Pseudo-actress turned writer Jenny McCarthy blames the fact that she's "let herself go" on her four year old son, Evan.
"I look in the mirror, and I think, 'Oh my god, you've had that mustache for three weeks!" she says.
Isn't it fun to be able to blame all of the things you don't like about yourself on your kids? Unwanted hair - it's the oldest one's fault. Saggy boobs - they're your middle one's fault. That lame-ass minivan you drive - if your youngest kid hadn't shown up, you wouldn't need it!
I like to blame my lateness on my kids (I blame my mom for the unwanted hair).
I like to blame my 4-year-old daughter for her tangled, ratty hair. The blame is probably more like 60/40 on that one, though - nearly half the time I just don't care enough to wrestle a ponytail into her hair. Since she dresses like a crazy old Chinese lady who's run away from the circus, who's gonna notice her hair?
I like to blame my husband when we run out of coffee - he's the one who makes it, so he should let me know when he's used the last of it, so I can add "by coffee" to my daily to-do list, don't you think?
I like to blame the fact that I'm too lazy to make daily to-do lists on my new job as a blogger for Strollerderby.
And I like to blame our dinky little breadbox of a suburban house for the fact that I rarely host playgroup, when really... well, okay, actually, that's really is why I rarely host playgroup. But it's the house's fault for being so small, not mine, for moving into it, goddammit!
What about you? Do use your kids, partners or cramped living quarters as scapegoats? Tell me about it - come clean! It feels so right.
