Lean on Knee: Milestone Edition
On Tuesday Fable will be seventeen-months old and, most likely, not yet walking on foot. She knows how to walk. She walks a few steps on her own, every day, but for the most part? She walks on her knees.
Like this:
And unless Fable gets up and walks sometime next week? Archer will be the earlier of our two children, first walking at seventeen-months.
Which, until now, I thought was SOOOOOOO LATE OMG. And now I’m realizing that actually? It’s not that late. In fact, it clocks in at “average” in our family.
I figured Fable would be an early bloomer because Archer was so late. That’s how it was with my brother and me. I peaked early, talking (claims my mother) fluently by my first birthday. Meanwhile, my brother struggled with his speech for years only to outrun me in every way by his third birthday. Case in point: dude recently wrote this.
Like I said, I peaked early.
Archer was much like my brother. It took him until his third birthday to find his words and come into his own. But now? The child is mind-blowingly genius-ish. I know I’m his mother and it’s my job to think so but oh my, is his mind ever a treasure-map to the universe’s greatest secrets. Every day with him feels like a gift from the gods of inspiration.
So, I’m not worried about Fable. Like I’ve written before, I’m relieved to be a different parent this time around, trusting in her ability to come to her own conclusions about readiness.
But! I am very much in the know when it comes to the pressure of parenthood, specifically milestone markers. Milestone markers that mean EVERYTHING even though we kinda sorta have no idea what they’re measured against.
After googling for answers to all questions Mirena IUD, I realized the best way to find genuine, truthful information c/o people I respect, was to open a dialogue, here, where we could all share/discuss/inform/lean on one another and YOU GUYS? Hooked it UP, MAN. You helped me and each other and strangers on google-quest for answers.
So I thought now would be a great opportunity to do the same. Because too many times I hear from people worried about their kids because they’re not hitting the “right marks” at the “right times,” and as a parent who used to ALSO worry about these things, I thought a share-forum might be in order.
Yes?
Because, much like with my IUD post, I’m starting to realize the
doctors don’t tell us the WHOLE story and I think it might be helpful
for those of you stressing about your “late bloomer” to realize that
maybe your “late bloomer” is right on schedule.
The spread is vast when it comes to averages and “what is normal” in terms of milestones. I know you guys can help me showcase that.
Here, I’ll go first:
Archer:
Crawled @ 13 months
Walked @ 17 months
Talked in sentences @ 3+
Fable:
Crawled @ 10 months
Walked @ TBD
Talked in sentences @ TBD* (has a handful of words at seventeen-months. Ten maybe?)
I know I’m not alone when I say, I’d LOVE to hear from you…
***
This made me laugh so hard. Why you ask? My son did the same thing. He was slow to crawl… started out with an army crawl at around 11 months. Moved to a regular crawl at around 14 months, bear crawl at 15 months but then gave the bear crawl up because he couldn’t really see where he was going and went back to regular crawling.
Then he realised that he’d love to be able to crawl AND carry his toys at the same time, so along came the knee shuffle at around 16 months. He used one knee and one foot, so it was a sort of half crawl upright thing. Pretty much anyone who saw him doing it laughed at him. He must have been embarrassed because he finally walked at 18 months!
P.S. he’s nearly 2 and a half now and has only recently started to use 2 word sentences. He still mostly points and grunts, his pediatrician said that was fairly common for boys (of all ages, ha!).
Avery:
Crawled @ 6 months
Walked @ 11 months
Talked in sentences by his first birthday.
The funny thing? I would have loved for him to be on a bit of a more normal schedule. I mean, yeah, it’s fun to brag about my brilliant baby who could recite the alphabet and the Pledge of Allegiance at 18 months old (yes, really) and who now at 3 knows more song lyrics than I do and uses words like “ridiculous” and “pediatrician.” And as I’ve said before, when he becomes an astronaut at 16 I’m gonna take full credit for his genius-ness.
But…I never got to have a baby! Seriously, the kid grew up like overnight. We had a few precious months of the babbling and the nonsense talk and then he was running all over the place and talking like an adult. I would have liked to have my baby and toddler for a bit longer.
As moms we obsess about these things so often, but it really doesn’t matter much in the end. People compliment me all the time on Avery’s “intelligence,” and while I think he’s smart, I know that his quick development as a baby and toddler doesn’t really say anything about how he’ll turn out as an adult. Maybe he’s quick now, but he’ll develop other issues later on. And while he’s definitely ahead in the verbal department, he’s still not potty trained, makes a mess when he feeds himself, and is pretty timid and has lots of fears. Everybody struggles with something – it’s just different for all of us (moms and kids).
There are many years to cover real estate on our precious feet
My second daughter and my grandson were both RUNNING at EIGHT months!!!
thanks to you I’m not worried at all about my 13 month not walking, my friends who have babies LOVE to brag about their child and how and what they do! i just listen and when they ask me if she is walking yet? i just smile and say ” we are actually very comfortable n the crawling stage thanks” i get stares and they think i’m lazy because they think I dont stimulate her enough, whatever, that’s them.. my kid is very happy to crawl and im happy too.
thank you Rebecca for giving some peace of mind, because yes doctors dont know everything! I should know.. I am one haha
My older kid never crawled, but walked at 11 months. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. We went from being worried about the not-crawling to chasing him around in a nanosecond.
I’m hoping the new baby stays stationary for a LONG time. They’re easier that way.
I’m so glad you’re bringing this up because my son (my first and only so far) is 23 months and doesn’t talk yet. I’m struggling with 1/2 of me thinking it’s perfectly fine and the other 1/2 worried sick. I know he’ll talk when he’s ready and I feel like just thinking about it puts pressure on him. I’m trying to just be relaxed but I’m not there yet. It’s so good to hear your story and so many others about how their sons didn’t talk until 3, then came out with full paragraphs. Thanks for sharing!
I have a non crawler too, and I am hoping that he stays that way for a while. The longer I can go leaving him on the floor the easier!
Doesn’t it hurt her little knees? Ow!
I love the pictures of Fable on her knees. I do think that each kid is different and they each do things in their own time.
I’ll give you mine.
Morgan (she’s eight): Crawled at 5 months, Walked at 9 months, Talked in sentences at 13 months. (no joke.)
Bailey (she’s five): Crawled at 11 months, Walked at 16.5 months, Talked in sentences at two and a half. (but she didn’t talk much at all until right after she turned two.)
Harrison: 17 months. Crawled at 6 mo., Walked at 10 mo., words? About 15 maybe?
Our daughter has a chromosomal disorder that has interfered with her development. Months would go by without ANY progress, and only intensive therapies have helped her catch up. When I see other parents worry, I can see that their babies are sometimes only taking their sweet time… My daughter is now 3 and we are helping her crawl, creep, and get into trouble.
One thing I have learned along the way, though, is that hearing problems can sometimes interfere with the overall development of a child. For example, if a kid has frequent ear infections, it is likely that fluid will be stuck in the ear and that can cause delay in speech. If you suspect that is the case with your child, just ask your pediatrician for a tympanogram, it is easy and non-invasive and the results can rule out hearing issues. That is one thing doctors do not put enough emphasis on, fluid in ears can affect speech, balance, behavior etc. If your kid has a lot of ear infections, it is really worth checking with an ENT!
My daughter is now almost 2.
She crawled at 11 months.
She took her first step at 17 months.
Began walking well and running at 18 months.
Began talking in primitive sentences at about 22 months… (stuff like “I got milk”)
My doctor told me that the walking thing is a matter of temperment with kids. My doctor believes that my daughter waited to take her first steps until she could do it well because she didnt want to spend a lot of time falling over. Other children are more inclined to walk early, and dont care that it will take them 3 months to master it. 3 weeks after taking her first steps, my daughter was running.
had my girl at 19 and thought i was the best parent ever. she whistled at 9 months okay!? seriously, she did. talked at 7 months, 3 word sentences at about a year (also when she started walking ) and potty trained at a 1 1/2, reading by 4 – before kindergarten. no joke.
then i had my boy. he had a few words by 1, walked by 1, potty trained at 3 which to me was like yikes! he didn’t seem to pick things up as quick as my girl. reading at the average age of 5, tying his shoes even later.
now? they are 13 (boy) and 15 (girl) and he has a 90 average in school, hers is 81, he is writing a book and has a vocabulary that gets him accused of plagiarism until his teachers get to know him and then marvel at his genius!
I am DYING for you guys to respond because I have a 3 month old and I like to think I am not a mother who would care about being “on time” with milestones but I have to say I am excited for my little one to get mobile. It’s exciting to see her do new things. At the same time sometimes I say to myself…be advanced! Do it early! and then hate myself after.
oh and i forgot my 3rd kid- ha! she is 6 and did everything at about the same time as my son which shows me that i am not in control of anything and my first child was probably the exception not the rule.
Thank you SO much for inviting us to share on this.
My soon to be 18-month old son is a dynamo when it comes to physical milestones (for a good example, you can check out the latest entry on my blog Ninjamom.ca entitled “Alert. LBSW Rises to Level 4!”
BUT he has yet to utter a word other than “dada” or “mama”. He understands quite a bit and takes direction very well (e.g. tell him to “Go to your room and get your monkey book”, and he’ll go to his room and come out with a book – but probably not the monkey one). He points to head, eyes, ears, nose, feet, etc when you ask him to do so. When you say “Dance!”, he dances. But the boy won’t talk! Very frustrating. He babbles, but no words.
I’ve started to worry about this, thinking that all 18 month olds talk (at least a few words) by this age. In fact, just this morning I was in a tizzy thinking that because he is such a bad eater, that I must not be feeding him enough to make his brain develop properly (in the language centres of the brain, at least).
So I was so glad to read your entry, and to see that your son was talking in sentences by age 3. I will definitely relax now. I know that he is thriving in every other way, but it’s amazing how we hang on to those few things where they are “behind” and make mountains out of mole hills.
Our family doctor is a naturopath. He doesn’t put time limits on much, which is good in my book. So I do not feel the doctor pressure for my son to hit certain milestones at certain times. That said, I do feel the pressure from other parents and grandparents. I hear about milestones from them about their children “Well, my son blah blah blah at blah blah blah time…” Which is always so far ahead of any other child I feel they must be lying.
Or from the grandparents “When you were that age you were already blah blah blah. Why is he not doing that?”
But ultimately….I don’t care. At this stage in life my son only knows how to be himself. And that is all I want.
Dustin
Crawled: 6 months
Walked: 2 wks before 1 year
Started talking @ 9 months, but at 16 months still no sentences.
I do not worry if he is on schedule because I believe he will do things at his own pace whether I stress about it or not. Just want him to be a child for now because they just seem to grow up so fast
The Who:
Crawled @ 8 months (but only an army crawl. Didn’t really crawl-crawl until he was already walking.
Walked @ 11 months
Talked in full sentences @ TBD (but at 15 months, he has about 110 words and strings two together sometimes.)
dude… fuck the milestones and the “should” shit…
fable has your beautiful, inquisitive and glorious profile.
what could be better than that?
I don’t know much because I only have 1 daughter who is not even 6 months old yet, I have no comparison. She seems to want to walk, more then she wants to crawl, she is not into being on the floor but would rather pull herself up.
I’m always hearing from my mother how early i was at everything, running around the house at 9months, reading by 2. but i don’t think these things have anything to do with genius at all. there aren’t that many geniuses for one thing, that gets thrown around way too much. yes, i know everyone thinks their children are geniuses, but come on now. haha. so i literally pay no attention to when my daughter is supposed to do anything, i know she will learn and do as she wants, when she wants.
she did roll over at 2 months, my baby genius. lol.
