Strollerderby : model

No dinero for Dina

Brett Singer — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 13:00:00 GMT

What do you call a couple that spent $1 million on lawyers while getting divorced, and the result was that the wife got $100,000, plus $1,075 a month in child support?

You would call them the McGreeveys. (Well, not anymore, they're divorced.)

Yes, Mr. "I Am A Gay American" and the former first lady of the Garden State are finished with their contentious divorce proceeding. NYMag describes the courtroom drama as, "incredibly public, ugly, and drawn-out," which is kind of true, although it didn't quite have the legs of the Christie Brinkley / Peter "19 is legal, dammit!" Cook case.

What's fascinating to me is that Dina is getting almost nothing. She gets a one-time payment of $109,295 from Jimbo, which is half of their shared investments, so it kind of doesn't count in my book. $1,075 a month in child support is, if I may be so bold, bupkis.

So why no dinero for Dina? Jim don’t have no money. NYMag says, "since McGreevey argued that he only makes $48,000 per year while he is in seminary, the judge ruled him 'underemployed.'" So he's studying to be a priest. I guess his book didn't sell as well as people had hoped. Jim is living with a "super-wealthy financier" but those assets don't factor in. ("Jim's in love with a Jersey boy..." OK, don't go there.)

Judge Karen M. Cassidy said that both Jim and Dina, "clearly had agendas," and "their anger seemed to override any ability to testify credibly or to be reasonable." At least she went after both of them, unlike the judge in the YouTube cuckoo-wife case.

I have to wonder how angry you have to be at your spouse to spend $500,000 on attorney's fees - each - when you must have known that there was no pot of gold at the end of the divorce rainbow. Sure, Dina was married to a guy that was sleeping with, well, another guy, so she's mad. And Jim… well, he's mad at her for something, I guess. According to the New York Post, the couple will do some swapping of 401k plans and other relatively minor assets, like a $1500 checking account. She was only asking for $2500/month. So how do you rack up half a mil worth of legal bills? Fuzzy math, at best. They have a daughter together; hopefully they'll be able to deal with each other somewhat civilly.

image/source: NYMag

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The New "Good Mother"

Kelly Mills — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 16:02:00 GMT

In the olden days of long, long ago, when our dinosaurs roamed the land and our mothers were having babies, there was a certain amount of pressure on moms. Mothers were supposed to raise the children with patience and a cheerful air of total domestic fulfillment. In the fantasy, the house was spotless, and a lovely dinner was served every night with a chic apron and a smile. Then came the glorious liberation of women from the home, and all of the sudden there were new pressures. Now moms were supposed to be successful in careers while maintaining close and loving relationships with their kids. Time was somehow divided efficiently between being an equal breadwinner and an involved parent, with board meetings flowing seamlessly into baking brownies for the PTA bake sale.

We pretty much know both those visions are crap, right? But that didn't stop women from feeling pressure to meet that ideal, and carrying around a sense of shame if they fell short. Well, you are in luck ladies, because nowadays there's a new kind of "good mother" and so now you have a whole other set of unrealistic expectations to try and meet!

The new perfect mom? She looks like she hasn't had babies at all. She only gains the teensiest amount of weight during pregnancy, and simply glows the entire nine months. Even in the delivery room, the new good mother looks radiant in her designer birth gown, posing for pictures that could grace Us magazine or be suitable for a classy birth announcement. Once the baby is born, she immediately drops all the weight she gained, without earning a single stretch mark or stomach wrinkle. You'd never know she had a baby, except for the fact that she now has gigantic boobs spilling out of her stylish dress.

Naturally a big part of the new mom pressure springs from the celebrity baby boom, when famous and genetically blessed women with access to nannies and plastic surgeons have their photos plastered everywhere, featured in lovely gowns and heels along with the news that they gave birth only seconds ago. And in other ways, I think this new mom was created by the whole "hot mom" phenomenon, where mothers railed against the idea that having children meant they became frumpy and sexless. But as is the way with so many trends manipulated by people who want to sell you stuff to make you a better you, this one turned around and became an expectation rather than an escape.

As a personal trainer, I see women who are three weeks postpartum and who are desparate to lose the baby weight. I totally applaud anyone who wants to get back in shape, but I can't help but feel for some of these mothers, who clearly believe they let themselves go during that whole pregnancy thing. When I was three weeks postpartum I would have been happy to find my car keys, let alone embark on a new fitness regime.

Truth is it doesn't matter how awesome you look in your post-birth hospital photos because no one really cares. You don't have to abandon the notion of being hot and fit and outfitted stylishly, but you also don't have to be that way 24-7, especially when you have a baby or two. But you all know this, right? Now, if we could only believe it too...

Brinkley divorce case settles

Brett Singer — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 18:15:00 GMT

"Uptown Girl" Christie Brinkley is officially rid of "Butthead Boy," aka her former husband, Peter Cook. She gets full custody of the kids, and decision-making power for them, which she said was all she wanted. She also gets to keep the 18 Hamptons homes she owns. (Yes, 18. Supermodeling pays pretty good, I guess.)

