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  • Sisters Better than Brothers? We Have Proof

    Finally, a study proves what sisters everywhere have always known - our brothers are so lucky to have us!

    It turns out people who grew up with sisters are more likely to be happy and emotionally settled than anyone else. Those of us stuck with, er, who grew up with, brothers, received a "less positive affect."

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  • Mom Sells Daughter's Soul to a British Tabloid - Figuratively Speaking

    There are days go by when your kids drive you nuts, no question. But do you ever stop loving them? 

    If you did, would you tell a British tabloid?

    Shelley Price got the burden of eleven years off her chest to the Daily Mail this week, telling the paper she just can't bring herself to love the little girl she had with an ex-boyfriend eleven years ago.

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  • Mom Bites Kid, Mom Goes to Jail

    No wonder our kids are so miserable to be around when they’re teething – those suckers are sharp. And no one knows it better than us – their parents. Because they like to bite US.

     

    But if you’ve ever considered sinking your teeth into a chubby little hand to show them just what it feels like, listen up: A 28-year-old mom in England was sentenced to five months in jail this week. Her crime? She bit her 5-year-old.

     

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  • How to Annoy Your Sister: Advertise on Craigslist

    It’s the stuff of family lore – the time sibling rivalry reared back its ugly head and cut a chunk out of my brother’s hair. Hey, it wasn’t my fault – he fell into the scissors.

     

    Where there are two children with the same parents, nine times out of ten, there are fights. To those of you who shared bon bons and bon mots with your siblings, goody, goody for you. The rest of us would like to plant our butts on your hip and fart. You ought to know what it feels like – we definitely do.

     

    One sister in New York City must have had her fair share of gas passed in her general direction. Her brother issued a Craigslist wanted ad for a girlfriend last week – specifically one who would annoy the piss out of his sister. (Read the whole ad here.)

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  • When You Can’t Stand Your Sibling’s Parenting Style

    Today a friend of mine called me to ask advice about if, and how, to deal with the fact that her brother’s parenting style was seriously tainting her enjoyment of auntie-hood. A lot of us have been there: you love your brother and you love his kids. You’re just a bit concerned that your beloved brother is spoiling your beloved nephew rotten. It’s no easier to be on the other side of a parental clash with a sibling, dealing with a big sister who thinks you could use a lot of unsolicited advice. “You mean you let him eat food that’s not organic?!” Or: “Just give him some chocolate milk and turn on Baby Einstein. That always kept my Steve quiet.”

    As this blog on parentdish.com points out, the general rule of thumb with friends is to not give parenting advice unless it’s asked for. But with our siblings, it’s not as clear cut.

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  • Movin' On Up (To A Big Kid Bed)

    With a newly-arrived second child and three bedrooms in our house, late last year we had to do the ritual all parents of more than one dread – making way for the new baby and moving the soon-to-be sibling to a big kid bed.

    I'd resisted moving my daughter out of her crib long after many of her friends had done so, because she likes to be on the move and I thought no way in hell would she stay in a real bed. I declared I would keep her in the crib until college if I could, but the twin realizations that 1) she was getting so tall that the next growth spurt would render her out of room in there and 2) that baby I felt flipping around in my belly would be out soon and need a place to sleep caused me to suck it up and get her big girl room ready.

    And surprisingly, it was fine. So I read this column in Newsday with a certain "there but for the grace of God go I" interest.

     

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  • Dialing Down the Negativity

    We've all been guilty of this – or okay, maybe it's just me – saying something negative in your child's hearing. "She is such a three-year-old, I am losing my mind today." "It's okay. I didn't like school either." "Clowns are terrifying."

    Turns out? Not such a good idea. When your kid hears you assigning certain traits to them or reinforcing a fear or negative feeling they have, it sticks in their head as truth. Sucks to be so influential, doesn't it?

    Now I don’t agree with this columnist's assertion, that if you ask other parents for help with a problem you're having with your child in their hearing, that you give them the idea you don’t know what you're doing. Of course, I am only the parent of a three-year-old, who still thinks I can conjure up Pirate's Booty and new episodes of Dora out of thin air because I am just that cool.

     

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  • Yes, Mom Did Like You Best

    New research seems to support the theory that parents tend to favor the oldest sibling in the family. Suddenly, all of those holidays where your older brother got all of the good gifts while you got nothing but dryer lint suddenly make sense, eh?

    Not so fast.

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  • Sibling Rivalry Still Alive and Kicking. And Biting.

    kids fightingThe bickering starts right after everyone is home from school. They're cranky, they're hungry, they're transitioning, whatever. And if not headed off at the pass, soon they're at each other's throats. Every. Damn. Day. Sound familiar? It should:

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  • What Your Kid Does to Burn 150 Calories

    kid screamingSo we all know and agree now that kids today are getting fatter and fatter. So it follows that getting your kids off the couch and doing something is good for them, right? There are a lot of things they probably already do that will easily burn off that handful of Doritos or Oreos, fun things like roller skating or throwing a ball around that they already enjoy.