The boy:
crawled @7 months
walked @14.5 months
sentences @18 months
The girl:
crawled @6 months
steps @ 10 months
actually walking @16 months
sentences@ tbd
I was so worried about my son being a ‘late’ walker and spent countless hours worrying about him and comparing him to all our friends who had 9 month walkers. Now, he is the most physically adventurous kid I know, runs, bikes, climbs and jumps with incredible grace and agility for a 3 year old. So I’ve learned that it truly doesn’t matter when they start doing these things, they’ll all eventually do it and there is no reason to rush it.
My son crawled around 10 months, walked at 13months. He’s 22 months now and says only a handful of words, where his friends at the same age are speaking in sentences and singing songs.
Plotting your kids on charts is annoying.
My son is almost 16 months old now. He crawled between 7-8 months…he did a strange “miltary crawl” for a while and then that morphed into a modified “one-leg” crawl and finally ended in a regular “two knees” crawl. He started walking for real right before he was 11 months old. Now, at just shy of 16 months he talks a little bit. He says a few words here and there. He is “skinny” for his age, I guess…20% in weight but 90% in height. I mean, people sometimes make me worry that I don’t feed him enough or something. Especially, my sister who has a 37lb 21 month old! So, when the two are compared my nephew is “strapping and healthy” and my son is “small, puny.” Whatever. Kids are all different. They grow at different rates and do things at different times. My nephew says maybe 2-3 words, where my son can say 15-20. I agree that there is a VAST difference in terms of what is “normal” in the milestone department. I try not to worry so much (as this is my first kid) about what people say or what other kids do that my son doesn’t (we were at the park recently and this little girl not much older than my son was talking in full sentences and I felt like a failure). Can I just say (not like you don’t know this already) you have the most gorgeous, precious little girl ever. She is so beautiful!
My 3 1/2 year old did everything late… hello PULLUPS!
I am so happy to hear that there is another knee-walker out there! Our first two boys both sat at 6 months, crawled at 9 months and were walking proficiently at 12 – 13 months. Our third boy beat them both by crawling at 8 months but has now been doing his (I thought unique) knee-walking for months now. He’s 15.5 months and still on his knees. He’ll occasionally stand and take a few steps but then he drops right back down to his knees. I want him walking to get his hands off the floor! But he’s taking his time. I know he’ll walk in time, he seems to be pretty cautious which is a fantastic trait in a toddler, I know that 12-18 months is typical, but there don’t seem to be many kids who aren’t walking by 14 months.
They’ll get there.
I’m not a parent but: I have a cousin who is a late bloomer and started walking at seventeen or eighteen months I believe. And though he’s going to be three on April 10th he is still not fluent in his speaking yet.
Sometimes kids just take their own time working up to their milestones. And as you’ve written, “So, I’m not worried about Fable. Like I’ve written before, I’m relieved to be a different parent this time around, trusting in her ability to come to her own conclusions about readiness.” When Fable’s ready to fully walk, she’ll do it. She’s probably just holding on something fierce to her “babyhood,” not wanting to let it go just yet. ;o)
my kids were all pretty fast to hit the physical milestones –
Izzy: sitting 6 mo crawling 8mo, walking 10 mo
Jack: crawling 6 mo sitting 8 mo (yes he could crawl before he could sit up, wtf) walking 13 mo
Sophie: sitting 7 mo crawling 9 mo, walking 12 mo
but the differences in the talking have been huge. Izzy said her first word at 10 mo and was using clear sentences at 16 mo. Jack on the other hand has only recently started saying 2-3 words together, sometimes 4. As of age 2 (six months ago) he only knew about 5-10 words at all, and while it was annoying not to be able to communicate at all, I knew he would get to it when he was ready.
My response to anyone worried about their late bloomer is this: Have you ever heard of anyone (without physical limiation) not learning to walk? or talk? have you ever seen a fully functional adult walking on their knees to the subway? Or grunting and pointing at Starbucks? No. Everyone gets there. we may not all hit the same milestones within the same time frame, but when you are looking at a life of 80 years ahead of you, what difference do a few months make?
I’m going to start my comment off by saying, DUDE (Cause I’m the smart one you want to take advice from.) but, really, you know you don’t need to hear it from us. We are in the land of competitive parenting and how sad is that? What happened to a the phrase “it takes a village…” because these days it takes the competition from other parents and the evil eye from strangers at the mall to get you to enroll your kid in every pre-reading, writing, walking, dancing, class in history but really, they get there when they get there. Just because kids younger than my son can speak in sentences, use the potty, etc. and mine is just getting out “Mama” and “Dada”, I’m not the least bit worried. My son walked a few days after his first birthday, his closest friend walked three months before he turned one, my other good friends son walked right after he turned two. Kids are all over the board. My half brother didn’t utter a word until he was THREE and while everyone was freaking out, it was actually the doctor that remained calm. At 16 the kids a freakin’ genius and his sister that was singing Evita songs at one, well,is not.
My advice: sit back and enjoy all the stages, even the long lasting ones, with a few glasses of wine!
We just went through this with my son. We even had to do early intervention because he never really crawled in the traditional sense, just kind of scooted on his bum. He is now almost 19 months and running all over the house (he started really walking @ 17.5 months) and speaking in full sentences. He has a vocabulary of around 100 words already. I know better than to brag about that or think it is special b/c his older sister was the same. I think it is really just a genetic thing how kids develop and has little to no bearing on what happens later. I get really irritated with parents who freak out over milestones and think their kid is special b/c he/she walked at 8 months or talked at 6. Kids (mostly) even out in the end. I say if Fable is making any attempt to move (which she is) then you have nothing to worry about. She will be walking before you know it and two walkers? Oy vey. Enjoy the time before that happens.
My son (who is now 6):
crawled: 9 months
walked: 13 months
talked in sentences: 2.5 years old
My daughter (now 22 months):
crawled: 6 months
walked: 14 months
talked in sentences: 18 months
I really thought my daughter would walk sooner since she crawled so early. But she just got really good at crawling and as soon as she started walking, I missed seeing her crawling little booty around the house.
Me:
Crawled – Never
Walked – 6 months
Talked – Sentences by 1 year
Babies will do their stuff when they’re ready. Some insist on doing things Right Then while others prefer to sit back and observe. I babysit for a 3 year old that was actually labeled as autistic in a 30 min session! Her evaluator made this diagnosis on the sole basis that she wasn’t speaking in two sentence conversations. Not only is it insane that someone could make a diagnosis in 30 minutes, but really? Autistic because she’s more interested in talking about dora than answering “how are you today” in two sentences?
I am looking forward to these answers! Still waiting for my 15 month old to say his first word. I think that is ok, but is hard given that his older brother had 50 words at this point…
I believe there is no wrong or right time for a child to be doing “things”. I also hate how ppl/doctors are so quick to label you defective if you arent doing things by the expected time. I wouldnt stress. She will do it in her own time. I hope that helps a little.
I am currently in an infancy and early childhood class (one of my majors is human development). The professor stresses, quite often, that the milestone ages thrown around are only AVERAGES, and that a wide range of ages is quite normal.
I have known two people who didn’t talk until they were almost 4. They are both very intelligent, talkative people attending college. And the walking late thing? Every child moves their own way. My professors told us an anecdote about one of her grandchildren skipping walking, he essentially went from crawling to running, “later” than maybe his parents felt comfortable with. It’s all up to the child! Most times, they’ll get around to that milestone when they feel like it
.
My son is 25 months, and is not talking. Babbling all day, and signing…but no words. Follows directions, get his point across, can identify pictures..blah blah…but – I am in a state of constant stress, because I have a pediatrician who insists this is abnormal. He has been to a speech evaluation THREE TIMES. First two times, we were told he scored within normal limits. Third time he still scored within normal limits by ONE “point” – but the therapist saw my Shirley MacLaine Terms of Endearment crazy eyes and said she would ok us for therapy. So, Monday we start. Insurance does not cover it. Which sucks. I don’t know, this whole topic just sucks. I don’t want my sweet boy to struggle, I want to do what is right, but I have no idea what right is.
My girl was a very early walker. She then looked much older than she was because she moved like a kid half-a-year older. So, I got a snide comment from a nanny at our playground. Not talking yet? She also had ten words like Fable when she was 17 MONTHS OLD. Hello??!!
I told the nanny that my kid is only 17 months but in the next breath I thought about how awful it would be to have a kid who had some trouble because they had Downs or autism or happened to be slow and there was a crappy mom or nanny belittling their child for talking late. It’s so nosy and hateful. We all have our weaknesses.
10 months crawling
15 months walked.
24 months full sentences and hasn’t stopped since.
The Mook:
First crawling attempt – 9 months (more of a commando, belly shuffle)
Finally crawled forward: 10 months
Crawled up the stairs: 12 months
Crawled forward: 13 months
Cruised: 14 months
Walked: 15 months
Yep, it was a long road for The Mook.
Talked in sentences? Good question. At 13 months, I split with her dad and I wrote fuck-all down. I know I got a little worried at 18 months when she didn’t have a vocab of 30 words, like the public health poster told me she should have.
I can tell you that she talks now. In full sentences. On and on and on.
Why do we focus on these outward physical developments? How about emotional intelligence? How about the fact my kid, at 4, totally understands the diversity of her friends: family structure (Kira has 2 moms because women can love women and be mommies together) and race (I’m vanilla and Renee’s chocolate and I like both flavors!) and ability.
My son
crawled @ 6 months
walked @ 10 months
full sentences @ 18 months
The crawling and walking early was nice in a way. Mobile baby keeps himself amused easier, but it also made more work for me with all the chasing. I think moving earlier lead us to the “terrible twos” earlier (around 18 months). By two he was so verbal we were pretty much done with all the flailing and screaming.
I had an early bloomer so not going to bore everybody here with stats, but she crawled and then walked on her knees for 2.5 months before she ever took the first step.
Sarah-
I used to work for a state-run Early Intervention Program, and was constantly surprised by how many of the EIP specialists were blatantly biased against children who were shy, uncooperative, or just not in the mood to humor some stranger who wanted them to perform like a trained monkey. I used to get admonished by my superiors for spending too much time trying to establish a good rapport with children before starting a test, or god forbid, saying “please” or “thank you” to them.
There really is a huge spread when it comes to normal infant and toddler development, and as long as a child is developing anywhere within the normal range, it is really impossible to use early milestones to gauge future success.
My own son, now almost 3, crawled at 4 months, walked at 8 months and started talking in sentences at 17 months, which I attribute mostly to his temperament. He is very tenacious and determined, but is often quick to anger and has regular temper tantrums. I am trying to teach him to be more patient and even-tempered, and am jealous of parents who have children who naturally embody those traits, as your children seem to.
Honestly, those milestone things are just the paper/electronic version of the bragging mom at the playground whom we all love to hate. Children develop according to far more complex, irregular, interesting schedules of their own.
Noah took a tentative step at 12 months and was up and running at 14. He had three words at 9 months and had only added about four more by 18 months. Now, at 3.5, his vocabulary and sentence structure are beyond those of many high school kids (past perfect, check; subjunctive, check), but his pronunciation is at least a year behind where it “should” be. A few months ago — say, 3.4 — he finally mastered the fine art of jumping. Can read 5 words. Still drools. I have no idea what this proves, b/c I threw away those milestone books long ago.
I was early at a lot of things, my brother was later.
My daughter is almost three, and was a late walker and crawler. She didn’t crawl until after she was a year old, and didn’t walk until around 16 months. She was and early noisemaker, but late to talk much, likely due to severely plugged up ears. She’s caught up in the talking, a lot. She’s a motormouth now.
I think it is all relative. Kids who are taller for their age are likely to walk/crawl and develop some gross motor skills later, because if you’re taller, you have a lot more to figure out how to move. Kids now are taller than what they used to be, so by that theory, what is “normal” won’t apply because we as humans are changing. Also, some of us are just weird.
