Love is Blind

Browse by Tags

• Potty Training Myself

  Teaching a toddler, my toddler in particular,  to pee and poop on a toilet has always been something that I didn’t particularly look forward to.  You can call me lazy, awful, horrible and a shitty parent all you want (no pun intended) but I just never got super excited at the thought of potty training GiGi.  First of all, the word “training” instantly brings me thoughts of the Olympics, or animals who do tricks, both of which are quite cool but not exactly the image of my child on a potty seat.  The idea of my daughter learning to go to the bathroom outside of her pants isn’t first on the list, however screwed up that is.  So, the wording alone puts me off, never mind the actual possibility of my child giving me more fun messes to clean up in the future. (****And on a side note - if they call it "potty training" does that make me the coach?  If so, where are my whistle, jersey, and both head and arm sweatband?  Do we need a sponsor?)   I want her to have the independence that comes along with going to the bathroom alone, really I do.  I also love entertaining the idea that my wallet will be fatter from spending less money on diapers, etc.  With anything that my babe does, it’s on her schedule and at her pace, this much I’ve learned.  Family and friends and lovely sites have talked about toddlers+bathrooms=challenge.  It was inevitable that being a first time mother I would try to pick up some tips on what might make sense for potty training bathroom Olympics protocol.  One week GiGi had this epiphany that peeing in her diaper is something far too exciting to keep to herself, and when she shares that news with me I change her diaper.  Voila!  Picking up on what she was layin’ down, I began the whole potty training thing with the deluxe clone of a big potty that comes in the delightful shade of baby blue and produces stickers when she flushes and music when she is both trying to go potty and when she actually goes.  Sensors, stickers, music, and a flip up toilet seat…what’s not to love right?  Right.   GiGi played with the potty constantly. Played as in the past tense of play.  I opted for a potty seat that fits on the “big girl potty” and removed the deluxe toddler potty because the only use we were getting out of that was a make shift ipod (or would that be ppod?) and a removable pee holder that my kid would suck on.  Don’t worry, it isn’t as gross as it sounds. If she had actually sat on the seat with a bare butt to pee instead of giving the seat a little ass-drive-by,  then I would have freaked out a little more.   GiGi is the proud owner of a princess pink designed potty seat that I couldn’t care less about and she doesn’t understand at all (fyi: we have stricken the word PRINCESS from our vocabulary here.  Unless there is one shaking your hand at Disneyland or you’re referring to a Disney song sung by one).  She has a little step to help her off of the potty and a few other items to assist in potty time.  Being that I am doing this whole “training” thing and the last that this situation arose I was a kid myself and on the learning end of it – I don’t know jack about what I’m doing.  Peeing and pooping and loving GiGi are all natural things so I figure I’ll just wing it.         (Potty Animal)   I know that I have, thus far, created a potty monster.  She is getting awfully demanding in the bathroom although Im sure if she had better-than-terribly two- manners it would just seem ritualistic and normal.  Anytime she is set on the potty, she screams “water!” and “bookie! Fish!” which means, “Hey mom can you please fetch me a little cup by the toothbrushes and fill it with water and then grab my Dr. Seuss One fish two fish Braille book?  Thanks, you’re a dear.”   If the previously stated needs are not met, then I get to deal with potty boss and her wicked refusal to pee.  I try to shutdown her crankiness, and appease her wishes, since I am the one who created this standard of potty training.  When I originally started taking her to the bathroom, I brought her a book for double reasons.  1.) maybe she would sit longer with a book she loves, and, 2.) who doesn’t like something trashy to read on the toilet?  I’m sure most people don’t find Dr. Seuss trashy, and on the whole I don’t either, but how responsible is it to have a fish driving a car in the water?  And counting too?  Sounds like a sobriety check to me, don’t you think (coughcoughLindsayLohanoftheFishWorldcough)?  Im just saying its like a toddler version of In Touch magazine….ish.    Read More... Posted Jul 13 2009, 08:17 AM by Megg with | with 14 comment(s) Filed under: blind children, blind, struggle, water, pee, potty training, gia, tmi, poop, poo, bath room, visually impaired gigi, bodily functions, princess are on everything and its making me sick, potty seat

• Poop.

  GiGi and I are crazy young ladies with wild on our side and a pocket full of routine to keep us grounded.  It’s a cute pocket, but it’s awfully heavy.  At night, GiGi either takes a bath or cleans up in a tot bath in the gigantic shower we are blessed enough to have.  When we finish with the lather-rinse-repeat, my child and I stroll back to my bedroom where she avoids her diaper and I attempt to get pajama’d in record time.  It’s a simple routine; showering, getting dressed, and then brushing our teeth before bedtime.  I’ve learned that if I change the bulletin list in any way, trouble arises.   A few nights ago, GiGi ran down the hallway yelling “Papa! Papa!” so I figured that it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if I were to let her tell my father goodnight while I scurried to get dressed and ready her pjs/ lotion/ diaper/ nightly shot (growth hormone, not tequila)/ toothbrush and book.  What’s cuter than a baby tush flashing past their grandparents?  Nothing.      It all seemed so innocent.  Naked time for the babe and a series of loud  “awwww’s” and “ well hello there’s” followed by giggles.  I was done in two minutes flat.  Do you know what can happen in two minutes, aside from dressing and prepping?   Poop.    Everywhere.   I walked down the hallway to grab my naked monster baby who I could hear rambling at the other end of the house and as I approached the end, I saw it.  It looked like little hot wheels scattered across the carpet where the hallway finished and the living room began.  “is that poop?’’ I thought.   I stopped and listened and only heard GiGi talking to herself.  If it was poop, there wasn’t anyone who had noticed it.  I flipped on the light and found big people sized pooplings laying about, mocking my new, capricious routine of letting GiGi run naked.  The cute had officially worn off and faded into a crap stained carpet.   It’s never a good idea to rattle the elders at night so I quietly ran to the kitchen to grab some cleaning supplies.  When I returned and looked closer at the mess, not only did I see the poop, I saw two smooshes.  One was an obvious foot smashing and the other?  The other was a wheel mark.  I’m not going to lie – I panicked.  Not only was there a mess on the carpet, but now it was a traveling mess.  Read More... Posted Apr 28 2009, 01:36 PM by Megg with | with 13 comment(s) Filed under: gross, gigi, toddlers, gia, chairs, tmi, poop, shit talking, poo, parents indeed love the poo talk, crap, slides, pooping on the carpet, couches, shit