Strollerderby

Is This Why We Escalate the Holidays?

Posted by Miriam Axel-Lute

Is some of the holiday excess we see a symptom of parents trying to recapture the thrill of introducing a special time to their youngest kids?

I ponder that in my biweekly column for the local paper this week:

"If you enjoy the winter holidays, as my family decidedly does, introducing them to a toddler is a blast. Our daughter wakes up each morning (and after each nap) asking "Is it a new day?" because she wants to snap another felt ornament on our advent calendar ("alendar calendar" to her). She hugs the Christmas tree. She wants to take walks to see her favorite moving lit-up reindeer contraptions in neighbors' yards. . . .

Right now it's so easy. She's full of wonder anyway; everything is new and exciting. . . .  In fact, if we act excited about something, we have an 80 percent chance of her being excited too. I remember clearly how last year, when she was one and a half, getting to eat a cookie first thing in the morning and getting a gift of a container of raisins that was under her control, to be eaten at whatever pace she wanted, was enough to make a red-letter day.

This year, the simple little idea of shining our shoes on Christmas Eve is so exciting she can barely wait and keeps lobbying to do it earlier.

I think it was the shoes thing that made me realize: I am in grave danger of trying to recapture this thrill, this sense of being able to effortlessly offer my children wonder, every December. I know that no matter how much she might continue to like the holidays, it won't be like this again. But who wouldn't want it to be?

Suddenly I had a flash of compassion for the parents escalating their purchases each year or fighting to hold on to their kids' belief in Santa one more season. Even if you're not facing peer-instigated disappointment from older kids who didn't get the latest whatsit, who wouldn't feel the urge to keep reaching after the irreplaceable delight of a kid facing her first snow, first menorah, first stocking?"

Here's the rest. Does it ring true, or am I off base?

Photo by OctopusHat.

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Comments

 

brooke said:

every year my husband and i have the great christmas argument about santa claus and my oldest's imminent descent into disbelief about the entire thing. he doesn't understand my reluctance to let go of the story, the believing, the wanting her to believe-- you just explained me perfectly: i don't want to let go of this time in her life.

although every time in her life, every moment has proved itself beautiful in its own way.

December 24, 2008 2:35 PM

About Miriam Axel-Lute

Miriam Axel-Lute is a freelance writer, editor, poet, and urban planning junkie. She lives, works, and gardens in Albany, NY, with her two partners and daughter.

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