Keeping Archer’s Marbles Away From Fable’s Mouth
Today I caught Archer playing with his marbles at Fable’s feet as she grasped for them with her chubby little hands. In .05 seconds I leapt on Archer, tackling him to the ground.
“I told you not to play with your marbles anywhere even close to Fable’s vicinity!”
“Because Fable could choke on the marbles and die, right Mommy?”
“Um… What?”
“Because Fable could swallow a marble and it would choke and die and then it wouldn’t be very nice at all.”
“Um… Yes? Yes. So… Please don’t do that anymore.”
“Yeah. Because it’s NOT NICE!”
Archer spent the rest of the afternoon playing marbles on the other side of the living room as Fable kicked her little legs against her bouncy seat. But it got me thinking, wondering what I’m going to do when Fable is old enough to crawl. I never childproofed the house when Archer was a baby because I didn’t really need to. Because he didn’t really care to try to get into anything and plus, nothing of mine was really of interest. Nothing besides my shoes and tampons (great toy, very useful) and it wasn’t like he was going to choke on those. Fable on the other hand is a second child and second children, I’m finding, want nothing more than to get all up in their big brothers’ bidnis.
Hooray for Archer’s stuff! And while we’re at it, hooray for tea parties! And leg warmers! And cute headbands and flowers and wonderfulness!
“At some point you’re probably going to have to take away Archer’s marbles,” my mom said to me months ago, during a mother/daughter marble shopping-spree. (It’s amazing how HARD it is to find marbles these days and how easy it is to find dolls that talk. So backwards and lame.)
“Yeah. I’ll just take them away when she’s crawling and stuff,” I agreed and left it at that.
Taking away Archer’s marbles seemed like a perfectly logical, obvious sollution until Archer’s marbles became his greatest love and now I’m fucked. Because how the hell can I take away my darling son’s greatest love? I mean… I can’t. Can I?
It’s true Fable’s far from crawling but she does this thing where she kind of half pounces, half crashes her face into the floor and onto various objects of her affection so even though she’s immobile she’s still pretty damn effective in her reach. Especially when it comes to Archer and his toys.
I’m gonna get you, sucka.
So here’s the stitches, bitches. I have a baby who likes grabbing for Archer’s stuff and an Archer whose stuff happens to be mainly of the marble variety these days. This is a situation that is new to me as a relatively new mother of two. It’s quite easy to keep one child away from dangerous objects in that you just move them out of reach. Quite another when you have older brothers with small parts all over the floor and in all reachable places all day long.
So what to do? Small house. Babes share a bedroom. Kid’s favorite toys are small, round, glass beads perfect for swallowing. Baby loves grabbing Archer’s stuff and putting everything in her mouth.
Hm… Not ideal.
P.S. I think I’m beginning to realize why it’s so impossible to find marbles in local toy and drug stores these days. Fewer dilemmas in the sibling/safety department. Smart thinking, Rite Aid.
***
My second was the same as Fable. I only let the older one play with his ramps and marbles when I could pay really close attention to the baby. It was hard on the older one at first but they soon got used to it and found that you could make ramps for bigger balls (not gigantic but big enough that the baby wouldn’t choke and could play too).
maybe get him a special marble table? one that fable cant reach. something with crevacis (sp?) and grooves or compartments so they dont roll off desk. and tell him he can only play with them there.
My youngest can’t get enough of his big bro’s stuff either. He refuses to play with baby toys most of the time, actually, because it’s more fun to torture his brother than to play with another stupid Elmo toy. The rule around here when the baby got mobile was that my 4yo just couldn’t play with any chokable toys when the baby was awake. So things like “Who Spilled the Beans” and other games and toys with little pieces got put up until the baby was napping or went to be at night (earlier than my 4yo). That worked pretty well for us, but it didn’t involve anything he was absolutely in love with as Archer seems to be with marbles, so not sure if it’ll work for you.
