Strollerderby : Lesbians

Genetic Mom Gets OK to Adopt Baby Carried by Partner

JeanneSager — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 13:31:00 GMT

It happens every day - kids get adopted. In forward thinking parts of the country, they even get adopted by members of same sex couples.

But this was a first. A woman who supplied an egg so her female partner could carry their baby has secured the right to adopt her own genetic child - and there was no dispute between the two parties. No divorce, no acrimony. This was all about protecting the child.

Surprised this hasn't happened before? Me too. Same sex couples carrying each other's eggs is not exactly new - celebrity chef Cat Cora and her wife just made news a few months ago because they're both pregnant, and both carrying a fetus made from the opposite's eggs.

But where a woman carrying a baby with sperm donated by her husband via IVF wouldn't have a problem naming him as legal father of the child, too many states still deny same sex couples the ability to name their spouse as the baby's legal parent. Which is why Mona A., the egg donor in this case, petitioned to be named son Sebastian's legal mother shortly after his birth in 2008.

Mona and wife Ingrid A. were legally married in the Netherlands shortly after the country legalized same sex marriage. Their marriage is recognized in some states, where Mona is automatically afforded the rights as parent of the baby her wife delivered. But in other states, where the Defense of Marriage Act reigns supreme, their marriage means little in the eyes of the law - and Mona would be denied her rights as Sebastian's mom.

It was in the best interest of their son that Mona and Ingrid made this petition. It's in imperfect solution to the fight to have their marriage recognized, but it's what they have done to ensure they can both provide for their child.

According to the judge who presided over the case, "Sebastian's genetic mother has other potential legal avenues: first, to be listed on Sebastian's birth certificate; second ... to execute a statutorily prescribed acknowledgment of paternity [filiation]; and third, to obtain a judicial order of filiation."

But Judge Kristin Booth Glen didn't have jurisdiction to secure any of those options for Mona. What she could do was grant an adoption, making both Ingrid and Mona Sebastian's legal parents. Glen says it's the first time a court has had to look at whether two women can be listed on a birth certificate when one is the gestational mother and the second the genetic mother. Although certain states already grant that both members of a same sex couple earn equal legal status as parents, this is the first that takes into account genetics and egg donation.

I am happy for Mona and Ingrid that their case was successful, and I understand that they were doing this in order to retain Mona's rights across state lines. However, it's pathetic that this the means two women have to go through to ensure they both have rights to their own child. Moving to Arkansas or Oklahoma or any other Defense of Marriage BS state is not going to make Mona any less genetically tied to this child. No more so than a move across state lines would make a man's genetic "donation" into a baby any less potent.

But I guess I'm not taking into account that this sweet little baby boy is demon spawn in Arkansas or Oklahoma. . .

Image: Best Quality Wallpapers

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JeanneSager — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 16:32:00 GMT

A Missouri lawmaker has been told she was kept off of a House committee on children and families because other members found her "offensive."

What's offensive? That she's a lesbian?

Democratic Rep. Jeanette Mott Oxford was nominated by her party last month to serve on the Special Standing Committee on Children and Families in the Missouri House. But the Republican house speaker, Ron Richard, ignored the party's request and chose another Democrat.

But Rep. Mike Corcoran, who got the nod, says he expressed an interest in the seat only after being told Oxford was out of the running. He thought she made a good pick. Which leads Oxford back to her big question.

Is the head of the Republicans in the Missouri house saying a lesbian can't help on a committee that serves children and families? Ironic, considering one of only two openly gay lawmakers in the house, Oxford HAS served on committees relating to kids and families since she was elected in 2004. Before that, she served as executive director of ROWEL, a St. Louis organization that advocates for the poor with a focus on changes to the welfare system. One of its biggest claims to fame in Missouri? ROWEL advocated for increases in cash grants for Aid to Families with Dependent Children.

The House minority leader - who put forth Oxford's name for the appointment - is also confused; Richard accepted other party suggestions - and he hasn't given her a clear answer either.

