Strollerderby : football

Is It OK to Hate Your Kid's Sport?

Miriam Axel-Lute — Thu, 28 May 2009 15:30:00 GMT

Don't mess with the soccer moms. It might be a bit of a hackneyed sentiment in this post-Palin era, but as Sarah Rain from Delmar, NY, found out when she wrote a post titled "At Least It's Only 8 Weeks Long" on the local paper's blog for her town discussing her dislike of soccer season, the vicious soccer mom isn't gone.

You'd think from the vituperative comments that she'd said she hated her kid or couldn't be bothered to want to do anything with him at all. What she actually said, quite clearly, is that she believes that kids develop better social skills and autonomy from informal pick-up games, but since that's not really happening for her son she's dragging herself through soccer season because she thinks the benefits outweigh the costs, though all the while she's quietly hoping he doesn't fall in love with the sport.

"Mustering up the interest in something your child does is a challenge? How self absorbed can one person be?" writes one person, deriding informal games as "a can babysitting your child."

"The writer’s desire for 'informal games with their friends' means 'I don’t have to be there' . . . they are only young and “ours” for too short a period of time . . . relish the moment!" writes another. (Or, you know, she could actually believe that informal games and time not being hovered over by adults are better for children's development, an argument that has a lot going for it and is distinctly less selfish than trying to soak up the time kids are "ours".)

Another rhapsodizes about how much she loves dragging herself out of bed on Saturday mornings to pack snacks for games, clearly implying that this is the proper attitude of motherhood.

I happen to know that the writer was much amused by all the kerfuffle (and probably courted it on purpose), but what she wrote was hardly extreme. If these are the attitudes of the people she has to hang out with when her son's at soccer practice, I don't wonder that she dreads it. Is this level of martyrdom-to-the-planned-activity-gods attitude really so pervasive? It makes me scared to consider organized sports for my kids.

Photo CC by Chip Griffin via Flickr.

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Morning News - Obama Loves Google

Brett Singer — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 13:00:00 GMT

Hello and welcome to Morning News! We're giving Madeline a break, so I'll be your Morning Newser for today. Let's get right to it, shall we?

President Obama wants good advice about science and technology and stuff. After that sentence, I think we all know that he isn't picking me to sit on that panel. He did, however, ch-ch-choose Eric Schmidt, the CEO of some little startup called Google. I think they might have a web site or something. Not sure.

In sports news, Michael "Dogs? What dogs?" Vick is releasing a revised bankruptcy plan today. A judge rejected the plan his lawyers presented, which had Mike asking to keep "multiple houses, multiple cars, and a Ms. Pacman video game" according to ProFootballTalk.com. Vick was a talented athlete but a complete moron. He blew through most of his money and then went to jail for dogfighting, thus losing his lucrative NFL contract. He may come back and play again, but I doubt he'll get the same paycheck that he had before. Trivia moment: Vick's contract is still the highest any NFL player has ever signed. He never got all of the money, of course, but it was still a record contract.

The United Auto Workers may own 55% of Chrysler when all the wheeling (no pun intended) and dealing is done. Does that make them management? Can you stil be "labor" if you own the company?

This swine flu thing gets worse and worse. MSNBC is reporting that some folks in Mexico who had the virus were turned away by doctors. Nice. "Country faces criticism for seemingly slow, confused response to outbreak," according to MSNBC.com. How hard is it to treat sick people? OK, we don't always do such a good job of that in this country. Well, better than Mexico. I hope.

Speaking of swine flu, SuperEco has a list of ways to protect yourself... naturally. (You need to say "naturally" in a breathy voice to get the full effect of that sentence.) Tips include natural hand sanitizers and my personal favorite, "Limit personal interaction." So stay inside and don't talk to anyone. Works for me.

I think this article from the New York Times implies that hobbits might be real. Well, not exactly, but people the size of hobbits.

Tired of having so many DVDs around the house? G.E. may have found a way to put 100 of them on one disc using holographic storage.

Finally, this odd item: "A jet normally used as Air Force One rattled windows and workers Monday morning. President Obama, who was not aboard, was reported to be furious." See, when you fly a plane over New York City and you get too close, we have bad memories. Apparently it was meant to be a "photo opportunity." Guys, a little advice: next time, just buy a postcard.

Image: Wikipedia

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Six-Year-Old Soccer Star Could be the Next Beckham

JeanneSager — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 22:02:00 GMT

At six years old, I got a whopper of a scar on my knee out of pure klutziness - put a soccer ball in front of me, and I was flat on my face.

Which makes me that much more impressed that the kid being hailed as the next Beckham - or better yet the next Zinedine Zidane - isn't suiting up to play in the English Premier League anytime soon. He's six.

Six, and Madin Mohammed can spin his body in a three-sixty around an opposing player without blinking - and more importantly without losing touch on the ball. His on-ball skills are stunning - mostly because they're effortless. At that age, the ability to move a ball with that accuracy is talent - pure and simple. There are players in the English Premier League today who don't have that kind of control. It's no wonder the top officials at Chelsea and Real Madrid (Beckham's old team in Spain) have their eye on him.

Maybe his age plays a role here - Mohammed moves without thinking, which is easier to do when you're six years old, playing purely for fun. His age doesn't account for the fluidity, the natural talent that can't be taught. But his parents would be wise to keep the sniffing scouts at bay, to allow him to develop that talent while he's able to take adantage of the youthful joy of movement, the lack of pressure.

Check out his skills - it could be the French rap (everything sounds better in French, doesn't it) but this video is mesmerizing.

Do you think he has the stuff to take over the soccer world? Would you suggest the world just back off for awhile?

Image: Polish News

Source: Yahoo

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Comcast Super Bowl Surprise

Brett Singer — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 15:00:00 GMT

Some Arizona cable subscribers got mighty ticked off during the Super Bowl on February 1. But not only because the Cardinals lost the game.

