Political Nanny : McCain

Equality Now! McCain Gets a Music Video

Madeline Holler — Thu, 20 Mar 2008 17:05:00 GMT

Justice! Political Nanny has finally uncovered a music video for precious Johnny. Sure, he's a little uptight, but Obama shouldn't be the only one with a campaign set to catchy tunes.

Hallelujah, indeed! It's raining McCain.

Barack's Big Boy Speech

Madeline Holler — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 21:12:00 GMT

Barack should thank his controversial preacher.

The fiery sermons of Rev. Jeremiah Wright, which were widely played and criticized this past week, set the very stage in Philadelphia today for Obama to make this very important, very moving, very intelligent speech, "A More Perfect Union." Race is officially out on the table.

By now we all know Obama is a fabulous speaker, but this is the first time Political Nanny has heard him speak like the big boy he's getting to be. For emotional family background highlights, skip ahead to minutes 3:20. Around minute 6:00, he gets to his pastor. Minute 10:00, he's describing the church. And by 13:11, we get how Obama can reconcile the contradictions he says the Rev. Wright embodies. Obama has lived with and been loved by the embodiment of these contradictions his whole life.

"I can no more disown him than I can disown my white grandmother ... a woman who sacrificed again and again for me ... a woman who loves me as much as she loves anything in this world, but a woman who once confessed her fear of black men who passed by in the street. A woman who on more than one occasion uttered racial or ethnic stereotypes that made me cringe. These people are part of me and they are part of America, this country that I love."

He argues Wright was wrong. But that doesn't mean America has put the issues of race behind it. Obama shows he understands what's behind the Rev. Wright's words, and also that he has a deep understanding of the white/sanctimonious America's reaction to it. Neither are off the hook; he lists the consequences of both. Obama relates Wright's anger to the anger of lower and middle class Americans (including whites), who have been called on exclusively to sacrifice for all the injustice without their problems also being heard. He calls out the media for how it as exploited all of it.

The final four minutes tie up his message of unity in a pretty bow -- a demonstration of how we're all in it together, we've all got the same goals. Those goals don't include mustard and relish sandwiches. No, not in America, not for anybody.

Political speeches, especially 30+-minute ones, are often something only a political nanny could love. But not this time. This speech is brilliant -- universally brilliant.

And if you're going to accuse Political Nanny of playing favorites, please note: Charles Murray (yes, the very conservative "some folks are genetically inferior" The Bell Curve guy), thinks it's brilliant too.

What did you think? Does Obama get it? Do McCain or Clinton have enough credibility to deal with race issues? Do you think they get it?

Video: Obama08/YouTube

Readers Tell McCain's Daughter to Lose Weight

Madeline Holler — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 03:21:00 GMT

Let's take a break from the candidates this evening, and the fact that Barack Obama won Mississippi big, and talk about Political Nanny's little Republican charge, John McCain. Or, more specifically, we're going to talk about his daughter, Meghan.

She keeps a great blog of her daddy's campaign -- it has pictures, light insider gossip, song playlists, pictures of her mom in PJs, political cameos, everything. It's a fun campaign blog even if you're the deepest, darkest blue-state Republican-hating voter out there. Or very cynical like Political Nanny, who reads it in weak moments when she should be paying more substantial attention to her three candidates. The blog avoids crazy criticisms of her Dad's rivals. She sticks to BBQs, fun with the press, and mostly wants the public to know that her mother has a great sense of humor.

In a recent post, she strikes back (kindly) at readers who have sent in diet tips, or mentioned that she might consider shedding a few pounds. Seriously? People recommended she diet? A surgeon even looked to her as a potential client.

From McCainblogette.com

I've been surprised by critical comments regarding my weight and body shape. It recently reached a ridiculous level when someone handed me a business card for a plastic surgeon and suggested I needed liposuction.

First, she's a total looker, really Plus, she's smart, educated, goofy. She's not rail thin (refreshing). She says she likes her curves. Hell, she even puts those curves in horizontal stripes -- the daring! She says she wants to be a role model for her younger sister and wants to maintain a healthy weight.

Second, ugh. Sure, the blogging is for her own personal interests -- a designated bedroom in the White House and her own Secret Service detail. Bagging on Meghan McCain is fair game. She even expects that. But for her looks? Why is that always a risk women have to take when they put themselves out there in the public?

Political Nanny does not approve. Can't the daughter of an aged presidential hopeful take a shot at attracting the youth vote without worrying about the size of her ass?

Photo: McCainblogette.com

Dress Your Family in Campaign Swag and Marc Jacobs

Madeline Holler — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 22:36:00 GMT

Political statement or fashion statement? Who cares! Just order your high-end campaign T-shirts for one or both of the Democrats now (especially the Marc Jacobs Hillary tee, because, well, not being insensitive or anything, buuuut, will they be available much longer?).

Each T-shirt features the candidate, big-faced and beautiful, on the front. Obama's -- designed by grafitti artist Obey -- has street cred, style, and even screams "Hope" or "Progress," your choice. Hillary's, offered by Marc Jacobs, is more classic and features the New York senator with an American Flag lapel pin. You have to buy Hillary's in a Marc Jacobs store. Obama's you can order online. Hers is $35, his is $25. Hillary!

These T-shirts are hardly standard-issue Nannywear, but Political Nanny wants one of each anyway. She'd even take one with John McCain's face, especially if his daughter designed it and military-esque epaulettes weren't involved.

A confession: Political Nanny has already started half-packing her dear little Hillary's bag -- ready and willing to unpack it quickly if Texas and Ohio turn out for her. But Hillary's depature would leave yet another empty whole in Political Nanny's heart (she's still mourning Dennis, Fred and Mitt). Which is why she thinks she'll cherish her Hillary T-shirt for years to come. That is, if Political Nanny can ever get her hands on one. Not unlike the campaign, Obama's tee is easy to find, easy to buy, instantly rewarding. Hillary's is more of a challenge, requiring near manic dedication to see the process through to the end.

10 Things You Don't Know About The Candidates ...

Madeline Holler — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 22:21:00 GMT

... and weren't necessarily afraid to ask, just not certain it would be relevant. Well, it's not! Still, Political Nanny knows them best and wants to share some of the unknown details of all three (fine, four -- she'll work in Huckabee) of the campaigning candidates.

With the help of NY Magazine's Electopedia:

1. Barack Obama is a lefty. No, Mr. Limbaugh, we don't mean THAT kind of lefty. Obama's left-handed. Cool! (Political Nanny is too, but enough about her ...)

