When I was a kid, my mother told me and my sister that if we didn't clean our room before we left for vacay with our grandparents in Florida, she would throw away our toys. We didn't, and she did - at least, according to my sister, who remembers this even though she's two years younger than I am. I must have repressed the memory.
But that's small potatoes compared to Jane Hambleton, of Des Moines, Iowa, who is selling her poor 19-year-old son's car for the minor infraction of underage drinking. I mean, isn't DUI almost a rite of passage for teens these days? And what are the odds of actually hitting another car in as sparsely populated state as Iowa? At worst, he might hit a pig, seeing as there's seven pigs for every person in Iowa (according to a high school friend who went to Grinnell), and that's a month's supply of free bacon.
Seriously, I love this ad Hambleton took out in The Des Moines Register: "OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet."
Rock on, Jane. When your son is a dad himself, he'll realize he grew up with the coolest parents on the planet.