Certain Comcast cable customers were watching Larry Fitzgerald's terrific catch and run with just over two minutes left in the game, when suddenly something… else… appeared on their screens. A movie. The kind of movie you really don't want your kids to see.

The title of said movie was "Wild Cherries 5." Let's just say that you don't really need to have seen any of the first four films in order to follow the plot.

This comment from The Arizona Daily Star website sums it up nicely and even uses clean language:
It was really weird. I thought at first, awww, whet are they doing , thinking it was just an edgy commercial that the Superbowl is known for.
Then it was clear that something was really wrong as the guy stood up and everything was there, yes, everything.

If you want to see the video, click here. It is not safe for work, school, children, or pets. Well, maybe pets. Maybe.

All kidding aside, parents who were watching the game with their kids were quite peeved at this year's wardrobe malfunction. (Also from the AZ Star.)
I had a 2 and a 7 year-old in the room and it was totally disgusting. Comcast better get ready to give all subscribers at least one free month of service for having to be subject to this filth!

Full month of service from Comcast and Cox cable (make up your own joke there, Beavis)? Nope. Ten bucks. Maybe they can use it to order some pay-per-view.

One parent who understands how those parents feel is Tristan Kingsley, the star of the film in question. Kingsley, who has appeared in 600 adult films (I get tired just typing that phrase), has two children of her own, a three year old girl and a four year old boy. She told the Star, "I've read some comments that parents have left on different blogging sites, and I can understand that they'd get a little upset that their children might be watching it. I would never go and put one of my videos on for my kids to watch."

Wow. Just…wow.

What would you do if you were watching TV with your kids and suddenly saw… that?

Source: AZStarnet.com (1, 2), Gizmodo

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Pittsburgh Schools Open Late Day After Super Bowl

Brett Singer — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 16:50:00 GMT

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Children belong in school.

Pittsburgh Public Schools opened two hours late today. Why? Well, the Steelers were in the Super Bowl. Duh.

And now that the Steelers won (great game, for what it's worth), the statement that school district spokesperson Ebony Pugh made on Friday seems prescient: "People will be staying up late; there will be some partying."

I have no doubt that Pittsburgh partied like it was 2006, when Pittsburgh also won, and schools were similarly delayed. But the game ended at 10pm. While it's very nice of the district to delay the start of school so that parents can have an extra hour or two to get over their hangovers (frankly, I could've used an extra couple of hours and I'm in New York), it seems like a ridiculous move. One parent, Latoya Taylor, is going to miss time at work because of the delay. Is Ben Roethlisberger going to reimburse her?

I hate to be a sourpuss. But I really think this is stupid. "The district hopes the delay will cut down on absenteeism." How about expecting people to be responsible enough to get up and get their kids ready for school? Or not keeping them up so late that they're overly tired in the morning? If a parent decides, as my mother did with opening day at Yankee Stadium, that a sporting event is worth missing school for, that's one thing. But when the district makes that decision for everyone, I don't like it.
Anyone from Pittsburgh want to weigh in? I mean, congrats on the win. Great game. But are you happy that schools were delayed two hours? Non-Pitt residents, how would you feel if this happened in your hometown?

Source: PittsburghLive

Image: pps.k12.pa.us

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Do Your Kids Watch The Super Bowl?

Brett Singer — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 15:30:00 GMT

This year, for the first time in many years, my friends and I are forgoing the family Super Bowl watching experience in favor of a visit to a local tavern. Basically, almost everybody has kids now, which means that by halftime, we all have to go home. Last year, when the New York Football Giants beat the New England Patriots (heh heh) in what was one of the biggest upsets in sports history, we were all back in our living rooms, watching it alone.

Is that a big deal? No. Would it have been more fun to watch the game with the guys, especially this catch by David Tyree (included here to torture Patriots fans)? Sure.

As it turns out, none of our children care about the game. They like to hang out together, but we can do that anytime. This way the fans can watch the game and only leave at halftime if its a blowout.

So that's my deal this year. I'm wondering about our readers. Do your children watch the Big Game? For that matter, do you? And if your kids do watch, how old are they?

My pick: Sunny is pulling for the Steelers, and I would join her. But the fact that the Cardinals haven't won in, like, 100 years or something, is making me root for them. That, Kurt Warner being really old (as The Onion points out), Edgerrin James getting a chance to win a Super Bowl after watching his old team The Colts win the year after he left, Arizona being the underdog... they get my rooting interest. That means nothing, of course. And I have nothing against the Steelers. They just won a couple of years ago, though.

So – big game or no big game, and kids or no kids?

Image: Zimbio

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Coach Charged in Death of Football Player

KeriF — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 17:02:00 GMT

Max Gilpin was 15 years old when he died in August, just three days after passing out during a grueling football practice. How grueling? So grueling that prosecutors are now charging Gilpin's coach, David Jason Stinson, with reckless homicide.

Prosecutors claim that Stinson acted irresponsibly by overworking his players in sweltering weather with a 94-degree heat index. They say he should have known that heat stroke was possible in such weather.

According to witnesses, Coach Stinson repeatedly yelled at the players and told them they would have to run sprints up and down the field until one of them quit the team. One witness told police it was "appalling" how the coaches were treating the players; another witness said it was typical tough love.

So why is the coach being charged? One witness says no water was offered to the players; the log shows the team received three water breaks in a 30-minute period shortly after taking the field but none after the sprinting began.

Gilpin was not the first player to collapse that day. Another student collapsed around 6pm; he was taken to the shade and treated with water and ice packs. Fifteen minutes later, Gilpin collapsed and was treated similarly; when he did not respond well to treatment the paramedics were called. Both students were taken to the hospital, where Gilpin died three days later.