2. John McCain is messy, really messy.

3. Hillary Clinton's first job was for the Chicago Parks and Rec. Three days a week, she pulled a wagon of “balls, bats, jump ropes, and other supplies” to a park a few miles away from her house. Obama's first job was at a Honolulu Baskin-Robbins.

4. McCain's hair started going gray in his twenties. It turned the white we see today while he was a POW.

5. McCain was known as "Punk" and "McNasty" at the Episcopal boarding school he attended for high school. Something tells us, he didn't mind.

6. In the olden days, pre-campaign, when the candidates had free time, what do you think they liked to do? Clinton played pinochle, Obama shot hoops, and McCain attended the fights.

7. As First Lady, Clinton used to carry a bottle of hot sauce with her to spice up the eats. In 2003, when the focus was on Bill's weight-loss, she became a celebrity adherent to the low-carb South Beach Diet. Also worth nothing, Obama hates beets and McCain would gladly eat nothing but donuts and Coke.

8. Once, in 2002, Obama had to be restrained in the Illinois Senate after debate over whether to close a child-welfare office got heated and personal. (Obama voted to close it, the other guy got heated and personal.)

9. There's a flip for every flop, but each of the candidates has a core position which they have never altered. For Clinton it's that kids have certain rights and should grow up with certain benefits; for Obama it's his belief in pragmatic, bipartisan politics; and for McCain it comes down to three words -- duty, honor, country.

10. Ooops, we're forgetting Mike, poor Mike, funny, entertaining, disarming Mike. Well, here's something you might not know about him: he's still running for the Republican nomination!

Patriot Games

Madeline Holler — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 19:09:00 GMT

Hillary Clinton -- and really, everybody -- has found it difficult to criticize her "friend" Barack Obama. But rabid Republican bullies have (finally!) found a little something negative they can pile into the Swift Boat, docked as it is, waiting to be called to serve.

Just how might they attack the adored and gifted orator with an alarming amount of political party cross-over appeal?

They're questioning his patriotism.

Now, examining Obama's love for the U.S. isn't new. Over the summer, a picture of him without his hand over his heart started rumors (detractors claimed it was during the Pledge of Allegiance; in actuality, it was during the National Anthem wear hand/heart coverage is optional). Then it was noted that during the run-up to the Iraq war, Obama stopped wearing American flag label pins ("a substitute for, I think, true patriotism," he said.). There was also a brief detour into calling the avowed Christian a Muslim (which, for religious conservatives, IS like calling someone un-American). But that was finally settled at a debate in January.

Then, oops!, his wife Michelle went and said something about being proud of the U.S. for the first time in her life, a statement that was plucked from its context and plunked down into a small but growing collection of negative material against Obama -- for use this fall if/when he is the Democratic nominee.

Obama will be running against a former POW and decorated war veteran, a fact that we'll no doubt hear endlessly. But Political Nanny would not be surprised to see this gifted orator turn any patriot games into a heartfelt, emotionally inspiring call for all of us to love not just America, but Americans!, a little more and a lot less conditionally. There will be swooning and donations and an opponent who will look older, meaner, petty and perhaps seriously out of touch.

McCain, Political Nanny doesn't mind the squabbling, but you might not want to go exactly there.

Mama Obama On American Life and Luck

Madeline Holler — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 00:14:00 GMT

Michelle Obama, whose "proud for the first time" gaffe was mercifully buried by McCain's possible blonde lobbyist indiscretion later in the week, explains how, if things have been so bad in this country, she and her husband seem to be doing just fine.

Luck. She's says it's all due to good luck.

From the LA Times:

Michelle Obama often says the fact that she and her husband are out of debt is due to sheer luck, because they could not have predicted that his two books would become bestsellers. "It was like, 'Let's put all our money on red!' " she told a crowd at Ohio State University on Friday. "It wasn't a financial plan! We were lucky! And it shouldn't have been based on luck, because we worked hard."

But it shouldn't have to ride on luck, she argues. Nor should we have a country full of hedge-fund managers and corporate attorneys.

People can't raise a family on one salary anymore, she says. They can't afford to get sick even if they have insurance because of deductibles, premiums and the high cost of medication. They can't confidently send their kids to neighborhood public schools because so many of them are so bad. Young people can't afford to attend college to become teachers or nurses or journalists because those jobs don't pay enough to repay college loans.

Political Nanny doubts it's only luck -- the couple seemed already well set before he published his first book. But still, the Obama's do seem rather lucky. Didn't he launch his national political career running against Alan Keyes?

Obama Hates on Gamers

Madeline Holler — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 04:31:00 GMT

There's one group of constituents that won't be swept up in the Obama craze. Of course, these potential voters smell like toe jam and barely leave the house, so no big loss, right?

Political Nanny is talking about gamers. They and their passion are Barack Obama's go-to metaphor for underachievement, and that's got them feeling not so All Your Base on the Illinois senator's behalf.

From GamePolitics.com:

...frontrunner Barack Obama does not have a significant track record with regard to video game content issues. His speeches, however, often contain a reference to parents making their children “put away the video games.”

In making change, Obama has said we'll have to include our attitudes. "We're going to have to parent better, and turn off the television set, and put the video games away, and instill a sense of excellence in our children, and that's going to take some time."

But Obama's no griefer (unless we're talking about Hillary), argues Fordham professor and gamer Paul Levinson, who just wants him to be careful when he's dissing the group. After all, he argues, Obama's success -- in no small part due to young voters raised on TV and video games -- is proof that gaming does not necessarily breed apathy. And judging from the comments on these blogs, the gamers still like Obama best.

McCain, though, he doesn't stand a chance.

Supervisor, Champion, Promoter: Next President's Personality

Madeline Holler — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 20:17:00 GMT

Forget the policy. Forget the promises. Forget the speeches, ads, videos, rallies. Forget black, white, man, woman, Oprah, Bill, Iraq, Iran. Instead, let's consider the final three candidates' psychological inventory and put a little pseudo-science into our understanding of the Supervisor, the Champion and the Promoter out there on the campaign trail.

Emily Yoffe at Slate magazine administered to herself three Myers-Briggs personality tests -- the same one you likely took at a job interview or in a college psychology class. Only she took each of the tests on behalf of the three front-running candidates, divining answers from their various biographies, interviews, etc. Lest you think she's full of it, check this out -- a description of the resulting personality type revealed for then future president George W. Bush:

"They are decisive and little bothered by second thoughts and self-doubt." "Since [they] do not reflect very much on their errors or analyze their mistakes to any great extent, it is difficult for them to learn from their errors, and so they can become caught in a loop, repeating their mistakes."

