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  • Careful Kids, Camo Kills

    Sometimes I read letters to Dear Abby and think, "Who the hell are these people? Do they even live on earth? Are they just the simple, bumpkin byproduct of a good still gone bad?"

    Take this Q and A, for instance -- a 30-year-old law enforcement veteran (I'm guessing parking ticket veteran) urged parents to keep their kids away from the latest in damaging products -- a fad so dangerous, so insidious that parents will put their kids at risk by even thinking about wearing it: camouflage. I kid you not. Someone is concerned that kids will get "lost" if they wear camo.

    OK, I get it. If you're going camping, it's probably not a good idea. For some reason, camoflage seems to work well in the woods -- almost as if it's been designed to. But in the city? In the suburbs? At the mall? Please. Nothing says cute like camo shorts and knee highs.


  • College Student Admits Ignorance; Parents Rejoice

    Remember the college student who said stay-at-home dads have it easy? That at-home dads might as well wax their surfboards and hit the beach, for all the fun they're gonna have in the Land of Domesticity?

    Well, he's back. With his tail between his legs. Nicely. Rebeldad got a nice note from the young man the other day, explaining that he was just poking a little fun -- trying to bring some light-hearted humor to all the students mixed up in the icky business of finals and what not. What he encountered instead was a torch-bearing, angry parental mob led fronted by yours truly.

    Believe me, I know a thing or two about jokes falling on their face. I still get emails about this one (even though I'll defend to the end the idea that "Saturday Night Live" will never be considered "earnest" and also that some people are uptight morons).

    It seems that sometimes you give someone a kid and they give you back their sense of humor. If that's the case, I'm wondering now if this poor, young college columnist might put off parenthood longer than he expected ....


  • Is Breast Milk the Next Diet Fad?

    In their infinite wisdom, the folks over at Fox News has published an article discussing how Japanese researchers have discovered that lactoferrin, a protein found in body fluids may cut visceral fat by as much as 40 percent and could help prevent the risks of heart disease and type-2 diabetes. The richest source of lactoferrin?  Human breast millk (or colostrum.) Could this be a huge breakthrough in dieting news? 

    Well, don't start sucking on those lactating breasts so quickly, my friends. What the brainiacs over at Fox News failed to realize was that the only news source publishing the research was a sleazy Japanese adult magazine Asahi Geino! The article about the breat milk diet was probably situated next to a report about used panty vending machines. 

    Kudos to Fox News for their amazing due diligence!  This reminds me of the time when I was at Berkeley and got into a debate with a buddy about the Persian Gulf War and he started spouting some surprising statistics. When I asked him where he had found that illuminating information, he cheerfully replied, "Hustler magazine, dude!" 



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