Strollerderby : dora the explorer

What They're Babbling About: Skanks a Lot

JeanneSager — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 16:23:00 GMT

Don't you ever get sick of being the good mom and dad? Don't worry; we're not the only families who go slumming . . . case in point, this week's What They're Babbling About:

With the funniest take on the Dora skankification yet to hit the 'net, Upper Case Woman's diagrams put it all in righteously hilarious perspective. Pointy shoes, she points out, are very bad for exploring. Somehow we get that Dora's new explorations are going to be at the make-up counter. Sigh - Upper Case Woman

We're naughty parents who lurv to eat raw cookie dough. Unfortunately, it's a sin we don't want to the kids picking up on. Or we didn't - until we found this egg-free recipe from another naughty mother. Yum - Cafe Mom

And now that you've gobbled that down, the bad news - how sweet is too sweet? Sugar's evil twin gets its own expose. - SuperEco

Remember those nights when you drank till dawn and still popped out of bed looking ravishing? We don't either. So it's a good thing motherhood inspires moderation. - ParentDish

Come on, admit it, it's easier to chop your daughter's hair than let her walk around with a rat's nest up there. Yeah, that makes you lazy. Deliciously, sinfully lazy. - Scout's Honor

We didn't think there was anything more disgusting than your average pageant mom . . . until we saw this. - Jezebel

Sometimes a girl's just gotta know - and in this economy, well, does it matter how much you spent on the little stick you're going to pee on? Take this survey and see where you fall on the dollar store discount. - Lil Sugar

Image: PerezHilton

Dora Grows up—Stops Exploring, Starts Shopping

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 18:30:00 GMT

Yes, that toothpick-legged, sexy-haired silhouette to the right is the new Dora the Explorer.

According to Nickelodeon, an older, more fashionable Dora line—“featuring fashion dolls and accessories” (sold separately)—will be released in the fall and marketed to tween girls.

The new Dora will go to middle school in the big city and have a “whole new fashionable look.” The keystone of the new doll will be online play, in which kids can change Dora’s clothes and accessories—and also solve a mystery if they feel like it.

It’s no mystery why Nickelodeon would team up with Mattel to expand Dora the Explorer (cha-ching!), but did they really have to shamelessly transform Dora from a fearless outdoorswoman whose best friends are talking animals into a materialistic fashionista? Tween girls are bombarded with enough worries about clothes and appearance as it is.

Considering most children’s obsession with “big kids,” I’m worried that even three- and four-year-old lovers of Dora will be turned on to this stereotypical fashion doll, rather than following Dora and Boots on bilingual humanitarian missions in the great outdoors.

What do you think about the new Dora line--sad makeover, or a way for kids to maintain their connection with a powerful female character?

Image: businesswire.com

Also on Babble:

Liveblogging Toy Fair: Everything You Need to Know About Tween Dora

UPDATE: Time Warner and Viacom Reach Agreement, SpongeBob Saved

Brett Singer — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 03:52:00 GMT

The war has ended, and we are all winners -- the kids can watch Dora, the grown-ups can watch Colbert. Technically, the kids can also watch Colbert, and the grown-ups can even watch Dora.

Viacom and Time Warner have reached an agreement, terms to be fleshed out later, that will keep the various channels on the air for Time Warner Cable subscribers, according to the New York Times. Perhaps they took Dora's advice to "stop and think" for a minute.

One interesting idea did come from this, however, via the comments below: pay-per-minute television. I like it. They'll never DO it, but I like it. It would probably greatly reduce TV viewing in most households. "Hey kids, there's a Spider-Man marathon on! 65 episodes in a row!" (That was this morning, actually.) If you add, "It'll only cost us a dollar a minute!" I might just pick up a book, y'know?

Anyway, for now, everyone can keep watching their favorite shows. And thank goodness -- isn't there a new "Hills" spinoff? (Note: if there is, I don't know what it's called because I don't watch that show. But somebody must.)