Such accuracy is encouraging. Let's start with Hillary.

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (channeld through Yoffe) finds Clinton a Guardian. Specifically, in M-B-speak, an ESTJ or Supervisor. (Read here for more details on the whole Myers-Briggs enterprise).

Supervisors are ... steadfast, cautious, methodical. They are the reliable, detail-oriented people without whom organizations and society fall apart—which is something ESTJs won't hesitate to point out. ... self-esteem is greatest when they present themselves as dependable, trustworthy or accountable in shouldering their responsibilities." In other words, an ESTJ wants everyone to know she's "ready to be president on Day 1."

ESTJs prefer sensible talk grounded in facts. Anything else is "fanciful." Hmmm, suddenly we can pinpoint the differences in the two Democratic candidates. ESTJs also don't deal well when things don't go as planned (losing Iowa anybody? Post-Super Tuesday?). They don't have the chops to win over others with their personality, only hard work. They see the world in terms of good people and bad people (or vast right-wing conspiracies? We get the picture).

Before we get to the personality of Barack Obama, Political Nanny will leave you with this little Guardian/ESTJ tidbit:

The Guardians' steadfast posture also applies to their marriages. ... [T]hey are "extremely loyal to their mates and feel obliged to stand by them in times of trouble and help them straighten up and fly right. As a result, Guardians more easily than any other temperament can be hooked into becoming the rescuer of troubled mates."

Ooof. Loud and clear, Myers-Briggs, loud and clear.

Big surprise, Obama is an Idealist. More specifically, he's an ENFP or Champion, a type that is "filled with conviction that they can easily motivate those around them." Champions work to "kindle, to rouse, to encourage, even to inspire those close to them with their enthusiasm." Idealists "usually have a tongue of silver" and are "gifted in seeing the possibilities" of institutions and people.

Champions believe in "word magic," the ancient idea that words have the ability to make things happen—saying makes it so." This is the basis of the critique of Obama by his less-soaring opponents. Hillary complains that people ask her to "give us one of those great rhetorical flourishes and then, you know, get everybody all whooped up." (As if she could.) Says John McCain, "To encourage a country with only rhetoric is not a promise of hope. It is a platitude."

ENFPs tend to be leaders of movements (MLK, Ghandi, Thomas Paine), not presidents (there's never been an ENFP U.S. president) and not even leaders of large corporations (only 1 percent, according to people who look into this stuff are ENFPs). Note that 30 percent of corporate leaders are Hillary Clinton's type.

John McCain is an Artisan (get out!), specifically, a Promoter or ESTP, which are "practical, optimistic, cynical, and focused on the here and now." Before you get too excited, please note: Bush is an ESTP too.

"Artisans need to be potent, to be felt as a strong presence and they want to affect the course of events" ... They hunger to "have a piece of the action," "to make something happen" whether "on the battlefield" or "in the political arena." So many politicians are Artisans because "politics allows not only for maneuvering, excitement, and risk—but for powerful social impact."

They also have strong survival skills and the instincts to make it happen (POW? Dead campaign?).

Artisans "are not threatened by the possibility of failure in themselves or others, so they are likely to take risks and encourage others to do the same. ... They delight in putting themselves in jeopardy, taking chances, facing hazards." (Does this sound familiar? See: Iraq.) When times call for careful planning, or consistent, long-term management, you don't call on the ESTP.

So forget party affiliation. Forget liberal and conservative. Instead, think about which four-letter combination you want running the country. Too many downsides to all of them? Quick, Slate, work up an inventory on Huckabee!

Mighty Heartin' Huckabee

Madeline Holler — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 21:31:00 GMT

How is it that Mike Huckabee continues to enchant voters and carry whole states in these primary elections and caucuses? It can't just be his freaky ideas about Jesusing-up the Constitution. Can it?

Political Nanny thinks it has everything thing to do with the guy's persona, speaking style and ability to sound completely plugged in and relevant. The crazy talk gets lost in the one-liners. From The Caucus, the NYTimes political blog, we get these gems from a Chesapeake primary day breakfast with journalists:

On running for the United States Senate if this presidential thing doesn’t work out: “It’s more likely I’ll dye my hair green, get a bunch of tattoos and go on tour with Amy Winehouse.” He said "Amy Winehouse"! Does McCain know about Amy Winehouse?

On the recent flood of endorsements of Mr. McCain, now that he is close to securing the nomination: “What are these people saying – that they were for him all along but just forgot to tell him?” Ouch!

On why Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton seems to be struggling right now: “She does not have the personality of her husband. Very few people do.” See, he sounds completely reasonable -- not at all mean.

On why he stays in the race, despite the long political and mathematical odds: “The path to victory is a complicated one for me. The path to defeat is easy – I could just quit.” Thanks coach. Let's hit the showers!

Come on. Don't you heart Huckabee just a little? Maybe ... this much?

Good Enough Wednesday: Some Thoughts

Madeline Holler — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 13:25:00 GMT

Oh, sweet Mitt. Mitt, Mitt, Mitt. Super Tuesday? Not so super for you, Mitt. If you're planning a very special speech today, know that Political Nanny always liked you second best among the GOP. But if you're planning on burning through another 10 acres of stacked 20s from your own personal fortune, she'll think you're crazy, yet love you more than ever. Let's hope post Super Tuesday is a good-enough Wednesday for you.

And Mike! Southern voters hearted Huckabee! Sure, the West Viriginia win feels kind of disingenuous, but you take what you can get, right? Any chance you're going to turn this around and kick John McCain in the teeth? Because you are knocking them off, one-by-one.

John ... well played. That West Virginia move was slick. The rest of your wins obviously earned. Your own political surge is working.

Hillary and Barack ... this is exactly where you need to be. Tied. A continued battle. It's too soon to know. Wait! A reversal! Obama wins Missouri, not Clinton. Oops, it's still pretty close. She's got more delegates, he's got more states. She's got the old white ladies, he's got the young and the beautiful in every color and creed.

(Question: When you're George W. Bush -- or any Bush -- and you see all this "energizing" and "calls for change" and record number of voters, do you feel in any way embarassed for having created such a fuss?)

Ron Paul, you'll take (second in) Montana -- your best showing. There's a fire in this nation ...

