Strollerderby : grandmother

Mom Charged for Calling Son 49 Times a Day

JeanneSager — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 15:31:00 GMT

You can love your kids. Just don't LOVE your kids so much you start stalking them.

In a case of helicopter parenting gone absolutely sky high, a seventy-three-year-old Austrian woman has been charged with stalking her son after two straight years of calling him as much as forty-nine times a day for two and a half years.

That's an average of twice an hour! Break it down to just waking hours, and yikes!

The woman says she isn't able to talk to her son or daughter and has never met her fifteen-year-old grandchild. And she didn't think there was a reason for that? You've got to wonder what kind of smotherer she was when her kids were living at home. Did she chat them up through homework time and make them report in when they wanted to go to the bathroom?

I used to be a big phone person, and I still have one aunt who I can talk with for a straight three hours on the phone (with repeated interjections from my three-year-old and her four-year-old and seven-year-old, mind you). But that's not every day - or even every week.

What can a mother and child have to talk about forty-nine times in one day? We don't even talk to our spouses that much if you think about it - we might say more than forty-nine sentences, but "honey, can you get me another roll of toilet paper?" is hardly worth dialing out about.

Now that I'm a parent, I have a lot less time for talking on the phone, and this guy has a fifteen-year-old. What about you; do you talk to your parents more or less now that YOU'RE a parent?

Image: VBHComm (not stalker grandma)

Mom Gets OK to Collect Dead Son's Sperm

JeanneSager — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:28:00 GMT

Somewhere in Texas a grandmother-to-be needs to get a grip.

Marissa Evans told a judge she wanted the rights to collect her dead twenty-one-year-old's sperm to make a grandchild because "I want him to live on. I want to keep a piece of him." The worst part? The judge said, yeah, OK, sounds good to me.

What is wrong with this picture? Oh boy, where do we begin? Maybe with the fact that Nikolas Evans is dead. Or with the fact that he was twenty-one when he died. Or how about the fact that this was his mother we're talking about?

Because a guy's random statements that he wanted to have children one day . . . and taking his sperm from his cold, dead body (I'm not being callous here, the judge got involved because they had to guarantee the sperm was gathered before his body cooled to less than 39.2 degree) are on opposite ends of the spectrum. Marissa Evans said her son really wanted to kids one day. He even had names picked out - Hunter, Van and Tod.

It's sad that this man did not get to live out his dreams, sadder still that a life was lost at twenty-one. But let's face it, children are not put on this earth for a parent's sake. We as parents create kids because we want to give them life, provide for them, help make them into productive members of society. It's supposed to be an unselfish act; living for someone else. Unfortunately, we all know too many parents who look to their kids to do for them instead of the other way around.

And that's just what Marissa Evans is expecting of an as-yet-unborn child. She wants them to replace her son, to give her a link to something she very sadly lost. Can you imagine the burden put on that tiny person's shoulders? An adult is pinning hopes and dreams on a child, who has no control over how similar or dissimilar they'll be to their dead parent.

She's not the first - a couple in New York just recently lost the fight to use their dead son's sperm to impregnate a surrogate, because they wanted to do the exact same thing. That fight was lost at the surrogacy stage, and hopefully this one will be too - or, better yet, when Marissa Evans moves past the denial stage of the grieving process, she'll realize she cannot bring her son back.

What do you think Babble readers? Would you be shooting lightning bolts downward if someone got hold of your sperm or eggs and wanted to make babies after your death?

Image: CyprusIVF

Desperately Seeking . . . Grandparents

JeanneSager — Sat, 17 Jan 2009 16:39:00 GMT

There's no question kids who have them love their grandparents - they spoil them rotten. But if your parents are gone, or might as well be, would you be willing to use the term "grandparent" loosely?

What about letting a perfect stranger stand in, just so your kids can have a grandparent?

A growing number of parents are doing just that. They're setting up personal ads; only instead of "SBF seeks SM for long walks on the beach, non-smoking, non-freaks" they're advertising for older folks who have been aching for a youngster to play with.

Matthew Gray, deputy director of the Australian Institute of Family Studies, says it's largely distance and family breakdowns keeping kids and grandparents apart, but also playing a major role are the parents who have put off babymaking. The older first-time parents are, the older their own parents are - leaving grandchild-hungry parents waiting, and sometimes leaving first-time parents without their own Mom and Dad when they're finally ready to start having children.

But parents are no less interested in exposing their kids to another generation, and those who live far away from their own parents still need the extra hand that a grandparent who is nearby is often willing to offer. Hence the advertising.