    It's a little-known fact, then, that there are a whole lot more things your kids are already doing that burn off enormous amounts of energy, if only the energy that is expended when you reach for another Sibling Rivalry. Each of these activities is worth approximately 150 calories:

    • whining, 17 minutes
    • repeating "Are we almost there?" 113 times (in a 22-minute period)
    • pinching of sibling, 11 reps
    • arm-twisting of sibling, 4 reps
    • dumping out all the Legos
    • stepping around Legos without picking any up, 3 days
    • repeating, "...but he started it!" 8 times
    • screaming, 1 minute

     I'm guessing your kids are actually in better shape than you had thought.  I know mine are.


  • Hitting the Bottle: The Sibling Rivalry

    cocktail cherryAlong about 5:30, when Curious George is over and the faux truce (read: trancelike stupor) it induces has worn away, the battles begin in earnest at my house. "She did it!" "He did it first!" [thwack] [owww! Mamaaaaa!], followed by, "What's for dinner?" This of course causes me to start looking around for something to anaesthetize the incredible pain that results from ripping out my eyelids in an attempt to ignore the melee around me.

    In other words, it's time for a Sibling Rivalry:

    • 1 part orange juice
    • 1 part grapefruit juice*
    • 1 part Cointreau. Or maybe make that 2 parts.
    • 1 part grenadine

    Pour juices into a Martini glass, because I like those. Who doesn't instantly feel better when sipping something from a Martini glass? Add Cointreau and mix. Or use another method. It's really all about pleasing yourself, really. That and the alcohol. Pour the grenadine into the center and garnish with a cherry, because I like cherries. 

    * yeah, yeah, I know what I said about grapefruit juice. I'm so internally conflicted. Hence the rivalry. 

     


  • Sibling Rivalry Sucks

    sibling rivalryOh, even the title of this article is making me angry: "Cooperation will help children get along better." Right. Know-it-alls. You know that whoever wrote this article doesn't actually have children, because in my experience, the only way to stop sibling rivalry is to not have siblings.

    I think that kids are hardwired to compare themselves to their siblings. Comparing with parents is pretty fruitless until they become teenagers and by then we all look pretty lame by comparison, but up until then we're like gods to our kids, and who can compare to a god? Nope, that older brother or younger sister is much more accessible, or at least is closer to being human.

    And with the comparisons come the obvious competitions. Today in my house they played Who Can Hold Their Breath the Longest and discussed how many times they could chew a single bite of watermelon before it disintegrated (23). And somehow as a parent I'm responsible for this? I hardly think so.

    Nor do I think I can really fix it. I think I'll just invest in a good set of earplugs and let them work it out. Unless you've got any solutions?


  • Guaranteed To Kick-Start Sibling Rivalry: A New Kitten


    We got our first family cat yesterday – a 7 month old from the Humane Society that we named Sadie (pictured).  Isn’t she adorable?  Isn’t she spunky-looking?  Isn’t she just the thing we needed to jump start the sputtering motor that was sibling rivalry in our house?  Why, yes.  Yes she is.

    Hazel, 4, seems to think the kitty belongs solely to her.  Also “her” domain: all kitty toys, bowls, beds and actions.  Water bowl?  Haze'll fill it!  Stinky wet food?  Haze'll dish it out!  Little feather-tipped kitty toy, jingle bell ball, catnip mouse and scratching post?  All supposedly under Hazel’s control.  Cleaning the litter box?  Oh, that’s my job.  Thanks.  

    Anytime Violet, the 20-month-old, attempts to play with Sadie, or her toys, she is met with furious shrieks from Hazel, or bombarded with “suggestions” for how to play.  “NOOO, Violet, Sadie likes it better when I throw the ball,” or “VIOLET!  You’re shaking the feather wrong!”  To which Violet screams her protest, then simply walks away.   I like that Violet has no interest in fighting, but I’m getting tired of explaining to Hazel, over and over again, that Violet has as much a right as she does to play with the new kitten.  She doesn’t seem to get it.  Or maybe she just doesn’t care.

    Hazel and Sadie have already forged a close friendship, which is great.  But so have Violet and Sadie, and I’m getting tired of having to defend that to Hazel.  I’m thinking/hoping when the novelty of Sadie wears off, so will the arguing?  I’m thinking maybe there’s a better way to explain the concept of a “family” pet to a 4-year-old?  This is our first cat, so I’m trolling for any tips/hints on how to make this transition go a little more smoothly.  Advice?  Anyone?



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