Some extras:

Whenever reporters said "delegate-rich California," did anybody else start craving cake with a delicious, calorie-rich buttercream frosting?

Damn kids! Arnold Schwarzenegger's 18-year-old daughter followed mom Maria Shriver's endorsement, not the governor's, and voted for Barack Obama. (And wore a T-shirt in case there were any questions.)

From The Root, an African-American woman confesses that, even though she's a big ol' lefty, she's nominating Condoleeza Rice as her candidate for president. After all, the fact that a woman might vote for Obama or an AfricanAmerican might vote for Hillary Clinton just boggles the mind of pollsters and the press. However do these women make up their minds! Last night over on ABC, Sam Donaldson (who needs to hang up his toupee and retire from live broadcasting) asked, incredulously, what's a black woman to do?

Predictions ... not so easy. Even estimated bedtimes were off. No sooner were folks at CNN shaking their heads saying, "this'll be a late one ... results from delgate-rich California won't be ready until the wee hours ..." when 5 minutes later, after retrieving a pack of Little Debbie Swiss Rolls, Political Nanny noticed they called the Golden State for Clinton and McCain.

Finally, a note to John Edwards. We all know who you're going to endorse. Now that Super Tuesday is over, just come out and say it.

We'll continue licking the bowl of this delicious election throughout the day, here at Political Nanny.

The Edwards Matrix

Madeline Holler — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 11:34:00 GMT

Think of it as the grown-up version of picking a prom date.

An Edwards supporter who doesn't know which box to check on her absentee ballot has come up with a cheat sheet to figure out which candidate she will support. She has posted the Edwards Matrix for all to see.

Problem is, the matrix is inconclusive. The mom who designed it gets all the important stuff -- Iraq, healthcare, experience, hair. But the would-be dates are still in a dead heat.

Political Nanny is looking for something definitive -- a gun to her head, marching orders, whatever you got. Clinton, Obama ... Obama, Clinton. To hell with choice. Could somebody help her decide!

Seems like Republicans are less undecided than Democrats, but there are still plenty who are (but with much less consequence, since McCain seems to be far enough ahead of the others). Apparently, we undecideds are not alone. Salon's Rebecca Traister brilliantly describes how millions of Democratic voters are feeling right this very minute. And this minute. And this one too.

Who Loves You, Campaign Baby? (Rambo, Porn Stars and Writers, That's Who)

Madeline Holler — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 14:23:00 GMT

Running for president is not a popularity contest. Oh, wait, it is! And just like high school this competition hinges on the backing of other popular kids. This year's election has been a veritable Endorsement Bonanza. Everybody is getting in on it, no matter what their relevance levels, which for most, in Political Nanny's estimation, peaked somewhere between 1983-1989.

So for every Maya Angelou that steps up to stump for Hillary Clinton, there's a Toni Morrison who thinks you should vote for Barack Obama. Mike Huckabee's campaign took off after Chuck Norris promised to kick campaign butt. Now Hulk Hogan is throwing his weight around to encourage support for Obama. Rounding out the Aging Muscle-Man endorsements is Ric Flair, also for Huckabee, and Sylvester Stallone, a McCain man, naturally (this endorsement suspiciously coincided with the release of Stallone's latest Rambo movie).

This year's backers come in all shapes, sizes and professions. Here are a few more:

Vampirist Anne Rice and barrister-cum-crime-novelist John Grisham heart Clinton.

Porn star and writer of "How to Make Love Like a Porn Star" Jenna Jameson would like to tell you how to vote like a porn star -- casting a ballot for Hillary Clinton. She has her reasons. Of course, Porn Stars are not a monolith. Savanna Samson wanted to toss her lot to Rudy Giuliani, but his campaign climaxed prematurely and made a huge mess. Equally deflated is King of Porn, Hustler's Larry Flynt, who made his sweet love for Dennis Kucinich well known. Now, all Flynt has left are a few good memories of what might have been.

There was, of course, the Grande Dame of endorsers -- Oprah for Obama. Here are some other celebrity endorsements (a couple of which are even 21st-Century relevant)

Kevin Bacon - John Edwards
Donnie and Marie Osmond - Mitt Romney (Political Nanny KNEW he'd have someone!)
Lance Armstrong - John Edwards
John Mayer - Ron Paul (that body of thought is a wonderland)
Jeff Gordon - Rudy Giuliani
Bo Derek - Rudy Giuliani (eh. 7.5)
50 Cent - Hillary Clinton (word?)
Adam Sandler - Rudy Giuliani
Martha Stewart - Hillary Clinton (you OK with that, Hillary?)
George Clooney - Barack Obama (double swoon)
Harry Belafonte - John Edwards (daylight come and he went home ...)
Wilford Brimley - John McCain (dinosaurs, unite!)
Scarlett Johansson - Barack Obama

You're relevant to Political Nanny no matter when you peaked. Whose endorsement are you endorsing? Whose endorsement do you find stunning?

Thanks to BuzzFeed

Hillary: Send Me to Prison

Madeline Holler — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:33:00 GMT

Hillary Clinton said in an interview that her dream would be to compete on America's Next Top Model. She admits, though, she wouldn't have much of a chance. Now, Political Nanny doesn't like to traffic in the superficial, but, since Hillary brought it up? Yeah, not a chance.

However, the former first lady and presidential hopeful thinks she could go all the way as a contestant on Dancing With the Stars, and we don't see why not. Especially, as she says, if she gets one of the really good pros. (Oh, but not if Barack Obama is one of her competitors. In that competition? He'd be ready to lead his rhumba partner on Day 1.)

Clinton tackled these and other difficult topics with Tyra Banks earlier this week in a taping for Bank's eponymous talk show. Her interview airs Friday (check for local times ... or check in with Political Nanny, who vows to set up the Political Nanny Cam and bring the video to you.)

Other interesting tidbits: Clinton likened the White House to a prison. Some outtakes (thanks L.A. Times Top of the Ticket):

"Do you ever get lonely?" Banks asked the New York senator. "Do you ever sit in your room by yourself sometimes and just feel alone?"....

"I don't feel lonely," Clinton said. "But I do feel sometimes isolated. Because when you are in these positions that I have been in, it can be very isolating. It is one of the reasons I put on the dark glasses and the baseball cap and go out of the White House. President Harry Truman once said that the White House was like the crown jewel of the American penal system because you can feel confined."

