InsideBayArea.com brings us a couple of letters from two dads-to-be, both asking about their wives' doctors' appointments. Armin Brott (who, according to his website is "America's Most Trusted Dad" - this prompted me to do some research and surveying, and I'm proud to say that I'm "America's 10,298,935th Most Trusted Dad", right behind "Red" from TV's "That 70's Show", but still ahead of Joe Simpson) provided some nice, pat answers to the inquiring future pops. What? You'd like to hear what I'd tell the first guy? Oh, all right...
"Q: My pregnant wife
has been bugging me to go to all her doctor's appointments. I want to
be an involved dad but I can't see any real reason for me to go. Can't
I just find out what I need to know by reading books?"
A: Are you shitting me? Or did you fall through a temporal rift in 1955 that whisked you to a strange and frightening future, one where husbands are actually real partners to their spouses, and take an active interest in both their wife's and their child's health and well-being? Listen, the beauty of Pay-Per-View is that you can buy and watch Wrestlemania at any time, so you've now lost your biggest excuse to skip out on your wife's appointments. Sure, books are great - Will Smith can read a NASA instruction manual and pow! he's an astronaut; you can read The Expectant Father and pow! you're a dad! It's that easy! Do yourself, and your family - believe it or not, this fatherhood thing is actually not all about you - a favor and go to the appointments. While you're at the hospital, you can get your knuckles looked at. I'm sure they've got to be infected, what with them constantly scraping the ground when you walk.