I do think that high school athletics can be a bit rough, and clearly practice should have ended when the first player collapsed, but I don't really understand why this coach is being criminally charged. There have been other football players who died from heat stroke during practice, most notably Minnesotta Vikings offensive lineman Korey Stringer, who died in 2001. According to the National Center for Catastrophic Injury Research, there were six heat-related deaths in high school and college athletics in 2008. More than 120 athletes have died since 1931. No coach has ever been criminally charged.

Obviously, nothing will bring Max Gilpin back. But hopefully his death will make coaches think twice about their practice techniques in extreme heat. I don't think the threat of a murder charge can have any more power than that.

School Game Ends 100-0, Who Won?

JeanneSager — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 15:23:00 GMT

Remember when you lost your high school game and your mother told you to stop crying, "it's only a game"?

Let the record show, Mom was right.

Because a Dallas, Texas coach who left the first string in to bring the score to 100 to 0 against a team made up of children with learning disabilities, is nothing but a big loser.

Administrators from the Covenant School of Dallas issued a formal apology last week after the Christian school's girls basketball team wiped the floor with their opponents' dignity. They're forefeiting the game, and school officials promised they "have acted to ensure that such an unfortunate incident can never happen again" (no word on whether that means a coach will be fired or disciplined?).

The Covenant girls were up 59 to 0 when the first half ended, against a team of girls who have never won a game. There was no danger of losing. Still, the first string was left in the game. The benched girls never got their chance for Covenant, and the Dallas Academy girls never got a chance - period.

Jezebel tried to play the whole thing off as anti-feminist, accusing the girls of "being afraid to kick ass."

Puh-lease. These kids are in high school. They aren't supposed to be kicking ass. They're supposed to be learning about sportsmanship, discipline, teamwork. . . and getting some exercise.

Growing up in a sports-oriented (mostly football) school district, I found that too often the line between sports as part education and sports for sports' sake became blurred. There is an expectation in many of these schools that sports are there so the kids can play, get recognition from scouts and scurry their butt off to a Division I school with a fat scholarship.

Wrong. Sports belong in schools only as part of the well-rounding of children's education. It's one of the reasons I'd like to see more emphasis on intramurals and less money spent on sending kids two hours on a bus to play another big school, costing taxpayers more and taking the kids out of more and more classtime. Because, in school, kids are supposed to learn about how to get ready for the real world, and sports can offer part of that to the children who enjoy athletics. The teamwork, the discipline, and, in light of the childhood obesity crisis, a lifelong love of movement can go a long way in the real world.

So too can the ability to forge relationships with those you oppose. Because somewhere along the way, we have lost the art of civil discourse in this country. The Rush Limbaughs of the world won't say, "well, President Barack Obama won, and I don't think he can do it, but I hope he will." Instead, it's "I hope he fails." There is no meeting in the middle, no getting ahead only to reach back and help someone else along.

And our kids are taking up that mantra. They are running their opponents into the ground - figuratively, and, in this case, literally.

This isn't about feminism (could it be when you're talking about two girls teams facing off). It isn't about being "too wussy."

It's about common decency. It's about allowing your opponents on the court and in life a little dignity. Because who wants our kids to get ahead if they have to climb over everyone else on their way up?

Image: ABC News

Babble Podcast for January 12, 2009

Brett Singer — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 03:24:00 GMT

Here is the eighth Babble Podcast.

You can either listen right here

or download the MP3 file by clicking here.

On today's episode:

1. Quick news update:
- Barack Obama is a celebrity? How about Bristol Palin?
- Al Franken won – maybe.
- The Jets didn’t make the playoffs, which is worse than the Giants losing to the Eagles. Not much worse. But worse.
2. The Week in Blog
- A six-year-old driving to school alone, extra nipples, and Jett Travolta.
3. Comment of the Week
- Nobody ever claps for parents. Today, we fix that.
4. The Last Word
- The Wii Fit lets me work out in my living room, away from the freaks at the gym.

Notes on this podcast:

Songs parodied:
- The Knack, My Sharona

Songs mangled:
- Led Zeppelin, Immigrant Song

Posts mentioned:

Parents Wait a Decade to Report Missing Child

Six-Year-Old Drives Himself to School After Missing Bus

Mom-to-Be Has Two Vaginas, Two Uteruses

Tripp Palin's Name Explained

Extra Nipples, Anyone?

Yup, This is a Fairy Door

Sasha Obama Brought Something Ugly To School

Update: John Travolta Son's Death Details & Statements

John Travolta's Son Dies

Funeral For Jett Travolta In Ocala

Stuff You Never Thought You'd Say -- Winter Edition

UPDATE: Kid Kissing A Pig - The Musical

Should Homeschooling Parents Be Certified?

Mom Saves Kids From Sinking SUV

More News About Missing Child Adam Herrman

Past Podcasts:

Babble Podcast for December 15, 2008

Babble Podcast for December 8, 2008

Babble Podcast for November 24, 2008

Babble Podcast for November 17, 2008

Old Bat Who Kept Kid's Football Sues His Family

JeanneSager — Sat, 03 Jan 2009 17:05:00 GMT

Remember the eighty-nine-year-old woman who proved every neighbor kid's worst fears about the cranky lady down the street? You know, Edna Jester, the octogenarian who actually kept the kid's football?

She got out of the charges of petty theft, jail time and the fines the cops threatened back in October. But since the satisfaction of keeping the pigskin didn't do enough for her, she's now suing the family of seven who called the cops over the missing ball.

She claims "emotional distress" because balls keep ending up in her yard. I know Amy put up a good argument for ol' Edna back in October, citing the parents' need to get their kids under control. Yes, kids should be taught to respect the neighbors.

But I know this type of woman (do I dare say I'm related to her?), and I know what it's like to live with neighbors on top of you. Balls flying into the neighbors' yard is one of those facts of living in close proximity to one another. My husband, daughter and I love to kick the soccer ball around our back yard - and I can't begin to count the number of times it's sailed out of the yard (I never said I was particularly GOOD at kicking the ball around).