It all sounds fishy to me, especially when you look at the list of bills sponsored by Oxford in her time in the House - everything from establishing lower class sizes in St. Louis city and county schools to expanding the amount of kosher foods available under the state's Women, Infants and Children (WIC) program.

Sounds like this is a lady who knows kids and families. Funny thing a lot of homophobic house speakers haven't realized - lesbians are parts of families too. And once upon a time, they were kids. Which makes them just as qualified for a post on a committee that deals with kids and families as anyone else - especially when they have a long history of advocating for . . . kids and families.

Image: Jeanette Mott Oxford's Blogspot

Protect Children: Prohibit Divorce

Protect Children: Prohibit Divorce

JeanneSager — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 17:54:00 GMT

Since Californians who voted for Prop 8 late last year to strike down the rights of gays to marry said they were doing it for the children, there's a new movement afoot to keep kids safe:

Prohibit divorces. All of them. Keep heterosexual couples from breaking the bonds of holy matrimony.

After all - the sanctity of marriage and the children were at the heart of Prop 8, right?

A petition over at the Petition Site already has seven thousand some signatures, folks who signed their names to a letter proposing that divorce be stricken from the books to "keep the interests of children and families intact."

The marriage of a man and a woman has been at the heart of society since the beginning of time and it promotes the ideal opportunity for children to be raised by a mother and a father in a family held together by the legal, communal, and spiritual bonds of marriage. As a society we should put the best interests of children first, and those interests lie in traditional marriage. Permitting divorce destroys marriage as we know it and causes a profound harm to society. We should be restoring marriage, not undermining it.

Starting to sound familiar? Take out the word "divorce" and slip in "gay marriage."

Yup, they stole the whole thing from the Prop 8 folks over at ProtectMarriage.com; you know, the folks who warned Californians that "schools will now be required to teach students that gay marriage is the same as traditional marriage, starting with kindergarteners." (sic)

I'd love to say they won't be able to weasel out of their own words, but as the masters of twisting things to send people running scared of "the gay," I'm betting the evangelicals will have a field day with this one too. Only this time, the joke truly is on them.

Image: ThePetitionSite

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Pregnant Man Receiving Death Threats

Cole Gamble — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 20:00:00 GMT

I guess you could file this under, “Sometimes Human Beings Are Miserable Creatures.” As you probably know, Oregon’s (my neck of the woods) Thomas Beatie, A.K.A The Pregnant Man, is pregnant again. And for this grievous offense, some people want him dead…

Not that death threats are the only troubles Beatie and his wife Nancy have weathered. Of course you have the mockery of kooks, regular citizens and late night talk show hosts. Then you have FOX News. During Beatie’s first pregnancy, a FOX News commentator declared Beatie’s child would be an “Ewok Baby” and that it would be born with a “third eye.” Yep, those words from the reputable, “Fair and Balanced,” journalistic institution that is FOX News.

People are bound to find Beatie and his life weird, perhaps gross, maybe even go so far as to deem it “wrong.” I don’t begrudge regular people for making water cooler talk out of this person’s life; we’re all a little catty deep down. And I’ll admit he played a part in stepping into the spotlight. But death threats? I don’t get why who he is and how he lives his life could make anyone that mad, why they find it so necessary to wipe out all that is unique and interesting about this world. Then again, there’s a lot I don’t get. I was taught to believe this was a country of individuality, where everyone is free, nay, encouraged to make their own path. So if somebody decides to live a certain way and it doesn’t hurt anyone, who the hell cares?

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Queer Spawn Make Better Teens?

Shannon LC Cate — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 01:16:00 GMT

Teenaged kids of lesbian moms are doing as well or better than peers, according to the National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study conducted by Dr. Nanette Gartrell of the University of California-San Francisco. Not only did the study find that the kids in the 79 families still in the study (which started with 84) have higher social competence and lower overall "problem behavior" than the general population of their peers, it also found 80% of them rating their lives as enjoyable and satisfying which, I don't need to tell you, is not typical of teens.