The best thing I was ever told by a Dr. was that it doesn’t matter what she does when, as long as there is some progress somewhere in there. The rest works it self out.
Dorian:
Crawled @ 9.5 months (after two months of scooting backwards on his belly!)
Walked @ 14 months
Talked in sentences @ 12 months (first words at 4 months)
Dante:
Crawled @ 8.5 months
Walked @ 11 months
Talked in sentences @ 2.5
My boys are total opposites. Dorian is a talkative little guy who will literally talk your ear off, but he falls over if he tries to kick a ball (takes after me, unfortunately!). Dante, on the other hand, only recently started talking clearly and at 16 months younger than his brother, he has been running and kicking soccer balls since he was a year old! The kid has the physical ability of his father.
I figure kids just grow up with unique abilities and this way the two of them will never be competing in the same arena!
I do think one should not stress too much over “milestones”. Not stressing should not, however, be the same as completely blowing off, well-reasoned medical advice. No offense, but some of the smug judgment in these comments about people who don’t “just chill” when they see problematic developmental patterns in their child, is more than a little screwed up. I’d go on to point out that, for certain disorders, autism leaps to mind, aggressive intervention early on makes a life changing differences for that child. I have two nieces with Autism and my son is on the mild end of ASD. That said, obsessing about milestone doesnot always equal early detection. My autistic son spoke at 9 months, was using sentences at 14 months. He had a precocious vocabulary. It took us awhile to realize he could not have an unscripted conversation, everything he said back then was lifted from a book. If he couldn’t access an appropriate line, he just ignored you.
My DD crawled at 5 months and then took almost a year to try walking. She didnt walk until 15 months. I think it might be temperament also. She is still a cautious kid and when she did she finally walk- she didn’t fall down like her earlier walking friends. It also took her months of practicing before she would jump with both feet off the ground.
I have little advice on this but I will tell you what my great aunt reminded me of once.
“We spend the first few years of their lives making them walk and talk and the rest of their life making them sit down and shut up.”
You have two beautiful smart children.
I’d venture to say that “normal” does not exist, as far as development milestones go. I don’t have kids, though, so I don’t know. I just wanted to comment and tell you, as I’m sure you already know, that Fable is one of the most startlingly beautiful, adorable babies I have ever seen. You’re a lucky mama!
My 19 month old:
Rolled over: 10 mos. (Seriously.)
Crawled: 1 year
Walked: TBD
Talked: Sentences by 17 mos.
Ripley is a cautious one when it comes to any sort of gross motor skill. She took her first steps at 17 months and still only takes a few steps per day. I am not worried. She is my first child, and the reason why I stopped being paranoid around milestones and the like is because I spent the first 6 months of her life in a stressed out, sleep-deprived, miserable haze over stupid shit that didn’t matter. I was so worried about “instilling good sleeping habits” for fear of creating a monster that would never sleep well. A poster on a forum I frequent said it best: “I view those as wasted months when I could have just accepted my fate as a human crib and shed a lot fewer tears.” Eff the baby whisperer crap. I nursed Ripley to sleep, let her have every nap in my arms, sleep on me at night – whatever it took for her to get her best rest. And life was good after that. I was able to put her down wide awake at 7 months, and she started sleeping 12 hours straight around the same time.
Competition between parents stems from insecurity about themselves or their own children. It’s a real shame. We need to support each other.
Enjoy her crawling, knee-walking.. in a blink of an eye she`ll be running around, she`ll be everywhere, climbing on dangerous places and you`ll be running behind her.. so sit back, relax and watch her bloom!
My girl started to walk shortly after her 1st birthday, she`s now 19 months old and does not speak yet.. she has her own weird language, she points to what she wants, but no talking.. I understand her, she understands me and she can say like 5 words and thats it.
All my friends babies are talking and singing.. and she doesn`t talk to me yet.. but you know what, she`s my baby, really, I don`t feel like she`s a toddler and I enjoy it.. they grow so fast, I have all my life to talk to her but just a few months to hear this crazy alien language of hers.
Sophie is 21 months old:
crawled – nine months
walked – 14.5 months
talked in sentences – does night night dada and thank you mama count? she does that at 21 months.
She knows a bunch of words and is starting to put words together, but I wouldn’t say she talks in sentences. We have another baby friend who started walking at 7 months and is talking a lot more than Sophie and is 18 months old. They’re all different, they’ll all catch up.
My lovely girl:
crawling: 8 months
walking: TBD(She just turned 11 months, walking along furniture now)
talking: has a few “words” she uses to identify objects
This is FABULOUS. I love the emphasis on the spectrum of “norm”. My girl is almost 1 and as a new mom several months ago I was SO stressed by a few of her minor complications – she required some physio etc. Fabulous to have a forum to celebrate all the differences and not focus on a specific time line to aspire to
I actually had stress about weight percentiles when my lovely chubby girl reached 99nth percentile for weight!! I was all, way to go babe, and then I got The Comments. So many people telling me not worry, she’ll thin out etc. All the “don’t worries” made me WORRY! I’m long over it, but it was clear that my beefy bebe had some people all in a tizzy. I have to wonder if I would have got the same comments had she been a boy?
Great topic, thanks GGC
I’ve come to realize that people who tend to talk the most about milestones are those whose kids hit them early. So whenever someone tells me that their son walked at 9 months, I secretly reassure myself that they probably didn’t talk until they were 2. Because I think that, if you take all of the above-averages and below-averages and average them out, every kid is probably pretty much average.
My daughter is 18 months old. She:
-crawled at 10 months,
-had ten or so words by 12 months,
-took her first steps with a lot of coaxing at 15 months, but didn’t walk voluntarily until 17 months,
-strings together occasional phrases at 18 months.
I try not to sweat milestones too much. I honestly am not even sure what her first word was, one day it just hit me that her babbling was actually talking. Kids are unique, and they all develop at their own pace, and I am okay with that, even if it is sometimes hard not to feel a little bit inferior when other moms are talking about their amazing early walkers.
Oh, I also wanted to add something.
My karate instructor is always telling me that “watching is learning”. You can practice combinations in your head, and that’s still practice. Some people learn best by watching, and getting it all straight in their head before diving in physically, and some people need to get their hands dirty from the beginning. Which is why I think so much of hitting milestones depends on temperament more than skills or abilities. Watchers are still learning, they just aren’t falling down so much while they learn.
Mason- Will be two in almost exactly 24 hours…
Crawled- 5 months
Walked – 7 months
Sentences- not even close…
Mason is the definition of a meathead. He has amazing coordination, awesome gross and fine motorskills and is sometimes stronger than me. Like I said: meathead. This is all great at the park when he’s doing chin-ups and knee tucks for fun, but can be quite scary when my little angel turns into the HULK because he cannot express himself anyway other than with his strength and movement. AKA frustration tantrum NIGHTMARE. Pair this with an unnatural urge to be dependant and you can imagine the tears that run! He knows quite a few words but does not string them together and it doesnt seem like he will anytime soon. Good luck with your little thinker! Both Archer and Fable are absolutely adorable…
Max:
Crawled @ 5 months
Walked @ 10.5 months
Talked ehhh not so much yet and he’s 12 months
I spend the majority of my time chasing after him profusely sweating. Meanwhile my friends just chill with their babies who aren’t quite at the same stage yet but are the same age. Trust me when I say it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. DO NOT rush it!
What a great encouragement to share and support each other in these crazy-waiting-for-milestone-days.
My babies are clocking in these days @ 14 months- both crawling, one toddling a little (no true walking yet), and about 3 words each that they sometimes, rarely use. Plus a lot of climbing, falling, and figuring out what the heck life is about.
It’s maybe a bit late, totally on time for them, and so very sweet to watch them grow and develop however long they decide to take.
I’m just gonna pipe in here and say I don’t think you should worry. If she didn’t walk at ALL, not even a little bit – then maybe. But she knows how to walk, it sounds like she just doesn’t want to yet! She is her own little person. Mine walked at 13 months, but I have several friends who’s kids didn’t walk until 17 or 18 months. I firmly believe that kids do things in their own time…and screw what all the books say. My kid is turning 2 in April, and he only has a handful of words in his vocabulary – I’ve had several mom’s say something to me about it, worrying about his speech and all. I’m learning to shrug it off because I know he can talk, he just prefers his own language for right now
Fable’s probably thinking we should ALL be cruising around on our knees! hee
My daughter Scout will be 2 in May.
Crawled-7 months
First words-7 months
Walking- 9 months
Sentences of at least 4 words- 1.5 years
Her vocabulary surpasses over 100 words (trust me I have them all written down)
She can count from 1-10 in english and spanish
She can fully tell me what she wants, if she is hurting, when she is ready for a nap/bed and more.
It may sound delightful to some but honestly it has been really hard on me. It sounds crazy I know. I just feel like my “baby” phase was gone so insanely fast. She was walking and talking before her first birthday for crying out loud!!! I am not one of those moms who is pushing for her to do extraordinary things either, it honestly just happened.
So I am guessing this is her normal, whatever the hell normal is!!!
fantastic idea to open up a dialog about this! also really glad to hear that putting your story out/hearing from readers helped with your iud struggles. (:
i’m a first time mama and it is indeed hard sometimes not to stress over milestones, only because like any caring parent, i always want my baby to be thriving and healthy and content! one thing that helps (as you’ve already pointed out) is to real stories from real people instead of just books & statistics…
my poppy girl is 10 months old, and couldn’t give a crap on a stick about crawling. she’s totally content to log-roll anywhere she needs to go! she pulls up, cruises, then squats down and rolls to her next destination. i actually think it’s hilarious! i love that she has her own unique style about things (just like your beautiful kids & their walking habits!) she was also initially “late” on sitting up unsupported, which bothered me at the time, but one day she was all, “it’s cool, i got this now, ma.” i kind of wish i’d never even worried about that one!
on another note, i do think there tends to be a certain unfortunate level of competition that can happen among mothers; even mothers who don’t know each other. instead of excitement, acceptance and support among friends and bloggers, i’m noticing a trend of back biting and attempts to out-do. it’s really too bad, we are all in the same lovely, messy boat after all! i think your attitude about your little ones development is fantastic – they will benefit from your love and acceptance of their individuality.
oh, and as per usual fable’s outfits are to die for.
cheers!
First time commenter!
DS1 Gage:
Crawled @ Never
Sit-shuffled @ 11 months
Walked @ 18 months
Talked in Sentences @ 3-3.5 years – he had 1 sentence at around 3 years and then found his second/third/fourth/fifth/hasn’t stopped talking since at around 3.5 years.
DS2 Olivier:
Crawled @ 10 months
Walked @ 13 months
Talked in sentences @ 2.5 years
DD1 Anais:
Crawled @ 9 months
Walked @ 15 months
Talked in Sentences @ 25 months
DS3 Dylan:
Crawled @ 7 months
Walked @ 12 months (though I still swear it was more like running than walking)
Talked in Sentences @ about a month before he turned 3 was his 1st sentence
DS4 Marin :
Crawled @ 6 months
Walked @ 10 months (he had no choice, his brothers dragged him with them EVERYWHERE)
Talked in Sentences @ around 30 months
DS5 Luc :
Crawled @ 7.5 months
Walked @ TBD
Talked in Sentences @ TBD
DD2 Madeleine :
Crawled @ 8 months
Walked @ TBD
Talked in Sentences @ TBD
Luc & Madeleine just passed their 10 months and Luc can stand up unaided, Madeleine can stand up holding on to the sofa or table or somebody’s hands.
All of mine were ‘late’ talkers and I expect my youngest two to be the same because we are a multilingual household and the kids seem to sort out the languages from each other before they start stringing sentences together in any of them.