If the balls were going through her windows, if the kids were trampling her begonias, if Edna had called the parents first - instead of keeping the dang football - she would be so in the right it isn't even funny. She'd probably even be able to get money in court for said broken window or begonias. Instead she's tying up the courts over balls and playthings flying into her yard.

I've got a few suggestions for you Edna - how about you build a really tall fence or pack up your fanny and move? Maybe a nice family will move into Blue Ash, Ohio so a pick-up football game can take place across TWO yards.

Image: GovGab

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The Longshots: Girls Can Play Football . . . and Make You Cry

JeanneSager — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 17:29:00 GMT

If somebody just gives them the boost, kids can forget what "other people think." It's one of those "messages" that comes blaring out of the newest "kid as sports phenom/role model to America" films to hit DVD just in time for Christmas.

"The Longshots," based on the true story of the Jasmine Plummer, the first girl to lead a boys Pop Warner football team to the national championships, got so-so reviews when it was making the rounds of the theatres over the summer. But I've always had a thing for those stories of the girls playing "boys" sports, and when you're talking the real deal . . . a shy, smart girl who simply has physical talents . . . who cares that the director used to bounce around a stage telling the world he did it all for the "Nookie?"

The movie puts Keke Palmer in the role of Plummer, the now teenaged Illinois high school student who told a Chicago-area paper over the summer, "I was always taught to go after what I wanted and to be the best I could be. To me, it was just me doing what I loved and having fun with it."

Palmer as Plummer is the kind of kid you root for - even through the somewhat predictible plot points that these girl playing a boy's game films have to hit (getting blitzed by a pissed off male teammate during practice until she shot the ball right at his nuts? come on, you sort of saw that coming). Her uncle, played by Ice Cube, comes out of his shell from the dopey layabout with a fondness for forty-ounce cans of beer from the local convenience store into the guy who finds himself again by helping a child change her life. Preditable? Aaaach, it still made me weepy.

But what really makes "The Longshots" worth watching - and the story worth hearing - is the fact that this story came to light in 2003. Remember - the real Plummer is still a teenager in 2008. The film tells a story of her as a pre-teen, with Palmer sporting sweet braids and getting stood up for a game of double dutch by the class mean girls.

It took until 2003 for a Pop Warner quarterback at national levels not to need a jock strap.Why? Because Title IX isn't working? No, girls have to be allowed on the teams of their male classmates these days, and as a reporter for the local paper, I've written about them. Girls on the wrestling team. Girls on the football team. In both of the cases here in my area, the coaches were from the old school (one was my father's assistant football coach in high school people . . . it doesn't get much more old school). Those coaches' biggest concern? Making sure EVERYTHING was equal - equal playing time, equal training time. They weren't that concerned about coaching girls. So, no, I wouldn't put the blame on the coaches anymore - at least not all of them.

In the special features of "The Longshots" DVD, Plummer's real uncle revealed the people making the biggest fuss about his niece making directions from inside the huddle were the other mothers. This wasn't part of the movie or manufactured by Fred Durst to move his story along. We've still got the Mommy police out in full force, making parents second guess what they allow their kids to dream and do.

Remember the "what will the neighbors think?" argument from your mother, when you wanted to stay out until midnight on a Saturday night? It's alive and well, and holding back our kids for no reason other than the jibber-jabbering that parents love to do about other parents. We can give our little girls trucks and send our little boys to twirl around the backyard with tutus, but someone else can always make them question it.

It's our job to help them ignore it.

Image: Amazon

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Babble Podcast for December 8, 2008

Brett Singer — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 04:25:00 GMT

Here is the sixth Babble Podcast.

You can either listen right here

or download the MP3 file by clicking here.

On today's episode:

1.    Quick news update:
       - Barbara Walters' Most Fascinating People may not be all that fascinating
       - Plaxico Burress. Oy vey.
       - The Senate race in Minnesota is starting to sound like one of Al Franken's SNL sketches

2. The Week in Blog
- Pregnant 1 year old, Cream Booties and Britney Spears. Not all at once.

3. Comment of the Week
- Might want to re-think those rules for your son, dude.

4. The Last Word
- Political Correctness is back!

Notes on this podcast:

Songs parodied:

- REM, Stand
- Billy Joel, Captain Jack
- Movin' On Up, Theme Song from The Jeffersons

Posts mentioned:

Pregnant 1-Year-Old

Calculate the Odds You'll Get Divorced

10 WORST. BABY. PRODUCTS. EVER! (Part 2)

Top 10 Black Friday/Cyber Monday Baby Products

Cyber Monday Deals: The Complete List of Online Discounts

Brookstone Item That's Truly Useful for Parents

Organic Cream Booties

Video: Britney's X Factor "Womanizer" Performance! Hot!

Chris Brown Dumps Pregnant Rihanna?!!?

Brad To Apologize To Jen For Cheating (Little Late Now Isn't It)?

50 Rules for My Unborn Son

Do You Take Your Baby Bar Hopping?

They Say: Get Some Sleep or Die

Explaining Plaxico Burress To A Seven Year Old

Suri Cruise: Most Powerful Child On The Planet

Grown Kids Try Forcing Dad To Divorce Second Wife In Court

Past Podcasts:

Babble Podcast for November 24, 2008

Babble Podcast for November 17, 2008

Babble Podcast for November 10, 2008

Explaining Plaxico Burress To A Seven Year Old

Brett Singer — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 16:45:00 GMT

This past week, my son, who is not a big football fan, asked me the following question:

"Dad, did Plaxico Burress shoot himself in the thigh?"

Yes, I said.

"Why did the New York Post call him a Giant Idiot?"