Original post follows below:

*-*-*-*

If you get your TV service from Time Warner Cable and your kids love them some SpongeBob and Dora The Explorer, you might want to stock up on DVDs.

Viacom wants an increase in the fee Time Warner pays to carry their channels, and Time Warner doesn't want to pay it. The deadline is midnight tonight. What channels are those? A partial list: Nickelodeon, MTV, VH-1, Comedy Central. So no Diego for the kiddies, and no Daily Show and Colbert Report for you. (Or for your kids, if they enjoy a humorous take on current events.)

Unsurprisingly, both sides think they are right. In a press release, Viacom says the following: " Ultimately…if Nickelodeon, COMEDY CENTRAL, MTV and the rest of our programming is discontinued - over less than a penny per day – we believe viewers will see this behavior by their cable company as outrageous." The fee increase Viacom is asking for is "about 25 cents a month, or $3 a year, per subscriber for its package of channels," according to the LA Times. Time Warner says its about Viacom trying to make up for decreased ad revenue: the LA Times quotes Time Warner Cable spokesman Alex Dudley as saying, "Advertising revenue stinks so they are looking to stick our customers for the difference. We have to hold the line for our customers. They are holding our customers hostage for a bunch of networks with sagging ratings and only one or two good channels."

Personally, I've felt for years that it should be possible to pick and choose which channels you actually want to receive. For example, Comedy Central, sure. But no one in my house watches Nickelodeon, so that one can go. Of course, that's not how it works. Oh well.

The thing is, while both sides may or may not have valid points in this matter, customers don't really care. It's not like Time Warner will offer refunds if they drop the Viacom channels from their lineup (although I suppose they might if it lasts long enough). But I think it you ask cable customers, the vast majority would say that they pay too much for their service. Take away channels that they actually want to watch, and that makes it even worse. It's two rich companies fighting with each other over more money, and while they fight, I don’t get to watch "The Hills." (Note: I don't actually watch "The Hills." That's just an example.)

Anyway, midnight tonight. If Viacom and Time Warner can't come to an agreement by then, bye-bye Dora and Jon Stewart. Let's see what happens.

Source: LATimes

Disney Bails on Narnia

Miss Piggy Wants a Bailout For Christmas

Dora the Conservative

Brett Singer — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 14:15:00 GMT

Every now and then Republicans do something to remind the world why anyone would ever want to vote for them. Also, sometimes elected officials sound like children's television characters.

What the hell am I talking about?

CNN reports that, "House conservatives urged Congress on Tuesday to 'take a breath' and consider other alternatives before rushing to pass a $700 billion plan to bail out Wall Street, a measure the White House says must pass by the end of the week."

Some Republicans are saying, hey. Guys. Let's look at things a little bit more closely before we commit close to one TRILLION dollars (insert Dr. Evil finger here) and potentially make a bad problem even worse.

That advice… it sounds familiar… where have I heard it before?

Oh! That's right. Dora The Explorer. She likes to "stop and think" when things start moving too fast. Hmmm…

Source: CNN, image: commonsensemedia, plus Photoshop

Sarah Palin, Sportscaster

Palin family online - real or fake?

Palin for aerial wolf hunting

Palin's Email Hacked and posted online; UPDATE: Anonymous Hacker Speaks

Was Trig Palin drugged?

McCain said lipstick on a pig to Hillary

Are your kids aware of the election?

So – who ya voting for?

Morning News: Nope, No Improvements. Nation Still Falling Apart.

Nanny Market Shaken Up By Current Financial Woes

Shawn Johnson, Democrat? (UPDATE: Now with video)

Beau Biden almost made me cry

McCain, Palin oppose teen pregnancy aid and sex education

Elizabeth Edwards slammed for keeping hubby's affair a secret

Man ejected from Yankee Stadium for lack of patriotism

Dadcentric endorses Obama

7 year old on terrorist list

Another 8 year old on the terrorist watch list

Awww…a baby otter… (when the going gets tough, the tough go and look at pictures of baby animals)

PBS Dropping Mister Rogers??!!

