Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Mandi — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 01:27:10 GMT

Dammit you're right!!!

I also find myself judging on occassion but not too often because everyone has their mother challenges and mishaps and needs. You can't judge someones parenting by a moment of observation.

Thanks for telling it like it is.

music

kalimurzino@rambler.ru — Tue, 29 May 2007 09:51:57 GMT

David

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

anonymous — Mon, 23 Apr 2007 05:30:01 GMT

i know this is a late comment but:

"it's impossible to see the mirrors in the broken glass after the stones have all been thrown."

beautifully written and quite profound.

Friday Playgroup (March 30) « Mamanista

Friday Playgroup (March 30) « Mamanista — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 05:41:31 GMT

PingBack from http://mamanista.wordpress.com/2007/03/30/friday-playgroup-march-30/

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Alusz — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 00:41:56 GMT

Children should see their mothers work on something other than the household work. It gives them insight into the fact that their mother is a person ...not some sort of grand innkeeper.

Even if "work" is a hobby, a passion, something other than money making, it disturbs me when the child is supposed to the center. What happens when the child goes, will the lack of centrifical force send us reeling into outer space?

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Latia — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 05:09:42 GMT

Yeah! Amen!

I totally identify with you, that woman, and every other mom out there who is doing something for herself (or her sanity) and is being judged.

You should have said hello. I'm sure she would have appreciated it.

Her son is happy in the stroller, she is happy doing her work...why can't those other mothers be happy for the peace and solace that she has found?

We're all mothers, we're all in the same boat.

We are all trying to balance what is best for our children while trying to maintain some sense of our sanity and our identity.

Judging someone like that only reveals that those women lack something that that woman has...she has found something to make her happy and her son is perfectly safe while she's doing so.

Can't we all just get along?

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

addknitter — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 01:35:29 GMT

I feel like there is a nation of young mothers going insane from isolation out there, and that being in public can make you feel less crazy and more connected, even if you're not talking to anyone. When my kids were babies, I craved the public sphere--this could be what this woman is feeling. I always love your keen observations, you are such a great writer!

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

kittenpie — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 19:58:40 GMT

Those couple of hours may be her sanity. She may have a long other 20 hours of looking after child and house and everything, and if those couple of hours of down time for her and her child are what makes it work, good for her for finding it. I'm sure people would judge me for things, too, but I don't believe that many moms don't weigh what they do with their children and do what they need to do to make it okay for them and their kids.

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

shel — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 18:55:44 GMT

i love your writing. there hasn't been a time yet that i haven't been made to think or to stand up and applaud you.

thank you for keeping my brain functioning. :)

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Rocky ~ HeadMutha — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 16:19:50 GMT

Beautifully written!

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

MammaLoves — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 15:09:28 GMT

Amen sister!

In Case You Missed It -- March 17-24,2007 « Savvy Moms

In Case You Missed It -- March 17-24,2007 « Savvy Moms — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 05:43:34 GMT

PingBack from http://savvymoms.wordpress.com/2007/03/23/in-case-you-missed-it-march-17-242007/

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Traci — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 00:18:36 GMT

Yes, Dawn...your comment rubbed me the wrong way too. I'm hoping that it was a case of not thinking before you typed, because if you really mean that, you totally missed the point.

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

ZeitgeistMama — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 22:45:12 GMT

So Dawn, you're saying that mom's who work outside the home without their kids ARE deserving of your judgement?

That's pretty much the opposite of what Rebecca is trying to say here - have a little compassion!

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

petite mommy — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 15:23:15 GMT

I can completely identify with what you wrote. If only I could write so eloquently.

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Dawn — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 15:10:31 GMT

At least she is with her child. She could be working away from home 10 hours a day just getting home in time to put him to bed.

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Jackie — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 12:44:32 GMT

I love your writing style, and I couldn't agree with you more. I have 6 kids, and I know that the judging goes on constantly. Maybe I'm being sensitive, but I think people look at me more when my kids act up, wondering why did I have all these kids and can't control any of them?

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

GirlsGoneChild — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 06:07:39 GMT

I love that, Peter.

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Peter — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 06:04:58 GMT

Judging is so easy, and I do it all the time... Lately, I've tried the exercise of judging my own parenting out of context, as if seen by a stranger for just those few seconds:

-- Why's that guy playing with his BlackBerry when he's at the park with his kids?

-- That dude's son has been screaming for him for five minutes and he's just sitting there.

-- Why doesn't that jerk bother to put his kids in a sweater?

All of these a casual park observer could have thought of me just over the past couple of days. I try to remind myself of that when I'm judging them.

re: Mothers Who Make Bead Necklaces and Sip Coffee at Sidewalk Cafes

Wendy — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 02:25:42 GMT

I understand so much better after having my second. I use to judge moms all the time for what they seem to be doing with their kids. And then I had a child that is more challenging than my daughter ever was.

Who is to say that her son doesnt like to sit in the stroller rocking back and forth? Who is to say that he doesnt like sitting there peeling straws?

My son likes to sit and watch people and goings-on. He would much rather sit in the stroller or Daddy's lap than mine. He hates hats, which I have been scolded for by older men this past winter. My son needs to move around, even if it is on a dirty floor.

No one ever knows, except that mom. And what is so wrong with stealing a couple of hours outside doing something besides giving all attention to your kid. He wont die, maybe he will learn to entertain himself. Oh God, please.