Well, said I, he plays for the Giants. ("I know that, dad.") And he did something really stupid.

"What did he do, dad?"

At this point I had a decision to make. Where do I go with this? I could have avoided the issue I guess, but that seemed pointless since he clearly had heard about the incident at school. Just to make sure, I asked. And yes, kids at school were talking about Quick Draw Burress, the Giant Idiot.

So what did I say? I told him that Plaxico was carrying a gun, which wasn't a great idea but that wasn't the main problem. The main problem was that he was carrying a gun and it went off. Luckily it only hit him, but it could have hit someone else. And the best way to avoid that would be to not have a gun at all.

"Why did he have a gun, dad?"

I don't know, kiddo. Some people think it makes them safer. That if something happened, they would be protected. The thing is, in this case, if Plaxico couldn't even take the gun out of his pocket without it going off accidentally, what makes him think he would be able to use it to defend himself? Plus, if he's afraid that something will happen to him when he goes out, maybe he should stay home. I think I threw in something about how Burress is a good football player, but probably not a very smart guy, since its hard to play football after you shoot yourself in the thigh. If memory serves, that got a laugh.

This isn't exactly what I said, but I think it's pretty close. What I didn't say to my son, but I will say here, is that I think it's really dumb to have guns around children. Plaxico has a 2 year old child at home. This isn't a case of someone trying to protect their home. This is a handgun. It's also an unlicensed handgun, which is a crime. I think I said something about the fact that Plaxico had a gun that he "wasn't supposed to have", without getting into mandatory sentencing laws or other legalities.

I understand that a lot of sports figures feel like targets. But everyone, no matter what they do for a living, have to be responsible. Someone could have gotten hurt. I know it's easy to say that, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." But if there's no gun, the likelihood of someone getting hit with a bullet decreases exponentially.

When I was a kid, I don't think I ever asked my mother these kinds of questions. Reggie Jackson may have been an egomaniac and a womanizer, but as far as I know, he never shot anyone. Or himself.

Image: ebay

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A Genetic Test That Predicts Kids' Athletic Futures

JeanneSager — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 16:32:00 GMT

Think your toddler has the foot to bend it like Beckham one day? What if the only thing standing between you and knowing if they'd one day be kicking balls in the big leagues was $149? Oh yeah, and a cheek swab which should be bagged and sent out to a lab in Colorado for testing.

The Boulder-based Atlas Sports Genetics is touting a new test which they say can help pinpoint a child's natural athletic future. For that $149, you'll get a report telling you whether your kid is designed for speed or endurance.

It all sounds a bit West German, Soviet bloc to me, but Atlas owner Kevin Reilly says his test will actually help protect kids with an overzealous parent from being pushed into a sport they simply weren't made to play. The tests are built off of the 2003 study which linked the gene ACTN3 to athletic ability. The study found that the R variant of the gene directs the body to produce a protein used in developing the type of muscle mass needed for power and speed. By contrast, the X variant of the gene was found to be more prevalent in the elite endurance Olympians studied.

Atlas' test breaks down the ACTN3 gene from the swabs and looks for either R or X variants, then reports back to parents. They test kids ages one through eight, with the hopes of giving parents a chance to properly foster a kid's natural abilities from a young age (although, to give him credit, Reilly advises against heavily pushing children into competitive sports until at least eight years old . . . to avoid burnout).

Besides the fact that many scientists have said ACTN3 studies are still in their infancy, and a more in-depth look at the genetic make-up of athletes is in order, I'm skeptical. So a kid may have an R variant of a gene (the one supposedly pointing to power sports); what if he doesn't like football? Won't this promote more overzealous parents rather than limit them?

My husband is a big soccer fan, so he loves kicking the ball around with our three year old. For a tot, she's got a great handle on the ball. But does that mean we should cut out all requests for tee-ball, softball, even a bid to run cross country? Whatever happened to letting our kids play sports because they enjoy them, because they'll gain discipline, learn sportsmanship, get their butts off the couch? Last time I checked, it really is just a game.

Growing up in a small town where the fight for passing the school budget was to ensure we'd still have a football program every year - so boys would have a chance to get noticed by a college scout - I've got to tell you, excellent athletes are few and far between. The best athletes may not be the girls who score every goal or the quarterbacks who lead their teams to the state championships. The kids who are told constantly that they're destined for great things are often ball hogs and prima donnas.

But the kids who discover talent on their own . . . they're the kids who play just for the love of the game.

Image/Source: The New York Times

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Urlacher Paints Son's Toenails: So What?

JeanneSager — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 15:02:00 GMT

If he weren't in one of the manliest professions on the planet (professional football player? come on testosterone), I'd still laugh at the claims against Chicago Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher. His ex-girlfriend says their son comes home from Dad's house with nail polish on his toes and Cinderella Pull-Ups 'round his waist. I say, who cares?

Urlacher says he took his baby mama to court for violating a January court order that was supposed to guarantee he'd have their son, Kennedy, every Monday afternoon through Tuesday evening. Then her name started showing up in newspapers, claiming the football player's been painting Kennedy's toenails with blue polish and sending him home wearing princess Pull-Ups. Urlacher says its true - the boy's sisters paint his toes, and what kind of Pull-Up ends up on the boy - or his three-year-old sister - is simply the one he grabs from the pile.

I'm sure Urlacher's fame plays a role in all of this. As one of those non-football watching Americans (sorry guys, I did my shuffle to the couch after Thanksgiving dinner and settled in for a chick flick), I don't know much about the guy, how he plays or what he's done. But this is sounding more and more like a "nothing" case with each story I read. There are no reports (that I've read anyway) saying he hits his child, denies him food or clothing. As for shelter, the guy is actually taking Tyna Robertson to court so he can spend MORE time with the boy under his roof.

Could these really be the kinds of accusations used to prove someone's an unfit parent?