Cole Gamble — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 23:45:00 GMT

The bible tells us there are a number of clear and distinct signs the apocalypse is coming. Plague, pestilence, famine and the cancelation of Mister Rogers Neighborhood.

How could this happen? PBS has announced its plans to pull the venerable 40 year old show from their weekday schedule. While not a full on cancelation, MRN (that’s what we “Neighborheads” in the know call it) will be relegated to a single episode on the weekends.But there’s something you can do to save it.

It’s is hard, no, impossible to imagine the landscape of children’s educational television without looking at Mister Roger’s Neighborhood as the forbearer of all that has come since. In its time it was revolutionary, though revolutionary might seem an odd term for a snail’s pace TV program featuring the world’s most soft-spoken, cardigan loving gentleman. What Mister Rogers cared about most was healthy child development and giving kids the tools to look with hope and confidence upon a world that often inspires neither. That’s still a foreign concept to some.

But don’t strap on that black armband for just yet Mister Roger’s devotee Brian Linder has stared SaveMisterRogers.com an effort to reverse PBS’s decision. Go there now to find out how you can help keep MRN on. Need a little more motivation? Here’s Mister Rogers to tell you how proud he is of you.

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Walkie-Talkie Teaches 3-Year-Old About Drugs and Sex

Jen Chaney — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 15:33:00 GMT

Deborah Pancaro's three-year-old son recently heard some weird stuff on his toy walkie-talkie. First he heard some guys saying "10-4." Then he picked up some chatter about marijuana and plans to visit a strip club.

“They said we should go smoke some weed, and were talking about being in a strip bar, some really explicit things,” Pancaro told the Associated Press.

Turns out the Diego walkie-talkie the West Virginia mom bought at Wal-Mart was intercepting -- you guessed it -- truckers talking via CB radio. (Either that, or it was picking up dialogue from "Pineapple Express.") Pancaro sent a letter to Fisher-Price, manufacturer of the product, asking them to either recall it or fix the toy so it won't be so sensitive to interference. A spokeswoman for Fisher-Price says the company has tried to call Pancaro twice to no avail. Meanwhile, the Wal-Mart Web site says the walkie-talkie has been discontinued. No word on whether the boy has developed a sudden interesting in visiting a place called The Bada Bing.

Neither Diego nor his cousin, Dora the Explorer, had any comment on the matter. When approached by a reporter, Baby Jaguar said he didn't have time to talk because he was really busy trying to score some weed.

(Kidding! Kidding!)

The 20 Best Kids Movies

Cole Gamble — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 15:00:00 GMT

So what are the best kids movies of all time? You can find them neatly compiled here at Entertainment Weekly. Agree? Disagree? What do you think should have made the list and what should be torn from the list immediately? Here’s my question: do adults have any business deciding what makes a great kids movie? If there is anything I have learned from my 4-year-old it is she and I have a difference in opinion when it comes to children’s entertainment. I am always trying to direct her toward shows like The Backyardigans and Yo Gabba Gabba because I think they are actually pretty jazzy, clever, and in the case of Yo Gabba Gabba delightfully absurd (read: bizarre). However, Jillian turns her nose up at these suggestions in deference for Dora and Diego. Nothing against Dora, but compared to The Backyardigans she can’t carry a tune. So, do the pop culture hipsters at Entertainment Weekly have it right? Would your six-year-old sit through to Kill A Mockingbird?

Is TV Bad For Kids??