I got the feeling with Gage, though, that he was waiting for us to stop using ‘baby language’ around him, he skipped childlike language when he began talking and seemed unimpressed by DH and I when we tried to use childlike words around him. Marin was much the same and had a killer ‘withering look’.
I was raised in a multilingual environment and spoke very late, whereas one of my brothers spoke at less than a year old, and would have adults come up to him and say ‘oh look at you you’re so cute, aren’t you beautiful’ in a baby-talk kind of way and he would say, ‘yes, i am, thank you.’ and really shock them.
Oh man, do I hear you about the milestones. I was sweating bullets for Little Miss Kickboxer to finally start crawling at 13 months. Now, at 14 months, she’s finally up on her knees, rather than doing that army thing. And just today, she *finally* started pulling herself up on things, into a standing position. I expect her to walk by, oh, the time she graduates from kindergarten. Same thing with talking–even though I’m probably to blame in that department because I speak only German to her while the rest of the world explains things to her in English. She should know 2 or so words by now and … does lots of excited bwabwabwa-ing and whatnot, but “thank you” or “dankeschoen”? Nah. Nada. She can, however, carry a tune in the right key and drum up a storm to any song in the correct measure. So we know her hearing’s right on. Must be the bilingual thing.
Anyway, I’m with you. Probably way more nervous than you, but with you.
Oldest:
Crawled @ 12 months
Walked @ 13 months
Talked in sentences @ 1,5y
I always assumed he hated crawling so much that he figured out how to walk shortly after. There was like three weeks of difference. And his crawling was never the quick, elegant movements you see in ordinary babies. He looked more like a crab.
Youngest:
Crawled @ 11 months
Walked @ 15 months
Talked in sentences @ 2,5y, and still learning in pronounciation.
My youngest also was able to walk before he started using that method as a means of transportation. He practiced it when he thought we weren’t looking: to the table, to the sofa… He only started to walk when he knew he could do it. One day, he just got up and walked. His brother was so surprised.
In regards to your post: the same goes for me. The first you push and push and you leave the second one up to nature.
“He’ll learn eventually”.
They all do.
Kaden Truth (5 1/2)
crawled- before 6 months
walked- 10 months
talked in sentences- before 2
Noble Otis (4 1/2)
Crawled- never, he rolled everyhwere, then learned to walk.
walked-just shy of 14 months
talked in sentences- 3+
I also have two twin daughters, Nova Joy and Thea Simone who will be 7 months old soon. One was growth resricted and is much smaller. Their developmental differences have been very evident from birth, and I’m constantly reminding myself that they are two seperate individuals who will be very different, and have their own strengths and weakneses. My boys are only a year apart and I thought it was hard not to compare them…but twins are even harder not to compare.
Thanks for opening this dialogue, I think it’s important to see the variations of “normal”.
Peace~
Karen
I’m sure everything will be fine…
My oldest turns 3 next month. He:
crawled – 6 months
cruised – 8 months
walked – full time before 10 months
by 18 months could say 100+ things and by 2 spoke in full sentences…
My youngest will be 1 next month. She:
Crawled – 8 1/2 months
cruised – 10 months
still is not walking or saying anything.
My husband constantly worries that something is “wrong” with her, but I keep reminding him that it’ll some in time!
Boy #1 spoke his first word at 9 months and was speaking in fully coherent sentences by the age of 2.
Boy #2 came along and, at his 18 month checkup, I stated my concern to the pediatrician that he wasn’t speaking as much as his brother had. He said, “Hang in there and we’ll discuss it again at his 2 year checkup.” Fast forward a couple months and my boy was speaking in full sentences.
The only thing I would ask is, when she does stand up and take a few steps, does she appear to be in pain? Does anything about it look worrisome? If that’s not the case, then it’s probably just a matter of her taking her own sweet time.
My daughter will be 3 in June, and I have been obsessing about getting her potty trained. Like bad. I’m a wreck. I hear you, and the pressure from others doesn’t help. (If one more person says, “I potty trained my 18 month old in 3 days!” I will stab them in the eye with a spork.)
That being said…
She sat up alone at 4 months.
She didn’t smile until 5. Really. I know–most smile in the hospital. Rowan didn’t. She was known as a very sober baby. (No longer true.)
She didn’t roll over until about 8 months. (!!!)
She cruised the furniture (walkingish) at 9 months.
She crawled at 10. Walking went out the window.
She walked at 13.
I don’t remember when her first words were, but it seemed like she didn’t have much, until about 15 months. By 18 months, it was scary. The nurse asked if she had 4 or 5 words. I replied she had about 200. She rolled her eyes and gave me the “whatever” look, but then Rowan warmed up and started speaking, she agreed completely. Now, she carries on full conversations with just about anyone and has the vocabulary of about a 3rd grader. (She’s 2 1/2.) When they did the autism spectrum survey, I was told, “you have absolutely nothing to worry about.”
She can count to 10 in three languages, and 20 in English. ABC’s learned by 20 months. Loads the dishwasher for me. Changes her own Pull-Up. Loves to feed the dog and give her medicine, drinks her espresso black (not joking), and goes to restaurants regularly with no behavior issues. She loves to choose her own clothes, does a fair job of matching, and always adds jewelry. When I get dressed up particularly nicely, she says, “Mommy, you look beautiful! I love your dress.” Yesterday, out of the blue, I heard, “Mommy, you take good care of me. Thank you, Mommy!”
And she still poops her pants.
A friend gave me some great advice yesterday. “They have raised kids, but they haven’t raised Rowan (Archer, Fable.)” I think I might embroider that on a sampler.
I sometimes think the charts and graphs and “normal” milestones and all that should just not exist. Seriously. Some kids are walking at 8 months, some are walking at 2 years. It is what it is. And it’s nothing we as parents are doing or not doing, because who *doesn’t* want their child to walk? Eventually? My kids have been treated by military doctors, who for some reason, think children should be walking, talking little potty-trained geniuses by 18 months. Huge, too. My second child was tiny. Still is. But then my husband is only 5’6″ and I’m 5′, so we’re probably not going to have the tallest children, you know? The doctors at Fort Drum were soooooo concerned with him “not being on the growth chart”, running test after test (and getting a urine sample from a toddler is NOT FUN), having us keep a food journal, even telling us that it could be anything from a growth disorder to cancer. Turns out? They told us, “he’s just going to be small.” You think?! OMG.
My kids all crawled, walked, talked at different ages. And I think they reached different milestones at different times for several reasons – they’re different people, first of all, and each had different circumstances. My husband was deployed during two of my kids’ babyhood, and both of them walked and talked earlier than the baby who has had Daddy here all the time. Coincidence? Maybe.
My baby just turned 2, and he’s not saying much (and I’m not worried, because with 3 older siblings? the kid has 3 spokespeople lol), which I’m sure means the military will want him to undergo several tests and then tell us, “he’ll talk when he feels like it, no big deal.” We encourage him to use words, read to him, ask the older kids not to talk “for” him, but you know? If he doesn’t talk until he’s 3? It’s okay. I try to only worry when it’s necessary. Doctors are doing what they’re trained to do, I know, and I suppose some form of “normal” has to exist in the medical world in order to catch/diagnose problems. But they needn’t be so psycho about it. And get parents upset and worried over what amounts to nothing. Well, at least in my experience – military docs seem to be a different breed. LOL
Milo:
Crawled @6 months
Walked @9 months
Talking in complete sentences @3 years
He was always ahead of milestones physically (running, jumping, catching ball with two hands, etc.) but his language was pretty delayed. He’s 6 now and is in speech class and doing a lot better.
Boston
Crawled @9 months
Walked @12 months
Talked in full sentences @2 years
He was my normal baby. He’s gonna be one of those people that just kinda floats through life and loves it. He’s incredibly laid back and takes nothing very seriously and I love it
.
R.J (Ryker Jack)
Crawled @7 months
He’s almost a year old now and doesn’t talk in full sentences or walk yet. He just army crawls everywhere!
Fable is so pretty, and I’m incredibly jealous. I want a baby girl so bad (I wouldn’t trade any of my boys for a room full of girls!). Maybe someday….just gotta convince the husband.
My oldest daughter walked at 9 months and could talk in sentences at a year old.
My son (in the middle) never crawled but would scoot around in the sitting position by stretching his legs in and out. He never walked until he was about 17 months then got up and walked like he had been practicing behind my back. It took him until he was about 2 to actually start speaking. He grunted mostly for some reason.
My youngest daughter walked at a year and talked at a year as well.
They are all grown now and here is where they stand: My oldest daughter isn’t very athletic but her command of language is fantastic. She speaks Spanish and French fluently. She’s probably the brightest of my three children although we couldn’t get her to finish college because she hates school and would be rather out in the work force learning that way. She is a people person.
My son, after seemingly taking forever to do everything compared to his sister, is the most athletic of all my children. He plays college hockey, baseball, and is a runner. He’s bright without working at it but could be brilliant if he did.
My youngest is very athletic as well although she tends to want to excel in school more than athletics. She plays college volleyball and tennis. She is highly motivated to succeed in everything but must work hard to get the results she wants. She is aggresive and is the best public speaker of my three and the most determined to be successful at EVERYTHING she does. She has the most difficult personality but I love her endlessly anyway.
Want advice? Tell milestones to kiss your ass. I was a nanny for 12 years, a teacher and now a mama. EVERY kiddo is different. MY one year old can walk (like a drunk zombie) but realizes he is much faster on his knees or crawling. I don’t push a thing. Our kids are smart. They know what they can do and when they are ready to do it. Enjoy them, they grow up fast and you will feel silly that you ever worried! Trust your mama instincts!
Lochlan (now 4) crawled at 9 months, walked exactly one week after his first birthday, signed his first word after age 1, signed in sentences at around 16/17 months, talked in sentences after 2 (because he was immersed in an ASL environment).
Kalle (now 16 months) crawled at 10 months, walked at 15 months, signs a bit but not as clear or as consistent at Lochlan did at the same age, no signed or spoken sentences yet.
Amazing how each kid is different. They truly bloom at their own pace which makes them awesomely unique individuals! No worries for me here.
My Kanicky is 8 months and hasn’t crawled at all. She falls flat when put on her knees, and rolls to whichever place she’d like to go. Her pediatrician seems to think she’ll walk instead of crawling. She doesn’t speak, rather she says “oooh” and blows raspberries. She does her own version of a couple of baby signs, all relating to food. She pulls herself up to stand, but topples easily and absolutely cannot stand on her own. I’m okay with whatever she decides to do, and when she’d like to do it…as long as she gives me time to figure out where to put my laptop cables before she starts walking!
My child is in third grade now, and I don’t even remember when he did what. It just doesn’t matter, in the grand scheme of life. I think over-analyzing this issue is a waste of time.
I’m going to be very interested in these comments…
My son walked independently and quite well for the first time at 14 months. He did it for one day, and then refused to do it again until 17 months, at which point he stood up at the park and took off running across the grass. He is kind of a stubborn kid and just doesn’t do things until he’s ready. He got around pretty well sliding on his belly at 6 months, crawled for real at 8 months, but he just saw no use for walking!
My daughter is exactly the same so far–belly sliding at 6 months, crawling at 8 months, and at 13.5 months walks well holding onto one finger or pushing a toy, but just isn’t ready mentally to do it alone. We shall see…
People would always freak out about our son’s lack of walking in public, but we knew he could do it, so we weren’t worried. Our doctor also said that as long as he could support weight on his legs and cruise along furniture, we’d talk at 18 months if he still didn’t walk. But he didn’t even seem like 18 months would be a huge concern.
Apparently we just produce kids with no interest in walking independently!
I have four children and they’re all different.
