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"The Picture Tom Cruise Doesn't Want You to See" - Get Yer Angry Baldy Right Here, Folks

HerBadMother — Tue, 20 Nov 2007 16:23:00 GMT

That picture that Tom Cruise doesn't want you to see? The story is that the diminutive Scientologist and the producers of the Ben Stiller movie (Tropic Thunder) in which he appears just don't want the 'surprise' cameo ruined for fans. Which, whatever. If there's really anybody out there who would get a big thrill out of seeing a fat, balding Tom appear unexpectedly in a Ben Stiller movie, I doubt that they're going to be put off by a little spoiler or two. You'd have to be a die-hard Tomophile to get off on the combination of Tom, prosthetics and Ben Stiller. Really.

My guess? The producers of the Ben Stiller movie orchestrated the dissemination of those photos to drum up press for the movie - because, really, how many Ben Stiller movies have done boffo box office recently? (how many Tom Cruise movies have done boffo box office recently?) - and Tom's just choked because a) his 'serious' movie is a flop and he's still stinging from that, b) he looks like a right idiot, and c) put those two things together and you have the perfect recipe for a Scientologist hissy fit.

Get a good look at the picture and get your giggles in while you can; the deputies of Xenu will make us take it down soon.

Photo source: Just Jared

Tom Cruise Is Fat, Bald & Hot!

Sassy Smith — Sun, 18 Nov 2007 17:01:00 GMT

Did I say hot? I meant, pass me a bucket. Cruise is set to appear in Ben Stiller's comedy, Tropic Thunder, slated for a July 2008 release. Mark your calendars!

Cruise is apparently playing a studio mogul in the film, which also stars, Matthew McConaughey, Robert Downey, Jr., Jack Black, Nick Nolte, Bill Hader and Justin Theroux. The movie is about a group of actors shooting a big budget war movie and through some freak occurrences, they end up being forced to become the soldiers they are portraying. Sounds absolutely ~~strange~~ riveting!

I can't take my eyes off of that chest hair. I'm assuming Tom is in costume in that above picture, but hey, maybe that's his real look and when we see him out with Katie Holmes, that look is really the costume. Oh zing!

Photo source: Just Jared

Britney's Boys Look Happy!

Sassy Smith — Sun, 18 Nov 2007 15:36:00 GMT

Britney Spears' boys, Sean Preston, 2, and Jayden James, 1, have never looked happier! They are...

PHOTOS AFTER THE READ

...with their grandmother Federline, and I must say they are cute kids. It's nice to see that they do get some stability in their lives and can have some "normal" interactions with family instead of sitting, strapped in a car seat, being blinded by flashing bulbs.

The photos were taken for Life & Style Weekly magazine.

Photo credit: Life & Style Weekly

Jessica Alba Pregnant?

Sassy Smith — Sat, 17 Nov 2007 13:04:00 GMT

The normally svelte looking Jessica Alba didn't look as such at the premiere of her new movie Awake.

Alba had some kind of lace contraption on, which, yes, was a dress, but a sort of hideous mess of gathered material. I suppose it could be the way the lace is all puckered at the front of her stomach that is making her "appear" pregnant but perhaps she's actually trying to hide a "baby bump." Plus, the fact that Jessica is reunited with her long time beau, Cash Warren, could mean she's with child. 'Cause I bet their having, you know, sex. And, and, and she looks "glowy". Is glowy a word? Yes, of course it is! Look it up in the "pregnant" dictionary of perfectly acceptable words to use when describing a woman a with baby in her womb. Just a little FYI..."fat" is never acceptable when talking to a preggo lady.

Photo credit: PR Photos

It's A Boy for Christina Aguilera & Jordan Bratman!

Sassy Smith — Sat, 17 Nov 2007 12:02:00 GMT

Christina Aguilera let it slip that she's having a boy, while speaking to Access Hollywood, as she hosted the nationwide launch for Rock the Vote 2008, Tuesday evening.

Aguilera referred to her unborn child as "him." Add that to being seen buying alot of "blue" baby items, and I'm betting they really are having a son. Plus, she looks like she's carrying a boy. See? I'm a mom and a master sleuth. Moms just know this stuff about other moms! ~~No I'm not crazy~~.

Photo source: Celebrity-gossip