If you have watched a teen movie from any of the last few decades (pick one, any one), there's one lesson to be learned. Your kids have to go to prom.
If they don't, apparently, something dasterdly will befall them, and they will regret it for the REST of their lives. Like, totally, forever and ever and ever, along with their BFFs.
Not buying it? Me neither. But parents across the nation are.
Because with the economy tanking, parents are still apparently going hog wild on prom spending. According to a New York Times report, spending may even be up this year.
And that's not just on the gowns. The tuxes too. And the limos. And the tiaras. Some families are forced to put the finery on layaway and pay down their debt, but they've got their hearts set on making it work.
Why?
Before you write me off as some prom-hating feminist (the latter I'll own up to, but not the former), I attended two proms. I went to each with very nice boys (yes, they were boys back then), one of whom is even on my Facebook now and reads some of my Babble posts (hi Tim!). We had fun. You might even say we made some fond memories. But memories that I couldn't have lived without?
Let me put it this way - I was recently doing a thorough cleaning of my attic and chucked a never burned blue candle coated in dust with the words "Remember Me This Way" inscribed on the glass holder. I can't believe I still had it. I wasn't going to hold onto it for a minute longer.
My first time around, my dad put out at least $200 on the gown, the alterations, the shoes. The only thing I still have? A pair of earrings he bought me as a daddy/daughter special thing, which I still wear for special occasions. The dress itself was donated to a Project Cinderella group - a non-profit effort to put prom dresses in the hands of girls who don't have a whole lot of cash. They're sold for a very small sum (so the girls can feel pride in knowing they paid for them, instead of feeling like a charity case), and the money goes back into the project.
My second time around, I knew better. The dress was off the rack and under $30. The shoes were even cheaper. I already had a pair of earrings. The most expensive piece of the evening would have been the price I'd have paid if my parents learned I'd let him drive my car.
Compare the two evenings, and I can't say which one was better. The second, cheaper night, because I was actually dating the guy? The first, more expensive night, because my date for the night is someone I still talk to today? In other words, a prom on the cheap was perfectly acceptable, and a whole lot of fun. I wasn't being cheated by going cheap.
Neither will any of these kids. Send your kids to prom - if they want to go - or don't. If they don't want to, don't pressure them into doing it, and yourself into making the finances work. And for Gawd's sake, if you can't afford it, step away from the couture. Your pocketbook will thank you. And in two years, when they're trying to rustle up tuition, they will too.
Image: New York Times
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