I agree with Daisy – tell Archer that he can have 1/2 an hour or an hour a day to play while you keep extra close tabs on the baby. I’ve got a 5 year old, 3 year old and 10 month old. No matter how many times I tell them that they need to be careful of small things on the floor, every day I find things they have dropped that could choke the little one. It’s a constant battle.
Fable’s nap time = Marble time. Pretty simple for him to understand, I would think, and would also keep him occupied so you could relax. He’s a pretty smart kid.
BTW, you are very lucky. I only have one and had to baby-proof like Fort Knox. She is amazingly adept at getting into everything, and damned determined, too.
Ah, if only Fable would nap. I like the 30 minute idea. Kind of like how he gets to watch “his show” for 30 minutes in the evening. He gets to play “his marbles” in the same way. “Marble time! Okay, time to give Mommy your 78739287984 marbles back, now!”
That was just me practicing.
My older one liked his airport with airplanes and tons of tiny chock-able leaded plastic extras. For about 6 months, he played with it on queen bed (with old upside down table top as stable surface). By the time the little one could move stools and climb up (last week), the little one stopped putting everything in his mouth- although this morning we had a very loud ‘discussion’ about toothpaste tops.
Marbles is harder since you need more space. Back yard?
I have a high-up container in the play area where I dump in little chockables when I come across them. I have no idea why I still come across them every other day. I have this horrible feeling that the average-70-toys-a-year for-typical american kids might be an underestimate. And we’re super stingy!
I like the marble-table idea – would that work for you guys?
my baby (9 mo, crawling) won’t really nap unassisted either, so my 4.5 yr old boy just can’t play with tiny stuff when she’s around. He’s not happy about it, but she won’t be all orally-fixated forever. Let him keep some in his pocket or something.
My son collects filthy rusty gross bottlecaps, and tries leaving them all over the house. I toss them. he also can play with that choky stuff in his room, but I can’t play with him when she’s around. Just how it is.
oh, lots of time outside Everyone’s happy there.
Marble Table would be awesome. (I kind of made a mock-up one out of a lego container.) I’m afraid we don’t really have room for something bigger. Ugh. And outside is for sure our favorite place to be. Need to draw some chalk circles on the front sidewalk, show Archer how to PLAY marbles. Make it an outdoor activity, perhaps.
Oh man, marbles are so old school! I can see how you wouldn’t want to dissuade that–maybe make them a strictly playground thing? That way sissy can be in her swing or stroller, far away from the death balls:)
Sorry that sounds tricky! I was crazy for lincoln logs. Maybe see if he is into them? So fun, and not chokable.
Ah, love me some Lincoln Logs. My (step) great grandfather actually invented them! No lie!
I bragged about that for YEARS by the way. Apparently I never stopped. (Lincoln Logs were my favorite toy as a kid, too. I used to build log cabins for all my little animal figurines. Ah… the good life.)
In our house, my older son can only play with his small toys when the little one is busy with something else or asleep. We found that saying, “Dante will LOSE them” was far more effective than saying he`d choke. Little kids aren`t really that firm on the idea of death and stuff, but they sure as heck know how awful it is to lose a favorite toy!
I have just the one little babe, but she seems to find every little thing and it goes right in her mouth! her dad loves to fish and has tons of tiny hooks, weights, lures, etc. lying around. You would think an adult would be better about keeping things like that put away, yea, not so much.
As for Archer’s marbles, they make mats to play on. This may make it easier for him to play marbles anywhere and the mats fold up and away. If you google marbles there are online stores that sell them as well as pouches and things to keep them contained.
http://www.moonmarble.com/p-928-knuckle-down-marble-mat.aspx
Fables outfits are just awesome. She is one hip chic.
I have the same problem, only with 2 girls. The oldest leaves her teeny tiny barbie shoes all over the place and I’m always after her to get them off the floor. What makes it tough is that they share a room, so the “little stuff” can’t be quarantined to just her room.
I know exactly what you mean about not baby proofing for the first one! Back in the day, all I had to do was make sure that she wouldn’t choke on the dog food. It’s amazing how different having 2 kids is!