Cook had wanted some of the homes since he had advised her to buy them, but he didn't get them. He did get a lump sum payment of $2.1 million, which probably isn't that much, but in my opinion is more than he deserved. They'll also sell the family boat, which is named Sweet Freedom, and split the profits. (Rich people have more interesting stuff to split up in a divorce; if I ever split with my wife, we'd be fighting over the couch and TV.) Brinkley will give her share to charity, Cook will use his half to "make it rain" at a Long Island strip club. (OK, I made that last one up. Christie is giving hers to a domestic violence shelter. No idea what Cook will do with his.)

Nobody really came off well in this trial, although Cook's lawyer was more obnoxious by trying to paint Brinkley as a bitter ex-spouse who just wanted to drag Petey through the mud. She is the one who wanted the trial to be public, and was definitely dramatic, but it's hard to be too mad at her considering his behavior. The press at least sided with Christie throughout, which I agree with. A court-appointed psychiatrist said that "both parents were in need of counseling to deal with their personal issues… [Brinkley] needs to examine her taste in men and…Cook is a narcissist with a bottomless ego." Of the two, having bad taste in men is the lesser sin.

If you're wondering why I'm slamming Cook so hard, it's because he cheated on his wife, repeatedly, with an 18-year-old, in houses that she owned. He then paid her $300,000 to keep quiet. During the trial, the media reports (which could be biased but they were consistent) described him as not terribly guilt-ridden about his actions. Maybe that's the "bottomless ego" the court shrink was talking about.

Ah, Christie. You and Billy Joel should've stayed together. At least he wrote nice songs about you.

source/image: 1010 Wins

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Stretch Marks Are the Scourge of Western Civilization

Adrienne Martini — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Eight months into my first pregnancy, I marveled at the fact that I didn't have any stretch marks. What I didn't know is that they were all lurking under that big belly full of baby, in the spots that I couldn't see and that the spouse was too polite to point out. Of all of the many (many) indignities of pregnancy, this is the one that really chaps my behind, mostly because there isn't a darn thing you can do about them. Or is there?

The New York Times takes on stretch marks in their Style section, which seems to be the home of all of the news that isn't actually news to anyone with a pulse. My last favorite Style story was about kids destroying your interior design. To which we all say: Duh.

Still, as it turns out, various creams and potions that promise to reduce stretch marks might work, unless they don't. The only sure cure is to have laser treatments or use Retin-A, which is more than I'm willing to go, given that I don't make my living modeling bathing suits or underpants.

You, however, may feel differently. Or be an underpant model.

Photo credit: www.aafp.org

Best of FameCrawler: Week of April 25th

Whit Honea — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Kat Moss Stands Up to Pee

Brad & Angelina's Quiet Wedding

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Hello Kitty Goes High Fashion in Vogue

Kelly Mills — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 21:01:00 GMT

One of the problems with being a loveable icon of cuteness is it's hard to bust out of that mold and be taken seriously as a model. This has been the dilemma of Hello Kitty, and even posing for some racier pics and developing a vibrator with her likeness haven't helped her avoid typecasting. But that's all about to change, thanks to a designer who was willing to take a chance on her.

I swear I am not making this up: Hello Kitty will be modeling all the John Galliano (for Dior, yo) fall and winter designs in the Japanese Vogue. She will be pictured "posing with the designer and enjoying a shopping spree in Paris" as well. True life. Now, when Hello Kitty comes into your boutique, don't you pretty much give her all the stuff she wants for free?

Thankfully the cameras didn't follow her into the bathroom, because Kitty goes through so much blow you wouldn't believe it. I hear she gets most of it from her boyfriend, the lead singer for that band. You know, the one with that song? Anyhow, we wish Ms. Kitty best of luck on her career, and hope now she'll get the serious recognition she deserves.

Strollerderby : model

No dinero for Dina

Matthew McConaughey keeps placenta

What about his taste in women?

5 things that would make parents' lives easier

Brinkley divorce case settles

Lourdes and Miley kidnapped?

Political Nanny: Elizabeth Edwards Supports Husband, Wants Privacy

When Cynthia called Cindy

Is it fair to take pictures of Britney's kids?

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Is it ever OK to hit your kids?

Son stabs father over haircut

Like father like son

Kidnap dad caught

How to be an annoying camp parent

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Brinkley divorce case settles

Christie Brinkley's Ex Paid Off His 18-year-old mistress

Madonna visits divorce lawyer

Patricia Duff's daughter wants an order of protection against her

C Rod Files For Divorce

Christie Brinkley Awarded Kids As Divorce Settlement Suddenly Ends

Christie Brinkley Advised To Undergo Therapy For Anger Issues

Mama's Revenge! C-Rod Hits A-Rod Where It Hurts!

Stretch Marks Are the Scourge of Western Civilization

Best of FameCrawler: Week of April 25th

Hello Kitty Goes High Fashion in Vogue