I never really understood people who wanted to go shopping right after the winter holidays, except maybe for the very thrifty stocking up on cheap wrapping paper for next year. But suddenly I find myself contemplating it.
I blame it on my fellow 'Derby blogger who wrote about recent research arguing that traditional "girl toys" discourage the development of problem solving skills useful in science and math: "The toys reported [by parents] as girls' favorites didn't teach anything specific,
allowing, rather for imaginative play mostly related to childcare.
Boys' reported favorite toys, on the other hand, encouraged action,
learning of new things, use of reading and problem solving skills as
well as imagination."
See, I keep thinking of that post now, because it's striking, after all the grandparents have weighed in with their prezzies, how heavy my two-and-a-half-year-old daughter's haul is on the tea sets and dolls. Now, I'm not complaining. It's not like anyone was on a mission to make her a little princess. The personalized map of her neighborhood made for her by her GIS-enabled uncle is awesome and all about the abstract thinking. The just-like-daddy's painters' jeans and the red leather jacket are anything but prissy. And she adores each instance of the dolls (some of which came from us) and tea sets and jewelry. I don't have a problem with anything she got (even the pretty sexist Richard Scarry classic What Do People Do All Day? because it's awesome in so many other ways and such a nostalgia trip for me). In fact, it's all pretty great.
But I'm nonetheless finding myself aware of the gaps, aware that intentionally or not, the balance of her new possessions is clearly on the "caring and nurturing" side over the "making things, using their hands and solving problems" side. This is leading me to fantasize about spending money I don't have on a tool set or TinkerToys or Montessori counting rods (or the Free to Be reissue).
I am, of course, probably overreacting and should just take a deep breath, let life return to normal, and keep my eyes on the garage sales. It's not like imaginative nuturing play will limit her ability to develop other skills. It's more that I'm concerned about her getting to the age of developing a gender identity, which isn't far off, and deciding that based on the evidence so far, these are girl toys and she should eschew the others. Any other parents of daughters feeling the same way? (Or, for that matter, parents of sons having the reciprocal problem?)
Photo by Doeth, via Flickr.
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