I’m a mom of two- both boys- 3 1/2 and 1 year old. I have the same problem. I actually used a large play gate to “corral” my older son and toys with little pieces- this way he sees it as his special place area and my younger son still has a larger space to crawl- and now walk- around with his toys mostly hazard free.
I had 4 kids under the age of 8. Yes, it’s miserable for the older as we had lego-mania on our hands for years. So, we did the babygate thing and it saved my sanity. My oldest was allowed to put up the gate in his room (even though he shared it) and the babies were locked out with Mom and he was able to happily listen to his rock-n-roll on his radio and build to his heart’s content.
Funny thing, my baby girls would happily sit outside the gate and watch their big brother play for long periods at a time. It didn’t hurt their feelings.. they enjoyed it. Sort of like the zoo! I have a picture of them both laying, with their blankies, in the hallway getting their music fix and watching their brother build. They fell sound asleep, happy in their uncaged slumber, sanity all around.
Oh yeah… hands down, Legos and Hot Wheels are the worst things to step on in the middle of the night. They win over barbie shoes, littlest pet shop bobble heads, and hair barrettes. Just sayin…
I didn’t even get through the first sentence before I busted out laughing. Not bc your baby girl could have choked but bc I have a 3yr old boy and a 9mo old little girl. My son Taegan’s new obsession is “Narbles” (also known as marbles…people who correct their child’s mispronunciations are no fun.) Anyway, my daughter Lilah-Grace is crawling and into EVERYTHING. Its so funny to hear someone with the SAME story as me! We never really babyproofed with our son. No need. I was always with him! So my solution…For a while he played them only on his train table, but once Lilah-Grace could pull up that was useless. So, I keep the marbles and he has to ask to play with them. Usually during his sisters naptime. PS I am a young mom trying to start my own business (www.shoplilliebee.com) and thinking about starting my own blog. I just found yours and LOVE IT! Can’t wait to read more…thanks!
so… totally bizarre. but i know an older lady named Gerry who has a familial relation to john lloyd wright too. i believe its granddaughter. is that possible? are you related?
Maybe Archer just accidentally loses a marble or two a week for awhile. I mean, a marble here, a marble there, those suckers are small and round and easy to lose. Just sayin’. And maybe as his supply dwindles, a new and exciting toy comes into the home and distracts him.
Also, I think we need a moment to say HOORAY for cute babies! ACK! The cuteness is killing me!
I agree with teaching Archer how to play marbles outside — not only is it old-school but it’s easier to keep the Fabey-baby away from him. Everyone wins!
And you’re kinda lucky — not only did they put things in their mouth, but my girls used to stick things up their NOSES. Lego blocks, peas, balls of play-dough, all went up their nostrils for reasons I’ve never understood even when they were old enough to know better (like, five and six years old). Imagine, if you will, holding your hysterical, screaming child’s head, cupping your other hand under their nose, and telling them to snort out as hard as they can. Oy.
I would have marbles be for a certain time and/or a certain place. Like he can play with marbles at the park but not at home, or he can have marble time in the afternoon while you and Fable lay down for half an hour. Something like that. And of course remember that by the time she is crawling he might have a new favorite thing!
Oh, and your daughter is ADORABLE, by the way. She has nicer clothes than I do! What a chic little baby. She makes me want another kid. Like, now. Ha.
Thankfully my little man is still completely enthralled by building ramps for his cars. OH and he’s totally in to puzzles, which I love. I would think Lincoln Logs would be a huge hit as well. Isn’t it crazy how different things are when you have two?
P.S. Your Fable is just about the cutest baby girl around.
What about getting one of those table trays and having him play with them in there? He could play on top of a table, that she can’t quite reach. And the tray would prevent them from going off the table.
Maybe “marble time” could be something special that he can only do at his grandparents house. My Bubbie always had great things planned for us that my mother would NEVER have let us do!