Cole Gamble — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 15:21:00 GMT

We all do it, let our kids watch TV. Well, accept you Amish, with your luxurious quilts, delicious fried chicken and inability to read these very words. Sure, we limit the kids to Noggin and Sprout, but I think most parents still wonder what effect that television watching is having. Yeah, the value of Baby Einstein, for instance, is not quite as advertised. But is it all really bad for baby? Well now the results are in… I do like how this article begins, “Here's an issue your parents never had to consider: the great babies-and-TV debate.” Was I born during the depression? Did my parents have to curb my “radio fever” as I glued my ear to the crystal set for new episodes of “The Shadow”? Maybe the author means parents didn’t have to debate it back then because in the seventies parents were just jerks. The particulars of this piece, and whether or not TV will rot your child, boil down to this: Kids under 2 won’t learn a thing. If you’re pumping them full of “educational” shows, you’re just spinning your wheels. TV won’t hurt them either. Granted, all things in moderation, but there is no evidence that TV will cook your child’s brain. It’s for you, not for them. You are not doing the kids a big favor by popping in a DVD while you pop a tranquilizer. Pacifying the kids on Dora is all about you, so be honest with yourself. The part I found most interesting was the section on background TV and how it may affect attention spans. Throughout my entire childhood there was always a TV on. Even now when I go to my dad’s house for dinner the TV is playing right over my shoulder. When I have chores around the house, I often turn on the TV like other people put on music. Now and then I catch myself in the act and feel and it’s rather sad. I have what I consider a low ability to concentrate, and though this anecdotal evidence isn’t a smoking gun, I wonder what effect all that ambient TV had on me. At the very least, I think a constantly blaring TV could be distracting a child from more imaginative play. What do you think? Is your TV on morning, noon and night? Are your kids addicted?

Top 9 Puzzling Dora Toys

Adrienne Martini — Wed, 05 Mar 2008 18:00:00 GMT

Ah, Dora the Explorer. So innocent. So carefree. So NSFW.

The number one puzzling toy on our list has to be the Dora Aquapet. Did anyone run this design past a kid over the age of ten? And do any of the Aquapet's owners wonder why it keeps ending up in Mommy's nightstand?

The rest of the puzzling toys after the jump.

2) Mmmmm...Dora's eyeballs sure are tasty after you bake them in the oven.

3) For the parent who wants to ensure her kid is beaten up every day at recess, there is the Dora fanny pack.

4) Sometimes, the jokes write themselves: The Fantasy Swirl Castle with Balls.

5) The Dora Knows Your Name Cell Phone. It gets its information from the CIA.

6) A 3-foot tall doll with an enormous head? Sure. That's not creepy at all.

7) The Dora Bounce Buddy Talking Trampoline. When you care enough to induce a head injury.

8) Oral or rectal? The Dora digital thermometer goes both ways.

9) Dora's Talking Cash Register says "Gracias for all of the dough! Have some more crap with my picture on it!"

10 Worst Toys of 2007!

Karen Murphy — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 15:33:00 GMT

Oh yes, the year isn't complete until this list comes out. Compiled by World Against Toys Causing Harm, Inc. (W.A.T.C.H), which should totally have been on Get Smart, the annual Ten Worst Toys is a list of the toys (also known as the What the Fuck Were They Thinking? Awards) that have the most potential to cause childhood injuries or even death to children. Ready for the list?

1. Go, Diego, Go! Animal Rescue Boat. Covered with lead. Don't lick it.

2. Sticky Stones. Magnetic "stones": how many ways can these be wrong? They're a choking hazard and they're magnets which cause all sorts of problems (like death) if swallowed. Avoid.

3. Jack Sparrow's Spinning Dagger. Hard plastic dagger straps to a kid's wrist and spins. You're gonna poke your eye out, kid.

4. Dora the Explorer Lamp. Problem is, kids are instructed to unplug it when not in use. Otherwise? It's a fire, shock, and burn hazard. Yeah, somebody was thinking there, eh?

5. Lil "Giddy Up" Horse Sassy Pet Saks. Also wins Worst Name Award. But the tag on the horse states it's for newborns while the tag on the carrier says it's for toddlers 18 months and older. Huh? Plus, the wooden bead on it is chokable as are the long fibers of the fur. Bleh.

