David J. Pfahler is taking Scott Swimm to court because Pfahler says Swimm was skiing recklessly when the two collided and Pfahler says he tore a shoulder tendon. Now, Pfahler is 60 years old, and at the time of the accident, Swimm was 7. Swimm's dad says it wasn't even a bad crash, but that hasn't stopped Pfahler (say that 5 times fast) from suing to the tune of $75,000 for "physical therapy, vacation time, nursing and medical services provided by Pfahler's wife, and other expenses." Nursing services from his wife? Dude, why not also add the fact that she cooked and cleaned and performed carnal acts when he couldn't use that arm so good as professional chef-ing, housekeeping, and, um, escort services? Don't hold back on that kid, for god's sake.
But why am I not surprised Pfahler would sue? Because he works for Reader's Digest. That's why he has no qualms about going legal hard on a 48-pound kid skiing less than ten miles per hour (according to mom). But I do understand why Pfahler (I can't say that enough) would be upset. I mean, it's not like people routinely get injured skiing or anything, so this must have felt like such a freak occurence, an unheard of event. So I'll just say to him: Happy Holidays, dickhead.