I'd hardly call this gender bending. My three-year-old daughter prefers the "boy" dress up box we picked out to the "girl" box. She immediately donned the cowboy vest and hat along with a Batman face mask and pirate sword and pronounced herself Super Larry (your guess is as good as mine). Most parents would congratulate us for opting to give her the choice instead of presenting the typical box of pink tutus and shipping the pirate garb to a cousin's son. Shouldn't it work both ways?

Image: Joliet Herald News

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Trick or Treating With the Obamas: Scary or Too Cute?

Why Monday Night Football Is Important To This Election

Brett Singer — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 22:00:00 GMT

You probably think that a football game has no bearing on tomorrow's election.

Silly voter!

First: both Barack Obama and John McCain will appear tonight on Monday Night Football. They will be interviewed by Chris Berman, a man whose idea of humor is referring to quarterback Jack Delhomme as "Daylight Come And You've Gotta Delhomme." (Get it? "Go home?" "Delhomme?" It's even funnier when he says it every single week.) According to media reports, "The interviews will give both candidates a last major chance to appeal to Americans during a coveted spot on prime-time television. Monday Night Football has averaged 12.2 million viewers this season." That's better than the typical halftime show, although I doubt Janet Jackson will show up and offer a wardrobe malfunction. And while I would personally love it if Obama quoted Chris Rock and said, "Redskins? That's racist! That's like having a team called the New York Ni**ers," I'm guessing he won't say that. But maybe McCain will? Nah. Wouldn't be prudent, you know?

Second: if the Redskins win the game, the incumbent party – the Republicans, in case you've forgotten – wins the election. This has been true since 1948, except for once. In 2004, the 'Skins lost and George W. Bush won. Obviously this isn't a lock. Still, this is one of those weird little things that make you believe in a higher power that has a sense of humor.

The predictions I've seen generally favor the Steelers tonight, but it should be close. So if you want to start obsessing a day early, you can stay up late tonight and watch the game.

Also of interest: Obama was on Monday Night Football back in 2006 to announce… that he was a Chicago Bears fan. Here's the video.

Sources: WSJ, CBC (also image), Sporting News

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Jon Stewart says: Ted Stevens is a Cheap Date

N-Word Flies at Palin Rally

Babble Talk: The Candidates Health Plans

Which Candidate Has The Best Name?

How much is Sarah Palin worth?

They say: McCain not thrilled with Palin and she wants to run in 2012

Palin Speaks Out On Special Needs Trusts

Will Ferrell Returns to SNL

UPDATE: Jon Stewart says "F*** All Y'All"

Do You Let Your Kids Stay Up to Watch the World Series?

JeanneSager — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 20:34:00 GMT

Now that the Red Sox are finally out of contention (yes, I confess, I'm a Yankees fan - pity freely accepted), I'm actually considering watching the World Series. Too bad my daughter won't be watching it with me. Game One will start at 8 p.m. tomorrow night, just as I'm preparing to hurry her into a bath.

I've always wondered why sports championships are played so late - at least for those of us on the East Coast.

Football ends with just one late night for kids, the Super Bowl is over and done after one long, junk-food filled night. Basketball closes out in June, when fewer kids are in school anyway. And unfortunately, soccer has yet to catch enough fans for the MLS Cup to break too many hearts.

When the Yankees won their last championship, I was passed out in bed. As hard as I tried to keep my eyes open, work the next morning beckoned along with my bed. I did a little cheer when my husband woke me up to tell me the news, then I rolled over and went back to sleep. Seven late nights were too much for the adult me, not to mention the little Bronx Bombers out there. Every sappy commercial meant to make moms blubber so hard they forget they don't need the product and buy it anyway features a dad and a kid playing catch in the backyard. Little boys might as well be handed a glove on the way out the door of the hospital in this country. Haven't you heard? It's supposed to be America's game, and games are for kids.

So why don't they split the seven games across the clock the way they split them between stadiums? I mean, I'm happy for the little Phillies fanatics out on the West Coast who are ready to cuddle up on the couch with Mom and Dad this week. And those Rays fans. . . if there are any? (sorry, I'm a fan of anyone who can keep the Red Sox out of the series!).

Maybe when my daughter's a little older, she'll be camped out on the couch with us too. Will you be keeping your kids up to watch the series?

Image: AllPosters

Will Madonna Have a Baby With A-Rod?

Do You Tell Your Kids to Fight Back?

Parent Coaches: Hardest Job They'll Ever Volunteer For?

Part II: Why Parents of Boys Have It Better (And Why They Don't)

Parent Coaches: Hardest Job They'll Ever Volunteer For?

JeanneSager — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 18:06:00 GMT

Parents who coach their kids get a bad rap. But Iowa football Coach Kirk Ferentz wasn't playing favorites when he suspended his son from all team activities this weekend after the 19-year-old was charged by police for underage drinking.

It's a reminder that the parent coach doesn't always have the easiest row to hoe.

They're accused to playing their kid first, playing their kid longest. If they take the other tack and limit their kid's playing time and focus the discipline on their own child, the other parents start whispering about how hard they're being on that poor kid. Really, they can't win.

Yet, you see a lot of parent coaches. Who else is going to step in? You don't see a lot of down-on-their-luck lawyers mandated by the court to coach a the mighty ducks or former pro baseball players with a pest control business and lack of ethics that will take on a paying gig to lead a bunch of bears out of embarrassment. Even on the high school level, where there is actually pay (however meager) on the line, coaches are generally either school staffers or parents. Sometimes they're both.

They do it because they want to spend time with their child. They do it because they don't want their kid to have to do without the chance - and no one else is stepping up to coach. They do it because they like the sport. And they take it on the chin all season long.

Image: Amazon

Do You Tell Your Kids to Fight Back?