The two also talked about what Bill Clinton should be called if he winds up the First Spouse, and whether she -- remember, future Dancing with the Stars hopeful -- does hip hop or knows the Soulja Boy or the Spongebob dance.

Well what did you expect? Oprah?

Elsewhere on Political Nanny's Playground ...

Club Dem Refuses Race Bait, One Calls Bush 'Pathetic', and Island Survival Strategies

The Democratic candidates clobbered not each other in the debates last night but two of the reps from the media. Brian Williams and Tim Russert tried hard to keep racial discord alive in their early round of questions for Clinton and Obama. But the candidates refused to be baited, bragged on the Democratic party, blah, blah. They defended each other, for example, against how their statements had been reported in the media (Barack on Russert's claim that last night's pledge to take troops out of Iraq was a change from earlier refusals to make such a pledge). They offered excuses for insinuating racism and claims of misusing historic icons being brought up in the first place. (Clinton: “We both have exuberant and sometimes uncontrollable supporters ...”)

Sure, the debate was something of a snoozer (though Political Nanny perked up when Hillary Clinton described Bush, on his trip to Saudi Arabia, as "pathetic" and "begging for lower oil prices.") The questions got so banal that toward the end candidates were asked their strengths and weaknesses. Strengths and weaknesses? Even a teenager looking for work at a video store knows how to answer that one. "I refuse to stop working until the job is done" (Clinton gave her version of that) ... I've been told I'm committed to a fault!" (Edward's take on this "weakness" classic.) Political Nanny was fully expecting them to have to tell Russert the one item they'd like to have with them if they were ever stranded on a deserted island. (A book on shipbuilding, of course!) Mercifully, there was a commercial break.

Michigan

Mitt Romney stays in the GOP race, winning 39 percent of the Republican vote in his boyhood state of Michigan. Headlines 'round the nation say this win, Romney's first, and yet another candidate with a first-place finish in these early states, "scrambles the GOP field." McCain came in second with 30 percent of the vote. Political Nanny's glad these candidates will push on for more of the statewide contests.

Also in Michigan, Hillary, the only of the three frontrunners whose name appeared on the ballot, got 55 percent of the Democratic vote. Uncommitted (code for Edwards or Obama) got 40 percent.

'It's OK to be Different': Dems Turn the Page on Race Rant

Madeline Holler — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 21:04:00 GMT

Political Nanny headed to the bookshelves and pulled out her heaviest hitters to cool down this simmering and saddening race/sex war on the Democratic campaign trail.

For a recent storytime, she assembled her candidates and the Todd Parr "we're all in this together" oeuvre. These colorful children's books starring stick figures of all shapes, sizes and species with the none-too-subtle titles like It's OK to Be Different, This is My Hair, The OK Book, The Feelings Book, ... well, you get the picture ... gave the candidates a chance to remember that nobody owns sadness and suffering more than another and what's truly valued over skin/chromosomes is strength, substance, and a plausible healthcare plan.

Political Nanny thinks they got the picture. (For how things degenerated, a great summary at MSNBC.)

Barack called for an end to the feud. As reported on Politico:

"Obama, too, indicated he wants a truce, saying at a media availability in Reno, Nev., that the campaign “shouldn’t be personal.”

“Bill and Hillary Clinton have historically and consistently been on the right side of the civil rights movement,” Obama said.

Obama also said he didn’t want the campaign "to degenerate into so much tit-for-tat, back and forth that we lose sight of why all of us are doing this."

Hillary stepped up with a statement calling for party unity when it comes to the rights of all Americans.

“We [Clinton and Obama] differ on a lot of things. And it is critical to have the right kind of discussion on where we stand. But when it comes to civil rights and our commitment to diversity, when it comes to our heroes - President John F. Kennedy and Dr. King – Senator Obama and I are on the same side.

“And in that spirit, let's come together, because I want more than anything else to ensure that our family stays together on the front lines of the struggle to expand rights for all Americans.”

Political Nanny has also been reminded that no matter how different we feel that we are from another, there is always, somewhere, common ground and agreement. Which is why Political Nanny finds herself in the unfamiliar position of agreeing with New York Times columnist David Brooks. Not everything (and that's OK), but scroll to the bottom and we get this:

"The final two points I’d make are: First, this whole show seems stale and deranged to the younger set, as Obama and Clinton seemed to recognize when they damped down the feud yesterday afternoon. The interesting split is not between the feminist and civil rights Old Bulls, it’s between the establishments of both movements, who emphasize top-down change, and the younger dissenters, who don’t. Second, this dispute is going to be settled by the rising, and so far ignored, minority group. For all the current fighting, it’ll be Latinos who end up determining who gets the nomination.

At last, a bridge to the 21st century."

Todd Parr, don't you agree?

More in candidate-care ... Two Extra Cookies

Political Nanny is awarding a Clark County (Nev.) judge two extra cookies at snacktime today for ruling that NBC must include Dennis Kucinich in tonight's debates on MSNBC. NBC, who is appealing that ruling, argues only the top three Democratic contenders should be involved. Political Nanny wholeheartedly disagrees. Who cares if Dennis hasn't racked up delegates. He's running for president. He's a national figure. Plus, they invited him!

Everybody Gets a Blue Ribbon!

Our handsome boy Mitt leads in today's Republican primary in Michigan. Political Nanny is secretly crossing her fingers for him to win. He really wants to, it's the state he grew up in. Sure, he's a touch out of touch, promising to rebuild the auto industry when, to put it bluntly, that's quite unlikely. Still. She'd like to see as many candidates stay in the Republican race as long as possible.

Foodie in the House!

This isn't directly related to the presidential elections, but it might be a taste, literally, of what Democratic leadership at the highest levels could bring. Seems House Speak Nancy Pelosi has taken her promise to "green" the House into the cafeteria. Now hungry staffers can dine on healthy stuff, the harvest of which doesn't wreck the environment.

Naturally, the prices have increased considerably and that's not so great. But what's funny and telling are many of the comments, especially those admonishing "Nanny Nancy."

Just imagine what those commenters would say to Babysitter Barack or Househelper Hillary or Meddling Mike -- or any other future president who might actually take the health of the entire nation seriously.

Photo: AP via Politico

Image: Amazon.com

Primary's Baby: N.H. Girl Stalks the Candidates

Madeline Holler — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 17:47:00 GMT

You can tell a lot about a presidential candidate by the way s/he holds a baby. OK, not really. But we're going to deeply analyze it anyway. Why? Because it's fun, because it's naughty, because Political Nanny wishes SHE would have thought of doing what this forward-thinking and shameless contributor to Slate has done.