No advice here, but my mom always says that 2nd (3rd, 4th, etc) children are always alot heartier than the 1st since there are so many little things – like marbles – that are around the house for them to get into.
Fable is an absolute doll!
I smile whenever I see pictures of her.
I have no kids and therefore no tips, other than that it seems like pretty soon you’ll have enough amazing material for *another* new book – a book of photographs. Everything you put up looks so great.
Marbles, huh? Those are even harder to keep track of the LEGO “guys” my son would play with. I empathize. I would keep them in a special only-you-are-able-to-open container except when you give them to him to play with. I would count how many you give to him at a time so you will know if one is lost (that would mean only giving him “some” at a time, I guess). I think the marble mat is a great idea to help keep them from rolling all over.
I used to have some gorgeous handblown marbles. So beautiful. They would blow his mind.
I am the parent of three and also do day care, so I spend all day dealing with issues of how to let the older ones play with “big kid” toys while keeping the younger ones safe.
Often when the big kids want to play Legos (or even Play-Doh or puzzles, something not necessarily chokey but that we don’t want the baby getting ineo), we set them up at the dining room table. There’s enough space there to play, and my 13-month-old can’t reach up there. With some kind of tray (I’m actually picturing the top of a storage bin, turned upside down, so the lip points up), you could ensure that they don’t roll off.
Good luck. In my experience (so far), it never really ends!
Do Archer and Fable share a room? Maybe he could only play his marbles in his bedroom. That’s where hotwheels and Thomas the Trains are being banished when my daugher gets old enough to crawl!
When my oldest was 2 1/2 and my new angel came into our lives, I learned child CPR and hoped for the best. She’ll turn two in August…so it seems to be working
Tell Archer that the marbles have a new home and that your house has a new rule: he can only play with marbles inside a medium sized suitcase, which they’ll inhabit from now until forever or until Fable’s big enough to play too, whichever happens first. That way, they’re all concentrated in a single area. He can roll them around inside, pack them up easily, haul them from one place to another and store them away easily – just that all playing is now confined to inside the surface of a large, zipable (surely that’s a word)suitcase. He can put them in all the different compartments and use the “floor” of it to arrange them.
It’s easier to see a baby headed for a giant suitcase in the middle of the floor than for a teeny tiny marble you might have known was there.
I am both a mean and an alarmist mommy and would take those marbles away until they would not be choking hazards for anyone in the house. And fast. You do not want to be on the other side of this if it goes down wrong. Offer another toy that is safe for all to get their hands on. I did like the idea about only playing with them at Bubbe’s house, but if your folks are like mine, there will be leftover marbles under the couch and they will dangerously lurk there forever. Bottom line is that they are dangerous and no matter how closely we think we’re watching our kids, it just takes a second for them to pop dog kibble or marbles into their mouths. If you’re cutting up grapes and hot dogs, and not serving popcorn or raisins, all in the hopes of avoiding choking hazards for babies, you need to get those marbles put away and now.
And if you feel like putting money into it, Archer could pick the suitcase from a store and then he’d be more inclined to use it… Otherwise, just any old suitcase that Archer can lug around would do.
Oh, serious flashbacks here. My oldest son ate a marble and pooped it out the next day. We were so lucky he didn’t choke.
I hope you never need to use it, but as a mom of four I would suggest taking a baby cpr class….I know it’s a dreadful thought, however I’ve found that no matter how much I try to implement “chokable toy” strategies, it’s still almost impossible to avoid the occasional wayward Lego. I know, it’s a depressing reality!