"I've got two small children now and my father lives away from us and my partner's mother is not very involved," Debbie Fitzsimmons told Australia's Daily Telegraph. "I grew up with two sets of grandparents which I benefited from big time."

Other parents say the process is equally beneficial to the surrogate grandparents; after all, being with the young is said to keep you young. For older folks who don't have family nearby, simply having a young family around to check up on them can go far in helping them maintain mental acuity and a connection with the outside world. In turn, the kids learn the importance of community and caring for our geriatric population - besides the stories of days gone by and the candies palmed when Mom isn't looking.

Would you consider adopting a grandparent or letting one adopt you so your kids can have that experience?

Image: AwardPHP

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Toddler Injured in Xmas Tree Fight Between Mom and Grandma

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 23:15:00 GMT

Sometimes you just have to suck it up and put your irritation with your mother-in-law on hold—particularly when it’s Christmas Eve, your toddler is in the room, and you’re wielding a large Christmas tree like a weapon.

A 21-month-old is in the hospital after receiving a serious eye injury during a tussle between her mother and her grandmother over a four-foot-tall Christmas tree, over which they each claimed ownership. (It really is amazing how often Christmas becomes a time to completely obliterate the Christmas spirit.) The holiday did not begin auspiciously for the family, as they were celebrating in a motel after a fire forced them out of their home.

The mother, Sandra Price, is being held on charges of reckless conduct, and it is not yet clear whether or not her daughter will lose sight in her eye.

Photo: thetelegraph.com

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A Grandmother's Right? Or Totally Obnoxious?

Kate Tuttle — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 16:23:00 GMT

A Canadian grandmother's essay about essentially crashing her daughter-in-law's birth -- including arriving after a C-section and getting to hold the baby while her daughter-in-law was still in recovery -- has prompted lots of angry comments on the newspaper site where it appeared last week.

Rhona Bennett writes of rejecting her son's advice to wait until he called to announce the baby's birth, hopping a train to Montreal, and (in cahoots with her co-grandmother) bum-rushing the hospital after a few-hour's gap in the update phone calls he was providing. The two bubbies called the hospital looking for word, and naturally were rebuffed, so off they went, in search of information, affirmation, and a grandbaby.

I think you can look at this a couple of ways. It's obviously very sweet to read of how excited Bennett was at becoming a grandmother for the first time, and you'd have to be pretty cold not to appreciate this:

On that day a vast and dazzling blend of joy, love, amazement and profound gratitude surged through me with such power, it would have shattered the mortal body that holds my spirit if my tears hadn't poured out and spread my happiness through the room and beyond.

On the other hand, she mocks her son and daughter-in-law's birthing plans (making fun of doulas, etc.), expressly disobeys their wishes, and makes it all about her. If my mother-in-law had done something like that, I don't think I'd be ready to forgive her yet, and my son is two. So, what do you think? Loving or obnoxious?

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Grandma Serves as Surrogate, Gives Birth to Triplet Granddaughters

JeanneSager — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 16:25:00 GMT

Kim Coseno's triplets had the same exact start in life as their mother . . . right down to the womb where they spent their first formative months. The surrogate "mother" who gave birth this week to Coseno's three little girls is also their grandmother.

Coseno's mom, fifty-six-year-old Jaci Dalenberg is possibly the oldest-ever surrogate to give birth to triplets. And lucky for her, she doesn't have to give them up! Well, not exactly. Already a mother of two, Coseno was no longer able to have children when her second husband, Joe, said he wanted them. The couple tried adopting, but were getting nowhere when Dalenberg made an offer they couldn't refuse.

Still in the prime of health, Dalenberg said she'd undergo in vitro fertilization. On the third try, two eggs transplanted into her uterus took.One embryo then split, creating a set of identical twins. Their sister is essentially a fraternal twin to each.

Although the "I am my own grandma" jokes go hand-in-hand with this story, I've got to give this granny a whole lot of credit. Triplets. At her age.

And while surrogacy kind of skeeves me out (for the surrogate, not for the parents-to-be), this seems like the best possible option. The Cosenos knew they could trust their surrogate completely, and that their babies were in a truly safe "home." Dalenberg, on the other hand, doesn't have to hand over the babies she carried and never see them again. She will be able to spoil them to bits, and then hand them back to Mom and Dad for the discipline and diaper-changing. She is, after all, Grandma.

