In this space, we’ve dealt with the Swedish baby named Metallica, as well as arguments in favor of forming an Office of Nameland Security to bring some order to the unchecked freedom parents have in choosing names and how to spell them.

I think we’ve all just agreed to disagree and keep writing whatever we please on birth certificates: Apple, Pilot Inspektor, Suri, Pax. Anything less isn't even an option.

Now comes this story on names that makes Metallica seem like the next most reasonable thing to calling your son Jack.

How many Godknows, Lovemores, and Honours go to your kid’s preschool?

These names, bestowed on kids in Zimbabwe, are the result of the tradition of choosing a name based on meaning, not current trends (or an obligation to trend-setting). In the past, names given were in the region's various local languages. But with English taking over, the name selections have shifted too.

So it is not terribly shocking to meet an Enough or Oblivious, a Hatred or Jupiter, a Givethanks or Norest. There are stories behind the names, some quite easy to imagine, others not so much (Hatred? That's a little harsh.).

My kids’ names mean “Bringer of Joy” and “A Free Woman” according to this site. And while I was pleased to find this out, actual meaning wasn’t the starting point for my husband and I when deciding on names. Just a bonus. My own first name (which happens to also be the name of a mind-bogglingly large number of today's third-graders) means "Tower of Strength." Doesn't really roll off the tongue.

But the parents of Zimbabwe have certainly raised the bar for the Hollywood name-giving risk-takers. Naming a child Abide, Praise, or Raised-on kind of makes Apple, Kal-el, Neveah and Moxie Crimefighter seem downright bland.