Family Keeps Dead Mother in the Freezer For More Than a Year

Father Has Son Sent to Jail for Being Lazy

Equally Shouldering the Parenting Duties - Literally

Does PSA Blame Parents for their Daughters Being Raped?

Best of FameCrawler: Week of October 3rd

Whit Honea — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 20:00:00 GMT

Matt Bryant Plays, Honors Son (Updated)

Duggars Reveal Sex Of Baby # 18

Bill Maher Calls Sarah Palin "A Bimbo"

Sarah Silverman Is Still Doing That Baby-Making Thing With Jimmy Kimmel.

Angelina's Post Baby Body Revealed- Photos

Travis Henry Arrested

Jim Carrey Says Jenny McCarthy's Son Taught Him a Deeper Love

Jenny McCarthy Hits Back At Amanda Peet On Vaccine Issue

Chris Rock: Sarah Palin's A Hockey-Mom Version Of Kim Kardashian

Justin Timberlake Proposes To Jessica Biel! Is She Pregnant?

Sarah Palin: Miss Alaska Pageant Video

Kurt Warner, family quarterback

Brett Singer — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 15:00:00 GMT

We hear a lot about football players who behave badly, so it's always nice to read about those that don't. Kurt Warner, the Super Bowl winning quarterback who is currently having a late-career resurgence in Arizona (he's 37, which is old for the NFL) is also a father. A father of seven. Two of the seven were from his wife Brenda's previous marriage; one of those two has special needs (not mentioned in the Times article).

Warner is a great sports success story; he was stocking shelves at a supermarket before joining the Rams and leading them to a Super Bowl. He's living proof that NFL players don't have to be highly touted, heavily recruited college athletes in order to play well. If the Times article is to be believed, he and his wife Brenda are also pretty good parents.

Kurt and Brenda (a former Marine) have a list they call, "Eight Rules for Being a Warner Daughter or Son." Some highlights:

1. Everyone has to agree on which strangers’ meal to pay for when dining at a restaurant.

The Times describes a situation where the Warners pick someone and pay their tab, without their knowledge. In other words, if you see Kurt and Co. at a restaurant, you might get a free meal.

4. After ordering at a restaurant, be able to tell Mom the server’s eye color.

5. Throw away your trash at the movie theater and stack plates for the server at restaurants.

I like these a lot, especially the eye color thing, since I've never heard it before. I see people treat those in the service industry (waiters, waitresses, taxi drivers, etc.) like crap all the time, and I see kids do it as well. Forcing your children to pay attention to these folks and treat them with respect is important, and knowing their eye color is an interesting way to do it.

This isn't to say that I plan on tacking a copy of Warner's Rules on our door, but it's food for thought.

Source/Image: NYTimes

Man ejected from Yankee Stadium for lack of patriotism

Shawn Johnson, Democrat? (UPDATE: Now with video)

Revenge of the Baseball Gods-Little League Scandal Revisited

Do kids do better on tests if they get paid?

Michael Phelps to endorse Frosted Flakes

Flashback - Peyton Manning on SNL

Hockey Mom vs. Soccer Mom vs. Basketball Mom - A Unscientific Analysis

Palin for aerial wolf hunting

Sarah Palin, Sportscaster

Revenge of the Baseball Gods-Little League Scandal Revisited

Nastia Liukin's mom watches from the stands (video)

IOC orders investigation of Chinese Gymnast's age

Bela Karolyi likes to kill things

Vince Young is a mommas boy

Brett Singer — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 15:00:00 GMT

We're OK with that, by the way. But he kinda is, as this video shows.

Some background: Vince Young is an NFL quarterback. Following an amazing performance in the 2006 Rose Bowl, Young was selected 3rd overall in the NFL draft by the Tennessee Titans. Although he has won a fair amount of games, his playing has been criticized by football pundits and fans. Last week he was injured during the game and will be out for 2-4 weeks. Last Monday, he left his house and didn't take his cell phone with him, prompting worrying from his couch and others. In the past few days, there were various stories out there, including one that he may have been contemplating suicide. (It appears that this isn't true, but it's not entirely clear.) His mother said that he was tired of the criticism that goes with being a highly-paid NFL player; that's what he's referring to in this video.

What he says is that even when it's your money and your house, you still have to tell your mom where you're going. Hey, nothing wrong with that I guess.

Here's two videos: the first is the one where he says he needs to listen to his mom and the other is about the possibility that he may have been thinking about suicide. Or maybe not.

Vince Young: tell your momma where you're going

Therapist said Vince mentioned suicide (why is she telling this to reporters?)

image: Wikipedia

Flashback - Peyton Manning on SNL

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They say: Chinese baby formula is dangerous

Do kids do better on tests if they get paid?

Revenge of the Baseball Gods-Little League Scandal Revisited

33 year old mom wins silver medal, saves son from leukemia

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Egyptian woman gives birth to septuplets because she wanted a boy

Retarded movie boycott

Flashback - Peyton Manning on SNL

Brett Singer — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 01:40:00 GMT

As you await Michael Phelps' comedy debut on 'Saturday Night Live' tonight (remember Phelps? Swimmer guy? Won a bunch of medals a month ago, even though it feels like years have passed since the Olympics?), let us take a moment to recall another sports figure who hosted SNL: NFL quarterback Peyton Manning.

In this sketch, Peyton takes time out of his busy day to hang out with kids in need – something he maybe shouldn't be doing. He plays a little football ("Do you wanna lose? I throw, you catch. It's not that hard."), shares important life skills (like stealing cars), and teaches valuable lessons in sportsmanship (like making a kid sit in a porta-potty for dropping a pass.)

"Spend time with your kids – so Peyton doesn't." Good stuff. Hope Phelps gets good material to work with; he's not exactly a natural comedian. Peyton, however, is kinda funny.