Darren Garnick, a New Hampshire resident, hauled his five-week-old daughter Dahlia to campaign events around his home state, handing her over to candidates and capturing the moment in a stillshot. The results? Fabulous! The slide show is at once a marvelous demonstration of parenting at its least protective and political coverage at its weakest. In other words, refreshing!

First up is Barack Obama, who winds up holding Dahlia on two different occasions -- the first time in a sweet (and completely competent) traditional infant cradle hold, the second time while Dahlia wears a "Black Power" bib at a rally. Let's look at the cradle hold: Obama is clearly a man who put in the hours with his own kids. He's got two, but they're young and there's not a lot of distance between daily baby-holding and this picture. (We need to keep that in mind when we look at the pics of some campaign trail parents whose own days of second-nature infant handling (the floppy necks!) are decades behind them.) At the rally, Garnick reports that Obama kissed Dahlia's forehead (melt) and then held her up for cheers.

Next up, Rudy Giuliani is stuck with the screeching girl in a fleece pumpkin costume. He looks like he's going to drop her, but he hangs on tight. He was at a disadvantage -- how do you securely snuggle with a squirmy winter vegetable? Let's not judge Rudy too harshly.

Then there's John McCain, who launches the beginning of a curious trend in the baby holds: he's circled his thumb and four fingers around one of Dahlia's legs. Political Nanny doesn't recall doing this with her babes. Perhaps it's an older generation male thing? Because Edwards, Kucinich and (look closely) Romney are doing it too. Political Nanny is not saying it's harmful, just curious. Did they learn this in a Kissing the Baby workshop at Let's Play President summer camp?

What you really want to know, though, is something about Hillary Clinton's baby snuggling chops. Well, hold your "cold-heart" comments, she does just fine with Dahlia, who gazes right into the mother-of-one's eyes. Sure, there's a bit of stiffness in the hold, but Hillary's kid is pushing 30. Maybe it's been awhile. Please note, however, that Hillary is doing that protective palm-around-the-shoulders upper hand thing, which Political Nanny always appreciates when strangers hold her little ones.

In addition to the leg-grip, Mitt Romney does the fingers-around-the-neck upright baby display so competently, he'd make any OB/Gyn proud (except maybe Ron Paul). Garnick notes that the picture, which includes Romney's wife, looks like the New Hampshire father is giving up Dahlia for adoption to a rich white couple. Agreed!

Finally, we see Huckabee and Chuck Norris in a horizontal split-screen shot. Huckabee's doing the hands-under-armpits-with-dangling legs hold (baby facing outward), while Chuck Norris has turned his arm into a seat, allowing Dahlia to rest against his chest. He lays a hand -- it's a registered weapon! -- protectively against her chest. Well done, Chuck, well done!

Garnick didn't get Dahlia into the arms of Fred Thompson (who didn't do much in New Hampshire) or Duncan Hunter (what a relief!) or Ron Paul (coulda shown Mitt a thing or two). And he admits Mike Gravel freaks him out, so he didn't stand a chance. But Political Nanny is grateful for the slideshow and its insight. How will the candidates handle Iraq? Who cares! How are they going to cuddle the nation?

Photo: Slate.com

Candidates Play Musical Chairs

Madeline Holler — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 13:22:00 GMT

When election officials pressed pause and the candidates scrambled to their seats last night, the line-up in that round of musical chairs reshuffled. Hillary Clinton moved from third in Iowa to first in New Hampshire. Edwards dropped from second last week to third last night. Obama's second-place finish in the primary was a letdown after his first-place finish in the caucuses. (See above for best disappointing-returns photo ever. Is that couple real or what?! Ahem, back to the results.) So far in this round for Democrats, no one will follow Chris Dodd and Joe Biden in leaving the game. A good thing.

Over with the GOP, only Mitt Romney landed in the same chair he started out in, while John McCain scrambled to get the empty first-place one. Huckabee settled for third, which sets him back a bit since his first-round win last week in Iowa.

The other candidates -- Bill Richardson, Rudy Giuliani, Fred Thompson, Ron Paul, all the rest -- continue to try to connect with voters, register with the media and gather support for better finishes.

What does it all mean? Did the tears work for Hillary? (Shame on you, NYTimes and Maureen Dowd for today's column headlined "Can Hillary Clinton Cry Her Way Back Into the White House?") Or was it the case she laid out in the debate two nights before? Are those truly independent voters buying the maverick message of John McCain? Was the media's infatuation with Barack Obama not enough to entice New Hampshire voters to cast ballots for him? Or was it the weather? The lack of college students? The speeches? The promises?

New Hampshire is another small state with a big early influence on the elections. So Political Nanny is glad to see the shake-up. She'd like all the candidates to stay in the race for another month. There's more to be said of the bigger ideas to the broader audiences. Iowa and New Hampshire were practice rounds. On Jan. 15, Hillary Clinton runs against herself and the "uncommitted" votes protesting the fact that their favorite candidates are not on the ballot. After that, the Nevada caucuses and South Carolina primarie on Jan. 19. Ten days after that, big Florida. We're all waiting anxiously for the music to pause, again and again and again. Because there's nothing quite as exhilirating as play musical chairs with closely matched peers.

Photo: NYTimes.com

Sensory Overload During N.H. Primary

Madeline Holler — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 21:07:00 GMT

Seriously, Political Nanny is just waiting for a nationwide media meltdown. Reporters laying face down on the ground. Photographers throwing their equipment across the room. Candidates pounding their fists and bawling like babies. (That may have begun to happen already.) There's just so much going on, so much to say, so many ways to look at today's primaries in New Hampshire.

Let's start with the crying:

Hillary Clinton got emotional yesterday when she was talking to a small group of voters in New Hampshire. She teared up. She visibly suppressed a lump in her throat. And she set off a fit of commentary on what the tears meant, whether they were geniune, were they a part of a new post-Iowa campaign makeover, and why did she wait so long.

Today, Fox News reported that uber campaign strategists James Carville and Paul Begala would be riding in to rescue Hillary campaign. Which must have given die-hard Clintonistas a bit of relief. However, were now reading that, no, no, no, it's not true. You're kidding. Fox got it wrong? But there are likely changes coming for her campaign staff. Political Nanny has been waiting for that announcement for a couple of weeks. Oh, and in case you'd like to put Political Nanny on retainer, she'll give you her first nugget of advice for free, Hillary, release Chelsea from the grips of your protective motherly instincts! Let her talk! Let her be interviewed! Help her help you!