Legos were a huge issue for us – I don’t even know how I handled it! I like the idea of Fable’s nap time = marble time
Had Fable come before Archer, this post would have come soooo much sooner! My youngest is a boy and he has been trying to put anything and everything in his mouth since, like, day 12. And the extra special part? His big sister likes to help. Not that she’s trying to off him or anything, it was just sort of a game for awhile. Sort of like “Can Baby Brother fit this in his mouth? Can he swallow it? Can he swallow it before mom sees?” Luckily, she has always been a rather bright child, so I asked her one day if she liked her brother. She said yes, so I asked her if she loved him. Again, she said yes. Then I asked her if she would like to be able to really play with him one day when he was a big boy. She got really excited at this idea, so I told her that if he kept putting things in his mouth he might not ever get that big. It wasn’t threatening or anything like that, just a factual sort of conversation. She totally got it, and started picking up her toys and being strangely responsible for a two-year-old.
Of course, now that she’s six and he’s four, she’s having second thoughts about being so careful with him when he was a baby…
Here’s something that worked for my mom with me and my little brother. There were areas where certain small toys HAD to stay, no matter what. Pick a room Fable never goes into, say, Archer’s room. (I don’t know if they share??) Those small toys HAVE to stay in there. They absolutely cannot leave that room, and he can do whatever he wants while he’s in there. If you want him to be playing outside, you give him permission to bring the marbles out of the room when you know you can watch Fable. The second you find a marble outside of that space when he didn’t ask for permission,all the marbles get confiscated for a couple days. I can almost guarantee that it takes about one time of following through with the threat before he can completely self police the situation himself. And my brother didn’t choke once!
Oh wait. I just read back and saw they share a room. Oops. Well, if there’s any other space that Fable won’t have random access to whenever she pleases, that works too.
we’ve had similar issues in our house. a couple times i bribed my oldest to give up the choking hazard and other times they’ve just disappeared in the night. good parenting advice? probably not. but it’s worked for us so far.
Well: maybe you could let Archer keep his marbles. You can make him a little corner where he can play with them and then put a round gate around him so that even when Fable starts crawling she can’t get to him. And just make it a rule that WHENEVER he wants to play with marbles or any other dangerous toy for Fable that he HAS to play with them in that designated corner, or else no marbles! Also of course: you still have to be on the look out in case a marble rolls out of the gate. Just a thought anyhow.
And yeah marbles are very hard to find for that reason, they’re just too dangerous. I’m surprised they haven’t banned them altogether; though in a way since it’s so hard to find they kind of have. Come to think of it I haven’t seen a pack of marbles in forever!
Ah, this reminds me of my two girls years ago except the culprit was the small Legos instead of marbles. My oldest loved her Lego and so did my little one–but more in a “what a great snack to tie me over until sweet potato and strained blueberry time” kinda way.
As has been suggested, I used to let my oldest have her “Lego” time during moments when I could closely watch my youngest. Baby play time, feedings, naps, bath time. It takes some juggling but I think it teaches the oldest that their interests are still important while at the same time teaching a bit of responsibility that they need to help “watch out for baby’s safety”.
Best of luck at not loosing your marbles over the marbles.
I only have one child, so I am going to offer some advice via my sister.
Her older daughter was always leaving tiny objects on the floor within the baby’s reach. She sat her daughter down and explained to her that she needed her help since she was such a big girl. She asked her daughter if she could “protect the baby.” Her daughter was so excited to get to help with such an important job.
Every time I see or talk to my niece, she tells me how big she is because she gets to protect the baby. She then proceeds to tell me what an important job it is because the baby “could get HURT!” She is totally into it.
Might work with your little man.
yeah….good luck. with legos, playmobil pieces, and on and on….. i ATTEMPTED to make my 3-4 year old keep these toys upstairs & put them in a high spot when he was done. then i had to pick my battles & stop fighting. so i watched the baby. alot. good luck
I just designated areas in the house as baby-free zones. This way my 7 year old knows they are safe areas for her stuff and my 16 month old will never go in there. A couple if spring loaded baby gates that can be moved around have been a great investment. The house seems to stay neater now that the older one knows not to leave her crap (ahem… I mean, super important possessions…) everywhere. Everyone wins! BTW, do you make Fable’s headbands? She looks so fabulous in them.
