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• You'll Shoot Yer Eye Out, Kid!

  Ugh, if there's one thing that irks me (many things irk me, who am I kidding?), it's the excessive number of safety warnings that our stuff comes with. "Do not eat!" (printed on obviously-inedible things). "Do not put baby in bag!" (for those pouches that hang from strollers)  Which makes this warning article about the dangers of Christmas toys and eye injuries slightly overkill, in my opinion. Read More... Posted Dec 25 2007, 11:03 AM by Karen Murphy with | with 2 comment(s) Filed under: kids, toys, guns, holiday gifts, eye injuries, safety warnings

• Hello Kitty for Your Hello Kitty and Other Undercover Sex Gifts

  I know many of you are struggling with a big dilemma this holiday: You'd like to get your partner a sexy sex toy gift, but you'd also like him or her to be able to open the present with the rest of the family. And you'd like to avoid the fiasco of a few years back, when you gave her that black corset and she opened the present in front of her parents and turned bright red. Look, I've got your back. Here's a couple sex gifts that will slide right under the radar of the family, and no one will know what a naughty holiday it is and stuff. And I should add that when I asked the other Derbys for ideas, I got much more personal information about them than I ever really wanted.  4. The Hello Kitty "shoulder massager". Read More... Posted Dec 04 2007, 05:33 PM by Kelly Mills with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: harry potter, sex toys, Hello Kitty, sex after kids, holiday gifts, brookstone, igallop

• Wow, the Date Rape Drug is On Sale!

  Good news for folks who have been trying to get their hands on Aqua Dots, the hottest toy of the season. Both Toys 'R' Us and Target marked down the toy beads for Black Friday sales, at least according to promo flyers. Woo hoo! Get those stocking stuffers/date rape drugs while they last, because at a low, low price of $19.99 at Toys 'R' Us, and only $13 at Target, these things will be real hard to find on shelves. Why, gamma hydroxy butyrate costs twice that on the street. Your kids will be so ecstatic they might just pass out. No, really. "Now wait just a minute," you say. "Weren't Aqua Dots recalled on November 7 because since industrial chemical they are coated with metabolizes into gamma hydroxy butyrate when ingested... Read More... Posted Nov 25 2007, 07:25 PM by Kelly Mills with | with no comments Filed under: recall, toys r us, aqua dots, dangerous toys, date rape drug, holiday gifts