Source: Hulu.com

Michael Phelps to endorse Frosted Flakes

Why the puppy games are better than the Olympics

33 year old mom wins silver medal, saves son from leukemia

Retarded movie boycott

They Say: no junk food ads at the Olympics

Upcoming Sesame Street Guests

Revenge of the Baseball Gods-Little League Scandal Revisited

Shawn Johnson, Democrat? (UPDATE: Now with video)

Nastia Liukin's mom watches from the stands (video)

Dara Torres inspired two current Olympians

IOC orders investigation of Chinese Gymnast's age

Bela Karolyi likes to kill things

Other Old Olympians

Volleyball hasn’t come a long way, baby

Palin family online - real or fake?

Brett Singer — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 19:45:00 GMT

If the Internet is to be believed, John McCain has chosen a running mate whose family life is just thisclose to being a full season of The Jerry Springer Show. However, as we all know, not everything you read (online or in print) is true.

So in the interest of being fair and balanced (ahem), we present to you a list of what we've found out regarding the veracity of the various blogs, photos and assorted Palin hoo-ha.

Levi Johnston's blog: FAKE
This is clearly fake, but amusing (well, slightly). The tone is pretty close to what was on Levi's now gone MySpace page.

Willow Palin's blog: Unknown
This one could be real but seems very fake to me. I haven't seen any official debunking of it but I can't imagine the Republicans would allow anyone in the Palin family unfettered blogging rights at this point.

Bristol Palin party pics: Unknown

If I had to guess, I would say that these are real. These shots are more than a little bit creepy since Bristol is 17, and may have been younger when these photos were taken. However, if they are real, she posted 'em. I really hope MySpace and the rest have gone the way of other dot-bombs by the time my kids are old enough to care about them. If not, I think I'm going to have a little chat about not posting any and all photos online for the world to ogle at.

Sarah Palin nude shots: FAKE
Let's go one by one:

SO fake. But funny.

The Naked Shot
Click here to see it (not safe for work). Nerve says this looks like Julia Louis Dreyfus, and after seeing the photo they link to, I kind of agree. HOWEVER, Snopes (a good source for all internet fakery) says even that one is a phony. Damn you, Photoshop!

This shot of Palin in a mini-skirt isn't too racy, although someone did Photoshop it onto a Playboy cover.

Alas, Snopes says that one is fake as well. They don't offer as much evidence of said fakery as they do for the other pics; all they have is a shot of Palin with the same facial expression, hairdo, etc. I’m not saying it's real, just saying the evidence isn't as compelling. It's probably fake.

Less widely circulated is this shot from GrizzlyBay.org of Governor Palin with, um, Vikings:

That one is real. I think.

So now y'all know who to vote for, right? What? This doesn't matter at all? Oh…

Images/Sources: Nerve, GrizzlyBay, Snopes, Facebook, et al.

Sarah Palin Nude?!

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Levi Johnston (aka: Mr. Bristol Palin) Meets McCain ... With Pics!

Political Nanny: Mr. Sarah Palin, Alaska 'First Dude'

Proof That Baby Trig Is NOT Sarah Palin's Son?!!

McCain, Palin oppose teen pregnancy aid and sex education

Can a Presidential Candidate Be a Family Man?

Palin’s Daughter’s Redneck Baby Daddy: “I Don’t Want Kids!”

'Palin Should Go Back to the Kitchen' and 4 More WTF Comments About the VP Pick

Introducing Young Mr. Bristol Palin

Trig and Bristol: Palin Family Names Run Amok

Political Nanny: Obama Tells Reporters to 'Back Off' Palin's Pregnant Daughter

McCain, Palin oppose teen pregnancy aid and sex education

Brett Singer — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 14:20:00 GMT

Ah, running for President. Everything you've ever done is fair game. But hey, stay out of their personal lives! But hang on – this is about their political views? Oh. Um. OK.

"Republican John McCain, whose running mate disclosed that her unmarried 17-year-old daughter is pregnant, has opposed proposals to spend federal money on teen-pregnancy prevention programs and voted to require poor teen mothers to stay in school or lose their benefits."

Palin herself wrote in a questionnaire during her gubernatorial campaign in 2006, "The explicit sex-ed programs will not find my support." (Not sure what she means by "explicit sex-ed" -- plaster genitalia are out, but bananas are cool? Use "va-jay-jay" and "hey-nonner-nonner" instead of the word "vagina"?)

Some have said this is a "karma's a bitch" situation, but that seems unfair to me. Stuff happens, regardless of your personal beliefs. At best, it's ironic (don'tcha think? Sorry, couldn't resist). One good result of this particular scrutiny is that it shines a spotlight on McCain's voting record, and also on statements made by Palin. That sort of information is what people should be basing their voting decisions on, not whether or not Ms. Palin would be better off at home making brownies, rather than running for veep.

source: Yahoo News

Sarah Palin, Sportscaster

Palin’s Daughter’s Redneck Baby Daddy: “I Don’t Want Kids!”

'Palin Should Go Back to the Kitchen' and 4 More WTF Comments About the VP Pick

Trig and Bristol: Palin Family Names Run Amok

Sarah Palin, Sportscaster

Brett Singer — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Before she entered politics, way back in 1988, Sarah Palin was known as Sarah Heath. She was, as you may have heard, a sports anchor for KTUU-TV in Anchorage, Alaska. Video was bound to surface eventually; I'm actually surprised it took this long.

It's not all that remarkable. She reads sports scores, makes less than snappy patter with an anchor that Deadspin describes as, "a weird amalgam of Ron Burgundy and Carl Monday," and she has big ol' 80's hair. There's also that voice, which I think is verrry close to Frances McDormand's in 'Fargo.'

Before I'm accused of "bashing" her, I'm not. That said, I think when the McCain campaign (McCampaign? Hmm...) tells us that she was a "journalist," that's pushing it a little bit.

Enjoy.

Source: Deadspin