6. Spider Man 3 New Goblin Sword. The sword part extends swiftly from the handle when a button is pushed. Kind of like an automatic umbrella, and I don't see those being complained about (yet they're not sold expressly for kids, those umbrellas). You're gonna poke your eye out, kid.

7. Hip Hoppa. It's a foot board attached atop a ball. Clearly, a fair amount of falling will be involved. Don't hit your head on the hard pavement, 'kay?

8. B'loonies Party Pack. Put a gob of molten chemical waste on the end of a tube and blow: instant balloons! Sort of. I have owned these, and they're kind of lame. Apparently, that toxic chemical waste can also be aspirated if the kid forgets which way to blow. Oh, and it's, uh, flammable. Not to mention emits toxic fumes.

9. My Little Baby Born. Aww, cute baby doll comes with a pacifier that's detachable and you KNOW your kid is going to put it in their own mouth = choking hazard.

10. Rubber Band Shooter. You're gonna shoot your eye out, kid.

Things Fall Apart: Huge Mattel Recall!

Karen Murphy — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 13:07:00 GMT

A massive recall has been initiated by toy company Mattel this week, and there's an excellent chance that one of the affected toys is in your home if you have a toddler pining for Elmo or Dora. Almost a million toys were affected (One! Million! Toys!), although 2/3 of those were stopped at the retail level from reaching consumers when Mattel contacted toy sellers like Wal-Mart and Toys 'R Us to halt sales of the lead-covered toys.

These aren't the cheap little dollar-store toys we usually talk about that have been recalled; nope, these are highly visible, could-be-in-your-home toys.

Here's a list of all the affected toys.

Apparently Nickelodeon and Sesame Workshop, who license the characters Dora and Elmo respectively, will be initiating third-party product testing to ensure something like this doesn't happen again. While that's probably a relief to toddlers everywhere, it doesn't speak to the larger problem of outsourcing in a country that may or may not share the same safety regulations as the countries it exports to.

And at the consumer level, we have no way of knowing where that cat food, those tires, or those toys were made, and whether they might ultimately be harmful because of either inadvertently or willfully relaxed safety standards. Which means we are relying on our own government and the largesse of companies that profit from what we buy to protect us and our children from harm.

Ugh. Right now I feel like crawling into a cave.

Alec Baldwin Just Wont Quit, Screams at Dora

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Mon, 30 Apr 2007 12:10:00 GMT

Now Alec Baldwin is royally pissed at Dora. Yelling at your daughter on voicemail? That I can understand. Sure, she's only 11, but she should really be more considerate. Parental alienation is no laughing matter.

But yelling at beloved Dora the Explorer? Now I fear Baldwin has gone too far.

[via Daddy Types]

¿Can You Say Parodia? SNL Skewers "Dora"

Patti — Thu, 29 Mar 2007 23:31:00 GMT

I know in my heart that SNL animator Robert Smigel's take on "Dora The Explorer" would have been funnier to me if Dora and her friends weren't such a serious and integral part of my children's ~~education~~ entertainment. But as it was, I watched this clip with just a little more discomfort than I would have a few years ago when the sum total of my Dora experience was limited to a few moments here and there while babysitting.

After reviewing it for questionable content, I let my four-year-old watch it with me. She took it straight, only noting that "that's not the usual Boots". And for her money, that's a girl in the picture FauxDora holds up.

I'm going to watch it again later tonight after I come home from Mama's Night Out, and I suspect with a couple of mojitos under my belt, it'll be hilarious.

Via Time's Tuned In blog

Toys That Make You Go "WTF???"

Patti — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 18:36:00 GMT

Every now and then a toy hits the market that makes you wonder what kind of crack people who make and distribute toys are smoking. At StromDotCom, a short list of such toys. It includes the infamous Harry Potter Vibrating Broom and the dildo-like Dora Aquapet, along with other unintentionally hilarious or just plain bizarre playthings, but fails to include the Super Soaker Oozinator, whose original commercial you can see below.