My oldest crawled at six months, climbed a flight of stairs a week later, walked at nine months. Obviously, on the early side of things. On the other hand, she didn’t really talk until she turned 2. By contrast, her best buddy at the time was speaking in full sentences at one and singing all the lyrics to “Frosty the Snowman” by 18 months. It was hard not to get freaked out by the dramatic difference but I didn’t let it worry me (too much) and today you wouldn’t know who talked or walked first.
I had twins next and they defied the gender stereotypes. My daughter did everything physical first. While her brother was speaking in full sentences at 18 months. They’re 3 now and just about on par with one another. Contrary to the early signals, he can kick a ball better but she’s the one who remembers new songs from preschool.
And finally, my youngest son, who is a month older than Fable. He was walking at 10 months and he’s a fearless climber at the playground. But he’s my latest talker… by far! Good thing he’s my fourth because at this point, with all of my experience, I’m just not phased by it. I KNOW he understands everything so I figure he’ll get around to talking when he thinks it’s necessary. He has a handful of words: Mama, Papa, Bath, Yes. Other than that? Nothing much. He has one made-up word “Ish” that he uses for everything.
So, unless your pediatrician thinks there’s a need for intervention, don’t sweat it. And, even if the doctor does call for some intervention, I wouldn’t sweat that either.
There’s a reason the range for milestones is so wide — they all develop differently. My kids prove it. And it doesn’t matter who hits it first. It’s not a sign that the child is any brighter or more sporty… not a sign that one parent bests another.
I suspect you already know this and you’re just looking for us to remind you that you’re right. Rebecca, you’re right!
It’s so funny, because when we are 12 year old girls complaining to our mothers about how we are the only one without a period, or without boobs, our mothers just say, you just have to wait, there is no rush. But when your baby isn’t walking yet, everyone starts freaking out!
I’m still on my first and she’s only 7 months old so I don’t have a lot to add here, but I wanted to say this:
At 7 months, she is extremely interested in walking. She can sometimes pull herself up on a chair (or my pants leg!), and she can easily take steps when holding onto my hands and more tentatively when she’s holding on to said chair and really wants to reach the shiny diaper pail. She has absolutely no interest in crawling, but she fusses like mad whenever she is sitting still.
We went to buy her a baby walker the other day because she wants to move so much, but when the store people found out she was only 7 months old, one of them said “too young for walking!” like I was some kind of crazy parent that was just pushing her to get moving. It made me question my motives, like maybe I was somehow pushing her.
I never wanted an early walker–I know it’s going to be a lot more work. But when she’s so excited about something, I want to encourage her.
I guess what I’m hoping to take from this discussion is that hitting milestones late is fine, but hitting them early is fine too–it doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re some kind of overly competitive parent, or that your child is doomed to peak early and be boring and average as an adult. I mean, can only late bloomers be geniuses?
I’m not sure of the times when she went through the milestones, but if it makes you feel any better…my little sister used to run on her knees for months before she actually walked. Now? She’s very athletic, and is a neurologist. She may have hit those milestones a bit later, but she went so far past the rest of us when she got to her potential!
reed (girl) 2 1/2:
crawled @ 9 months
walked @ 1 year
words @ 1 year
simple sentences @ 16 months
beckett (boy) 15 months
crawled @ 6 months
walked @ 10 months
words @ what is considered a word? he makes sounds that sound to me like what i know he is trying to say. but, not actual understandable-by-the-non-parent-words, no! not yet.
i say… i’m cool with whatever schedule feels comfortable to them. sure i want beckett to talk, but only because it would be fun for me to communicate with him and know what he is saying. is her perfectly happy grunting, sighing, yelling, and making other uncatagorizable sounds? yes, i say… very happy, indeed!
My son is one year (as of last week), he crawled around 8 months and walked on his own around 11 months. So, I guess he is early. However, he just ran into the coffee table and hit his head, so there is that…
Those pictures of Fable walking on her knees are the best! What a beauty.
There is a reason why children are very rarely diagnosed with developmental disorders before the age of 3 (or are given provisional or “wait and see” diagnoses). There is a W-I-D-E range of development.
Think about it this way: You can drive from SF to LA taking either HWY 1, 101, or 5. They’ll all get you there eventually, but some wind this way and that way (and has great scenery) or you can there quick and easy through the desert. At the end of the day, all that matters is that you’re there at the end of the day. Each person that gets there is no more or less able or competent of a driver, but each has had a different driving experience. Personally, I’d prefer the ocean route, much more beautiful.
From someone who studies it, teaches it, and diagnoses it: Before the age of 3, wait and see.
My son did everything early, he was walking and talking at his first birthday. He knew the alphabet (recite and identify) by 18 months.
Now he is 4 AND STILL NOT POTTY TRAINED!!!!!
Sometimes they are the tortoise, sometimes they are the hare, either way they’ll get there (hopefully, kindergartens around the corner).
Love this. Great point T Swizzle:
“Think about it this way: You can drive from SF to LA taking either HWY 1, 101, or 5. They’ll all get you there eventually, but some wind this way and that way (and has great scenery) or you can there quick and easy through the desert. At the end of the day, all that matters is that you’re there at the end of the day. Each person that gets there is no more or less able or competent of a driver, but each has had a different driving experience. Personally, I’d prefer the ocean route, much more beautiful.”
Oh, also? I’m not worried, you guys!
I thought I made that clear in my post!
I wanted to gather your stories to help showcase normal milestones… and how varied they all are… for parents of late bloomers, early bloomers, etc – just to show how VARIED the marks are.
Sera: Crawled @ 9 months, walked @ 13/14 months, talked at 20 months
Gemma: Crawled @ 6 months, walked at 13 months, TBD, currently 2 y/o
I am told that I never crawled, just walked at 9 months, talked at 9 months too. Overachiever me. My husband was worried about Gemma not talking, but she’s starting to speak a little bit more now, so for now he is quiet.
Ahhh! Fable is looking like such a little girl!!!! I cannot believe it.
Most of the time (not ALL of the time) babies who walk “later” do so because they are carried too much and don’t have enough time to build up the muscle tone to walk around. More floor time would be good, but watch those knees because “walking” on them can actually cause damage.
I have to comment on this because this was a source of worry for us as well. My daughter started to walk at about 13 months…but she would only go for about a distance of six feet, then she would walk on her knees for the rest of the way. She walked a little like a drunken sailor, but we figured she’d get better. At first we weren’t that worried because WE SAW HER WALK! SHE KNOWS HOW TO DO IT…but, for some reason she didn’t want to. She barely walked in the house, and would never EVER attempt to walk outside. Well, this went on until she was 18 months (we asked the doc about it before and he said that since we’ve seen her walk that we shouldn’t be too concerned) and then she started to walk a lot more, but she still walked like she was drunk and fell over A LOT. So, we took her in again, and finally got her approved to see a specialist. The new doc said that her ligaments were too loose so she prescribed ankle braces. She loves wearing them so much that she’ll ask for them. She’s 25 months now, and she still can’t fully run, but she can walk pretty fast and doesn’t fall as much. She even walks a little better without the braces too. To make a long story short I’d say: crawled at 7 months, first steps at 13 months, WALKED at 21 months, speaks in full sentences…still waiting on that one!
Gabby
Crawled: 9 or 10 months
Walked: 12 months
Fluent: 2yrs 4months
My almost 16-month old:
Crawled: 6.5 months
Walked: 12 months
Sentences: TBD — She has about 50-60 words right now but only says one at a time!
Juliet was on the earlier end of milestones for most things. We would joke that she is a genius, but my husband and I knew that it was just her personality. She wanted to move, move, move. Now, she loves to name things and parrot. It’s just who she is.
I remember, when she was around 1 week old, wondering how you ever get anything done while holding a baby because you have to support her neck at all times. Then, I realized, that once she learned how to hold up her head, she would basically never NOT know how to hold it up. Once she learned to crawl, she would always be mobile. Once she walked, she would never be a “non-walker”. This realization made milestones seem a lot more bittersweet. I could handle getting less done, because soon, she would never need me to hold up her head again. Even though my arms ached sometimes, soon, she would be capable of walking everywhere herself. I lost so much of my new mom anxiety, and desire to see the NEXT BIG THING that Juliet could do, once I started appreciating the time before the milestones for what they are — fleeting moments that you can never really get back.
Ah, I love reading stories like this — esp. with my ‘late bloomer babe’. I’ve never really been too worried about it — G is smallish for her age (just under 19lbs at 13 months) and she didn’t crawl til late. Well, really she just scoots and doesn’t crawl unless on carpet when it’s harder to butt-scoot.
She hasn’t taken any steps, but my partner didn’t walk til 17-months. My mom says I walked 11-months, but I’m pretty happy with her taking her time
Graduating with my MD in May. I think I commented back on the “Fable has a big head post” along the same lines. Haven’t read all the other comments but I will say this – in general, docs will be concerned when kids miss multiple milestone markers in a given subset/age group and then do not show signs of “catching up” at subsequent points in time. ONE “missed/delayed” milestone is generally treated as individual variation and the docs will practice what is called “watchful waiting” wherein said kiddo is observed to see how they continue on. If Fable were someone I saw in clinic, I’d likely only “worry” from a medical perspective right now if she was delayed in multiple ways. If she IS walking on her own occasionally, then she’s capable of it and she likely will when she’s ready. I’d probably schedule a follow-up visit for a few months to keep a close eye on her, but I wouldn’t be more concerned than that.
As a follow-up, the other time we, as medical professionals “get concerned” is when a kid has been zipping along meeting milestones and then suddenly drops off and starts missing a bunch. That’s a red flag. But from what it sounds like, Fable is fine and I think you should consider “watchful waiting” a good strategy.
Our son:
Crawled @ 12.5 months
Walked @ 17.5 months
Talked in phrases @ 9 months
Talked in sentences @ starting around 12 months
My daughter learned to roll everywhere at five months (like, she would roll across the room to get a toy, pivot, roll another direction to grab a snack, etc.), crawled at seven months, and took her first steps at 10.5 months. She’s almost a year now and still mostly crawls, although she’ll surprise us (and herself) sometimes by shambling most of the way across a room before dropping to her knees again. She dances and waves and plays peekaboo and imitates the Jeopardy Daily Double sound and understands reasonably complex instructions and puts peg shapes into their proper slots all by herself, so I don’t spend much time worrying that her speech hasn’t progressed beyond dada, mama and uh oh. They all figure it out at their own pace.
Axel crawled at 7 months, walked at 12 months, and just started sentences (27 months) – which I was actually a little worried about, because he has this genius little friend chatting away at 18 months. Jonas is crawling now, at 7 1/2 months, but has yet to do anything else.
I, myself, walked at 10 months, and I am one clumsy adult, stumbling into walls and such. So early walking doesn’t appear to mean all that much.
Love TSwizzle’s phrase – before the age of three, wait and see. I think it’ll be my new mantra.
Lola is 18 months
crawled- 11 months
walked- 14 months
sentances- TBD she says words but no sentances yet, only 2 words for now
She was a “late bloomer” according to most, but I wasn’t worried. I figured she would do things when she was ready.
I love this! Everyone loves to talk about their kids and it’s amazing to read the differences in development. I have never really worried about it. Both of my kids were fairly ‘early’ in their development.
Jacob crawled at 8 months and walked at 9 months. He said his first word at 9 months and was talking in complete sentences before he turned 2. He is 3.5 now and talks nonstop. There has been talk of having him evaluated for ADHD but I’m not buying it. He just has a very energetic personality!
