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Pregcellent: Who's Having All Those Babies Out of Wedlock?

Posted by Kelly Mills

teen pregnancyI'm going to try and write this without once referring to the movie Juno. (Crap, does that count?) Remember back in the day, when you could easily wax hysterical over the issue of teen pregnancy? When we were freaked about babies having babies? Well, in the U.S. teen pregnancy rates are falling, so it's going to be that much harder to whip ourselves into a lather, and that is good. In 2004, only 12 percent of pregnancies were to teen moms, compared to 15 percent in 1990. Oh, and one likely factor in the drop is the more frequent use of birth control methods. Imagine that. 

However, there is another group who are having babies outside of marriage, and I guarantee you we'll see more fear-mongering stories about at least some of them. Turns out birth rates are going up for unmarried women in their twenties, and also for older women. Maybe twenties is the new teens? Now while teen pregnancy is obviously not ideal, I'm curious to see how these women under thirty fare with babies. Anyhow, let's just be glad more of the kids are using condoms.


Comments

 

mamaloo said:

Again, can we distinguish between out of wedlock which means almost nothing in today's culture where co-habiting is totally normal, and single parents. Are these financially well off women in decent careers deciding to forego partnering? Because, in my late 20's I decided I was done with relationships and would intentionally get pregnant and raise a child without a partner. (That all got shot to hell when I got comfortable and happy being single and promptly met the man who would be my husband but not until we had first had a child  OUT OF WEDLOCK!)

There are so many kinds of families around. Babble needs to be way more specific about whom they are talking.

April 16, 2008 7:19 PM
 

Cassie said:

I can safely say the majority of black women I know under 50 are unmarried and have kids.  Some have several kids from different men.  These are all professional women with mortgages and nice cars.  Men are almost obselete.

April 16, 2008 7:24 PM
 

km said:

I'm due to have my third out-of-wedlock son any day now, all with the same dad, whom I have no immediate plans to marry.  I was 24 when my first was born, I'll be 29 when this new little guy appears.

I'm not anti-marriage.  For me, it seems an obsolete institution.  I can totally appreciate that for some, marriage is the way to go.

That being said, I do tend to refer to the boys' dad as my husband.  "Boyfriend" seems too casual, "fiance" implies we are planning to marry, "baby-daddy" sounds like he's not involved in raising the kids, and "partner" makes it sound like I'm a lesbian.  There really just is not a good term yet for people in our type of relationship.

April 16, 2008 8:48 PM
 

K said:

Pull it back, Cassie.  Rein it in and pull it back.  I'll leave it at that.

April 18, 2008 10:22 AM
 

cooper1178 said:

This is strictly from my own and a couple of friends' experience, but maybe the difference is alcohol and freedom?  In highschool I was sexually active, but I was also sober and under my parents' roof, so I was crazy careful and aware of what I was doing.  In college and into the first year or two after college, not so much.  On my own and drinking waaayyy too much, I made very bad decisions with little thought of the consequences.  Guess what?  I ended up with a baby at 23.  It all worked out for the best though, I already had an education and a job, having my daughter just forced me to grow up and be an adult and I'm a better person for it.  Now I'm 29, happily married (not to her dad) and expecting #2 in early July.

April 18, 2008 11:31 AM

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