Twas the night before Halloween and all through the house
Not a person wasn't helping me throw last-minute costumes together, not even my spouse.
Fabrics were pressed with iron-on-letters with care.
In hopes it would look good and no one would stare (in a bad way)
My child was screaming from the bars of his bed
Wanting to hang out with his parents instead
Although momma was flattered, "Son, now, don't get me wrong...
"...But this costume is going to take me all the night long!"
When out the front door, there arose such a flutter.
A teenager in a mask! (I internally muttered)
Away from the peephole I arose with a knife!
(I was cutting a jack-o-lantern with my Dad and his wife. )
The full moon that I saw through the peephole was scary!
"Smell my feet," said the teen and "my ass is real hairy!"
Then what to my wandering eyes should appear?
But a dozen more teens with trick-or-treat gear!
And all of them clad head to toe, all in black
Carrying with them, stained pillow case sacks!
"It's too early I said! You must come back tomorrow"
But the teens, they all frowned, their brows furrowed in sorrow...
So I opened the door. With my pumpkin carving knife.
With my half-awake toddler, my dad and his wife
And we looked at each other and we had to agree
It isn't a sin to want some candy!
"Just one!" I demanded, shaking my head.
"And if you smash all our pumpkins you're totally dead...
...I'll kill you, myself!" I seriously said.
The kids all said thank you, adjusting their masks.
And as the door closed, my father's wife asked:
"Why did you give them our candy, anyway?
They're too old and it's not even Halloween day!"
I thought for a moment and then looked at my son.
And then back at the costume I had just now begun.
And I opened my eyes and stretched my hands to the sky
And I said something, shocking, even to I...
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