Image: CBS News

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Guy Changes Name to Captain Fantastic

Brett Singer — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 17:30:00 GMT

The Telegraph is reporting that a "teenager" named George Garratt has changed his name to – wait for it – Captain Fantastic Faster Than Superman Spiderman Batman Wolverine Hulk And The Flash Combined. I think "The Flash Combined" is a Jewish name that means, "Please don't hire me for this job."

I'm putting "teenager" in quotes because the guy is nineteen. When did we decide that it was still OK to call nineteen year olds "teenagers"? Is it based on how immature they are?

Anyway, The Nitwit Formerly Known As George Garratt changed his moniker because he, "wanted to be unique." The thing is, Elton John already used the name Captain Fantastic, something the Telegraph article oddly doesn't mention.

The Captain's grandmother isn't speaking to him anymore, which seems a little shortsighted. If there's one thing this kid needs, it's a good talking to.

What would you do if your child came home and said they had changed their name to something dopey like this? Or this?

Source: Telegraph

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Mom and son barbecue grandma's remains

Brett Singer — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 19:30:00 GMT

A 50-year-old woman and her 30-year-old son in Corning, California have been accused of barbecuing the remains of Ramona Allmond, their 84 year old mother/grandmother. The creepy, kooky and altogether ooky pair also allegedly cashed her social security and retirement checks after she died. More specifically, after they CREMATED HER ON A BARBECUE.

Although the cause of Ramona Yolanda Allmond's death may never be known, her daughter and grandson allegedly allowed her body to lie on the bedroom floor for a week until moving it to a concrete culvert behind their residence, Hosler said.
The culvert had been used by the family as a makeshift barbecue, he said, noting that the family had used it to cook their Thanksgiving turkey several weeks before Allmond's death.
It's not known if they used it after the alleged cremation.

EWWW!!!!

But, as game show hosts used to say, that's not all. The mother, Kathleen Allmond, "made a necklace with a portion of her mother's skull, which she wore around her neck…[and] posted a photograph of herself wearing the necklace on her MySpace page."

In the understatement of the century, the Captain Paul Hosler of the Tehama County Sherriff's Department said, "It gets really weird when you have a piece of mom's skull hanging around your neck." Yes, Captain. Yes it does.

I have to point out that at least the son, Tony Ray, looks the part. Maybe his defense strategy could be, "Dude! I was just trying to get Rob Zombie to put me in his band…" I also think that the markings on his forehead make him look like a Klingon. (I'm assuming they are markings or a tatto, but I suppose it's possible that he really is a Klingon. Unlikely, but possible.)

This wins my award for yuckiest story of the year. Maybe the decade. Well, there's still time left. But if the vote were held today…

Image/source: Redding.com

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Do Your Kids Go to Camp Grandma As Much as You Did?

JeanneSager — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 18:05:00 GMT

The day my daughter gets married, I won't be losing a daughter. I'll be gaining a title. Mother-in-law. It makes me shudder.

With my daughter banned from dating until she's at least 47 (less of a chance of her getting knocked up on the first date that way), it's not something I think about often. I'm not quite that narcissistic (I said not quite). Still, reading the story in Britain's The Telegraph over the weekend pronouncing mothers-in-law are no longer a joke, I felt betwixt and between about my very distant future.

The wife's mother, they say, is no longer stuck at home and thus in your face, telling you how her dear little Snookums likes his eggs and wants his pants pressed. Good to know - as I don't press pants and my breakfast-making skills are more of the "grab whole wheat frozen pancakes from freezer, pop in toaster oven, slap on plate with slab of butter" variety.

Because it's out of London (with a host of mother-in-law jokes I haven't heard stateside, better brush up), most of the statistics quoted in the piece are Britain-specific. But I'd imagine they'd translate rather closely to life on this side of the pond - they point to women getting married later, more women working, all social phenomena we're seeing in America. Of note? Mothers-in-law are spending less time with the grandchildren because of the changes.

It's meant to show they're butting in less, which this daughter-in-law supports, but it made me a little sad. If, by some miracle, my husband lets his little girl out on unchaperoned at say, 36, and we end up grandparents, will the fast pace of today's life have jumped to such hyperspeed that we never get to see the little munchkins? While I grew up in the same town as one set of grandparents, the town where the second set had a second house, my daughter has one set of grandparents living four states away. My own parents ask to see her frequently, but factor in my job, my husband's and the jobs of both of my parents, and there are weeks that go by without the schedules jiving just right for a meet-up.