Emrick crawled at 5 months and said her first word ( it was ‘move’ which should have been our warning sign!) at barely 6 months. She turned 1 last Friday and began walking at 11 months, and runs around all over the place now. She can answer yes/no questions and has a handful of words. She is very fiesty/moody
Have you tried these:
http://www.amazon.com/Leather-Squeaky-Shoes-Brown-Emily/dp/B001E5H4MW/ref=sr_1_41?ie=UTF8&s=shoes&qid=1267418449&sr=8-41
My 16 month old loves her squeaky shoes. These are very similar to her See Kai Runs, which I love.
She bops all around the house loving the noise! I can’t speak to a late walker, but I do have late talkers. Maybe because we practice sign language. Either way my children sign like crazy and communicate and understand everything. And when my oldest did start speaking more than signing, she really took off and getting her to stop talking is the real trick now.
Okay, I think we get it. Every child is different. Period. Peace out.
Not to worry. I didn’t walk until like 20, 22 months? Of course, I spent my whole life as an uncoordinated klutz always chosen last for the team, BUT in my late 20′s I took karate for five years and kicked ASS, and ran, and lifted weights. All of my physical accomplishments (especially gaining rank in karate) far outweighed my academic accomplishments, being the quick-witted, intelligent person that I am.
If Fable can take some steps but chooses to walk on her knees, does that mean she’ll grow up Catholic? (Just Kidding and no offense to any Catholic readers.) She’ll be fine. Archer is fine.
Although I didn’t comment on the contraception thread, I have got to say that I tried all kinds of things too, IUD, pill, foam, condoms, etc. but what really worked because I used it FAiTHFULLYU was a diaphragm. No hormonal side effects. Yeah, sometimes it was a pain to stop and put it in but it always worked. Then after I had the two kids I planned on, I got my tubes tied! Oh glorious freedom! Never to worry again if my period was late. It’s a good option when you know you are done. Or if your husband decides he is done, he can go for it. It’s actually less complicated for men than women but my old-fashioned, Wyoming MAN did not want to cooperate with that one.
My 19 month old started walking at 14 months, but what worries me is his speech. He doesnt have many clear words. Sometimes he’ll surprise us with a really good word, then he never says it again. Never.
My 13 year old son was a late talker. We were so worried that he was in a special ed preschool. He started really talking at about 3 1/2 and hasn’t stopped since. No more special ed. So yes, they all come into their own within their own time. But when you’re in the thick if it, it’s hard not to worry.
Comments are gone now?
My daughter hit all her milestones right around the “correct” time or early. My son is now 20 months old and still says maybe 2 words that we know, but nothing else. The hard part for me is I know he can say them, but he just doesn’t want to. He is way more interested in how the vacuum cleaner comes apart than talking to me about anything or at least anything I can understand. My only issue is that my nephew didn’t talk until he was 3 and even then you couldn’t make out most words. My family was all over my brother and his wife about how he needed special classes and they are already on me not to let my son end up like my nephew. I want to let him do it on his own. There’s nothing wrong with his comprehension. He can do anything I ask of him, he just doesn’t feel the need to talk to me…or anyone else about it. It makes me feel so much better to know that my son isn’t the only late talker.
I’ve seen a broad spectrum of kids coming through my daughters’ daycare over the years. There have been several 18,19,20 month walkers. All of them “normal” – no physical problems, no mental issues, now 2.5 or 3 or 4 or 5 and happy, healthy, running kids. One girl didn’t crawl or walk until 1.5 – she scooted on her bottom using her hands.
My daughter walked the day after she stood without holding on to something for the first time. Our good friend’s son (same age) stood independently for 2 months before he took more than a step.
Kids are different. They do things in their own time. I am convinced it is not just about their “ability” or “development”, but has a lot to do with their personality. The world may just look nicer to Fable on her knees.
First off, my doctor told me there has been some consideration in regards to pushing the “walking milestone” since kids who are back sleepers tend to walk later (milestone was set before the Back to Sleep movement).
I have four kids (youngest our 5 year old twins) and they were all over the map when it came to hitting their milestones. I think as a mom, it’s important to keep a healthy balance between avoiding comparison but also being realistic about recognizing when a child might need a little help and advocating for early intervention.
I’ve never been one to panic about milestones, but when youngest son wasn’t walking at 18 months my gut told me he needed help. After testing, the doctor recognized he needed PT & OT…now he’s 5 and on track to start kindergarten thanks to early intervention. Middle son was the same way with speech, weekly speech therapy helped him along to where he needed to be in order to start school feeling confident.
I think it’s important not to be too consumed with milestones, but keep a healthy awareness and trust your gut when the time comes that you think a child might need a little extra help.
But in your case, you’ve seen Fable takes some steps on her own…seems she might just feel it’s easier/faster to get around on her knees!
my kids were all on the early side, but it just meant i had to chase them sooner!
i’m so glad that you’ve said this though, so that those parents who do worry about milestones may heed your advice and relax.
Early Milestones:
He knew all of his letters & colors & shapes before he was walking. Was talking in complete sentences by a year & could carry on a conversation with an adult by a 2. He’s 5, & has been reading (self-taught) since he was 4. Taught himself to write around 3.5.
Milestones Crossed Too Early:
He hasn’t taken a nap since he turned 2. This is creating a problem for his Pre-K teacher, because he doesn’t see any need to lie down for nap time. She used to let him sit in the book corner & read, but it disturbed the other children (they wanted to be able to do that, too), so now he’s stuck behind the easel & is constantly in trouble for sitting up. He started school in August. It’s what? March 1st? He hasn’t taken a single nap at school, but bless his teacher, she’s still trying.
Late Blooming Moment:
My son crawled early, but waited until he was 15-months-old & at the St Patrick’s Day Parade to begin walking (into the parade route). Also, he wasn’t potty trained until he was over 4. We worked with him & struggled, & couldn’t understand what was going on with him. What was the most confusing part, was that he *knew* when he needed to go – He would hide in a closet, or go to his room & shut the door & do his business out of sight. One time he hid his dirty pants in under my mom’s dresser while he was there for a visit. That was an embarrassing phone call.
___
On a side note – my brother didn’t talk until he was 4 and a half. That’s Pre-K age, people. He’s fine now. He ended up graduating with a degree in English from Emory University in Atlanta & is, aptly enough, a Montessori school teacher.
My oldest:
crawled – 7 mos.
walked – 9 mos.
talked in sentences – 16 mos.
however…pottytrained at 3 1/2
My youngest:
crawled – 8 mos.
walked – 11 mos.
talked in sentences – 18 mos.
pottytrained – TBD (she’s 2 1/2)
When you’re stressed, read Leo the Late Bloomer by Robert Kraus. LOVE that book. Don’t watch….and they all bloom
Let me count the ways I hate the milestones. I really do feel like they add such huge stress on parents and even though I now try to not pay attention to them, I have to admit I still worry. My almost 18 month old daughter has always been a little late with things, but when she did start walking at about 14 months, she skipped walking and went to running. It was like she didn’t want to do it till she was sure. Same thing with crawling. She wasn’t gonna do it till she was positive she could go at blazing speeds. My current stressor is words. I am constantly worried that she isn’t saying enough (about 4 words). That something might not be ok. And I hate it.
I hope I’m not too late on this! I think about this all the time. At my baby’s 4 month checkup the doctor told us “he could be stronger…his muscles are lower tone” and nothing to worry about as long as he progressed. Yeah, don’t go home and google “low muscle tone” — I was whipped into constant worry. Baby did progress just fine and at his 6 month checkup when baby was sitting up for the doctor, (and I neurotically quizzed him on his previous comments and if we needed to look into Early Intervention) — he firmly told me “no” and that baby had progressed enough and was going to be just fine, nothing else perhaps other than not a star football player. I still can’t shake it. The nagging feelings of “What if I just called Early Intervention — then everyone would have some peace of mind….and if there’s something to deal with, we deal with it now when it’s easier.” Granted, here at 7.5 months, he sits up, he’s totally fine, but he can’t pull himself up from laying down to sitting and still HATES tummy time and barely pushes up. I just fear not doing anything, then looking back and wishing I had picked up the phone. Thoughts??
I have one daughter, 8 months old, who at 2, 4, and 6 months was OFF THE CHARTS for height and weight. We’re not talking 95th percentile or the 99th. We’re talking statistical outlier, a dot far above the chart in no man’s land, apparently the most obese baby ever to have existed. After she started crawling? Hasn’t gained an ounce.
I have a good friend whose mother thought he might have mental retardation (and yes, that’s a technical DSM term), because he wasn’t speaking, at all, at the age of 3. Now? He’s an IBM employee making mega bucks.
My point? Ms. Nature does things on her own timeline and everything has a reason. Love every second!
This is sort of a strange mile marker because my second is still in utero and is apparently ‘behind’ in the growing of the head department. I was 18 weeks when they told me she was measuring in the 4th percentile for head size and I would need to come back in 4 weeks, FREAKED ME RIGHT THE EFF OUT! So, I go home and do tons of research over a tear soaked keyboard I discovered that ‘normal’ is between the 5-95th percentile and a +/- 2 percentile points above or below ‘normal’ is nothing to worry about if everything else is in order. And I also read that some kids just have smaller heads (or larger ones in your case) and that 80% of babies with smaller head size are normal, and it also depends on maternal size (me being 5’3″ 100lbs pre prego). I WAS PISSED…they worried me so about this without telling me all the facts so that maybe I wouldn’t go home and drown in the depths of sorrow over the fact that there may be something wrong with my baby. ARGHHHHH!
I spoke in full sentences when I was one and I was very petite and now that I have a daughter everyone compares her to me, it breaks my heart. It’s like they don’t think she’s as smart as I am (and believe me, I ain’t that smart) or that being bigger (and healthier than I was in her case) is not as cute. She is the UNIVERSE and I pale in comparison, if everyone can only see that…
My daughter is almost 2 and a half and a genius when it comes to communication and words. She knows her ABCs and the sounds each letter makes. She can count to 20, and to 10 in Spanish. She speaks mostly in complete sentences.
BUT, I still can’t get the kid to go peepee and poopoo on the potty. Sigh.
Man, Jane is 2.5 and she is talking and walking now, but when did she start? I guess I must not be that worried about the milestones if I am so hazy but I think…
Walking 13 months?
Talking in sentences 18 months?
Crawling, I have absolutely no idea.
I really need to start writing this sort of thing down.
boy #1:
crawled @ 7 mos.
walked (without holding on to anything) @ 16 mos.
talked (fluently) @ 3 yo (he’s 10 now and on “the spectrum”)
boy #2:
crawled 6 mos.
walked @ 12 mos.
talked (fluently) by 2 yo
girl:
crawled @ 6 mos.
walked @ 10 mos.
talked (fluently) by 15 mos.
i love milestones for personal reasons, but hate that people seem to love to induce paranoia in other parents by judging when the milestones are reached. everyone is different, people. geez.
Trevor
crawled: 7 months
walked: on his first birthday
full sentences: 2.5 years
potty trained? he is 3.5 and will hold it all day even with sitting on the potty
Mallory
crawled: never she pulled herself with her arms and pushed with her left foot while dragging her leg behind her
walked: this weekend at 14 months
full sentences: she has about 10 words including hi-ya (while karate chopping)
I try not to compare their stages of development for many reasons. The one reason that stands out the most is Trevor was 8 pounds 14 ounces at birth while Mallory was 6 pounds 1 ounce.
Instead we focus on celebrating the differences and explain to them how unique each trait makes them and how amazing it makes our family.
14 month-old-daughter
don’t remember crawling, walked at 11 months. But at 14 months has two top and two bottom teeth and has a gag reflex that would make a Paris runway model green with envy. Until last week she still had to have everything pureed. Any texture makes her gag. Now she can do VERY TINY little bites of various things, but trying to feed her is done at your own risk and is not for the squeamish. I watch babies much younger than she gobble down chicken nuggets with mac ‘n cheese. I just show her how they do it – maybe I can get peer pressure to work in my favor.