Free ride:

The other Clinton, Bill, accuses the media of giving Barack Obama and John Edwards a free ride. Naturally, the media doesn't believe it. Let's be honest, though. Obama is simply interesting, which doesn't necessarily make him a better president, just a better news story. So, while Political Nanny wouldn't call it a free ride, she would call the media's handling of Obama a comfortable ride at a nice price.

Now, Political Nanny would be remiss in not sharing the fact that (1) when doing Google searches for pictures of her candidates, it's much easier to find authoritative yet friendly, strong yet sensitive, handsome yet intelligent pictures of John Edwards and Barack Obama than it is of Hillary Clinton. Look at this picture on CNN.com today of Obama. Why not just Photoshop in a halo? They've got pixie dust flaking off his head! Just saying ...

Also, we know a lot about Obama's good work -- South Side Chicago, the international travel, fun with hard drugs, that kind of thing. And for Edwards? Well, he reminds us of his life's story every time he gets to a mic. (And it's a good story, don't get me wrong!). But for Hillary? We get to hear about her cheating husband. I mean, for god's sake, she's the first woman to really have a shot at becoming president of the U.S. She's got more of a backstory than woman done wrong, no?

Whew! That nearly triggered a Political Nanny meltdown! Back to New Hampshire ...

What hinges on McCain's outcome:

John McCain needs to do very well in New Hampshire to keep his campaing going. What's amazing is that he actually has a chance. He's been getting more support -- Iowa notwithstanding -- and the campaign we were all willing to write off over the summer has survived (but isn't survival what McCain is all about?). Political Nanny wants to see McCain stay in the race. He adds to the tension among the GOP candidates, which reminds the rest of them to behave. Plus, he's got a nasty streak that's quite entertaining.

Oh, man, Mitt needs to rally!:

Last week in Iowa, Huckabee stole the thunder that was a Mitt Romney win and eventual nomination. And now, everybody's looking at McCain. What does this mean for Mitt? A second-place finish, while not the worst possible outcome, it's also not what he expected. And for the GOP in N.H., second-place is the new also-ran, since Huckabee hasn't really bothered much with a campaign there.

Running low on ballots:

Perhaps the most aggravating news that comes out today is that some counties in the state are running low on ballots. My goodness, aren't we just screwing up elections year after year in the United States? Here's hoping the ballot supply lasts until the last voter goes home. If not -- if this primary gets contested or yields inconclusive results by tomorrow morning -- well, that's when Political Nanny promises you SHE'LL throw a tantrum.

So amidst the crying, the surging, the polling, the voting, try to stay calm, dear candidates. Try to stay calm.

Break Out the Diapers: Candidates Demand a Change!

Madeline Holler — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 04:35:00 GMT

Candidates from both parties are beginning to sound like a room full of neglected toddlers wearing sagging, saturated diapers. "Change, change, change," they all yelled, screamed, demanded, whimpered during a weekend of debates in New Hampshire. "I'm here for change!"

Well, hold on a second, Mitt and Hillary and John McCain. Just last week you were bragging about your experience and training and ability to, if elected, go on the potty starting from Day 1!

But Political Nanny understands. You're all wetting your pants after the Iowa Caucus when the new kids Barack and Mike got most of the attention and a whole lot of love -- love and support you had hoped (expected?) would mostly be yours. Since everyone is reading these not-totally-surprising-but-still-very-notable wins as Americans wanting change, well, that's what you'll all give them: change!

In Saturday's Facebook/ABC News back-to-back Republican and Democratic debates and again on Fox for Republicans on Sunday, the talk was about change. Change in immigration. Change in healthcare. Change in Iraq. Change in foreign relations. Change in the status quo. Change in monetary systems. Change in leadership style. Change in change.

The Republicans:

On Saturday, Fred Thompson sounded like he was BSing, a lot, let Political Nanny just get that out there. He seemed caught off-guard. John McCain was ready with a zinger for Romney at nearly every turn. Giuliani got in a couple as well. It was kind of a Mitt Romney pile on. Interestingly, Mike Huckabee sat back a bit. Answered his questions. Stayed out of the fray. Safe.

Side note: perhaps Political Nanny is starting to identify with her captors, and some kind of mainstream media Stockholm Syndrome is clouding her judgment, but Saturday's debates were the best so far for both parties. There was no schtick to upstage the candidates (like videos or planned questions from the audience), and Charlie Gibson allowed the candidates to talk and ignore the clock a bunch.

Even better, Gibson followed up on a couple of points Political Nanny has been curious about: He pressed Republican candidates, who say tax credits are the way to get more Americans insured, by crunching the numbers -- basically laying out how $15,000 in annual premiums (which is essentially what employers are paying for a family) can't possibly be written off the taxes of families with incomes of $60,000. They would only be able to write off something like $3,000. (This is the same problem I see with health savings accounts (Guiliani's healthcare strategy). How do you build up enough to cover ongoing health checkups -- particularly for families who have young kids (well baby checkups must add up to a fortune) and need those expensive immunizations and still have something left over for a catastrophe or, say, minor surgery?)

So Charlie crunched the numbers for them, which no one responded directly to, but that's about when John McCain jumped in and said the trick is to control inflation, so that healthcare won't cost $15,000. Riiiiiight. Huckabee said we have a "disease care system," and not a health care system and wanted to shift to prevention and, of course, control costs (yet have it remain a free-market enterprise. Hmmm.). Romney wants the states to handle it how their governors see fit. But he wants to give support (and money?) at the federal level.

The Democrats:

There was some fun sparring to watch, especially as Barack Obama and John Edwards hooked harms and took on Hillary Clinton, later pointed about by moderator Gibson and getting a laugh from Clinton, "you noticed?" Overall, Clinton wanted voters to believe that she doesn't have to convince them that she's a candidate for change (see? "change!"), since she's been about change her whole life. Then she cited a few things that she's changed, particularly getting healthcare for children in Arkansas. And said, as the first woman president, she would quite distinctly embody change.

Edwards wanted us to know that he has lived through the struggles facing American families and that his desire for change is personal. And possible: he claims he has never taken money from lobbyists or PACs and that he wouldn't allow lobbyists in the White House and, therefore, would be beholden to no one but Americans.

Obama defended his ability to inspire as an important catalyst for change, that inspiring Americans builds momentum and support for change.