I have an 11-year-old son and a (tomorrow) 1-year-old son(sobbing for the fastest year ever!)… The small and choke-worthy or poke-worthy things are even worse with a 10-year gap! There are plenty of pencils on the floor… change…rubber bands…a music stand with sharp, jagged edges. Ahhh.. Fun. I can’t even imagine life this time next year. I am expecting now, and I will have a 12-year-old, a 2-year-old and an 8-month-old. Eek. Might as well just live in an empty house…with padded walls.
Ugh. It’s BRUTAL, isn’t it? I’ve been slowly taking marbles away in hopes that Archer won’t notice them disappearing. I have YET to introduce him to the small legos in the house because I knew those would be an issue, too. Archer is super ON IT when it comes to keeping all objects away from her after we explained the importance but once she’s on the move? Screwed. Which is why I’m gathering all advice now so I can make this happen asap. You ladies rock.
And you’re right. I need to take a CPR class — its been years since I’ve done so and could use a brush up.
I am shuddering over here… Marbles freak the fack out of me. My youngest is 3 1/2 and I am FINALLY thinking of letting my boys have marbles in the house. Seriously, I pitch them. They come in the house, they meet my garbage can. My own personal nightmare…
That said, I understand how much he loves them. They’re shiny, they roll, and they’re all different! AWESOME! But… They are reallllly dangerous for Fable.
If you decide to keep them, I’d definitely have a routine where you count how many come out and how many go in. And make it part of the marble game.
Another nightmare fear of mine? Magnetix. Don’t even get me started….
Good luck on this one.
When I was nannying a 3 year old and an 18 month old, the rule was that the 3 year old could play marbles and Polly Pockets (bleeeeh) and other such choking hazards only when the littler one was sleeping or not around. The 3 year old also knew the rule that if a toy or object fit inside a toilet paper tube, it was small enough to choke her sister, so it had to be kept out of reach.
I learned that from the previous nanny who was evil but had 20 years of experience!
Hey Rebecca,
I’ve got a 4 year old who is ‘marble mental’ as well, and I’m expecting our 2nd baba so I share your concerns. BUT I have found a solution… it was borne more out of annoyance of the combination of marbles/child/hardwood floors CLATTERCLATTERCLATTEROMIGOD so we bought him this marble run. It means he only gets to use about 3 marbles at a time, and they’re all inside the game so they’re less accessible. Maybe you could try something like it?
Problem is… I live in the UK and I’m not sure if there’s anything similar there… but here’s the link to it anyway; might be worth trying to find something similar?
http://www.elc.co.uk/toy/extreme-marble-madness-1/
i have 4 children under 7 and each time the youngest has started to crawl, i have told the older one(s) that this or that “work” (polly pockets, legos, marbles, etc) has to be done at the “high table” which is our dining room table. all the interested children can sit around the high table and play with the toy with small parts and baby is safe.
no exceptions: toys with small parts are only played with at the high table.
one thing that helped immensely is a tripp trapp chair for the child who was the smallest, but not the baby (usually a young toddler 18 months to 2). this is a great high chair like chair that toddlers can climb up on their own. they can get up and down at will and their feet rest comfortably on the lower platform. ingenius. this gives the toddler access to the high table and lets them play with the bigger kids while keeping the small toys out of baby’s reach.
i am sure you will figure out your own rhythym and what what works for your family. hth!
I let the older one climb into the play pen to play with that sort of thing. SHe loves climbing in and out and that the baby can’t get her stuff when she’s in there. The baby doesn’t seem to mind b/c she can watch up close and personal thru the netting
Only other thing that I can think of would be to use one of those…how do I describe this…okay, think big rubbermaid tub, now make it shallow and long. The kind you use for storing clothes under the bed if you’re the sort of person (like my mother-in-law) who can be organized enough to do that. Maybe Archer can play with his marbles in the oversized tupperware thing up on a bed or couch where Miss Fable can’t reach them. Then you can put the lid on when he’s done and shove it into a closet when marble time is over. Like a marble table but much much cheaper.