My son never really crawled in the traditional sense. He scooted on his rear for a bit and then around 8/9 months he was up on his hands and feet with his little butt in the air, instead of knee crawling. He then did this odd tripod thing for a minute before realizing he had feet and could stand on them and ohhh, it was off to the races at 10.5 months. He hasn’t stopped since that day(I’m tired…). He is very vocal at home but not at daycare. I think he just soaks it all up on the 2 days he attends and comes home to chat and chat and chat with us. At 19 months he has a handful of 2 to 3 word sentences. We roll with him and have from day one. It is what works for us.
You guys are awesome. Thanks for sharing!
Instead of telling us the averages, which are actually not that informative; maybe they should tell us the range, which would help us understand that it’s “normal” to do such-and-such by between this age and that. That sure would have helped me.
My daughter is 20 months.
Crawled: 12 months
Walked: Still waiting
Words: None
I wasn’t worried about her delays either until I decided to bite the bullet and call the Early Intervention/Early Start people … it’s a FREE SERVICE with awesome people who COME TO MY HOUSE to help us encourage Phoebe to walk and talk. They diagnosed her with having hypotonia (low muscle tone) which is why walking is so difficult for her. I never would have known if I hadn’t called them. And now? Two months later? She’s taking steps on her own. 4 – 5 at a time, not all the time, but she’s doing it!
And the service is only available (in California at least) until the child is 3 … so I disagree with the poster who says “Until 3 wait and see” … there are services available if needed before then.
She’s making progress, but might possibly have a neurological disorder.
So … blood tests … pediatric neurologist … etc. … but we want to make sure she’s okay so we are covering all bases.
We think she’s perfect, and I never ever ever would have called the early start people except I thought “What’s the harm?”
It sucks to have to worry … but it’s good to do everything you can.
I still don’t compare her milestones with anyone else’s … she’s different! My aunts kids were all late walkers and talkers, so I wasn’t worried about her. But I’m glad I called. If only to now be more informed.
My 26 month old:
crawled at 6.5 months
walked at 11.5 months
talked fluently….at two years old?
In other words: shockingly appallingly average, hitting every damn milestone on target.
The crazy thing? We still worry all the time! At 18 months she only had a couple of words, and we were PARANOID and certain that she was speech delayed, because other girls her age had so so much more speech than she did. Now it doesn’t matter, she has caught up and is fine.
Maybe this doesn’t help parents of kids of are later than the stupid milestone charts, but maybe it helps others, or at least shows that the charts are really just an averaging kind of thing, not particularly meaningful at all.
crawled: 10 months
walked: 14 months
sentences: 16 months.
My daughter knew all letters by sight at 16 months. Colors, too. She’s now 3, and says things like, “Neither this crayon nor that crayon are sharp — what shame.” And she’s starting to read — both print and cursive.
The thing is, it’s HARD. Because other parents look at you like you’re some kind of threat, or braggart, or liar. They want you to share the usual stats, but when you give them? Total judgment. And frankly, I don’t really care that she’s apparently pretty bright with language. I’m more seeing it as a huge challenge for me to keep her interested and excited about learning. She’ll need special education, I think — in that the “average” curriculum might not give her what she needs.
Meanwhile, she can’t throw a ball and only recently figured out her tricycle. And the potty training has been a NIGHTMARE.
My daughter Maci was talking in full sentences around the same time as Archer (a little over 3), and she’s 4 and 1/2 now and is talking just fine.
As for the crawling & walking, I know that she started crawling at 6 months, and then she walked at 14 which felt like quite a large gap.
Son #1
crawled: 5 months
walked regularly: 1 yr
spoke in sentences: not yet at 2 1/2
(speech therapy eval scheduled for this week)
Son #2 (same age as Fable)
crawled: 8 months
walked regularly: at 17 months can walk, but still prefers to crawl most of the time.
spoke in sentences: not unless you consider “No.” a sentence. Has about 7 words.
My oldest girl started to crawl at 11 mo and then walked at 14 mo, although she preferred either my husband or I to help her by holding her hands as she walked. My youngest started to crawl at 9 mo and walked at 12 mo. She was chasing her big sister.
I don’t really know if we were early or what, but I do know that kids have their own clock and when they are ready, they are. It’s the same with everything, learning, reading, math skills. they all have different clocks. I try not to compare with everyone else. That’s always a way to get down on yourself for not doing it right.
You are a wonderful mother. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks. Your kids are perfect just the way they are. They will do everything according to their own clock anyway.
I love this topic! As a self professed Type A, i will willingly admit that the best (and most terrifying) thing to happen to me as a parent was to be a first time parent of twins. I just know that I would have obsessed and worried needlessly over a single baby – but as the mom of two happy, normal, healthy 19 month girls I learned early on not to compare. Not to compare to friends children, and most definitely not to compare to each other. (But, fellow moms, you know how difficult this actually is!!! It’s a favorite topic amongst anyone who speaks to you – like ever! Truth be told, i even have to mentally slap myself every now and then when I find myself going down that slippery mental slope with my little ladies. – the the comparisons started in utero with several scary Level 2 ultrasounds…)
Amabelle (Bella) was born two lbs. heavier then her twin and to date has maintained this exact weight difference at nearly every single doctor appointment. She is a patient girl with huge blue eyes, blond ringlets and a peaceful inner calm. She was more then content to lay on her back, rather then roll, roll rather then crawl, and crawl rather then walk… But when she decided to do each of these things, she did them almost overnight, with no prelude. Her first sounds included dragon-like gutteral growls which were in direct contrast to her dainty feminine sneeze. She can solve puzzles, sort things by colors, and will listen to story after story and seems to laugh at plots and concepts that should be far beyond her young grasp.
My Emma (Emmaline) is a tiny dynamo… seeming to make up for her height and weight difference by attempting to do things far before she is physically ready. Today she walked up the steps – which was funny as she needed to lift her leg nearly to shoulder height to do so. In nearly every physical achievement Emma was 1-2 months ahead of her sister, but where Belle seemed to calmly decide to roll, Emma fought and earned every movement. As I read to Emma she quickly fills in all the words she knows, rushing to turn to the next page. Where Belle sorts colors, Emma says them – but will throw a puzzle within seconds of attempting it. She is a fiery pixie, with tiny features, a warm grey eye, and a fringe of dark hair. Emma ran within days of walking, and started kicking a ball and throwing it as soon as she could wrap her tiny hands around it.
What amazes me most about their differences is how completely normal each of their achievements are. They learn from us, they learn from each other… but most of all, they learn from themselves. Isn’t it amazing that they seem to conquer so many tasks the very second your back is turned?! I had to learn, early on, to let each of my daughters be themselves. I’m pretty sure I’m just along for the ride anyway! I wonder if at some point they will put me in the normal category… or if, as I suspect (since I just found out I am expecting twins again this summer – and having 4 children under the age of two can’t be good for anyones sanity) they may find me a bit behind in a milestone or two.
You know Rebecca, my son has a pretty significant speech delay. He will be 4 in June and still isn’t really making sentences. His vocabulary is made up of about 250 words… practically all nouns. He was in the average range for most of his other milestones… but he’s just never started talking. (His hearing has been checked extensively).
The thing is, I just don’t worry about it. Of course we have been proactive in helping him with language. He is in a special preschool program that we all love, him especially. And we read together; I take the time to listen when he does talk; and we play word games. But, at the end of the day I know he is a bright kid who just happens to be on a different trajectory than a lot of his peers.
I have been reading GGC for years (Isn’t that crazy? How time flies.) And I was always so comforted and reassured by what you wrote about Archer. We too have gone through the questions about “The Spectrum” and all that jazz. But, Normy isn’t challenged like that, he’s just his own brand of special. I wouldn’t trade him for anything. And I can’t wait to hear what will inevitably come out of his mouth. I’ll wait as long as it takes. Patiently.
I first of all wanted to thank you for this post, and for the response you made … I don’t know a couple of weeks? back to my comment on Momversation. I got out the baby book for this one.
Sarah began crawling at 9 months, but didn’t get really good at it until 10 months.
Stood in her crib: 10/11 months old
Walked with assistance 13 months
Walked independently 16 months
Started Running shortly after she started walking (and usually running INTO things).
Speech… ah speech. Well, Sarah babbled, she did. She started somewhere around the 5 month mark. Somewhere before her first birthday, most of her babbles became “hums”, she no longer opens her mouth unless she’s pissed off and then only rarely. She has what sound like entire conversations, makes animal sounds… with her mouth shut. She’s extremely tactile defensive around her mouth specifically but around other areas as well. And frankly, if we knew she understood us, I wouldn’t be nearly as worried. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
At 15 months old her pediatrician said is Sarah doing ___, ____, ___ . (insert milestone here) And we said no, maybe, sometimes, no, no, well maybe. And she said are you concerned? We to be honest weren’t because she’d been later on a lot of things, but she’d DONE them. Long story short, pediatrician suggested we have her evaluated for EI. Now, I happen to have relatives in the field. Originally they were surprised and said wait a little while, but if you want to do it right away, we’ll set you up. We waited 2 weeks.
As the result of that evaluation, Sarah receives Speech & Feeding Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Special Education Teacher at home… Special Education Class 5x per week and Physical Therapy.
Six months later, we’re seeing some progress… she’s signing more, give me, music, eat.. using a picture schedule, actually turning to her name more, actually playing WITH toys sometimes. And I just really hope it progresses.
I have a son who was born several months premature, but is doing better than some full term children his age. So basically the only thing I can says about it is as long as everything else seems to be progressing normally ( for her) then don’t worry about it. I mean, you can consult a pediatric physical therapist or developmental specialist who will tell you about the same thing, at least that’s what they all tell me. But they can give you some ideas of how to encourage her to move to the next step (literally and figuratively). But the biggest thing I’ve learned is that no kid will develop faster than they are ready to. So kick back and relax and someday these pictures will really make you smile. By the way, she is adorable!
My beautiful parrot baby, who repeats everything back, and has 40+ actual functional words at fourteen months, has yet to crawl, walk, or stand unaided for over three seconds (but, oh, is she beamingly proud of those seconds). And I know it’s normal, and really, I was expecting her to be like this from the womb, I, who didn’t walk until 18 months (and was not too physical, ever). I knew she’d be wordsmart and not too brawny, like I knew she’d be a she. So why am I still secretly ashamed every time a kindly stranger asks if I have to run after her? Why do I answer “lots of kids go straight to walking”, trying to make her sound “advanced” for not even trying to crawl?
Thank you so much for the post (and everyone, for your stories). I need to get over the schedule and just get with her smile.
I find it ironic how these comments have devolved into a competition in and of itself of parents showcasing when their children did this or that. Lame.
I was going to mention that I remembered your concern about Archer starting to speak late… I think we are all much more worried with the first child. I don’t even remember much about the milestones with my second. Gosh, I don’t even really remember the dates with my first son! Actually, my youngest took his first steps across a room a week before he turned 1. I wouldn’t have cared if it took him many more months… at the end of the day… it does not matter at all. They’ll get there in their own sweet little time!
My parenting mantra is: This, too, shall pass. It’s seem us through a lot.
Sam – almost 5
Crawled – 14-15 months
Walked – 18 months
Talked – 6 months, complete sentences before his first birthday
Lydia – 18 months
Crawled – 7 months
Walked – 11 months
Talked – ummm, we’re working on it. She can say quite a number of words; whether she chooses to is a different conversation altogether.
My daughter turned 17 months on March 1st and she just started walking about 3 weeks ago. She didn’t crawl until about 14 months. Up until then she did this funny little “army crawl” on her belly. She still isn’t talking. She’ll say Mamamamama when she’s upset, but that’s about it. But I know she understands some things. If I say “Kara, point to your nose.” She’ll touch her nose.