If that's the kind of future for the new mother-in-law, I'd rather have the jokes.

Image: CopyBlogger

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7-Year-Old Steals Grandma's Car, Becomes Hero

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 12:00:00 GMT

You may remember Latarian Milton, the seven-year-old who stole the keys to his grandma’s SUV and took it for a joyride with his friend because “it’s fun to do bad things, like drive into a car?” (He did, in fact, drive into several cars on his joyride.)

Well, just in case Latarian’s grandmother didn’t teach Latarian right and wrong with her violent threats—“If I thought they wouldn’t take me to jail, I’d whip his behind,” she said—Latarian has now become a sort of star for his bad ass ways. This recent radio interview starts with the interviewers telling Latarian that they are big fans of his. When they ask if people stop him and ask for his autograph, he says, "I'm a celebrity."

So basically Latarian has learned that acting out in potentially lethal ways makes you cool, and that violence is a great way to express your anger, so long as you don’t get caught.

Photo: ecoustics.com

Three-Year-old Takes Joy Ride Atop Grandma’s Lexus

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Whatever your worst nightmare is when you leave your kids with Grandma, it can’t be worse than this.

A 54-year-old grandmother in the Florida Keys was arrested and jailed after she was spotted driving her Lexus around a parking lot with her three-year-old granddaughter on top of it.

According to deputies, Brenda Bouschet (pictured) said “she was just giving the child some air and letting her have fun.” She also said she had one hand out the window, holding the child’s leg, and that she was driving at “snail-speed.” Bouschet seemed genuinely surprised to learn of laws requiring children to be in car seats, and, uh, not on the roof of a moving vehicle.

Although Bouschet has been released from jail, she faces child felony abuse charges. Her claims that she would never “let anything” hurt her granddaughter seem genuine, but her behavior was frighteningly reckless. What do you think? Should Grandma be let off the hook?

Photo: CBS4

52-Year-Old Delivers Twins for Her Daughter

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 00:23:00 GMT

Here’s a surefire way to beat empty nest syndrome: move from your home in Michigan to be near your daughter in Arizona—and act as the surrogate mother of her twin babies.

That’s what Crystal Sirignano did after her 30-year-old daughter, Kendra, was unable to conceive after several infertility surgeries and treatments. Sick of watching her daughter suffer, Crystal offered to become pregnant again at 52 years of age.

A vegetarian and the owner of a gym, Super Mom Crystal gave up working out and succumbed to her pregnancy cravings for meat. She recently made herself into a proud grandmother by delivering healthy twin babies for her daughter and son-in-law.

If there is ever an EXXTREME Motherhood Olympic competition, my money’s on Crystal getting the gold. As for Kendra and her husband, the new parents have already achieved some modest fame of the EXXTREME variety by competing in NBC's American Gladiators. I can't wait to find out what happens once the twins are old enough to eat spinach.

Image: ABC

Woman Gives Birth to Her Own Grandkids

Madeline Holler — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 13:07:00 GMT

In an aggressive attempt to control her grown daughter's life, a 51-year-old Brazilian woman got pregnant with and gave birth to her own grandchildren.

Actually, I think she and her daughter arranged the deal. And it would seem things have worked out as planned. They all look pretty happy.

The mom/grandma agreed to be a surrogate for the daughter/mom, after the 27-year-old daughter/mom tried unsuccessfully for four years to get and stay pregnant. After other methods for achieving pregnancy and carrying full term failed, daughter/mom looked for another woman to carry her transferred embryos.

In Brazil, though, surrogacy laws only allow close relatives to serve as baby-makers. The desperate daughter/mom is an only child, and none of her cousins stepped up. The only legal option was for mom/grandma to lend a helping uterus. Now, they have twin grandsons/sons. Way to go mom/moms!

The baby boys were delivered via c-section a couple of weeks before grandma's due date, since she was having trouble sleeping (happens to the elderly, I hear). Now she can return home to her knitting and bridge club and let someone else wake frequently in the middle of the night (though something tells me she'll want to do a lot of babysitting).

I know I’m supposed to think this is disgusting, but I actually think it’s just fine. Better than fine, even. I think it’s pretty fucking great (or pretty inseminating great, or whatever). Women are getting pregnant and giving birth at different ages, through different means and for many different reasons. Getting grandma knocked up is just different. But is that so bad?

I do wonder, though, if the 51-year-old post-partum grandmother regrets saying, "if there's anything I can do, honey ..."

I tell you, we mothers just give and give.