Omigod, Forbes has this ah-mazing article on how celebrities lose the weight right away after they have their cute little babies. Oh, sure, the article acknowleges right away that famous mamas have all this pressure to drop pounds immediately, and that can be frustrating for regular old moms to watch. And yeah, we'll all admit celebs have personal trainers and chefs and full-time nannies and so on to help with the baby weight loss endeavor. But that doesn't mean we common folk can't learn from celebrities, right? 

And the first big thing we learn is that celebrity weight issues must make money for mags, because this article has about as much substance as JLo's postpartum dinners. You know what we are supposed to take from the lifestyles of the rich and famous moms? 1. Be motivated, just like those poor famous people who have tons of cameras documenting every postpartum jiggle; 2. Breastfeeding will help you lose weight--except some celebs say it won't; and 3. Get fit before you conceive, and maybe exercise carefully during pregnancy. Gosh, that is sooo insightful and helpful, I'm sure we've never heard anything like that before. Next you'll be telling us we should "burn calories" and "eat healthy"! Thank gawd we have the chance to worship at the altar of fame, because we gain so much! 

Can I share something with you? The focus on post-partum weight loss among the A-, B-, and C-listers is idiotic. These people start with a genetic advantage, have every resource available to make weight loss a primary life goal, and are sometimes shedding the pounds in unhealthy ways and at a dangerous rate. Screw. This. Shit. If you care about dropping the baby fat, at a minimum tell yourself "Nine months on, nine months off." And better yet, just enjoy your newborn, because you have time to lose the weight, and your infant is only going to be this little and precious for the blink of an eye.