Twin daughters 4 years old now (they reached all their milestones within days of each other):
Crawled: 8 months
Knee walked: 11 months (they were big fans just like Fable)
Walked across the room: 13 months
First word: 19 months (not a day earlier)
Talked in sentences: 24 months
I realized that it doesn’t matter at all when kids hit their milestones, by the time they’re 3 everything evens out. It’s not like the kid that walked at 6 months is a better walker at the age of three than the kid who didn’t walk until he was almost 2. Same with talking – my girls speak just as clearly as their peers even though a lot of them spoke 100 words before my girls even said one.
Average range for walking is 10 – 18 months. 18 month olds average about 50 single words in their vocab, and speaking in 2-word phrases is expected by 24 months, probably needs to be looked at if not happening by 30 months. By age 5, kids have something 3,000 words in their vocab. Pretty astonishing!
There is a wide range of normal. The milestone info is based on real knowledge (medical, developmental, etc.). People who work with kids use the “average range” as a guideline for referring kids who might be delayed. Parents who are confident that their kids are fine don’t have to follow up on referrals. For parents who aren’t sure, it’s helpful to know when an evaluation and/or intervention would be a good idea. But it’s always totally up to the parents whether they want to go that route.
Normal is an illusion.
As a first time mother of a 14 month old who just now is expressing slight interest in standing on her own, I live for posts like this. At this point, Lisel is pretty much the only child her age whose not at least trying to walk. Even the year old kids seem interested.
But not Lisel. She’s was a late crawler, and now, I suppose, she’ll be a late walker. And though I really, really, really, really want to be the cool mom whose totally not into lame competimom stuff like milestones, I can’t deny that sometimes I get a little…you know, uncool,
I found myself at a playdate the other day bemoaning her lack of self motivation in walking. My friend had a very “whatevs” reaction, and I suddenly realized I had become that mom. The mom that seems slightly embarrassed that her child is not kicking all the other kids’ developmental butts.
And I don’t want to be that mom. Because we’re only 14 months into this. It’s time to nip the comparison based pride in the bud.
So when I read your posts about Archer and Fable, it sets my mind at ease, and helps me reset my thinking. Because it’s not about having the best, most intelligent, most developmentally developed kid. It’s about seeing your child for who she is and loving every bit of her.
So thanks for sharing and reminding.
I’m with nic@mybottlesup (wayyyy up in the comments). Don’t worry about comparing Archer and Fable to anyone (or each other)! Just enjoy. She’s beautiful, a problem solver, can talk, and has shown the ability to walk. It will all come in time. But, oy!, my knees hurt thinking about her solution to mobility!
For the record, my son crawled at about 10 months, walked at 13 months. Sentences? Can’t remember…but he’s got a great vocabulary now. He’s eleven. Love your site–love your honesty.
I LOVE that you opened this up. For two big reasons: (1) as a developmental psychologists, I’m constantly having to tell parents how variable these “average” milestone markers are — they’re useful for kids way, WAAAAAAY off the mark (to get some help if needed), but not for much else… except inducing panic attacks and (2) I have fraternal twin boys. All you need is to have fraternal twins and you get a real sense of how messed up these milestones can be. Case in point:
Twin A:
Crawled: 8 months
Walked: 15 months
Full sentences: 18 months
Twin B:
Crawled: 11 months (and I’m convinced it was only because his brother was pissing him off with all the shuffling around him and taking his stuff; he probably would have skipped the whole thing if he could have)
Walked: 15 months
Full sentences: 24 months
NOW? They’re four and entirely equal in terms of their verbal abilities. Neither can read, one is intensely interested in learning the other could care less. They are also both perfect geniuses, of course;-)
I’m not a mom, so I rarely post on the mom board, but I had to comment today.
One of my best friends didn’t walk until 15 months. Today, she’s getting paid to get her doctorate at a top research university in her field. This is after graduating with a 4.0 (one of only 20 out of 5000+) from the best college in our state.
Milestones don’t matter in the long run (no pun intended).
I have a one year old boy who just had his 12 month old check up. According to his pediatrician he is way above average in all skills (fine motor, communication, social, problem solving) except gross motor. He is just now starting to do the army crawl and he moves faster everyday. For months now he has just been rolling around to get to whatever it was that he wanted. He will support himself when standing against something (furniture, wall, etc) and he will walk when you hold his hands or waist.
His doctor describes two kinds of babies: athletic babies and boss babies. My little one is clearly a “boss baby”, meaning he is really good at communicating in order to get what he wants or needs and easily making himself happy with what is immediately around him. Athletic babies are less interested in talking and playing with more intricate toys and want to mostly move, move, move.
Since it seemed that he was a visual learner, and he is an only child, I set him up in childcare three days a week to get him around some children his age who move. So far it’s working. Today he was even attempting to pull himself up for the first time.
I do have to say that since about eight months old I would have one day where I would be worried sick that he would never move and the next I was convinced he is developing normally. I still have those days where I freak out a little, BUT between reading things like this, and talking to the doctor, those days are far less frequent.
Vincent (22 months)
Army crawled @ 7 months
Crawled for reals @ 9 1/2 months
Walked @ 15 1/2 months
Does not speak in sentences at all. I don’t really know how many words he has, not that much I guess, typically stuff, and he can mimick me when I say a word sometimes. I started to kinda worry about it, but he understands EVERYTHING. I mean, he does everything on command, like throw his diaper away, grab a specific book, knows when daddy is home, gives hugs and kisses, so I know he is totally smart. He is a whiz at everything he does, he’s very mechnical, great at puzzles, so I know that one day he’ll just start talking when he’s ready. Just like he did w/ the walking. Not a single step until one day he just stood up and walked 15 steps and then within weeks he was practically running. I see early walkers (10 months or so) and they took months to get where Vincent got in two weeks. I think he is patient and starts doing things instantly with no practice.
I was reading one of the earlier comments that said “Can’t remember…but he’s got a great vocabulary now. He’s eleven.” I think this says it all – by the time they are 11 these milestones will be the furthest thing from our minds. Just fun little memories about the quirkiness of our kids.
Because you asked:
My oldest son, who is 4, crawled at 10 months, walked at 13 months and spoke in full sentences just past his second birthday.
My youngest is 18 months and he crawled at 11 months, walked at 15 months and has about 50 words but babbles non-stop.
I figure if there is something to worry about, mother’s intuition will kick in.
Rebecca,
My son didn’t walk until he was almost 17 months old and is now 2.5 and isn’t really talking either.
As a parent I have a very low key attitude towards his development…but had my feelings seriously hurt the other day when someone told me they felt he was delayed.
Ugh. That word hit me in the chest so hard.
And you are right, as parents we stress on these developmental milestones so hard.
At this point I’m just going to keep a good attitude and keep encouraging J to talk in a gentle way.
All good things will come in time.
My daughter has hit the milestones the doctor asks about just fine but at 15 months she still really really very strongly prefers baby food to table food. The closest she comes to eating table food is pudding and applesauce – it doesn’t get much closer to baby food than that.
Thank you for giving me permission to stop fretting over it. Heaven knows she’ll be eating table food for most of her life in the end.
I’ve tried really hard not to post this, but I have to say something. It’s pretty much the same thing I said on the head size post.
There is a wide range of normal, but there is also a wide range of abnormal. The reason that normal ranges are defined is because sometimes – not always, not usually, but sometimes – being having “abnormal” milestones or size or whatever is an indication that there is some underlying problem that should be looked at, and that early intervention can greatly improve the outlook for.
You need to have a great ped for your kid that you trust, and you both need to work together to determine when a delay may be a problem and when it isn’t. A parent can’t do it alone, and neither can a doctor. Some parents are way too reactionary, some not reactionary enough. The same can be said for doctors. You need to find a ped that balances you well.
Anyway, Eddie:
Rolled over at 6.5 months
Sat up at 8.5 months
Crawled at 11.5 months
Walked at 21.5 months
First word around 11 months
Is currently 26 months and kind of sort of talks in sentences sometimes
His gross motor skills were only slightly delayed (except for walking – that one was pretty delayed), but they were consistently delayed. Fine motor skills were the same. He has always been really small, but hey, lots of kids are small, right?
I first raised concerns when he wasn’t rolling over at 6 months, our doc said let’s wait. At 8 months, when he wasn’t sitting, we went in for a physical therapy eval. When he wasn’t pulling to stand at 13 months, we were sent to the neurologist. I don’t feel like we RUSHED into any of this, but I’m glad we did look in to things, as he was eventually diagnosed with a genetic condition and early intervention will give him the best chance of success.
Thanks for balancing the conversation, Em! (Full disclosure: Em is my sister-in-law and the adorable Eddie is my nephew)
Why it all matters is because EARLY INTERVENTION will make a difference for Eddie.
So yeah, try not to freak out about one thing (shoot, my #2 still never rolls over at 8 months, but now that he’s sitting I know that it’s just because he’s lazy. I mean “content”). But communicate with your doctor. Trust your instincts.
a little late to the game here but for what it’s worth…
my own new babe is only 2.5 months so, you know, she’s not doing much of anything yet. but i didn’t walk until i was 2 years old, and was able to crawl prior but didn’t do much of that either… i guess i was just really lazy. i didn’t knee-walk like fable or creep or any of that. i waited, in fact, until my mother got scared enough to take me to the doctor to see if i was okay. the doc advised her to wait and i, little stinker, hopped off the couch and walked across the room that very day. i was talking in complete sentences really early, and learned to read pretty early from what my mom says, but all the physical stuff? i was way behind. i didn’t figure out how to ride a bike until i was almost 10. my sister on the other hand, skipped crawling altogether and was not just walking but running and climbing out of her crib by her first birthday. every kid is different and “normal” is so vague as to basically mean nothing.
as to the post above… my daughter was born 5 weeks early and we were instructed to have the early intervention people come in for an evaluation to make sure she was developing properly. the idea of this scared the bejeezus out of me. fortunately she seems to be doing fine (inasmuch as you can tell that sort of thing in a child so young)… but the week before those people showed up i was a nervous wreck, even though i spend 24 hours a day with this child and i know she’s progressing and doing all the things she “should”. trust your instincts (says the brand-new mommy to the well seasoned mother-of-two
!
Caleb crawled at 11.5 months, walked at 14.5 months, didn’t speak a single word until 2, stringing words together closer to 3
Eli crawled at 9 months, walked on his first birthday and talking in sentences before his second b-day. He is 2 1/2 now and never. shuts. up.
my nephew is 18 months old, not talking yet, crawled around 13 months and started walking about 16.5 months old.
omg. ha, when i saw this i knew i had to write something! my daughter (which is now 22 months) “knee-walked” until she was 15 months, and until now i have never seen another child do this. my poor baby would get rug burn on her knees so i had to keep stockings on her all summer! your little fable find the courage to walk someday soon!
I work at a daycare, with all ages of children. Before I started this job, I was completely clueless on what the “milestones” were really expected to me. I had worked with autistic children exclusively, where milestones were all over the place, so I wasn’t even sure how a typical child was supposed to develop.
Working at the daycare has been wonderful, and I’ve learned a lot of new things. For instance, the infants are moved into the “One’s” classroom when they turn one, because, well, basically they can walk. Or they are supposed to be able to. In our classroom of 12 one year old’s, only 1 doesn’t walk. He is about a year and a half and he shows no desire whatsoever to walk at all. He has to be carried everywhere, which is very difficult when running after 11 other babies.
But, like you and everyone else is saying, it happens at different times for everyone, but the average is an average for a reason, right? There’s always going to be kids that walk sooner or later than others.