Apparently, the nuances of these responses correlated with how the schools these kids attended handled homophobic incidents. The better the handling of the issue, the better adjusted the children from lesbian families reported themselves to be. It goes to show you that society's homophobia, not same-sex parents themselves, are the probable cause of any sexual-orientation-related trouble our children have.

I found some of the responses a bit implausible, however, such as a finding that of the kids reporting sexual activity of their own (again, less than the general population) 100% of this was opposite-sex activity. Though the researcher says she believes the self-reporting kids are being honest, I have to wonder if they aren't also heavily influenced by the sense of responsibility Abigail Garner found when she interviewed the adult children of same-sex parents for her book, Families Like Mine: Children of Gay Parents Tell it Like it Is. Garner discovered that children with queer parents felt the need to prove to the world that they were normal and healthy and sometimes, most of all, heterosexual. It seems the worst fear outsiders have about same-sex parenting is that we'll turn our kids gay and enough of us have enough internalized homophobia to worry about it ourselves. Could be that a group of 17-year olds aren't ready to break away from protecting the family image enough to admit they are experimenting as much as the rest of the population?

But overall, the study's findings are encouraging. Given all the legal and financial drawbacks to having a lesbian family, a little break during the teen years seems fair enough.

Photo by dellafels

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They Say: Sarah Palin is not a Lesbian (Nope, not Even a Lipstick Lesbian)

Shannon LC Cate — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 20:00:00 GMT

An unnamed source told Ian Undercover, Ian undercover told PageOneQ, PageOneQ told Mombian and I'm telling you.

Shhh, come closer...

It seems John McCain wanted Condaleeza Rice for his veep, but Condi is too gay for the job. To be perfectly honest, I knew that already. Every lesbian who's lived in DC has heard about her girlfriend hanging out in certain sapphic social venues and making no bones about their relationship. So when I read the latest gossip I thought "ah-ha! That's what happened!" Because really, Sarah Palin? I mean, Sarah Palin?? Really, seriously, Sarah Palin???

Much as McCain wanted Condi--apparently to steal just a smidgeon of the Black vote and/or the woman vote from Obama--the republican puppet masters wouldn't have it, what with Rice's not-so-secret history of co-ownership of large assets with one Randy Bean who, in spite of her misleading name, has a uterus.

The question remains, how did the decision to replace Rice with Palin come about? Wouldn't you like to have been a fly on that wall?

Brilliant PhD with a specialty in the former Soviet Union?"

"No."

"Years of foreign policy experience including much public and international defense of the Bush Doctrine?"

"No."

"African-American?"

"No."

"Female?"

"Yes."

"Homosexual?"

"Certainly not."

"Sold! The American people will barely notice the difference, I'm sure."

I guess if Rice really wanted to be VP when she grew up she ought to have married a womanizing southern governor like other sisters the grapevine whispers about...

The Most Powerful Lesbian Moms in America

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah — Tue, 10 Apr 2007 12:06:00 GMT

Who are the most powerful lesbian moms in the United States? Out Magazine published an article on The Power 50. It was an article on the most powerful gay men and women in America. This article not only informed me that David Geffen and Anderson Cooper were gay (I'm the only person who didn't know that, aren't I?) but also prompted a great post on Mombian on who they thought were the most influential lesbian mommies in America.

So who would you think? Rosie O'Donnell seemed obvious, as did Mary Cheney (mom to be) and her partner Heather Roe. The head of The National Center for Lesbian Rights, Kate Kendall and Sandy Holmes aren't surprising nor were Kara Swisher and Megan Smith.

So who wasn't I expecting to make the list? Melissa Etheridge and Tammy Lynn Michaels. After I read it, it made sense. I know they are very activist and probably raise a lot of money. But how about Sheryl Swoopes and Alisa Scott? Not only did I not know they were a couple, but I hadn't thought about either of their sexual orientations and I didn't know they had a child. (Okay, I looked it up and they are raising Swoopes son from a previous marriage together.)

There are many more on their list. Did they miss anyone?

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