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  • They Say: Swimming Pools? Yeah, They're Kind Of Gross

    Memorial Day weekend is traditionally the kick-off of the summer season at most community pools around the country. But after reading this post, you may be a little less enthusiastic about taking the kids for their inaugural dip.

    It may not exactly surprise anyone to learn that swimming pools aren't the most sanitary places in the world. But my eyebrows raised a little when I read this CNN.com story that says a recent study conducted by the Water Quality and Health Council revealed that 17 percent of adults sometimes pee in the pool. Let me get this straight: these are adults who (I.P.) freely admitted to a group that studies water quality that they sometimes let a little leak out when they're practicing their butterfly strokes? That leads me to believe that perhaps even more adults who participated in this survey may do the same thing, but simply weren't honest when asked. Translation: every time you think you're just going swimming, you're actually splashing around in a big, festering, germ-filled community toilet.

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  • 9 Steps to Keep Your Kid from Ruining a Wedding - Part II


    7) Most wedding parties get their pictures done right after the ceremony is over.  It is a long very boring process, especially for kids. I recommend really hooking your children your children up under this particular circumstance. Don't just bring a juice box and a banana. Tide them over with big time junk food (no Cheetos--think tux black and neon Cheeto orange) and maybe a little candy. This will occupy them for a bit while they wait their turn. Dollar store trinkets also work pretty well to distract them for a few minutes, until they break them.

    8) The reception can be a bit tricky.  Many of the guests will want to see you little gems, so they'll have to go for the beginning.  But just an hour into the reception and your kid is definitely spinning. It may be well into their bedtime. Think about having a babysitter arranged at home or the hotel, then whisk the little time bombs discretely and hurry back before anyone notices you’re gone.

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  • 9 Steps to Keep Your Kid from Ruining a Wedding

    1) If the bride is in hysterics before the wedding, remove the kid from the situation.  She might want to offer the bride her gummy, hair covered lollypop in consolation. Or more likely your kid will tug out the bride’s delicately done hair while the lady bawls. Brides do not need the added stress and neither do you!

    4) While at the rehearsal, the night before, I'd not have the children too involved (i.e. getting the aisle walk just right.) Make sure to tell them that there will be some people, some of which, they'll know in the audience.  Give them the go ahead to wave and be friendly.  That might take away some of the stage fright.  The bride will be way back in line, her heart beating out of her chest, and she'd never know if your children showed off a bit or, you know, stopped to take a piss on the carpet.

     

     

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  • 5 Disturbing Summer Toys

    Small World Hydro Blast Tower Summer is here and now is the time to stock up on those gawdy plastic water toys that will turn your backyard into a hellish prison of PCBs and lead.  Not really.  Kids only need a hose and a bucket and some free time to think the world is one big wondrous adventure. That's why we love them so.

    Nevertheless, here are 4 very strange and disturbing summer toys and 1 disturbing swimsuit that our kids will be better off without:

     

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