all pro-K-Fed now, and I think he's probably just trying to make the best of the hand he's been dealt in life - when you have lemons... - but this strikes me as distasteful, if it is, indeed, true. I've never been on board with this whole "reality" TV business - in fact, I can't believe it's lasted as long as it has - and find it particularly troubling when people drag their kids into it (Wife Swap, Super Nanny, Nanny 911, etc.). In this case, I think any further exploitation of Sean and Jayden would be tantamount to child abuse; as it is, those boys can't even go to the park without paparazzi trailing them - now their own dad wants to invite them in for coffeecake, too? Please.

I would hope that Britney's lawyers would put the kibosh on any deal Kevin tries to make with a TV network - but truthfully, I wouldn't be surprised if they had masterminded the idea in the first place.

The Bachelorette's Trista & Ryan Are Back - With Baby News

Alisyn — Wed, 21 Feb 2007 16:40:00 GMT

Reality TV's original "it" couple (eat your heart out Tori and Dean!), Trista and Ryan Sutter (The Bachelorette) announced that they are expecting their first baby in August.

The Colorado based couple - he's a firefighter, she's a "purse designer" - were married in a nationally televised ceremony in 2002, but have since fallen off the pop culture radar. They do not plan to find out the sex of their baby.

Congratulations to the expectant couple!