This is week one of Mission: Lose the Baby Weight! Can you feel the excitement? It’s palpable, isn’t it? I know I’m pumped. I’m PUMPED!
All sarcasm aside, the single most annoying part of baby-making is post-birth weight loss. Plain and simple it sucks ass to gain weight for the vast majority of us, even if its “good weight for healthy baby making.” Especially when we know all too well we will have to lose it later. Ugh. Drat.
It too me a good six months to lose the forty plus pounds I needed to lose after Archer’s birth and I did it the old fashioned way: eating salads twice a day and hiking six days a week which I did every single morning until I could fit back into my skinny jeans. And I gotta say, I never looked better than I did that year after Archer was born. I OWNED motherhood, y’all. OWNED.
Of course the ebb and flow is such that eventually motherhood owned me, but in retrospect I am extremely proud of my weight-loss accomplishment the first time around. I *was* younger then which makes a big difference. It does. Not that I’m that much older now but I can already tell that it’s going to be harder for me this time around. My belly may have lost most of its bulge but its very obvious that I’ve carried childREN. The skin around my belly button is perpetually frowning, poor thing.
I also have far less time to focus on weight loss than I did the first time. My original plan was to drop Archer at school and head for the hills to hike with Fable in the BabyHawk every morning..
rockin’ the hawk
…Easier said than done. In one week I have hiked one time, mainly because I’ve been sick all week but also because I have work to do and the only time to do it is in the morning because that is when Fable sleeps. Otherwise I have to work with Fable in my lap, which I can do but it’s not easy. Am I making excuses? Maybe. But I’m also a mother of two who works at home with no help, which is a bit trickier time-wise than it was with one baby. Still, losing weight is very important to me. Mainly because I cannot deal with wearing black every day in effort to slim myself down. I went through my goth phase already and I have no desire to go back thankyouverymuch.
Of course, I have no idea what I currently weigh because I don’t believe in owning a scale, something that was instilled in me by my mother (which I plan to instill in Fable as well) who forbade scales in our house, thus saving my little sister and I from potential eating disorders. I only ever knew what size I wore growing up, of course, unless I stepped into one of my friend’s houses and OMG I weigh 130 pounds? Somebody kill me NOW.
Ugh. I was such an idiot in Highschool. I would literally kill to weigh 130 pounds, now. I don’t think its near possible but I’m certainly trying to get back down to 140. But I digress. Because of the no-scales-in-house rule I can only guesstimate I’m packing a good 15-20 pounds more than I usually weigh and most of it is in my hips, thighs and upper arms so I feel pretty confident that with some work and cutting out sugars and processed foods (best breakfast for losing the lbs? Whole grains boiled and served with soy milk and fruit — try it! You will be full well into the afternoon. Other weight-loss tips include: chewing gum after meals to avoid sweets and brushing teeth after dinner to fend off after-dinner snacking) I can lose it all by next summer. I mean, if I could lose 40 pounds working my ass off for six months, I can probably lose 20 pounds taking it slow, hiking a couple times a week, over an eight-month period, yes?
(Just say yes. It’s okay if you’re lying.)