Bill Richardson said, "I love change," after also defending experience, a notion that has taken a beating as of late. "What's wrong with experience? We want to change this country, but we have to know how to do it." (Political Nanny detected a defense on behalf of Hillary. So kind.)

Speaking of Richardson, Political Nanny would like to hug him. He provided just the right kind of levity the debate needed to ease the tension and pull the rhetoric back a little to remind everyone they were talking about real issues, actual events, and American lives.

Next up ... the New Hampshire Primaries tomorrow (Tuesday, Jan. 8).

Iowans Play Favorites. Political Nanny Still Doesn't

Madeline Holler — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 05:34:00 GMT

Well, that was that. The candidates stepped out and tested the cold, cold waters of voter approval last night in Iowa. Political Nanny stood at the side, waiting with towels and hot drinks and, for some, a soft hankie to cry in.

Her boys Mike Huckabee and Barack Obama swam confidently to shore, winning their parties' races by about 9 percentage points each. Obama won most of the female vote and most of the younger voters' support too.

Her tough fighters Hillary Clinton and John Edwards, and recently challenged Mitt Romney, flapped their arms and gasped and fought their way to finish in respectable positions and not terribly far behind the winners. Each of them vowed to continue fighting. Each of them is ready to regroup and start again. In five days. Whew!

But quite a few of Political Nanny's babes sank to the bottom. Fred Thompson, John McCain, and Ron Paul made it to the double digits. Joe Biden, Rudy Giuliani and Bill Richardson, and especially Duncan Hunter and Chris Dodd, wellllll, they did their best. But it wasn't great. In fact, Political Nanny will spend the day packing up Chris's bag, gathering his toys, taking down his pretty pictures, and telling him good-bye. He has decided he won't be needing Political Nanny's care any longer. His little friend Joe Biden -- God, remember how hard it was to tell them apart? -- is leaving Political Nanny too.

Down to 13 monkeys jumping on the bed. Time to pack for New Hampshire.

Photo: MSNBC.com

Election Milestone: Candidates Take First Steps In Iowa (Quick, Get the Camera!)

Madeline Holler — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 15:38:00 GMT

Political Nanny is sitting on pins and needles, at once excited, deliriously proud of and terrified for her candidates. Today, the 15 reach such an important milestone: the Iowa caucuses. They look so grown up! It seems like just yesterday ...! It's all happening so fast (well, not really.)

As the unruly group of them toddles around on stages, grabbing at microphones, saying "cheese" for the camera, and slobbering all over Iowans one last time in hopes of charming each and every one of these Midwesterners to go out tonight and be counted at the caucus (and chances are, they won't), Political Nanny is watching and trying to remember Iowa is not the final word. It's the first, only the first. We caregivers -- those of us experienced with cadidate-children -- know that the early walker in Iowa will not acurrately predict who gets to sit in the White House highchair. (Remember little guy Dick Gephardt?) See, there's time to catch up.

In the meantime, Political Nanny will be watching her babes today as they smile and shake hands and talk pretty and learn their numbers (polls and precinct percentages are the new flashcards!). She'll be watching tonight as the reports come in. Tomorrow, she'll usher the remaining ones over to New Hampshire for primaries there next week.

Those little buggers never could sit still.

Political Nanny Can't Help But Play Favorites

Madeline Holler — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 14:09:00 GMT

Political Nanny truly adores most of her charges, those rascally politicians begging for everybody’s attention and keys to the White House. Like any caregiver, each has earned her affections in different ways.

She is moved by the unselfconscious determination of Hillary; loves the charm and ease of Mike H., Joe, Chris and Barack; delights in the unpolished edges of Rudy and Dennis; winces at the grit and anger of John M.; and appreciates the attempt to be earnest by Mitt, Ron, Bill and Fred. Her Mike G. gets a little lost in the shuffle. Duncan and Tom get on her nerves (she quietly blames their parents).

But little John E. has to be Political Nanny’s favorite, always saying the right thing, always trying his best. He, too, is charming and determined. And kind. So kind. He seems to know what’s important, what the country needs now (or at least what Political Nanny needs now), how to help, what has to change. Perhaps he’s too earnest, too helpful, too smart. Or perhaps Political Nanny is just that gullible -- or old-fashioned, praising the actions and words of yet another white rich guy who wants to be head of the class. Maybe kind and topical just doesn't cut it -- maybe that shouldn't cut it!

It doesn't matter, actually, since John E. hasn’t managed to get most of anybody’s attention, even Political Nanny’s, and it doesn’t look likely that he’ll get enough of anybody’s support, even hers. Political Nanny wishes there was a little more of John E. in each of her other charges. Which would make picking a president just that much easier. If that were the case, she’d like the rest even more.

Here’s the latest endearment to come out of her little John E.’s mouth (she could do without the background music) that speaks to Political Nanny in just the right way. He doesn't just make a promise of healthcare for all, he makes an honest (if quick) assertion of who and what is in the way of accomplishing exactly that. Who else is pointing fingers (at the problem, not each other)?

First-Spouse Primer: The Women (and Man) Behind the Men (and Woman)

Madeline Holler — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 14:53:00 GMT

Can’t tell a Tancredo from a Hunter? A Gravel from a Paul? Richardson, Thompson, Huckabee, Dodd -- is it all kind of blending together?

Then you’re really screwed when it comes to their spouses, because there are a lot of blond and younger second wives to keep track of. The good news is many will be old news in a matter of a few months.

So get to know them while you can. Salon’s Rebecca Traister has put together a fabulous guide to the first balls-and-chains, complete with how-they-met summaries and delicious little factoids.

For example, Mike Huckabee and his wife Janet, who lost a bid for Arkansas secretary of state a few years ago, registered for $6,000 worth of house-warming gifts after a recent move. The avarice! And Ann Romney, wife of recently declared pro-life candidate Mitt, once wrote a $150 check to Planned Parenthood. Mmmmhhmmmm. And there's so much about Judith Giuliani I don't know where to start -- that she buys an extra seat on airplanes for her purse?

The first-slate is also filled with professionals – loooooots of lawyers but also a college professor (Jill Biden), a business consultant (Jackie Dodd), the head of a huge family business (Cindy McCain), and a political consultant (Jeri Thompson). Don’t worry, the stand-by-your-man, cookie-baking first lady type – so defended after being disparaged by another first lady -- is still lurking there somewhere, but her chances aren’t looking very good.

Image: Salon.com